Why do girls run away from the nice guys when they always say that's what they want?

Girls always say that they end up with assholes, but when there is a nice guy in front of them they don't know how to react.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Simple solution if you not getting anywhere being nice then switch it up a bit, become a jerk, look women whine, cry, and complain a lot and about the dumbest crap you can think of. So instead of acting like her gay shopping pal, step up your game, and when she whines and cries and complains tell her to stop. Stop being there for her every step of the way who cares, they have other girls to deal with all that emotional crap, if all women wanted was a nice guy in life this whole world would be full of over emotional not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings, guys, thank god the world isn't like that.

    Be a man not a shoulder to cry on, trust me once you stop being their crutch and actually tell them well ya life is full of problems no reason to cry because you can't find the right shoes to go with your dress you will get a lot further with women. Stop being so understanding of them, who cares I don't know why they can't leave the house because their hair doesn't look good, I just tell them wear a hat then, or a put your hair in a pony tail, but if you don't figure it out in about 5 seconds I'm leaving without you.

    A nice guy would say something like no no your hair looks beautiful as it is, but if you really think it's that bad and if you don't want to go then we can just stay here. Notice the difference one guys a jerk about it and mission accomplished she's in the car. The nice guy gets screwed because he let her get her way and now he gets to sit at her house with her while she sits and pouts on how her whole day is ruined and he gets to comfort her.

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    • Wow... reverse psychology.. you know what.. not a bad idea.. but nice guys better remember it pretty fast when theyre in a situation like above..

What Experts Said

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What Girls Said 17

  • okay I hope I'm not too late in answering but I disagree with this concept and what most of the guys answered. I really don't think that the majority of girls really wants a jerk versus a guy who's nice but this is why it seems like it:

    1) people often remember stuff that doesn't make any sense and/or shouldn't happen. girls shouldn't want bad guys/assholes/jerks but some do and because of the ones that do many guys think that most - if not all - girls do.

    2) guys who end up being jerks usually don't seem that way when they're first meeting girls they want to attract because, well, they want to attract them. they seem really cool and friendly until they got them then they show their true colors. unfortunately girls get attached to these guys and so they usually still want to be with them even with their jerkful ways.

    3) nice guys are usually also shy and insecure guys. they hope that the girl they like likes them back, but they have a hard time doing anything about it and wonder why the girl isn't all over them. guys who are jerks are also usually very confident and, thus, easily get girls to fall for them.

    I bet there are other reasons that it seems like girls like jerks versus nice guys but these are the main three that I can think of right now.

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    • I think same is true with nice guys

      some nice guys wind up showing their true colors, after first meeting a girl... that's kinda how the girl I liked wound up, she thought I looked like a nice guy, then she said I was a bad guy, kinda weird eh?

    • I think some guys confuse being "nice" with being a pushover...or even better.... use being "nice" as a way to manipulate a girl or at least that's how she might see it.

  • Cause when your used to bein hurt so much and disappointed, its scary to think you'll ever get treated right because your always let down. Girls like this often feel like they don't deserve better cause every time they've tried, the same old thing keeps happenin then they lose hope and continue to date the shitty guys cause they are used disappointment and anytime your used to something its hard to trust anything else that is different. In other words, a nice guy is a change but if a girl is not used to a nice again, she's afraid of change, afraid of something good happening for her. Also, nice guys are boring. Most, which I don't know y but they usually are and a lot of nice guys are not that attractive. Funny how bad guys are the pretty boys, the athletes and etc type of guys who take care of there physically appearances to attract girls. I guess you can say girls like this rathergo for the looks than how a guy treats them.

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    • See I'm not ugly and have no prbolem getting women..i meet the ones that take advantage of being spoiled and abuse that and basicly create monsters... I be blinded because of my feelings and attatchment then have to let them go so in away I meet the wrong ones lol now that I think about it

    • Well not all nice guys are ugly or really attractive either. Honestly, really handsome guys use there looks to get what they want(women) therfore abuse it because they get greedy and stuck up attitudes treatin women bad. Nice guys finish last. Sry

    • Hhaha tru.. but id rather be last than regret the past

  • They don't actually want a bad boy. They want a combo... a guy that can give them playful attention by teasing them, but still knows how to be respectful about it. Simple as that. They want a balance. The problem is that not many guys know this, and they try to be one or the other, when they should try to have a sweet & sour combo. : )

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  • You have to date all sorts of people before you know what you want; that's true to everyone. The "jerks" know how to manipulate feelings so girls think he's nice, but really, they've just been manipulated. Nice guys don't know how to manipulate feelings so they usually don't get the girls until these girls that got played develop their Bullsh*t meters. The plain and simple truth is that they can't tell they difference. It might be obvious to guys because they dicuss this amoung each other or they hear a girl complain about it, but what guys don't know is that they act the same way around us but with a little extra something (smoothness or, whatever their trick is). Nice guys always end off better in the end though so, don't worry, because while nice guys are having honest relationships with nice girls, the jerks will be alone and unhappy because the only type of woman who wants an aging jerk is a crazy woman who can't get married herself. Hope this helps!

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  • LMAO. This is the way I see guys. I am really nice and I have morals. When a guy finds out how I am he doesn't know how to react except to be a dickhead. So uhm I am just as lost as you are.

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    • Thats shitty I wonder what's happens you got 2 people that are the same way.. Is it magic and to good to be true or a stale mate meaning it won't go anywhere....But don't change there somebody that excepts you for you that's what people keep telling me..

    • People are stupid. End of story.

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What Guys Said 16

  • Maybe the guys who think they are the nice guys aren't nearly as nice as they think they are =/

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  • I can only speculate, but maybe a possible reason is that they're so taken aback by a guy who's not a player, jerk, etc. that they don't know what to make of him, and don't pursue him further. There's also the unfortunate problem of jerks and players generally being better at promoting themselves, whereas a lot of nice guys stay quiet and hope to be noticed. In that case, if a true nice guy can learn to add confidence to his repertoire and put himself out there more, then he should eventually find who's he looking for. Take it from someone who's been there and knows.

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    • I never thought of it like that and makes a lot of sense..

    • No problem, happy to have helped you.

  • Will never understand women *sigh*

    You women always cry out loud how you end up with jerks and how you want a nice guy.

    But after your heart gets broken . . You just do that all over again.

    What is so damn fascinating in ''players'' ? They might be mysterious and bad asses but still treat you bad. . . And you women STILL always fall for them.

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  • It seems to stem as to what confidence is and a guy who is too nice seems like a wuss, pop culture and Darwin have shown that a guy who is strong in character is not a girl hence he becomes someone to be desired like, be cool and hold back on the politeness just be the fantasy women want, as we men want the fantasy of awesome beauty.

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  • trust me, I've had a ton of dating experience and everything that your mom and old girl-friends and the movies taught is bullshit! women LIKE nice guys, but they are not deep down ATTRACTED to nice guys. nice=FREIND ZONE if you were a woman, who would you be attracted to? rick moranis from huney we shrunk the kids.OR george clooney/brad pitt? simple answer. play it cool, BE BUSY, people like busy people=people want what they can't have. be aloof, and I suggest you google "david deangelo" don't have to pay for his stuff but he's got great advice that tripled my dating! make women chase YOU, not the other way around

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