She isn't over her ex, I'm in love with her and want to wait, I don't quite understand her though... (Page 2)

Question

So, I met this girl about six months ago at work.  We would always talk and flirt and we had wonderful, meaningful, deep conversations.  We had great chemistry and we just simply got a long great.  I asked her out to dinner after talking for a few weeks and we had a great time.  We went out a couple of times more and she wound up bringing up the fact that we get a long wonderfully but she can't do anything right at the moment because she is working through issues with her past.  I understood and told her I wanted to continue to be friends.  A few more months went on and we continued to hang out.  I got the feeling she was pushing me away so I spoke to her about it and she told me that she just wasn't ready for anything.  She told me she was still in love with her ex but didn't plan to get back with him and didn't want to lose me because I was a special person and a wonderful friend.  She said things like "I wish I would've met you before" and "this is just bad timing," and "I'm going to keep working on my issues" but she can only offer friendship right now.  I told her I'd wait forever and she said she didn't want me to that it's not fair to me.   I continued to hang out with her a lot and got closer to her family and we finally brought up the conversation one more time after going out to dinner.  She told me she's scared she will never get over her ex.  She said she didn't want to have the conversation about that again because it's just too hard right now and she would feel she would have to push me away if I couldn't just accept the fact that we are friends.  I felt that I needed to respect her for that and all she needs is a friend.  I did have to ask her, what do you feel for me?  She said "you know, you are the perfect guy," "everything about you is what I would want in 'the one'" but she said she's still in love with her ex, he was her first love, and doesn't want to rebound with me.  What I don't understand is, why would she flirt with me and tell me she just wants to be friends.  She also said she compares her ex to me a lot and realizes all the things that make me a good person.  She just can't explain why she can't move on just yet.   I want to wait around.  I'm not just a young kid who thinks he's in love.  I have thought I was in love a million times but what I feel for this girl has no comparison to anyone in the past.  I think about her constantly and when I think about moving on all I realize is that I don't want to move on because I only have eyes for her.  But its hard to wait around if she is simply NEVER going to get over her ex.   What I really need advice about it how to be a friend.  I texted her the other day and said how I really missed her and wanted to be with her and she wrote back "please stop that, you know the conversation we had, it's not appropriate."  "you know how hard it is for me."   What should I do?  I hope someone has good advice because this is tormenting me.

ladymackillah · Answer

So basicaly I think that you should honestly give her time because I know from your side and also hers. You just need too give her time. Its hard trying to move on and get over your ex. So be her friend until she is ready too be more than that. Your just pushing her away when you keep telling her that you want to be with her. Just spend more time with her as a friend until its time.

bunny420 · Answer

I'd find someone else casually, but it sounds like you don't want to do that. If she sees you slipping away she may change her mentality on the situation.

Wild_princess · Answer

Sometimes you have to let go things, what us yours, you will get it... and what is not yours can never be yours... so don't get stuck😊

Anonymous · Answer

Men & women aren't supposed to understand each other, so you are okay.

Anonymous · Answer

just tell her her ex is in the past and you are right here willing to love her.

brianccc · Answer

She probs does not like you

Anonymous · Answer

date other people.

Anonymous · Answer

move on.

Tphilly187 · Answer

give her time

She isn't over her ex, I'm in love with her and want to wait, I don't quite understand her though... (Page 2)

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