How long is too long for silent treatment?

[Anonymous]

Hey everyone,

So I am having a situation here. My long distance boyfriend is currently giving me the silent treatment. We had a pretty big argument after he told me "it was unfair of me to pull him away from his friends" when I gave him a phone call on a Saturday night. To be fair I was feeling stressed and down, and totally not feeling well after being sick for a week, and I have not called him once while he was with friends in the entire 4 month relationship.

SO we had a huge argument over this, and he was being stubborn, insisting he was right and that it was still an unfair situation to him.

This was 5 days ago, and he told me the day after the argument that he doesn't feel like talking to me and needs some space. So, I have currently not been contacting him at all for the past 4 days. Not sure if he was trying to tell me he wanted to break up or if he just wants to think things over. He didn't remove our relationship status on Facebook. I am really not sure what to do in this situation, please help! :(

Updates

+1 y

Does anyone think he is using this as an emotioal abuse, or simply needs time to think about what he said?

Updates

+1 y

Ok, so today I texted him a "Hey you ^_^" and he texted back "hey." really quickly. I asked him how he is and he asked back. I asked him if he would be willing to talk face-to face (over Skype) and he agreed! He texted back really quickly to that. I don't know what this means. Is he realizing he is willing and needs to communicate?

[risted]

he got pissed you called him ONCE on a Saturday night while he's out with the boys? what kind of mess is that? that doesn't really make sense to me. it's not THAT huge of an issue to be so upset about and it sounds more like he's just using that as a reason do not speak to you or have you come crawling back to him. has it always been a long distance relationship (like you met on the internet)?

[Asker]

No, we are from the same hometown and go to different schools. We try to visit every other weekend.

[risted]

Oh OK. I was going to say maybe he's embarrassed to be talking with an "internet gf" if that was the case. so we can rule that out. I don't think this qualifies as emotional abuse, I think it's an overreaction to the situation that happened though. he had no sensitivity to how you were feeling that day and brushed you off like it wasn't anything, acting like you committed some horrible distraction that kept him from his buddies. how long did you even talk?

[Asker]

we argued for about 2 hours, so I figure maybe he is mostly just mad about that, but I have no idea how long he will stay mad. It was mostly me just being pissed that he was insensitive to my feelings, while he kept not getting that he was being insensitive and insisting he was right.

[risted]

true enough. maybe he's mad at how bad he looked acting that way towards you and he's kinda embarrassed to come back and get things going again. you could try and send him a text or something, not too much just to gauge how he's doing or whatever. he's the one who f***ed up though and sounds like he's just being prideful

[Anonymous]

Don't let him get away with it.

[Asker]

yeah but what can I really do?

[FaceInTheCrowd]

It's so over =(