My girlfriend cuts herself...

Question

yesterday I noticed a cut on her wrist a pretty large one after talking to her for a while she eventually told me she has cut herself before

im really not sure what to do here I think its may be connected to her last boyfriend sent her pictures of him having sex with the girl he was cheating on her with...

i really need some advice here she talks of suicide often latley

confused415 · Accepted Answer

I think you need to take her sighs very seriously. Often times, people who commit suicide have shown signs much earlier and have left traces of help.

With her signs of cutting herself and speaking of suicide, you must take this must seriously than it appears. Clearly with her ex sending her photos of his current romances with another girl has left her distraught, enough to make her begin to cut herself and speak of suicide.

Please, I urge you to not take this upon yourself and to contact those closest to her, as well as outside professional help. There are many helpful websites and phone numbers you may call, even as anonymous, about suicide and what you may do to help. Many of these offer confidential help if you would rather remain anonymous.

I know this is a lot to ask and I commend you for finding help. Please, find the necessary help before it is too late. I know you must love her and would love the best for her, but often in these situations it is very difficult to handle it yourself. Please contact her family, your school, counselors, as well as anyone else you see fitting. If you would like, you may tell her friends as well, but please tell adults before anyone.

Here is a list of helpful websites I found, I hope this is of help:

link

Please, do not wait until it is too late. Find the proper help and notify any one you can, even if it is your own parents of hers. Best of luck!

YobootyStank · Accepted Answer

although I would never admit this in real life, I was very emotional too when I was a freshman in highschool. It started because I just starting going out with this guy who I was completely in love with (first love) and then found out I had to move, not that far though more like a 20 min drive but I was so use to seeing him everyday. I was at a new school where I felt like I didn't belong and always fought with my mother and always had fights with the boyfriend which lead me to become really depresses and cut myself. one day she found out and she brought me to my school which I thought was a really dumb move and tried to get this guidance counselor to talk to me, talking to her was no help because it didn't seem like the lady didn't give a f*** about my problems really and I was angry at the fact that my mother would make some random lady talk to me when she could have been there to support me herself but no she didn't

my advice to you is to just really be there for her and support her but don't push her to tell you her problems if she isn't comfortable telling you them. eventually she will tell you if she feels like she can trust you. there is also a lot of support groups if she doesn't feel talking to a therapist

im sorry, I hope I helped :(

Cailleach · Accepted Answer

I have friends who are the same, only now they don't cut anymore. Anyway, just tell her how much you care for her and tell her that you don't want to see her hurt herself, as it makes you worry and upset. Tell her that you love her (only if you do) and that she doesn't deserve to feel like sh*t because of what that asshole did to her. Tell her that your there for her etc etc.

Tell her that she doesn't need to cut herself, but you’re not going to judge her or tell her that it’s wrong. Tell her that she is beautiful and that she doesn't need to ruin that beauty by cutting and scarring herself. Tell her to think about her future self. How much she's going to hate herself and her scars. How ugly she will feel just because some unimportant asshole made her feel terrible. Tell her that she has you now and that she doesn't need that asshole and doesn't need to feel bad because of that asshole.

KarKingJack · Accepted Answer

Awh man. I've got a very close friend like this. She might be suicidal, in which case, you gotta watch out man. Like, my friend, I must have stopped her from dyeing about 6 or seven times, y'know, by getting her to the hospital for a stomach pump or forcing her not to do something. All you can do is be there for her.There's clearly a lot of pain in here life, and some extenuating mental problems, y'know. Be there for her, let her talk about it, and discourage self-harm and suicide, but don't be patronising about it or make her feel guilty, y'know. Which requires some level of skill.

I'm sure there's more to it than her last boyfriend doing that, but it could be an element. You should kick his ass, hahaha. Anyway, good luck. You'll get used to dealing with it and helping her out at some point, if your prepared to. A friend of mine was with a girl who was really f***ing suicidal, and something of an urban gypsy - like, he'd have to go looking for her if he wanted to see her, 'cos she'd be cruising and sleeping out under a tree, or something - but they were happy as sh*t.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

The first step is to remove her ex from her life. Block and remove him from any websites/messenger programs and setup a filter on her email to not accept email from him. Next, considering you are under 18 I have to assume everyone else involved is under 18 as well. If this is the case then you can give his "sex photos" to the police and he can be charged with making/distributing child p*rnography if the girl he's with in the photos is under the legal age to appear in p*rnography where you are (often something like 18). I can guarantee doing that will stop him from trying to send anything in the future.

In terms of her cutting herself I don't have any experience with this but I suggest you call one of the free teen hotline numbers and ask them for advice. If you're unsure of who you can call post your city or country and I can google it for you. These hotlines are anonymous and the people there will have training of what to suggest to help your gf.

Evolution86 · Answer

You need to get her to talk to someone, a counsellor, a social worker, a teacher she trusts, or her parents. I've been through the cutting, it's not something you can just stop sometimes. Sometimes you need someone to help. If there's any adult she trusts, go to that person, and tell them your fears. If they need help, then social workers or other counsellors are probably the best way to go.

But whatever you do, do not wait. It can get so much worse, and if she's not even trying to hide it anymore, she's asking for help, without verbalising it. That's one thing I can say without a doubt, if she isn't hiding the cuts anymore, she knows she needs help, but doesn't know how to ask.

blood-stained-cherry · Answer

hun, just watch out for her, check her for cuts anywherev else. like on her belly her hips her legs ect. those are places my sister cuts so people can't c the cuts. you need to mke sure she knows how much you care and are worried about her. I just ignored what was wrong with m sister and I almost lost her. and always talk to your girlfriend, and help her with her problems...just don't pretend she will be fin cause she might not be.

insanity · Answer

Dude is she really your girlfriend ? WHY THE F*** would she care if her ex sleeps with another girl and sent to her . post the picture he sent her on the internet and sent a link to all his know friends and send him a message payback is a bitch lol. does she even have feelings for you ? then why on earth will she want to kill herself ? . DUDE this is bad RUN while you can . or if your brave make her choose never to let herself down by that guy or you are leaving(its your call) .

Angel116 · Answer

she isn't going to want to go get preoffesional help!

You need to find out if that's the only cut she has gotten if so then you should help her stop and show her you love her and make her forget the other dude but before you assume its because of her ex ask her why does she do it?

I have seen this before, just show her you CARE

WeaponZero · Answer

The only thing YOU can do as an individual is be there for her and push her to seek professional help.  Anything else would either be totally ineffective or make things worse.  And it's important to not allow yourself to become the single thread she's hanging onto for her sanity.  She needs to built a strong support network which you are only a small part of.  If she's putting you into a position where everything is riding on you and your relationship with her, then she's doomed to fail.

Anonymous · Answer

You can't do anything for her except be there. You really need to tell her she needs to seek professional help. She needs to tell a trusted adult (parent, grandparent, aunt uncle, school counselor, coach, some mentor), or even call a hotline. She's cutting because she has some deep, emotional issues and they won't be resolved as long as she's in this current depressed state of self-harm and injury. Get her help.

ShishKabob · Answer

Get professional help.  If you can't find somebody due to cost, you could always do the suicide hotline.   Even you just calling them and asking what to do is 1000X better than coming here and asking.

crystallyn · Answer

i used to be her... but I asked myself am I really over my ex? obiously not if I'm trippen over it...i kno that it hurts her but I thnk she should find new ways to take her anger and frusteration out thts what I did...like in bed perhaps. but I guess all you can do fer now is make her realize how amazing you are and how much she means to you an how hurt you will be if you lost her

M_A_X · Answer

First, find this man, and kick his ass (but don't tell her about it, she doesn't need to suffer anymore), then, just try and let her know that you're there for her and care.

rosekitten · Answer

If the talk of suicide is ever said, then it's an emergency to talk to a. counselor

emileech · Answer

HONESTLY don't even need to read your story just saw the title. cutting yourself is just a way of getting attention...

edeen-julie · Answer

her ex is a f*** with ; get so professional help hunnie :)

Scrimz21 · Answer

tell her to knock it off life ain't worth taking away cause some dude its stupid

My girlfriend cuts herself...

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

My girlfriend cuts herself...

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.