I JUST talked to my crush. YES I approached him but. . . .

[Anonymous]

I just talked to my crush (YES I walked up to him and initiated the conversation) but when I was talking I felt that he was not interested for some reason. I mean he kept the convo up we made eye contact a couple days earlier (he didn't approach but stared -initial interest I took it) but when he was talking he would look make eye contact for like a second and kept looking away.

He seemed really sweet and nice. I think he just kept convo to be nice. I don't even know if there was a connection.

How would I know? What do you think?

Updates

+1 y

Guys. . . . any educated guesses on this subject?

[ArtistBboy]

With the fact that he was making eye contact, but for a majority he was looking away, that indicates that he was nervous. Being nervous is a good sign that he's interested in you but isn't completely comfortable yet, which is still a definition of attraction.

The fact that he was sweet and nice reinforces the guess above.. Most sweet/nice men are nervous (not all, but most are).

As for your guess that he was just trying to be nice.. That's nothing to be alarmed about because you've already made the assumption that he's sweet and nice.

My thoughts: You made the right move by approaching him, but I doubt his insecurity (being nervous) will break anytime soon. If you keep showing him your interest, and you hold a lot of patience with him, then you'll see a good outcome (maybe you guys get together, maybe something else)... And lastly, if you hold no patience for his nervous behavior - yet you are interested - he probably won't break this habit - which will only annoy you in the long run.

So it's your choice, if you like him - be patient with him.. But if you think you'd have better luck elsewhere - move on.

~ ArtistBBoy

[Mesonfielde]

Man, I sometimes wonder how your advices are as great as they are every single time.

[ArtistBboy]

Haha thanks man.. All I can say is that it takes patience, pain, and ambition to learn.

[Asker]

Okay I mean I am willing to patient. I just thought to keep thinking "oh he likes me he's just nervous so I'll just keep talking!11!" when really he's nowhere near interested would probably do my harm than good on my part. Y'know I didn't want to be in denial that I was really a irritant to him.

[ArtistBboy]

For sure, I wasn't blaming you at all - I've done the same thing.

[Anonymous]

That's just one time scenario, don't get hung up on it.

Remember most guys, ESPECIALLY young guys are not good at all at picking up girls signals. He may have no idea you like him.

When I was in college I couldn't believe how many opportunities I missed with girls who liked me (some of them were hot too). In fact if you are pretty...he may feel intimidated.

So here is the best way to go about it. SMILE at him...ALOT. Say how are you...laugh at his jokes. Ask him questions...with responses to are asking you questions.

Just take things one step at a time. He will get the hint.

If he seems shy DO NOT get turned off. Shyness is not always synonymous with lack of confidence. He will warm up to you.

[helperr]

If you automatically had a connection you wouldn't have to ask because if you have an immediate connection your conversation never ends and it just naturally flows. There would be no need for you to think up a topic it would come naturally.

I suggest you let him do some leg work if it's to work otherwise you will end up looking desperarte.

At the end of the day it your choice and I hope I've helped even in the littlest way :)

helperr

[Anonymous]

i think you should follow your instincts on this one. if you feel like something was missing, then there probably was something missing. A connection should be really obvious from the start. If not, then there wans't one. But that doesn't mean he's not interested because interest can grow over time. There just wasn't that initial spark

[foolycooly1001]

this doesn't make sense. she already is attracted to him. why does she need a spark?

[foolycooly1001]

i mean, if this is what a spark is, you are never going to get a spark from a shy guy.

[Opinion Owner]

she's attracted to him. but he might not be attracted to her. a relationship is a 2 way street. If she doesn't feel a connection FROM him, then there probably isn't one on his part, not hers

[Asker]

Yeah I agree with Anonymous User. Believe me I already was so interested in him but when we were talking it was unrequited so to speak, like I felt I was the only one talking that cared to try and make a conversation happen.

[Anonymous]

I am in the same exact situation. I don't really know what to tell you. But, keep talking to him. See where that goes.

For me, I have kind of given up on my crush. I mean, I'm really attracted to him, but when I talk to him, I don't really feel anything. I don't get butterflies or I don't feel any sparks. Is that how you feel?

[Asker]

"I don't get butterflies or I don't feel any sparks. Is that how you feel?" - Yes, I had more butterflies when I was just admiring from afar to be honest.

[pinkpanties]

he might just be shy, if my crush came up and talked to me I wouldn't be able to maintain eye contact either

[23tdmoss]

ur hot

[Anonymous]

Sounds like he was really nervous. Felt pressured. I recall a long time ago when I was trying to approach a shy girl...never worked. She kept walking away from me. Finally I gave up on her...then she started approaching me! I felt awkward...returned her hello and just kept walking throughout the store. It was just unexpected tension on my part, and I felt pressure to lead on a conversation.

[Asker]

Felt pressure in a bad way? Should I have shown interest in another way or something? Why didn't you talk to the girl if she wanted to talk to you?

[Opinion Owner]

Honestly, I was fed up with her. I sent her flowers, didn't get a call back, then called into the store she was working in, and she just cuss me off. She didn't know it was me, but thought it was some pervert customer. Then I thought..."Okay, she's got a nasty temper. Probably shy for a reason after all." But that was her... It's just awkward, because I was shy as well at the time but I was braving it and she wasn't responding. In a way I was mad at her.

[Asker]

Oh okay. So can you expand on what you meant when you said "felt pressured'?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes. And I didn't do well with shy girls thereafter in my life. THey just didn't commit to a date. Too scared, even though they said yes over the phone. THey just conformed and changed their mind in the end. That why I don't like all that date preparation. Just go for a walk in the park, something casual at first. No fancy clothes. Just like two friends of the same sex taking a stroll. Keep it simple.

[Anonymous]

same thing happen to me with the girl who I have a crush,the person don't know how to act around you so they tend to be nervous or fidgeting things in their hands

if you really like him and he is worth your effort then you need take it slow

just talk to him whenever you see him,dont need to be a long conv just a short conv to make him feel comfortable interacting with you

once he gets familiar and comfortable with you ,he would come out of his shell and things will be much easier

anyways best of luck,i am just stuck in the middle hoping to move it further lol

[swagger]

I would say that he is shy, or has low confidence levels. Regardless of whether you like someone or not confident people maintain eye contact when in conversation.

[swagger]

Should have said that if you like someone then it is more likely to make you look away in some instances so if you have seen him in conversation with other people (females specifically) and he holds their gaze or at least looks at them for long periods then signs would point to him liking you

[Asker]

I mean he makes eye contact with me when I talk just when he talks he looks everywhere else for the most part.

[swagger]

Oh ok... then ADHD?

[Anonymous]

This is actually my case in fact as a guy, except that the girl already has a boyfriend of a couple of weeks, so I don't really understand what's happening as she keeps talking to me, touching me, smiling at me, complimenting me and sometimes laughing for no special reason at what I say, and as a result I just keep the convo to be nice. I'm actually interested and I do like her but she already has a boyfriend, so I'm confused. That's all I can tell if it can help. Otherwise, I guess that he might just be afraid of pushing you away from him if he's not shy and you don't have a boyfriend at the moment.

[boredouttamymind]

he does sound really shy... just keep tyring hell maybe you should just ask him out... ever think about tha?

[Asker]

Idk maybe he was but all that aside I already made the first move if he doesn't even really show signs of interest why would I push a thing such as asking him out? I'm going to need some type of reciprocation. It took guts for me to even approach him he should do something at the least.

[boredouttamymind]

i understand... but maybe he is in the same shoes you are... maybe he is scared

[WeaponZero]

He sounds really shy. Normal behavior for a shy guy.

[Anonymous]

Girl, you're a girl. Come on, us guys are simple creatures. Show him how much you care for him and no doubt he'll see something wonderful in you and it'll happen!

Keep the faith!

[foolycooly1001]

if he is shy, then it sounds normal.