What non sexual things make men feel close to women?

[abra_b]

I know men need sex to feel close, but they also disconnect sex from their feelings unless the feelings are already there. What is it that makes them feel close to women in order to "turn on" their feelings?

[Middleman]

Somebody who's really thoughtful and understands them as a person. Guys as much as gals likes to be 'pampered' and feel that someone is there to receive or support him when he goes home. If you understand mens likes and dislikes ie. what he likes to eat (ie. cook for him), things he likes to do or places he likes to visit it'll go a long way to helping with the relationship.

One way to help bond with guys is videogames/chess/puzzle games. If you can beat him in any of those areas, he will love you very much!

Also doing things that are conducive to the relationship ie. not spending too much of his money; careful with his equipment if you ever get to use it; updating him on your whereabouts; not angry when his family/friends pays a visit. Guys like to know where you are and like to know what is happening in advance when he is with you...he does not like surprises (unless its a special occasion like a birthday/anniversary). Communicating what you plan to do (with him) is important. This also includes inviting friends, and knowing when to invite the right kinds of people over for dinner ie. not inviting the ex's. Guys hate having to deal/face with any former lovers/folks (even though you may be good friends with them) who he sees as a threat and may jeopardise his relationship with you. Whilst some guys do actually get along with a girl's former partners this is a rare occurrence.

Also getting to know his family well. If you can understand the relationship he has with his mother and not feel threatened by it at all, that is also a plus.

[BillDylan]

Trust is the thing you need to pursue. Knowing that no matter what stupid things we do, you'll not reject us. Trust is not something that you can do either, its a give and take experience which takes time to build. Any sense that we'll be rejected, belittled or laughed at makes our emotional sphincters tighten up and you'll have to start again. Such fragile creatures we are.

Never make the mistake that we don't have feelings, showing them is a sign of weakness in every other kind of relationship we experience, socially, academically or our business relationships. I've personally had to consciously cultivate emotions, sometime in my youth I took up the flag of limiting myself, not enjoying things at face value, just always thinking, analyzing. To this day I'm wary of enjoying myself, example, if given a present, just appreciating it for what it is a sign of affection, not thinking so much of what the other person gains by giving me the gift.

[abra_b]

Well said. I wonder ... does it matter to a guy if you trust him? One of the problems I personally have been running into is automatically feeling distrust if I am interested in a guy ... not consciously, but looking back I can see that. I know it annoys a guy, but does it actually hurt his feelings or the chance for a relationship?

[BillDylan]

Distrust in people we wish to trust more or with everything I think is only natural and is bound to be abundant at the beginning of a relationship. But does that hurt a guys feelings? Personally I think not for I believe trust needs to be earned and given by both. Pride and ego take a part in this though, some will expect that initial trust I would imagine without having earned it.

[abra_b]

Sorry to keep bugging you, but you seem to be intelligent and perceptive. What makes a guy even decide to try to trust someone or want to waste emotions on her? Strong physical attraction only? I have no concept of what drives men....

[BillDylan]

Trust is scalar. I trust you to hold my wallet, to know my bank card PIN number, to share an account. All these are different levels of trust, I would think its the personal commitment to a new level of trust that makes them decide to trust the other the same way. I'm comfortable with the idea (the new level trust), I wish to commit to that level, let's see if she is. As for what motivates men to such commitment, that's probably varied. Love, lust, social gain, any number of things.

[DoctorSex]

1) don't bug him wen he's playin on the console

2) fix him up summin 2 eat (always expect your man to be hungry so always have some sort of food offering lol food is the way to a mans heart)

3)suck his d***...OHHHHH yes my bad, non sexual

4)be submissive...no I don't cower down underneath him, wot I mean is let him win the arguement if it makes him feel more of a man to.

5) apologise wen ur in the wrong and don't long out arguements...the longer you long out aruements the sooner he'll fink, f*** dis bitch...im just gona cheat.

6) worry about he's health and saftey...as much as guys front, we love a chick that's worrys about us...shows that you care.

7) lie on his chest in bed...snuggle up under his arm, makes him feel more masculine.

8) don't make him feel awkward that he's not constantly holding your hand and kissin you up in public

9) respect your body and respect the fact that in the male kingdom ur body belongs to your man, don't dress in a way that mite make your man feel like your going out for other reasons that don't consist of having fun with your friends. you don't need to be chatting to any new guys, uve got male friends alredy and you've got a man...end of.

10) Have confidence in yourselve... Walk with Class. nothing makes a guy feel better than when other guys rate nd respect your girl.

follow my 10 commandments and you'll be fine.

lol did this in 1 take aswell...BAM!

reagards from

Doctor Sex

[DeadKennedy]

1) discussions about personal issues that normally wouldn't b brought up around the guys. Knowing you can trust some1 with really personal sutff that would be embarassing if revealed.

2) Spontaneous txts

3) long, warm hugs,

4) hard to explain but you know when some1 does something like apologize for a joke that they otherwise woudlnt or go out pf their way to be sensitive toward you...basically actions that just say "I care about you"

5) Just overall spending time together, esp just being in a place where you can chill out and watch a movie or observe something and just be there with a signifcant other.

6) Feeling wanted and needed

7) sleep together (not having sex I mean)

[bennynthejets]

That they get me without making me express or talk out my feelings. Also, any woman who is not jealous and lets a guy have his time to himself and/or friends. I think women really need to understand that the more leeway they give the right guy, the more love and respect will come back in return. But don't take that as me saying you should let a guy walk all over you.

[WeaponZero]

the most intimate non-sexual experience I can think of is just the two of you curled up on the couch together watching a movie over good delivery pizza.

yeah, lame and cheesy, I know. but I like it. a lot.

[justlovely2009]

Aww. I don't think its chessy at all. :) or chinese food.

[WildVyse]

I like to hold hands, it's one of the most intimate things you could do with someone

[shes-a-lady]

Awwwwww

[Curious-Plumber]

Making a girl laugh, holding hands, curling up together, doing stuff together

[palek]

Handcuffs have proven resilient to this end.

[xallyssa]

Best answer for suuuree lol

[palek]

You're OK! Guess everyone else needs ta lighten up. ; - )

[swagger]

Ah Hah!!! That's brilliant!! Does no one have a sense of humour anymore! Best Answer over here!!! :)

[palek]

I high percentage of us Americans are humor-challenged it seems. Maybe this is why I've learned to get by on Fawlty Tower, and Monty Python reruns.

[EddyMetal]

Feelings? What feelings?

[abra_b]

Bwahahaha. Even Axl Rose (so many dbag qualities you could call him a toolbox) wrote "sweet child of mine" and thought he meant it for a little bit.

[EddyMetal]

Axl Rose was an emo kid. Guns and Roses? Yuck!

[GIntrovert]

For me it's when we do things together.

[varun_k_us]

well a nice charming nature works