Would you stay with your partner if they became paralyzed in an accident?

Question

After people pointed out in my other question that they would not leave their partner after a bad accident that left them paralyzed, I decided to make this one to see what your thoughts are. 

So, again, I read someone's story in a YouTube comment on a video I was watching, which left me empathetic for the woman involved. She was left paralyzed from the waist down after a head on collision with a drunk driver. After the incident, her world was turned upside down. She lost her boyfriend, her friends, her job, everything. 

So, if something as horrific as this left your hypothetical partner paralyzed in some way, would you stay? Why or why not?

JudgmentDay · Accepted Answer

Despite what many had voted here I wondered in actuality and in real life how many are really true to what they believed in or voted for.

This is an example of an unexpected tragedy that can occur to someone over the course of their life time.

Just by knowing how bad things can happen to ALL people regardless of whether they are good, innocent, bad, or corrupt, it can still happen completely unexpectedly. So I would never allow myself to take any chances ever with being emotionally attached to someone so deeply in any relationships to begin with as I really don't know how I would face things like these when and if they had ever happened before my eyes unexpectedly.

I rather have never been involved with any of it at all in the very first place, as it's the only way I can think of to completely avoid being in or involved in situations like these. Well for most part, but if it happened to someone in my own family that I was close to, then I'm pretty much stuck with having to face and deal with it no matter what. But that is somewhat different compared to a partner or significant other.

Voted the last one, Other.

kaylaS91 · Accepted Answer

This is the gist of my answer to your other question on the same topic:
Would I date or develop an interest in someone who I may find has a good personality and I get along with well, but who wouldn't be able to participate in activities that I enjoy a lot like biking, playing badminton, or just going to the gym and spending the majority of time on the elliptical together?
No. Despite this person possibly being very attractive or having a personality that meshes well with my own, that doesn't trump the fact that a lot of my needs from the relationship, or things I like spending a lot of my time (while not at work/school) doing would be things they'd be unable to join me in doing. Not to mention sexual things...

Would I stay with my current boyfriend? Yes, most likely. Of course I'd miss biking and such with him but I'm sure we could find other joint activities to do together.

redeyemindtricks · Accepted Answer

I don't recall a wedding vow to the effect of "till disability do us part".
MY wedding vows were "for better or for worse". Including that "for worse" part. And I MEANT that shit.

I'd push that boy around in that chair for the rest of his earthly life... and I wouldn't resent it for a second.
... Because love.
<3

Also... Who the fuck are we kidding. I'd still be 10,000,000,000,000 times happier with him than I'd be with any other man, even if I basically had to play full-time nurse. There's still no question.

__

Fuck people who break promises.

unkissme · Accepted Answer

If someone leaves someone just because they've been injured and their life has changed dramatically, then they are a coward. It's horrible to think that on top of everything else traumatic about being paralyzed, etc., you might find out that the person you love sees that as a dealbreaker.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

If I were with them previously I would stay and try to make it work the best I could.

Amuro · Answer

If I'm love then I would try to stay with her. But the answer to this question for most people men and women would be no. When I was younger I had major surgery on my spine so I lost the use of my legs. The girl I was dating visited me once in the hospital and saw my condition it was over from then.

It took about three years of rehab and more surgeries for me to be able to walk again. So a lot of people may say yes but when they get put in that position you don't know how they would react.

Could you answer my question.

www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2112691-was-i-wrong-to-ask-for-the-money-back

Azgeda · Answer

Of course I fucking would.  I'll fucking push her around in a trolley cart if that's what it comes to.  Where we are going , we DON'T NEED LEGS but legs would be nice lol

Paris13 · Answer

"A" for Absolutely Stay with my Partner, @RainbowFanGirl.
I have no Reason to Leave him if This is the Time in his own Life that he Would need me the Most. And anyone I Love, Past and Present, would Do the Same for me.
Good luck and Great question, Thanks for Sharing. xx

LittleSally · Answer

Of course.
While getting into a new relationship with a paralized person may seem extremely daunting and like a huge responsibility when it's supposed to be light and fun, if you're already with that person, then you know you're already really into them, maybe even love them. Nothing is changed - now you just get to prove your devotion.

SaltAndLime · Answer

I chose other because an accident such as this could change the person involved to become a person who doesn't want to move forward for them self or their partner.
If my significant other was constantly pushing me away and unwilling to accept his injury, I can't honestly say I would stay with him and be the reciever of his anger and inevitable depression for an extended length of time.(over two years)
However, if he was willing to try and find a life he was happy with and I could help him adjust and get through it, I wouldn't even think of leaving him. I can't honestly pick yes or no without being put in that situation.

2167Phillip · Answer

my psrents abused me as a child. i was beaten. neglected. emotionally tortured. when they geew too old to sicklyvto care for themselves. i stepped in and took care of their every need every demand. i could have just up and left. or put them both on niesonf homes for what they did to me as revenge. but i didn't. i broke my back 12 hours a day with backbreaking housework. never complained once. and i did it for almost 20 years. i think that pretty much says what i wpuld do if my wife was paealized in an accident. and just because your paralized does notcmean you can't have sex.

vishna · Answer

I would hope that I would stay. But I can't say that with 100% certainty.
If the relationship was new, there's a bigger chance I wouldn't stay. If he was my husband or long time partner or I really loved/saw love there, yea, I would try to stay or definitely would stay.

Bluemax · Answer

Yes, I certainly would.

Now, a trickier question might be would you stick around if the person suffered brain damage. Suppose your partner were reduced to the faculties of a toddler or even an infant. What then?

pervertedjester · Answer

I'd like to think I would as would most people. I guess it comes down who we have become as a person by that point. I would hopefully and at least try my very best to be the one who stays. Yet I should point out that people who get crippled via accident can push people away quite effectively. I can also hope that I would remember that fact when facing it.

Anonymous · Answer

I hope would, but you can't pretend it wouldn't really impact your romantic relationship. It won't be easy - the same as many other hardships. Sometimes you make a commitment and lose your financial stability, sex life, companionship, free time, future plans, etc to your partner's circumstances.

Anonymous · Answer

I would always try to remain in there life in some capacity. But I don't think I could be with them. I'm not even big on sex, so this wouldn't be why, but it's one of the cons. Sex is basically laying there, it would oddly feel like rape to me. She wouldn't be able to move.

Also travel would be harder &a many other things. Which is why I would be there, but I couldn't stay in a romantic relationship, No.

DaniaMQ · Answer

Hell no I'm not leaving. He would need me more than ever, he would already be facing some awful times from that accident, the last thing I would want is to make him even feel worse. I ain't leaving no where 😜

CHARismatic110 · Answer

I answered this already and said that I wouldn't leave them.

Marinepilot · Answer

I wouldn't, I know this sounds cold and callous, but I've seen these situations
and invariably the care giver gets burned out and resentful. Which is normal. Then they say "Fuck it ! My needs aren't being met ". Then they have affairs and ultimately leave. And I don't believe you can blame them. Some may stay until the bitter end. Although I'd venture not many.

DivaMonae · Answer

Originally I was thinking yes but then I began to contemplate because realistically we're all selfish people some more than less and though staying and taking care of them would be the right thing to do it's also the hard thing.

And then I came to my conclusion because I could possibly want and need to rely on a life partner one day due to a medical condition. So how how could offer any less?

BaileyisDarcy · Answer

Eeeeehhhh I dont knoow...

Id like to think i would. I really like to think that i would, to tell myself that im the kind of selfless person who would stay.

But if im being honest with myself Im a selfish piece of shit. Maybe i might surprise myself, maybe I might stick around, but honestly? I doubt it.
I probably wouldn't as much as I might pretend otherwise.

ToruMatsuda · Answer

I don't think you get the idea, literally everyone here said yes but the reality is obviously different, few would actually stay.

DodgersGM · Answer

A similar thing happened to a family friend of ours not too long ago. He became paralyzed from the waist down and his marriage crumbled. Luckily he's able to work, and he makes a very good living.

I'd definitely stay with my hypothetical wife if she became paralyzed. I imagine she'd have to work through some things mentally before being 'right' again, but I'd be there to help her through that process too.

EmpatheticLady · Answer

As you know, yes, I would stay with him. His paralysis does not change my love for him. I fell in love with him for more than just his ability to walk.

Would you stay with your partner if they became paralyzed in an accident?

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