Which do you think is worse, murder or rape?

[Anonymous]

Murder

Rape

Updates

+1 y

This was the influence for this question.

https://youtu.be/qnFiVqgwa_s

[tartaarsaus]

Hmmm if someone gets raped, this will in probability have really bad impact on their life regarding their well-being, how they view themselves and more. Basically, it would be extraordinarily terrible for their entire life (especially if access to counseling or quality is poor).


Murder also obviously may ruin the life of the people who are especially close to the victim. Also, why did the person get murdered?


I’m quite sure this externality on people around the victim would also occur with rape. That said, I’m not sure how it compares. I suppose it could be significantly less harmful for them in the case of rape given that a person was not just violently eliminated. However, if that rape victim also becomes suicidal, acts completely differently and that sort of stuff, they’d also be ripped out of their normal life as people close know him/her.


Then it also becomes a matter in how we define “worse”. Do we care for people around them or predominantly the first victim of the crime itself? That will also depend on the relationship of the victim of the crime to others.


Furthermore, do we only care about the heinousness of the crime or also tangible consequences for people?


I think it depends too much on quite a few things, such as inter-personal relationships, damage suffered by rape, defining “worse” and that sort of stuff.


If we define worst as heinousness of the crime, murder. But if we take in account tangible consequences for people, there could be other factors that make either worse than the other in actual impact.

[tartaarsaus]

That said, I fully realize that rape to me has more the perception of a distant crime, which would impact how I perceive the shittiness of the crime. Like I don’t know anyone who has been raped let alone sexually harassed, and certainly not me.

Murder, on the other hand, just has less impact on the individual, because they just were killed. However, if the consequences on the individual of rape are extremely large, and this perception is likely affected by it being a distant crime to me, then this could probably shift the goal posts on how heinous something is.

[tartaarsaus]

Ah another thing I thought of.

Murder could be considered to be worse because you eliminate someone thus depriving that person of what could have been.

[OlderAndWiser]

Strictly on the basis of logic, most men will say that murder is worse because a rape victim has the opportunity to recover from the traumas whole the victim obviously does not.

However, as a man, I can't fathom what it is like for a woman to be raped. I think that most women will respond to this question on the basis of emotion, not logic, and say that rape is worse. But if you post a poll:. Rape victims, would you have preferred to have been murdered when you were raped, I would expect most would answer "no."

Rape and murder are both horrendous and I don't really think there is much to be gained by trying to decide which is worse.

[devilish-cutie]

It isn't emotinal to choose rape lol. It js logical too and plenty gave arguments. Some would rather die than live with that. What calue is life if you know it will be torture might as well rather not be. Life is also in many ways pointless since we will all die eventualy. Death is invitable, rape however isn't.

[ThisDudeHere]

@devilish-cutie the value of a tortured life is the prospect of overcoming the torture.

[19magic]

Depends what kind of each your referring to, there's what people to believe to be murder is more of a nice thing, and same with rape nowadays people say rape is all kinds of things despite being into it. I remember reading about this girl who had a hook up in a bar, who then said she was raped and underage, despite faking age to get into bar leaving guy to assume she was legal by the way in court she was found guilty and him innocent.

But in turn of full on rape and murder then I'd say murder is worse as sure your dead and you can never achieve what you wanted to or be who you want. Then you got to think of everyone your connected to and how they're going to feel, your children, parents, siblings, friends, aunt/uncles, grandparents. Sure all these people would still be effected if you were raped but not quite in the same way. So murder for sure

[BreakingSound]

I personally know people who think otherwise, but objectively, I don't even see how this is even arguable.

Rape, while being a horrible, world-destroying violation that you carry your entire life, still leaves you with a life to live. You can still go on to live in relative normalcy. There will even be times that you forget it ever happened, and you can still experience happiness, joy, in other things in life.

If you're murdered, though, that's it. Everything has been taken from you. You have ceased to exist. There is nothing for you to carry your entire life because it has been extinguished.

How can rape, impossibly bad as it is, possibly be worse than that?

[TheLawAroundHere]

I've been a type 1 diabetic for 30 years. Bilateral below the knee amputee. Nerve damage out the ass. Death doesn't hurt. I've been dead. Dying hurts.

I can't even wrap my brain around the idea of rape. I mean, jesus christ. When my wife had her iud in, i bumped it one time. I lost my boner so god damned fast that it wasn't funny. How anyone can commit that heinous act.

The problem with torture is that, if done properly, you dont die because of it. It makes you wish you were dead.

This might be obscure. So check youtube if need be. Remember the "Under Siege"? The crew was being moved into a containment area. One of the sailors jumped one of the bad guys. The bad guy recovered his weapon and shot the sailor. Tommy Lee Jones then pulls his pistol to shoot another guy. He then says "Know this. Defy us and I will shoot you and the man next to you." That is a prime example of murder being used as a torture method. Sure, you die. But knowing your buddy will join you in 10 seconds would have to suck ass.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Rape is over rated. I have been raped, I have nearly been killed as well (stabbed in the head), I'll take the rape over being dead any day. People who think rape is worse have never actually had to face their own mortality, its like asking whether or not its worse to lose a pinky, or your entire arm, their is in fact a right answer to that and its not the pinky.

That doesn't mean rape is good by any means, but on the list of bad things to happen, its not that high on the list. Any one who says it is has lived a very chushy life and/or has no imagination.

[Saturnxox]

Rape is a very scary thing.
You realise how small you are and how you have no power at all. People can do whatever they want with your body and you have nothing to say about it.
Then you start to wonder. Was it my fault? Did I lead him on? What was I wearing? What face expression did I have? Did he think I wanted to have sex?
And it is really tough time. I'm not sure if you ever really get over it..
When you're killed you don't have to deal with all of this trauma.
So they're both bad. It is really hard to say that ang of them is worse.
But I guess when you get raped you are still alive, if you're killed you lose everything and it harms everyone who loved you.
So murder is worse I think.

[KrakenAttackin]

So is getting your ass kicked, which is something plenty of men go through but we don't whine about it to everyone.

[Saturnxox]

I don't whine about it either. Not many people know about it, but it happend. Still gives me anxiety when I go out. But it's fine. I'm alive.

[Liz_thorne]

I don't think that one is worse than the other. However there are instances where murder could be justified i. e. if you kill someone to save your own life or the life of a close one. That can't be said for rape.

[Liz_thorne]

I think what @Quackthulu said is also really worthwhile. Rape is a very real almost daily threat to women. So obviously it's the thing we're worrying about more.

[KrakenAttackin]

Both genders have plenty of daily threats. Women do not have the market cornered on fear, you just whine about it constantly.

[Liz_thorne]

I never suggested that. I said rape is more of a threat for us than it is for men and implied that could explain the differences in votes

[MCheetah]

Can't vote on it. One is potential lifelong psychological abuse and the other is literal death. It's like asking would you rather be shot in the head or tortured for several years.

This assuming it's actual, legitimate rape and not the SJW bullsh*t version of "rape" in that, "she had a beer or two, so all of her accountability as an adult goes out the window, unless she's behind the wheel of a car" or "she didn't like the sex and didn't verbally utter a literal 'yes,' to the guy but gave clear physical ques for acceptable, but it's "rape" anyway. If you're talking about actual rape, and not third-wave feminist "rape," then yes, that's psychological torture and in some cases, it'd almost be more humane to just kill the person.

[Aguysopinion4799]

Well... They are both terrible acts, but I would say the worst of the two is Murder.

My reasoning is pretty much the same as with @JosyJosy who said because they would be dead.

While it is obvious that rape is a horrible crime, often causing the victim to have psychological trauma afterwards and many other terrible results afterwards, there is still the fact that the person is alive and has the opportunity to recover from that trauma and live on.

I am not saying rape has not caused death, there are cases of rape victims who have taken their own lives because it caused too much psychological damage to them.

My point is that with murder, that's it, you're dead and there is nothing else, with rape you have the possibility however small it is, to recover from it and even get the criminal in jail.

My heart goes out to victims of both these crimes

[jgokgotit]

I believe rape is worse. Both crimes affect the victim's family as well as the victims themselves. However, in the case of murder, the victim is not suffering anymore (unless they did not get right with Jesus, but for this question, we will stick to this life). In the case of rape, the victim is living and has to navigate through the pain and might, in some cases, have to endure contact with their rapist and maybe even watching the asswipe go free. The one thing that I would say might make murder worse is if the victim's family cannot find the body because then the family holds a false hope of finding their loved one while the rape victim is around to mention what happened.

[AzureGirl]

I’m leaning towards rape. With murder you have a murderer and an obviously dead victim. With rape the victim is alive and not only has to deal with legal issues such as charging the rapist and trying to convict them should they (hopefully) go that route, they also have to deal with mental trauma, possible emotional trauma, possibility of pregnancy, physical wounds/trauma, etc.

[KrakenAttackin]

@AzureGirl What is your definition of "rape"?

[AzureGirl]

Sex without consent.

[KrakenAttackin]

What if there is consent but regret the next morning, is that rape?

[AzureGirl]

No, that’s regretting your actions.

[Ellie-V]

I’ve been lucky enough to never have been raped but as a sexual assault survivor I would have chosen to die than to be violated and left with scars that I’m somehow responsible for when I didn’t do anything.

[G3tAClue]

As a former rape victim, I still say murder is worse. I was able to mentally recovery from my trauma. Yes, it took years to not be afraid of my own shadow, but at least I’m not dead. I wouldn’t ever wish to be dead either after what I have been through.


Murder is worse, period.

[Alivegirlll]

Death is irreversible and the end. If the first option is death, I don't even need to listen to choose the second option since survival is one of the main purposes of human life.

We cannot ignore the physical and mental effects of rape (and all other crimes) but there is always a reason to live.

I think the idea that being a victim of rape is worse than being dead is related to the mentality of honor killing.

[Jayrock24w]

Rape because not only does that person get dangerously hurt physically but they have to live the rest of their life mentally scared and always watching their back almost paranoid.

[KrakenAttackin]

This is absurd.

[Jayrock24w]

How?

[Clayaya]

Of course men are disliking this

[Jayrock24w]

Because they dont kno how it feels, its the most horrible vivid feeling anyone would experience

[KrakenAttackin]

@Clayaya @jayrock24w Get over yourselves. Men get their asses kicked, get murdered, get humiliated publicly, get thrown in prison, become homeless; all at rates MUCH higher than women. I would submit all of the above are worse than rape.

[Jayrock24w]

U kno what when u get raped or or any of the above then come back, cuz being held down forcefully by an older much older man as they force their way inside of you especially when ur a virgin is like hell, i wish he had killed me instead have me replay that in my mind everyday and having nightmares every night. Its horrifying

[Clayaya]

@KrakenAttackin You’d rather be raped in the ass than being homeless or beaten? None of that shit matters because you most likely got yourself in that position. If you’re homeless it’s because you aren’t on top of your shit. For humiliation sticks & stones dude & for being beaten you probably got yourself in that position. Most people don’t get beaten for no damn reason. Rape is completely against someone’s will. & Women go through all those very same things you mentioned everyday.

[KrakenAttackin]

@Clayaya In California if a man and woman have been drinking and decide to have consensual sex, she can wake up the next morning and decide she was "raped" as she was "intoxicated" the night before. So, she wakes up, "remembers" she has a husband or boyfriend and has the man charged with rape. I am sorry, but feminist have DESTROYED what rape really is. To me, rape is a man forcibly attacking a woman physically and forcing her to have sexual intercourse without her consent at any point.

[Clayaya]

@KrakenAttackin well avoid any situation where you can be accused. Simple

[KrakenAttackin]

@Clayaya "Simple". One would think verbal consent IS avoiding a situation where you could be accused, but not she can RETROACTIVELY rescind her consent. This makes sense to you? Wait, I am asking a woman... don't bother replying.

[David_Kek]

Doesn't that mean it's humanitarian to euthanize rape victims?

[KrakenAttackin]

@David_Kek Bingo. No man should EVER date a girl who claims she was raped.

[David_Kek]

@KrakenAttackin There's nothing wrong dating rape victims, while everything wrong dating immature people with victim mentalities.
If they can't even help themselves by seeing themselves as an agent that acts on their own life and the world around them, then what good are they to anyone else? You can't depend on someone who can't even depend on themselves.

[KrakenAttackin]

GTF over it.

[Jayrock24w]

Lol why you'll still talking bout this.

[FR_Ruby]

Well murder might be a consequence for something. Rape never has a good reason & creates lives that are either cut short or lived without a parent and with less love. Also, murdering a rapist is actually a positive thing so Rape is worse. Besides, I'd rather be dead than to create a ruined life.

[Twinrova]

Imagine actually answering "rape" for this question. Would you rather someone you love be raped or murdered? Well, if you want to see them again, I'd assume the former.

Don't just ask yourself what you'd rather happen to you, ask also about how this will effect other people in your life.

[Quackthulu]

Rape, without a doubt. If someone gets murdered their life is over, end of story. If someone gets raped third life is ruined but they are still alive, and empty shell of what the my used to be.

[Asker]

I understand and respect your opinion, but don’t you think people are more resilient and tougher than you think? Yes, I’m sure the specific circumstances of the rape will affect a person differently than other circumstances, AND I think some people just respond to rape differently, more drastically, traumatically, etc. Perhaps for the majority of people, I’m just guessing, rape is something that will linger in their minds for a long time and perhaps never go away. Nonetheless, these people can get better and move on from the rape they’ve experienced even though they may never forget it, it doesn’t affect them remembering it, to the same extent as when the wounds were more fresh.

Murder, well, there’s no getting past that. What you could’ve been is gone, possible lovers gone, possible accomplishments gone, etc. You as a human/person/identity is gone. Not to mention, the moments before murder can be the most physically visceral, traumatic, and painful experience one can face.

[Levin]

I do know someone who was raped. Despite the trauma she has suffered, now she is flourishing.

[Asker]

@Levin
Also, people just respond and react differently to being raped. Some “recover” lickety split, not a huge deal, while others are forever depressed, traumatized, and have a hard time navigating the world. The specific persons involved and specific instances of the rape matter.

Everyone dies when murdered lol...

[Levin]

Yeah, to be fair, even those that flourish are probably going to experience at least 5 years of hell working through it. I don't think there's that many who can brush it off. It's just a question of whether someone can work through it. Experiencing suffering can be the making of us. But it's quite a suffering to go through! Then again, none of us can escape experiencing horrific things and trauma. Bereavement, extreme illness, cancer treatment, extreme violence etc.

[Quackthulu]

Sure, recovery is possible, but it takes years at least. And it still leaves a scar, it's never the same. Death is just death, it's nothingness. No pain, not depression, on blaming yourself, no listening to people tell you it will be okay when they clearly have no idea how the fuck you are actually feeling. Why do you think so many rape victims commit, or at least try to commit suicide? Because sometimes death is actually better.

[Asker]

@Quackthulu Well, I don’t think people are being honest about death lol. People think it’s just an eternal sleep, taking away all your fears and pains and in the moment of your pain and suffering, death sounds like a good alternative.

But, no one knows the content of death.
Maybe it’s several times worse than life.
Who knows?

@Levin
Yeah, I can agree with that. For me though, if I got raped, I’d brush it off rather quickly. Again, this is just ME. I’m not normal in a lot of things. I’d feel dirty and get checked by a doctor to make sure I’m okay and don’t have any permanent damage, but aside from that, I’d move on from it quickly. I probably won’t forget about it, but it’s not something that would bother me for any long period of time.

[Quackthulu]

Everyone who is alive knows what is like to not be alive. Because there was a time before we were born.

[Asker]

@Quackthulu

Well, yes, there was but I don’t think people really remember how that felt or was lmao.

[Quackthulu]

That's the point.

[Levin]

I don't think it's *insert hot celebrity* or your hot professor that is going to do the raping.

It's probably going to be some African American bruiser with a horse cock. Male on male rape seems particularly horrific and emasculating. Just warning you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtxK7wNUBPk

[Asker]

@Quackthulu
Well, what if death is different?

Or what if that moment before life was actually unpleasant and bad but we forgot it upon coming into being? Then once we die, we live it again and it’s “eternal”

There’s literally millions of interpretations on this.

I think naturally, people WANT to end their pain and suffering, whatever it is, so they think death/suicide is the best based upon their suffering and what they know about death. If I told them that death is an eternal fiery hell where you get raped endlessly, then they’d consider not dying/suicide.

[Asker]

@Levin
I think it would just be disrespecting and dirty for ME personally. Those would be my main gripes with it. If there’s stabbing or other abuse then that’s different. I’d be more worried about stabbing, beating, etc.
Emasculating? No, I personally wouldn’t care about that for ME. I’m pretty secure in my person/manliness, so something that someone tries to do to demean me as a man never bothers me. These types of things have happened before in my life quite a few times and they never bother me. I get over them.

Although, I can see how rape would affect women more intensely, from a biological and emotional perspective

[Quackthulu]

You are making up a lot of arbitrary "what if" shit here. Not really sure if you just don't understand how horrific rape actually is, or if you are just afraid of death.

[Asker]

@Quackthulu

All I’ve ever said is that everyone is affected differently by rape. Some people bounce back like no big deal and some never bounce back, kill themselves, get depressed, etc.

Both are bad.

[Quackthulu]

Nobody bounces back like it's no big deal. They might act like they have while inside if is tearing them apart.

[Asker]

There’s perhaps millions upon millions of people that have been raped since our existence... You really think everyone of these has the same experience with rape? No.

Again, circumstances do matter. So, I can easily create an instance where it’s the worst possible thing for someone, but even then everyone’s willpower, ego, resiliency, etc. are all different.

[Quackthulu]

Millions of people have died too. What's your point?

Have you ever been raped? Have you ever died?

Then shut the fuck up and stop acting like you know what you are talking about. This isn't some god damn hypothetical situation here.

[Asker]

@Quackthulu
That’s okay, I get that this bothers you a lot.

Again, all I’ve ever said is that this is different for everyone and circumstances matter.

[Quackthulu]

No, you don't get shit.

[Asker]

@Quackthulu
Well, I’ll let our dialogue speak for itself. I’ll see myself out, as I think I’m just going to unintentionally fan the flames

[Quackthulu]

That's the smartest thing you have said all day.

[Levin]

I don't think you can trivialise someone's trauma or say that you could deal with something unless you've been in those shoes. Theoretically, all of us can live with something. While inwardly, it's eating us up.

[KingdomForAKiss]

I think rape is worse for the victim and murder is worse for those that are still living.

Those that have been unaffected by either are just guessing.

In the case of rape, there is still a chance for the person to go on living and the pursuit of happiness.

[Asker]

Well, unless the victim doesn’t want to breathe anymore... murder is pretty bad for the victim lmao...

[KingdomForAKiss]

Obviously, yes. What I meant is that I think murder has a deeper effect on those that cared about the victim. Yes, people care about rape victims but the outreach, for lack of a better word, is different.

[Apple1996]

For the victim rape is worse since they have to recover after and try to go on a live a normal life. at least with murder after that they don't have to suffer anymore once they're dead.

[KrakenAttackin]

But yet you will ride the cock carousel for a decade, but rape is worse than death? Another reason to not take women seriously.

[Apple1996]

@KrakenAttackin lol wow yeah sure I'll willingly have sex if that's what I choose to do but that is not comparable to rape at all.
If you were a women I think youd understand this question a little better. It seems hard for men to fully understand the pain and long term mental damage that rape causes. Women that have been raped are 10x more likely to commit suicide so obviously if they are taking their own lives because they were raped I think a lot of then would have chosen to die then be raped in the first place.

[KrakenAttackin]

Do people willing get their asses beaten? Become homeless?

[RateThemBabe]

Well think of it this way: most people would think death as an “easy way out” and would much rather die than be tortured. Rape is a form of torture sometimes. So I’d much rather be murdered than raped. Therefore I think rape is worse in a way.

[cheapshotbob]

murder because murder can be slow and painful and never ending , rape isn't because the guy who does can't last more than a minute or 2 and has to use some tools too finish what he can't. and while that might last longer it is not the same though the self diluted guy might think it will. what a looser he is XD

[matchrestore]

Murder is final, rape can potentially be recovered from. I in no means want to discount the drama imposed by rape. Rape is no doubt abhorrent, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, even my worst enemies, but forced to chose between the two I'd say rape is the lesser of two evils.