Guys, is possible for a girl to be TOO good looking for you to approach? Why?

Also known as ‘The Hawt Girl’ curse, is it possible for a woman that is very attractive to not be approached SOLELY because she’s just that good looking?
  • Yes, this is possible.
    Vote A
  • Maybe for some guys but not me.
    Vote B
  • It is for me but not most guys.
    Vote C
  • No, this is a myth.
    Vote D
  • I’m a girl.
    Vote E
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

0|0
688

Most Helpful Guys

  • You have to differentiate. There is a difference between a really attractive "cute" girl, and really attractive "hot" girl. If you are really "hot" (the way you dress and do your make up mostly) , you will be intimidating and be less approached. If you are really attractive, but "cute", then you are going to have much more attention.

    When girls go out, they tend to dress and do their make up/hair in a "hot" top model kind of way. Like Adriana Lima or something. I would never ever in a 100 years be confident enough to approach a girl that looks like Adriana Lima. And that means a lot considering im very muscular, yet still scared of hot girls.

    1|2
    0|0
    • I agree but I think "hot" is not also just intimidating, its also not that good. I personally am not interested in "hot" girls. If a girl is beautiful and wears little to no makeup and wears more simple clothes, I think they are way more likely to have a good personality and so I am far more attracted to them and far more likely to approach them.

    • @bamesjond0069
      "I agree but I think "hot" is not also just intimidating, its also not that good" you are right, i also develope feelings and attraction for "cute" girls much more than hot ones. In fact, i was never fell in love with a hot girl. I think its directly tied with how intimidating a hot girl looks. Because intimidation is not feminine. Its masculine, and therefore less attractive in girls.
      Its the other way round for guys. When guys are intimidating by being very muscular or something, its not a bad thing. Its attractive.

      I wish girls would realize that. I hate it when i go out with my girlfriend and she has a "hot" style and clothes. When i say i prefer her without make up, she doesn't understand. She thinks im telling her she looks bad. Its annoying..

  • You asked 2 questions there.
    Yes it is possible for s girl to be too good looking to approach her.
    No I don't think that a very attractive woman won't be approached at all because of this. It's just that some won't do it. Some will of course.

    For the first question it really is about your self esteem and stuff, with people sort of sorting people into "leagues" with hers just being too high or I don't know.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I never mentioned anything about her never being approached lol, just asked if her looks would be a sole reason as to why a guy decides not to talk to her.

    • The "hawt gurl curse" part really sounded like that

Most Helpful Girl

  • I’m a girl. And I believe if you get discouraged just by someone’s looks, you’re chicken af. It’s just an unnecessary excuse for cowardice. Doesn’t matter if you’re a man or woman. If good looks scare you away, you’re just a punk 🤷🏾‍♀️😂

    1|1
    0|6
    • I don't think looks are any different than other categories when it comes to preconceptions about people. Are men cowards if they don't approach a woman who appears to be acting too dumb to date? :)

    • Show All
    • @infp_libra_78

      What you are describing are negative characteristics.
      Not being attracted or turned off by certain qualities isn’t cowardice. That’s just preference.

    • @Ellie. I don't understand your comment. What I really mean is that people reserve the right to choose a mate based on any quality they like. Based on experience or not. I don't approach just anyone, that would be a waste of time. There are many "nice/attractive" girls out there, and frankly if they are hot they may be swarmed by other guys with alterior motives. So when presented with attractive women who put more signals out there, or qualities that are a match, I'll focus on them. If the hot girl doesn't like that, she can approach me or put more out there, door swings both ways.

Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Girls & Guys Said

586
  • No, not at all. Worst case Scenario is you have a convo with a really Beautiful woman.

    Only way I wouldn't Approach her is if I am in a Society where guys don't Approach women in public.

    0|0
    0|0
  • In a way, I guess. Some may assume they have no chance or that she’s taken.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Oh fuck yeah there are tons of girls that I thought were WAY out of my league.
    Basically my entire high school. Getting bullied really did wonders for my self-esteem when I got to high school, even the girls who apparently gave me obvious signs I didn't think would be into me.
    I didn't actually start getting bold and listening to my cock until I was about 20 and in University.
    Then shit started happening.

    0|2
    0|0

  • Often that happens...

    If you Google "Beautiful Girl Syndrome", that's basically saying that beautiful girls can be bitchier and high maintenance because guys are willing to put up with more because she is so beautiful. Guys won't put up with so much shit and work if the girl isn't so attractive.

    "Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type II" is a phrase I coined, but it's a real thing I discovered not quite 40 years ago. This will take some time to explain...

    All guys need to feel that they can "win". They view things as something like a competition in which there is some goal that they want to achieve. If a guy wants something and he believes that there is SOME possibility that he may get it, he will get emotionally involved. If he begins to believe that he won't get that, then he begins to withdraw and get emotionally detached. However, sometimes a guy doesn't even think he has a chance, so he doesn't bother...

    And this is where "Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type II" comes in. If a girl is really beautiful, a regular guy thinks:
    1. There are a zillion other guys who want her.
    2. She almost certainly already has a boyfriend.
    3. There is no way she'd be attracted to me; I am not anything special.
    4. If she did date me, she'd dump me for some better-looking guy who will hit on her and there definitely will be such a guy.
    5. She's going to be bitchy and high maintenance. (In other words, he's thinking she suffers from normal Beautiful Girl Syndrome.)

    So, he basically thinks that
    1) he doesn't have a chance to get her,
    2) if he did, he'll lose her, and
    3) she's going to be a lot of work.

    Because oceans of guys think like this - the only exception being the hunky guys - the beautiful girl either can't find a guy or goes with dickhead hunky guys (who suffer from Beautiful Guy Syndrome). Of course, the regular guys see the beauties with the hunky guys and that just reinforces their belief that they don't have a chance...

    Oh, and one more thing: Since the beautiful girls can get guys, they are getting laid... So, any new boyfriend has to "compete" against all of her past lovers and many guys don't think they are going to "measure up" (if you know what I mean) compared to those past hunky guys.

    So, a beautiful girl needs to be proactive and hit on men instead of waiting for them to hit on her. A beautiful girl being proactive removes doubts males have regarding Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2.

    1|0
    0|0
    • BGST2, as I outlined above, applies to both the real world and dating sites.
      However, the critical difference is that guys on Tinder approach because there are less consequences of rejection - it is better to be rejected in private over the web than it is to be rejected at a bar or party in front of anyone you know. This "fear of rejection, thus not approach" is human nature for both males and females. This is why a beautiful girl can be more successful on Tinder as opposed to being in the real world.

  • There's a girl I am interested in now and won't ever step up and ask. I feel that she's either out of my league or taken (by a male or female). We get along fantastically well, she's fun to be around, but I'm not going to risk losing what we do have for something that might not work.

    Instead I'm trying to gauge interest by watching for signals; body language, speech, and visual cues like nervousness or flicking the hair.

    Yes it's stupid and I am being ridiculous, I know this already.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Because “Hawt Girls” are high maintenance. They’re hot. They know it. They know they have their veritable pick of the litter which tends to make the spoiled and fickle as well as unfaithful.

    So I don’t wast my time with any chick higher on the scale than an 8. Got better shit to do than be part of some hot girls fan club.

    0|4
    0|0
  • I have enough issues trying to ask out "regular women." So a Supermodel type, I wouldn't be likely to approach to ask her out. I may talk to her, but I think there would have to be some reason.

    Regular girls make me stupid enough without them being stunning. I'm keeping quiet with the ones that I find gorgeous. The more I open my mouth, the more likely it is that I sound like an idiot as it is.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Not for me, but there is another dimension that makes girls hard to approach for me. It's not hotness but height. When I find really attractive girls who are, say, 6'6, then I find it difficult to approach them (though I have). It just feels strange to flirt with a girl looking up when my face is level to her boobs. It throws off my whole kind of game... I start to feel "cute" instead of "manly" to her, and I'm not as experienced playing the "cute" angle.

    0|0
    0|0
    • But for girls just slightly taller than me or my height or shorter, no problem. Doesn't matter how hot they are.

    • In particular there was this one girl I found so attractive.. and she was ridiculously tall -- I think 6'8 or so. And I didn't realize how tall she was until I approached her and then stepped down a couple of steps (I was standing near the bar area and she was two steps below) and found my head level to her chest while seeing her looming over me.

      And that pretty much messed up my entire plan right away... so I was like, "Uhh, hello... wanna make babies together?" (that's all I could think of out of desperation). And then she scratched me on the head and said I was so cute... and I didn't really know how to work with the "cute" thing and try to turn that into a date, so I kind of fled and went back to the bar area and climbed those two steps again.

  • I guarantee half the chodes who are voting yes probably don't even approach at all. In reality if I'm going to approach, I'm not going to waste my time if I'm not attracted to her, therefore I'm only going to approach girls who I find very good looking, this is basic common sense.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Some women just don't have an approachable air about them though. A lot of the ones who are like that, also happen to be really attractive

    • Show All
    • cyber high five! I do the same thing. I've definitely saved myself a lot of aggravation that way

    • @winterfox10 Haha definitely, respect man

  • Yeah there are 10s that are intimidating, but at this point in my life and career about the only thing a girl could be that would make me put her out of range in my head is actually celebrity status or something along those lines.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yeah we mostly fear of some things
    1) we may be to ugly for her and get rejected
    2) she maybe already taken
    3) we’re probably not her type (her kind of guy style on dressing or looking)
    4) she’s probably lesbian
    5) she could be a stuck up bitch

    2|2
    0|0
  • Approaching for me depends on more than her looks, it's her body language and personality also. If she's "approachable" meaning, do I think she's friendly, wants to be approached, possibly interested in me also etc.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Surely, you know when someone is out of your league. I'm not attracted to the "pretty girls" who are slammed with make up and such so I never have an issue with going up to a person because they are in my case not that one girl everyone has a crush on

    0|2
    0|0
  • l scare girls of with my good looks they tell me that they thought that l would not date them as they were not very nice looking and that is just not true one girl told me on here that she was ugly and said that l would not like her l told her that was a lot of rubbish and that she is very nice looking thats called low self esteem

    0|1
    0|0
  • I struggle to approach an average looking girl let alone a good looking one. Whenever I see a really really hot girl I assume she's either 1. Taken (to a really hot guy), 2. Wouldn't be interested in me as she'd want someone more on par with her level (a really hot guy) or 3. Just generally fed up of guys approaching her. 😂 Either way, all 3 reasons mean I never approach hot girls haha

    0|0
    0|0
  • Absolutely, most guys know their range. Only a small percentage ignore that and still try anyways. If you're a 6/10, you're not getting a 9/10. Your BEST case is a 8/10 unicorn that happens to like you. Usually you go with +/- 1 of your attractiveness scale.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I've seen some super beautiful girls in school I was too scared to approach simply because they're too beautiful and sometimes bc I fear rejection. But my mistake was that I didn't even try.

    0|1
    0|0
  • there's these high class bitches, me and my friends call them: "the untouchables" they're the type that would not speak to you unless you're straight up a ten or proven trailer trash.
    even if the girls themselves are not even that hot.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For all you know you are the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. With that being said. I think most girls and guys should approach whoever they find attractive. People don't know what you want until you make it clear.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Nobody should ever feel like that, but let's be honest, everyone sets a certain line where they think the girl is out of their league, when in reality there is no such thing.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Depends on if her level of bitchiness matches her level of beauty.

    If she is really friendly, then I would approach her. But many extremly good looking girls have a very bad attitude towards men and then I'll stay out of her way.

    0|0
    1|0
  • Yeah, my friends always complain about leagues and stuff. I just talk to the girl I find cute, worst that can happen is getting a No which you already had before.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Only if her attitude is clearly obhorrent and makes her uneasy to approach. A Smile can go for miles, but bitches get stitches.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It depends on weather i have a chance with them. If i think i dont have a chance then its easy to talk to them and approach them. But if i think i have a chance then its really hard💀 I don't know im weird like that. I have no problem with talking to cute girls i dont think i have a chance with

    0|0
    0|0
  • If I don't approach an attractive woman, it isn't *because* she's attractive--it's for some other reason.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I used to think that, but then again... you won't find out if you don't try. I'm an average looking guy, but as long as you're polite and nice to her, you'll soon discover that it's not all about the looks.

    0|0
    0|0
  • When a girl is THAT beautiful, you believe there’s no way she’s gonna be into you. Then again you think that a lot of other guys already are chasing her. So you wanna just leave it at that.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think this is somewhat true, I have a really hot friend and she gets approached literally ALL THE TIME when we're on a night out.

    0|1
    0|0
  • Definitely. I've never made a move on a women higher than a 7/10

    0|2
    0|0
  • Most decent guys will assume you are out of their legue however self centered assholes will always approach you because they think your the lucky ones if they do

    0|1
    0|0
  • They're not to good looking for me at all. It's just that I don't like high-maintenance girls because I have to do everything for them been there and done that. I'm not an ATM

    0|0
    0|0
  • Some what true my friend go through that hard for to find a guy who is Confident but isn’t cocky and sometimes women are in packs that don’t always help.

    0|1
    0|0
  • sometimes when some of my guy friends sees a good looking girl, they tell me "hey look at that direction!" and i'm like "oh shit, go holler at her!" and they usually seems to say these 3 things to me the most, which is:

    1. she's so beautiful/gorgeous/hot/cute, i bet she's already taken or have a boyfriend

    2. i'm ugly, she's out of my league and will most likely reject me instantly

    3. there's probably a lot of guys better looking and wealthier than me, i stand no chance and she'll never even bat an eye to me

    1|0
    0|0
  • I have approached every woman I found attractive for fourteen years from the age of 12 to 26. I had been rejected every time and decided that enough was enough and gave up.

    0|0
    0|0
    • So what do you do now? No longer hit on women? Do women hit on you sometimes? You're not bad looking by any means. What do you think is wrong> Just curious.

    • @Wally48
      I no longer hit on women. Women have never hit on me. I presume it came across as desperate. However, I have never asked them what the issue was.

  • You must be talking about The Waifu curse. 2D girls are just perfect, but we can never have them.

    3|1
    0|0
  • I know a girls looks can be intimidating but don't be too discouraged cuz you never know what her type is, it might be you.

    0|2
    0|0
    • That's a nice feel good sentiment, but the reality stands that people tend to go with people of similar value. If you're a 6, you should be happy with a 7 and blessed with an 8. That's the reality.

  • yes. in a lot of cases, dudes will assume that they already have a boyfriend.

    1|1
    0|0
  • Actually I'll be happier and more welcoming if a "too good" looking girl approached me

    0|0
    0|0
  • Every body has in mind some dream partner and when u dream it's obvious u try to figure out a handsome and charming girl, so that creates pull bit earlier.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes, it's true.

    But in my case, any and most girls are too attractive for someone as ugly looking as me to approach them...

    So I avoid girls in genral, especially out in public, I'm never gonna be good looking enough for then to even be friends with me if anything, if I was friends with an attractive girl, it would ruin her social life and friendships... And it has done...

    A girl I knew had friends who didn't like me and said I was ugly and she shouldn't be friends with me, so she stopped being my friend...

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes and no... Depends on the girl's attitude and personality for me tbh

    0|0
    0|0
  • If they have good looks chances are she is taken. If she has a good personality too, then she most likely taken. Plus im not good looking or have anything to stand out.

    0|0
    0|0
  • For me it has to do with the whole she gets a lot of attention from guys and I won’t be one of them. So I move on with life.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yes it is for me. Because, I feel like I can't compare to her standard of looks.

    0|0
    0|0
  • i work as a guard and see a lot of very cute girls and i have been rejected and crushed by so many i just look and get feelings of her telling me iam not good enough or good looking

    0|0
    0|0
  • Im assuming were talking about those 1/100? Sure, its not like im the only one whos attracted to her, in fact absolutely every guy you have ever met is. So from her standpoint she can literally pick anyone she wants. If so ill just do my own thing and if she picks me yippikay yey mf! No but really truth be told, she's approached by dozens of guys every week. In fact 90% of the guys she comes into contact with are unable to act normal around her if you take into accout that theyll fall for her in a matter of short time. All this makes her act and carry herself in a certain way especially if she's been like that all her life and many of us know that approaching her will at best just be a waste of time if she's polite

    1|1
    0|0
  • The hawt girls have such an excellent opinion about themselves and consider the world owes them a lot because they're hawt.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Girls make men out to be more complicated than we actually are, mainly because girls themselves don't understand themselves

    0|0
    0|0
  • She's either taken or something is seriously wrong with her.

    Those are my thoughts when I see a hot girl.

    0|0
    0|0
  • But it all depends on her style. Beautiful but looks false? Na. To shallow. Natural beauty? I will approach everytime

    1|0
    0|0
Show More
41

Recommended myTakes

Loading...