Im 24 years old and been with my girl for 6 years.. so almost my whole life lol.. my girl is super sweet and i love her but maybe our time has come. Because i feel as a person i have grown a lot mentally the last couple of years. I really like having deep conversations but it feels like she only likes to talk about what happend this day and about the few subjects she likes? I have no problems doing things she likes : I've seen all Disney movies etc lol but i have the feeling its a bit one sided? Also mindfulness became a big part of my life for the last year or so and it helpt me a lot with my mental problems (my father got killed and i lost a few people really close to me in a short period of time) i try to show her this way but i dont think im able to show her the way? I dunno she is a really smart girl but i think she is not ready for it or maybe she never will be? Also she does not like changes She is super sweet and in rough times she really helpt me just by showing she loved me but in my opinion she couldve done more she wanted me to go to therapy but I've always been my own therapist and im doing ok plus friends always come to me for advice and i have no problem helping them but maybe in asking too much... And i know for a fact I've out grown her sexually because im very open minded and she is quite the opposite.. I still think she is pretty but not that sexy maybe? Also i can't denie i notice a lot of girls /women seem to be intrested in me and i kinda wanna know whats that all about.. Since I've only slept with 1 girl before my girlfriend.. and im scared this wil haunt me when im older
Dont get it twisted i still love her but maybe thats not enough? She is super sweet and i can't even remember not being with her but maybe our time has come? But i dont want to make a big mistake because this may be the biggest dicision in my life yet.. So please help me ! Sorry for my bad English im Dutch
Six years of dedicated loyality into the relationship between you two really shows how far you both have come! From what you described, she has her own set of flaws like you do but it sounds like the relationship is still healthy even then if you both are still in love after all these years! People who don't feel attached or fall out of love usually bail out within the first few years so there's something about her that keeps your heart close to her! None of us know what she's like and what experiences you two shared so this is a decision you have to make for yourself.
If it helps, I was in the same boat when I grew up with my childhood friend for 9 years then dated her for 3 years before breaking up, thinking I couldn't handle the relationship. I felt miserable inside, realizing we shared memories for half our lifetime and I kept yearning to feel her touch, her kind words and the quality time we spent together. I eventually got back with her and we've been dating since! The closer of a connection you have with someone, the harder it is to let them go.
Decide if you believe breaking up will be beneficial to you both long-term or if it'll cause too much pain. You can talk about your concerns with your girlfriend to see what she says about it! It's important not to be impulsive and think this through. Loyality like this is very rare but don't make yourself feel like a prisoner if you're not happy with the relationship. Trust your heart and you'll know what's best. Hope this helps with what you're looking for!
You're very welcome! No matter which choice you make, just know that you have good intentions with the decision you make. Love can be difficult to deal with at times!
I didn't believe guya when they said that their wife was their best friend.
That was until i met my wife. She is the 1 person in my world that is, but not limited to: Friend Lover Sounding board for random ideas Nurse (ive been messed up for the past few years. She helps me with everything a visiting nurse would tend to) Therapist Psychiatrist Assistant auto mechanic I can go on and on and on.
But im 42 and my body is somewhat wrecked. You are 24 with a normal acting brain. We aren't in the same boat.
But i would bow out gracefully.
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Thats really great to hear and thanks for your oponion
If you have to ask strangers if you should still be with your girlfriend, then you don't truly wish to be with her anymore.
I honestly think you should stay with her because from what you wrote, she seems like a great girl, and it's just you that wants more. But it's not my relationship to make a final decision.
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Yes that may be true but im asking y'all because i really dont know and thought new insights could help also its hard to talk about such issues with her. thanks tho !
Trust me man. Stick with her. Loyalty over six years is nothing you should toss away. Maybe someday she'd be open to experiment but other woman won't be that radical of a sexual change. And its better she only suggests you go to therapy as people who aren't a licensed professional can really fk you up without trying to. There's only so much help one can give while keeping a relationship healthy and while deep conversations are fun there comes a time where you know eachother so well that sometimes it can be deep just to keep things simple and to notice what changes over time. The subtle unspoken conversation.
You'll probably never find a woman who can truly hold a deep conversation. I've looked for years. That's what friends are for, but a friend whose at that level is almost as hard to find.
The adventurous sex part will eat away at you. You know you have options, and being stuck in an unfulfilling relationship is hard. You'll start to resent her.
Showing you she loves you during hard times isn't enough. Even a dog can do that. Does she influence you to push yourself to be a better person? Does she encourage you in everything you do? Does she make your life easier or add value to it?
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I have a few Friends who can tho and yes im afraid it will fuck me over in a few years.. but she still adds value to my life... thanks tho !
If you love her and you guys have been through that much I say don't give up fight till the very last and give it everything you've got if that's what you really want don't let anybody or anything stand in your way for fighting for what you believe in and how you feel the question is is do you want to try to make it work and do everything you can to make it better or do you feel like you just need to walk away when you answer that question honestly to yourself then you'll know which route to go and which will work out best for you
Have you talked with her about it? Like everything you asked us, have you asked her? What did she say?
And being with multiple women pales in comparison to a long term relationship, you're not really missing too much.
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A little bit but its hard because she gets angry as a self defence mechanism i think? because she is afraid to lose me? also i think if i say all these things were done fore..
If the relationship is over if you talk about your feelings, that's an unstable relationship already. I feel like both of y'all should be on the same page at all times, seems like both of you drifted apart and staying together for the sake of the relationship. She probably does get angry as a self defence mechanism, you know her better than any of us.
I would talk to her about how you feel, and reassure her you're going nowhere. If she ends the relationship over that, then maybe it's for the best, sounds like it could be a toxic relationship, there's no point in being with someone you don't like/doesnt like you.
Sometimes love isn't enough. If youve out grown the relationship it might be better to let her know and let her go. Maybe feels the same. Just be honest with yourself and her.
Dude, yoi gave 8000 and 1 reasons why you think your relationship has run its course. Like, you said, you usually self diagnose your own issues. I think you just did that.
You think the grass is greener. She loves you and wants to settle down. You want to play the field before setting down. But if you give her up now, you might never get her back. Look at it this way, if you want kids, is she the woman that allow access to them than money, or wants more before she will let you see your kids. In love with you or money. But after six years. I think the lost is yours
one of the worst things you can do for the present is get into a serious relationship. perhaps your at a crossroads and have to decide what to do. it's hard to be in this predicament but life is full of these moments. follow your heart and hope it leads you to happiness.
Please delete this post its my own post i deleted my acc but this is still up with my pic... when you type in my name you can find this thats the last thing I've wanted
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