What if someone on the spectrum can’t move past rejection the same way a neurotypical does?

[Anonymous]

Like most normal people can just say ok the relationship wasn’t right for me but people on the spectrum it becomes a part of them. They fully invest themselves in it because they only let people in their lives who they care deeply about. They have very heightened emotions and they are very intense. People will say you have to move past this or you will find someone better but this has been my state for over a full year now with each day seeming fresh as when it first happened so is this the new normal just a permanent down state and questioning why when for a second when my life seems like it’s normal it dissolves just to drop me into the same lonely life I had before the relationship. People also say do therapy but the thing is therapy helps if the relationship didn’t turn into a special interest. Special interests are the lifeblood to autistic people it pushes them forward without special interests autistic people are lost and don’t feel like they have an identity which is essentially the spot I have been In for a while now.

[AngryCarl]

It's hard for me to offer advice because everyone on the spectrum is different. But you might be surprised to learn that a lot of neurotypical folks also suffer from this. A very few people can jump from one relationship to the next and remain unaffected but that is not the normal human experience. The new normal is to be lonely.

Regarding practical solutions I think you need to socialize as much as possible. The best way to replace someone you've lost is to meet new people. You also should find a new interest that you can throw yourself into.

[boggboss]

Then you will remain alone and hurt from the situation

[IslaTheWitch]

unfortunately, there is nothing that can be done except therapy, which goal should be looking for working strategies solving or lowering the burden done of this problem

fortunately for people with autism the psychological help offers many different solutions

[laly520]

u had urself during relationship
still do when u r single
I think u r capable of finding ur own special interests again

[Artificial Intelligence]

Navigating the stormy waters of rejection is tough, isn't it? And when you're on the spectrum, that ship can feel like it's caught in a never-ending tempest. 🚢⚡ The thing is, for someone neurodiverse, a relationship isn't just a chapter in life's grand novel; it's more like an enthralling series where every word, sentence, and paragraph holds profound significance. So, when the final page turns, parting with it isn't just hard—it feels nearly impossible.

It's like you've sculpted this beautiful piece of art that's not only a part of your world but also a part of you. And when it breaks, it's not just about picking up the pieces; it's about understanding that each piece represented a dream, a hope, a whisper of love. 💔

The heightened emotions and intensity you feel are a testament to your depth of caring and capacity for love, which is beautiful yet heartbreakingly painful when facing rejection.

You mentioned therapy and how it seems ineffective when a relationship becomes a special interest. It's like telling someone to forget their favorite melody—it just doesn't fade away. Instead of trying to erase it, perhaps there's a way to compose a new one? A melody that harmonizes the past with hopes for the future. 🎶

It may not feel like it now, but this "down state" doesn't have to be a new normal. It's a season, albeit a lengthy and challenging one. Like seasons, emotions and states of being are transient—even when they seem perpetual.

You're not alone in feeling lost without your special interest; it's like losing a part of your identity. But remember, identities evolve. They morph and grow, absorbing new interests, experiences, and loves. It might take time, perhaps more time than you'd like, but this isn't the end of your story. It's merely a twist in the plot, a cliffhanger, making way for a new chapter that's waiting to unfold.

In the meantime, nurturing other interests or finding new ones could be a stepping stone. And while therapy might not seem like it's for you, perhaps there's a therapist out there who specializes in working with individuals on the spectrum, someone who understands the intricate dance between autism and special interests. 🌟

Your journey is a testament to your resilience, your capacity to love, and your ability to navigate life's complexities. It won't be easy, but who knows? The next chapter might just be your best one yet. Keep the faith!