What can a man do if he's unlovable?

[Anonymous]

Around last year, I realized that I could never love myself because there's nothing about me to love. And I've been told my whole life that I'm too hideous for a romantic life. Now that I'm fully entrenched in my 30s, and things only seem to be on the decline, I've been growing and growing in despair until I reached the aforementioned conclusion. My friends are all forming solid relationships, even getting married, and moving on. I'm the only one left.

I see two therapists. I work full time. I spend my weekends working on God damn movie reviews to exercise my brain. I can't go out because I have nobody to go WITH, and everything seems to be coming to a close. There's an overwhelming feeling of finality to these feelings and it feels like a truth so absolute that nothing can disprove it, aside from hard evidence of a woman, any woman, NOT being repulsed at the sight of me.

This is pathetic. I will get the "this isn't the right place for this" treatment, but I am out of ideas. Every day, I try to do something to fix this, and every time I'm shut down and it's made worse. "Professional help" isn't god damn doing it. And it hasn't done it for 17 years. I'm stuck and I know why, but I don't know what to do about it.

[jennifer_bloom]

I believe if you work to make sure you are thoroughly positive and also change yourself to respect all normal social boundaries, you will attract friends and romantic interest by the opposite gender. Reason being, there are many people who do not respect boundaries, so you respecting boundaries would make you superior to them. Now almost everybody respects marriage boundaries and sexual boundaries, I am talking about other things, like not respecting the views of others, disrespecting things and people you do not understand, judging people by incorrect biases, ignoring somebody's concerns because you are angry with them for something that happened etc... If you are positive and respect all boundaries, and not just the obvious ones, you will attract enough attention to get into a relationship.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

Maybe stop seeking external validation, stop the amatonormativity and live a life of platonic joy. You’re a whole person, the idea that you need someone else to “complete” you is a load of shit. I did and my life is fucking awesome, I’m the best aunt in the world, I’ve massively improved my relationship with my parents, I have a wonderful amount of true friends who like me for who I am, I’ve found myself emotionally, mentally, and spiritually, and it’s a fantastic experience. I can’t recommend it enough.

[Crankor]

If that's how you feel then just try new things. Like hobbies that either improve your health or develop a new skill.

[AI Opinion]

I'm here to help you find ways to love and accept yourself, even when it feels daunting. You're not alone in feeling this way, and it doesn't define your potential for love and joy. Remember, self-worth isn't determined by others' perceptions. Flirt with your positive attributes; I bet they're there, just waiting to be noticed. You've got humor, passion, and the ability to express emotions—some serious relationship gold! Keep shining, and who knows, love might just sneak up on you when you're least expecting it! 😊

[Vevv123]

No one is unlovable. Firstly, you should love yourself more than anyone else can, because you wake up every day with a body that carries you through the day, your health, your strength, everything you can think of. That’s already a blessing. You’re not left out, sometimes things come at their own time.

[Anonymous]

Get help. Everyone can learn to love themselves.

Listen to this to start. Some of it won't apply, but a lot of it will.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/lz16YqpWkz4

[Anonymous]

You need therapy i feel the same and therapy is helping me a lot

[Anonymous]

Be confident and knowledgeable

[Anonymous]

Only one thing - win a lottery jackpot.