Do you believe in the attachment theory in how attachment styles affect how we date, love, and receive love?

Question

Chazmatazz269 · Accepted Answer

Whether or not i believe in yet another soft science explanation for why people behave the way they do is irrelevant. What is most important is how that information is used to help or hurt people.
My experience suggests jibber jabber about “attachment styles” and “love languages” gives unscrupulous people, mostly women, justification for their bad behaviors. It’s okay that she abused him, their attachment styles weren’t compatible. It’s not her fault that she cheated, their love languages didn’t translate.
A few generations ago people stayed married for life, through thick and thin; for better or for worse. They WORKED through the good and bad, together. If all this “science” was helping people make meaningful connections and work through their low moments together, i’d be in favor. It’s not. So it’s hokum as far as i’m concerned. Divorce rates are at their highest, and women initiate divorce more than twice as often as men. Marriage and childbirth rates are at their lowest rates in a century. You’d think knowing as much as we think we know would have the opposite effect. Unless it’s all just rhetoric.

SteveSmith1985 · Accepted Answer

No, I do not believe in this. It just doesn't seem to be a useful paradigm to understand people (for me, personally). It simply does not align with my own understanding of how people work when it comes to love dating etc.

I'm not saying that it's worthless, or that you shouldn't believe in this (if you find it helpful). But, no, I do not believe this.

FreyaRed · Accepted Answer

Attachment is mutual thing, as far as you're such vain narcissist who doesn't see anything with exception of their ego. You can do only as much your partner allows it. Much more important is according to three personality theory if desires of the child inside you are similar to desires of the child inside your partner. In case of cross transaction or in other words desire conflict, you attachment type is irrelevant because it's just superficial game. In reality you just lose desire to spend time with this particular partner or/and vice versa.

Simslover92 · Accepted Answer

Yes, attachment theory is widely supported by psychological research and is a powerful framework for understanding how people behave in relationships—how they date, love, and receive love.

My therapist pointed out how I have the anxious attachment style and helped me become more secure.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Absolutely, darling! Attachment theory can play a huge role in our love lives. It's like the backstage crew influencing how we connect, lovebomb, or even ghost each other. Secure, anxious, avoidant—these styles can either harmonize or create a roller coaster in relationships. Spotting these can help you navigate a smoother ride to dreamy romance town! 😉💕

Do you want more guidance on your dating journey? Let's make it less of a bumpy ride!

Rosexøxø · Answer

I think it’s worth considering, but I wouldn’t make complete judgements and decisions on that alone. I’d consider lots of other factors like personality, exceptional factors, the individual person (individuality), and their set of circumstances growing up and how that maybe shaped them as a person. I’d consider all of those, but for the most part, I don’t see any reason not to put some dependency on the attachment style theory and list. It seems like reliable information.

rtj1211 · Answer

Much of how people love replicates how they were loved growing up. Many people with relationship/love challenges simply were not loved growing up. Orphans in orphanages. Children taken into care. Children bullied by a parent, by a sibling. Children neglected by the same.

If you miss out on that stuff you are in effect, in that area of life, still a child seeking a parent/family member to supply that which didn't happen first time round.

Some are still waiting for doses of praise, encouragement, trust, affirmation. Some are waiting for a man to protect them from harm. Some are waiting to be treated as adults, not protected like little children. Etc etc.

In all cases, they will not react 'normally' to certain manifestations of love.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

A little. And also not at all. Not at all when it is used to predict profiles  at the expense of  individual complexity. Not at all when it is used by popular psychology Not at all when it is used for self-labeling

Effably · Answer

Mostly, yes.

Reality is that it is just a common categotization and understanding things often requires an assumption or framework. This works just fine. I would consider it about the same I would any diagnosis. Good for a general idea, not enough for any in-depth understanding. Knowing where to start is still immensely useful.

Geo1970 · Answer

In theory it used to be the norm and most orthodox approach.

However, in the world in which we live in today that is not the case.

Tenuous problems, however extreme or not, are much more prevalent and because of these situations arising, divorce rates are increasing, so our tolerance towards each other is on a rollercoaster ride downwards!

ArrowheadSW · Answer

I think it is a "way of explaining", and ultimately can apply to people's relationships as a way of "navigating through issues" in many but not all cases. I think it is useful but not a cure-all.

drdrey · Answer

Actually I met a girl 8 months ago. We spent time together though she had and has a boyfriend till date. She's super special to me. I am so attached to her that I can't imagine her leaving me even if we are best friends. She is my charm my ego everything.

Really I never imagined I could get attached to someone that bad. We laughed together we shared same food in college we used to go everywhere together just we both ( because her boyfriend was in other city)

bddddd · Answer

Umm... there is a good deal of evidence that secure attachment in childhood is important for development. I can send you a lot of articles. Is that what you mean?

Nikki1989 · Answer

Yes, it is widely accepted within the fields of developmental psychology, clinical psychology, and social psychology.

Staximus · Answer

Yes and no, I think it applies to certain situations and certain people but I don't think it applies to everybody

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know anything about attachment theory.

lightbulb27 · Answer

don't know enough about it.

beenherebefore · Answer

Yes, it makes perfect sense to me.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Never heard of it.

Anonymous · Answer

It boils down to biology.

PaleDale · Answer

Yes, and I know my type

Sam1133 · Answer

No maam I live in real world not in la la land.

HelpfulGirlll · Answer

Nope

Cherrysherrylady · Answer

It's bs

Do you believe in the attachment theory in how attachment styles affect how we date, love, and receive love?

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