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Guess that depends on where the bar is, to be in the Top 20% of men.
If it's as simple as:
1. Moderately good looking
2. Has a job
3. Has his own place
4. Confident
5. Has is own ride if it makes sense in that area.
Then yea, I could see the Top 20% of guys getting with 80% of women sexually. It's easier to take a girl home if you have a place to take her, rather than trying to sneak her in your window like a highschooler. Being good looking or at least trying on your appearance is better than not trying at all. Being confident enough to go for it makes it easier to leave with a girl if you're too shy to even talk to her.
Could see a variety of reasons why it would be easier. But if you have to make 6 figures to be in the Top 20% of men, then I don't believe that theory at all. But if you're just looking at factors that directly or indirectly apply to dating, then I could see the argument for it. The bar is pretty low today for better or worse.
I guess it depends on where you live. (Age may be a factor as well). Around here there are thousands of single guys with the 5 factors you mentioned above, in a small to medium sized city. That creates to serious competition. You have to find some way to set yourself apart from the crowd or you get nothing.
@WalterBlack yea, I could see that. Like in NYC having your own vehicle doesn't actually make sense. Even DC to some extent. I don't think age is really a factor tho, outside of how it pertains to the other factors. Like if you're 21-25 with roommates or with Mom and Dad, that's more understandable than being 40 living with mom and dad or with roommates unless the area is very expensive like NYC. I imagine the average person in NYC has at least 1 roommate because of the cost of living.
@WalterBlack wow. men think the above traits are "competition." priceless. y'all think that having a secure job flipping burgers and being "moderately" good looking is going to make you a part of the top 20% of men? wow. top 20% of men are those that are 10/10 in all qualities. model-type men with tons of cash, a Porsche, and a mansion. but i don't think 80 percent of women care about those type of men. unless they are golddiggers of course.
@DianaWest: 20% of men don't fit your description, probably less than 0.5%.
In dating that might be somewhat accurate since one guy can date several women in the span of a year or so. However, in long term relationships that would be mathematically impossible unless the people in question are polygamists.
Even in terms of dating, I think it is something like the top 40-50% of men that get 80% of the women.
Still, if you are not in the top 50% of guys, it is basically a waste of time to look for a woman unless your standards are low.
That i would say is much closer to being accurate, but not completely accurate.
So if you're not in the top 50%, what's wrong with hanging with a 4 or 5 level girl? There are a lot of nice girls at that level. Many make great companions. Some may think they deserve a level 10 guy, but deep inside they know they're not level 10 material. That's why I'm not totally convinced of hypergamy.
Many guys believe that only to justify their lack of attraction and their lack of motivation to better themselves.
I don’t believe that for a second. Incredibly biased idea, with many errors and cognitive fallacies. It’s mostly something that unattractive men love to hold on to just to make themselves feel better.
Looks aren’t everything my friend
@AJC997 no they aren't
No one said they’re not important.
@AJC997 First off, I get the feeling that you're not nearly as ugly as you think you are, so don't get a fucking nose job, dude. That's retarded.
Second, getting a personal trainer is given, but this is 2019. We have self-driving cars, robot dogs, vegetarian cheeseburgers, and YouTube. There's are all kinds of cardio workouts on there that you can follow along with for free, and plenty of personal trainers plying their trade for the same. Look up a guy called Athlene-X. He's very knowledgeable.
@Mr1987Joe
I’m not ugly, no, but what else could I spend that 6 or 7’000 dollars on that would improve my chances of getting into a relationship?
And yeah I guess you’re right, a personal trainer is overrated since there’s exercises on YouTube. I really want to build my clavicles so I can look a little more built and bigger, have more physical presence
@AJC997 How about taking it and opening up a savings account to show a lady that you're not impulsive and fiscally responsible?
Well, the clavicle is a bone, not a muscle. So, that's not going to work out, too well. Also, do not focus on any specific muscle. Perform a varied regimen that hits your entire body. Don't fall into the trap of obsessing about your appearance. Work on your athleticism, and your bodily aesthetics will be an endearing side-effect of your devotion.
@AJC997 You can work out on your own using a far less expensive gym, walking and biking. Unless your nose is damaged through boxing or an accident, live with and love yourself. Maybe after doing general improvements and boosting your confidence, you'll find you don't have to spend thousands of dollars on flaws that are deeply unimportant. Look healthy, dress nicely, use your brains and personality. Those are the keys to attraction.
@Screenwriter @AJC997 Words of wisdom. Listen to the lady, bud.
@Mr1987Joe I am flattered, Mr. Joe. I'd offer you a cup of Joe, if I could... Regards.
@Screenwriter
Lol
@Screenwriter OoOo... That sounds good. I'm making coffee, now.
@AJC997: on another thread, I mentioned dance lessons. Women love guys that can dance and the lessons will make you more confident.
Dancing is a neglected skill. Because my very young son took ballet lessons, he learned how to be a good skate boader. I claim leading him to that. He was chosen to go to a dance academy. But he'd had enough. Went for more traditional music. You might learn an instrument or language too. Travel abroad.
@Screenwriter: Agreed on all points. I would recommend French in particular as a language to target.
You are just trying to woo me, aren't you Logo! French is a hard one though. It's like learning a new version of English. Lots of irregular verbs, silent pronounciations. It's a devil. Very pretty though. Visiting France makes learning the language worthwhile. A lovely city Paris, beautiful Loire Valley where so many wines are cultivated...
@Screenwriter: my mother taught French at the high school level. The language was my first love because I had not had a girlfriend when I first had it in school.
Sorry for interrapting you guys. But do you see what are they doing to you. They are creating a smoke screen and they are pretty good with it. They bombard you with a lot of nice ideas which makes sense on what girls like and how beautiful is someone , but what they actually doing they are distracting you from the fact that its 12p. m and that a lpt of drunk 10/10 girls are walking on the street ready to suck your dick. On the other side your writing here and thinking about how your face look instead of banging this girls right now. What am i doing here wtf
Ok so you're argument is that, unattractive men, who women are attracted to are just making up that women aren't attracted to them because they're, in your own words, unattractive. Yeah tell US about cognitive fallacies.
The idea that every man has a chance is mostly just something women love to hang onto to make themselves feel better.
@SpearsAndStones I have no idea what you just said.
@DianaWest A) You're positing a straw-man argument. I didn't say that women weren't allowed to have standards, I said that the original commenter's argument was fallacious. Really don't know where you got that. You're probably not that bright and don't have great informational literacy or reading skills... whoops :/
B) I actually would date women who are overweight and obese, and have tried to date obese women before. Not that many, but you don't fucking know me, so don't talk like you do. Unlike people who think you have a solid argument here, I wouldn't hear one trait about someone (i. e. "300 pounds") and then disqualify them.
@SpearsAndStones By the way... Your comment (the reply to my opinion) was completely nonsensical. Please try again.
@latinabutterfly96
I would date a chubby girl too
@AJC997 Irrelevant.
@latinabutterfly96
It’s not
@SpearsAndStones wow. look at all those intellectual words you are using to display your high level of intelligence. i am truly flabbergasted that you spent so much time consulting the dictionary to mould the perfect response for someone who doesn't actually care as much as you'd hope. i am actually quite bright. i have a 4.0 GPA in a top 20 university. people who attack others' character and suggest erroneous things like "you are not bright" without having any proof are hypocritical. tell me again about the straw man?
@DianaWest There is a lot to unpack here, but I'll start with, if you claim to be intelligent, you DEFINITELY aren't. You still didn't really understand I read. And you don't know what a straw-man argument is, so if you're going to make fun of someone else for having a large vocabulary, you might want to make sure when you try to do the same thing, you use words correctly, otherwise it comes across as SUPER funny when you try to use a word you don't know and then fuck it up right after you told us all about how intelligent you are.
I'm overanalyzing this question... top 20% in terms of achievement, looks, dateability?
I'm assuming dateability
And 80% of women that they want or that want them?
That want them
I dont think that they'd want 80% of the women that want them. That number seems high.
That is one of the points I made above
Ok, I was just stating my opinion after gathering more information.
I was thinking the same
@brittslitt men's standards aren't like women's. The statsitic by the way isn't that 20% of men have 80% of women, but that 20% of men account for 80% of women's sexual encounters. So it's just a bunch of women having sex with the same guys. Not guys who have 80% of women
Opinion
90Opinion
It's more or less true, but you have to understand the context.
The Top 10% of guys HAVE SEX with a big percentage of the Top 60% of women, and occasionally down below that line, but we are strictly talking about casual sex for the most part. I know guys who would bang 3-4 different girls a week - for years and years.
The girls, while most secretly wanted to date those guys (and a few were vocal about it), knew that it wasn't likely to happen - but the guy was still desirable enough to bang him anyway.
Those guys occasionally would date a super hot girl on a regular basis, but most remained single by choice.
The next highest 10% did much the same, except that they didn't get as many of the ultra hot girls and were more likely to be in a relationship (with an 8-9 girl), but again, many remained single by choice and had lots of casual sex with lots of girls.
The problem with this is that a girl who is a 5 or a 6 can get a guy who is a 9 or (occasionally) a 10 to fuck her, so in her mind, she is deserving of no less than an 8 (but really a 9), so she has little interest in guys who are of equal or even slightly higher social market value than herself.
That is why the 80/20 rule exists. Furthermore, women rating men's attractiveness rank more than 70% of men as "below average" - because they know that guys who are 8+ will fuck them, so they inflate their own SMV.
But SMV (for women) is based on "who will DATE you", not "who will fuck you." Men are sexually attracted to 20-30 times as many girls as they are romantically attracted to.
Conversely, SMV for men is based on "who will fuck you" as women and much more picky about that.
Mr. Oracle should have the MHO here. This analysis is spot on. And i know some are going to disagree and say some women aren't this way at all. And they're right. This is a generalization and what Mr. Oracle is saying is generally right. There's always going to be exceptions to every rule. And these women who are the exceptions lack of pickiness typically allows them to find happiness much earlier.
No, I never believed in all that bologna. Most of the guys who believe that stuff are the ones who are mad about not getting dates or sex, and want to create these ridiculous numbers to make themselves feel better about it.
It's a YES in my opinion and here is why:
You are asking this because of that other question?
Anyhow, my answer is still no.
I understand.
I think it's mostly about casual sex than anything else. The average number of partners is 6. Newer studies have showed that millenials are having less sex actually, with 18% of women and 28% of men not having sex within any given year.
You'll also notice that more recently there's a lot of talk about incels. The 18% of women who don't get laid could if they wanted to, they just don't want to for some reason. Men on the other hand mostly want to get laid. Only 1% of people are asexual. A large percentage of that 28% of men will be incels then. Many of them will always be incels. So, the remaining 72% of men are getting laid, and they have an average of 6 partners.
Just because 6 is the average doesn't mean that they're all having 6 each, it's just an average between the men who have 1 sexual partner vs 100+.
There are only a small number of men who are able to get laid regularly with different women. Not that I think it's a good thing, I went through a promiscuous phase myself and it got old pretty quickly. But in order to do that they have to be attractive, have a ton of confidence, good social skills, and a good understanding of female sexuality.
Most guys aren't that confident or attractive, and are mostly confused about women, that's why they're incapable. They rely almost entirely on luck, right place at the right time, that's why when they do get laid they call it "getting lucky". Unlike the guys who have many partners, who understand how to do that, most guys just land in relationships randomly.
Also, when you put it in that way as in 80% vs 20%, that makes it seem like 20% is a tiny number. It's 1-in-5, not that big. It's not actually that hard to get into that "top 20%". Consider this: in the US, 65% of men are overweight. Of the remaining 35%, the majority are also skinny and out of shape. If you lift weights for a couple of years and eat well, build an athletic/muscular physique, and you also dress well (most guys dress like shit) that will put you firmly in the top 20% in terms of physical attractiveness. It's the same with the rest - confidence, social skills etc.
Most guys don't approach women. Go to any bar or club and just watch. Most single guys stand by the sidelines clutching a beer to their chests, talking to their friends about which girls they think are hot, but they do nothing. Only a small number have the confidence to approach a girl. Out of those guys, an even smaller number has the confidence to actually make a move on a girl he likes. Many will just stand there nervously making friendly, platonic conversation, and will maybe ask for her number - which will often be a fake one to get rid of him.
So I'd say it's true for that. When it comes to relationships however, this isn't the case or else most guys would be incels and they're obviously not.
@Thotkiana
A gentleman doesn't discuss his sex life with those he's not involved with.
Yes, it's a fact that 80% of women are chasing 15% of the top alpha men.
The rest of everybody is standing on the sidelines waiting for something to happen.
Worse, the women think if they bed that hot alpha guy - fukboyz - they can snag him for herself. Which doesn't work cuz he gets all the pussy he can handle and there's no reason to commit to one.
But now she thinks her smv has improved cuz hot fukboy did her so now she's 'not going to settle' and spurns any number of perfect suitors that may be a very suitable mate - she's hoping to actually find one like the fukboy.
If they do this long enough they hit the wall and now have to compete with women much younger and prettier - the longer this goes on the worse her chances are actually landing a quality guy - the high-value guys aren't looking for a used up cock-carousel rider. She screws herself in the process.
And here you have all the rest of the 85% of guys whining about the fukboyz and why don't the women go for them instead of these alpha dogs.
It's a cruel world out there in the dating pool.
Ummmm after much pondering I say No.
After a while, many women (including myself I will admit) will want something more of substance no matter the money looks, power. Not to mention, I don't think there will ever be a deep sense of trust. It will be like dating a batman or Hollywood mobster but far less dreamy cause you know
reality sucks sometimes. Once the anime eyes light dies. so does the relationship. I have dated a few wells off guys and I felt more like a "person" they needed to call when they have to show off to family and friends. You know to show just how successful they are at everything (rolls eyes here)
I also have talked to a lot of older females who have dated some big shots and they say it was fun at first but it lost its appeal and they marry the opposite.
"Once the anime eyes light dies. so does the relationship."
This was a hilarious line.
I think that these women are not learning that lesson early enough. Women are incredibly beautiful in their early years and it's a lose for everyone (except the players) if they waste it pursuing men that won't produce a serious relationship.
@Monster_Recluse thanks,
I can agree with you on that note too.
I will always prefer a deep minded person since Im capable of taking care of myself. So It very much so possible they were also dating the guys for their shallow reasons as well. Some did get condos/houses/cars out of it lol
@chris_987 Yeah pretty much but hopefully the decent honest guys who was always overlooked in their 20's worked on themselves and got ahead in life by the time they hit 30, then go for 20 year olds fuck going with a women similar age in your 30's as they will most likely be single mums with a baby daddy issues and won't look as good so why be with them when you hit your prime while they overlooked you in their prime?
@chris_987 I think it's about how you were raised, if you were educated and trained in ethics you'll not sell yourself short. Women who sell themselves as commodities don't think they have anything to offer but their beauty/body. They are likely not well enough educated to acquire good jobs or informed enough to seek alternate careers, training. It's easy, they think, to be taken care of. Yet, they may not know what they've missed out on in the bargain.
@chris_987 There's all kinds of work. Maybe his "work" is unpaid or unmarketable. Maybe it enhances their mutual home while she drags in significant bucks. Maybe it's homemaking and child rearing on top of his "work."
YES AND NO.
YES because evolution is a competition, most if not all women are going to look for the strongest, healthiest, best looking and most providing male to breed with just like most if not all men are going to look for the prettiest and healthiest young women to bare their offspring.
NO because there's nothing that really determines who the top 20% are, and even then I don't think most women are specifically searching for them. Most women aren't specifically looking for the strongest, wealthiest and best looking man on the planet, but most are looking for a man who is strong, good looking and has a stable income.
I think they're more likely to be players and most would date a middle class woman because men biologically and socially aren't that concerned about a woman's resources. I do agree that most can get 80% of women and 98% if he's in the top 5% with money and looks included
Men will become more unattractive as a disposable resource provider as machines and computers replace men as laborers. Men think women find them attractive no women find men useful. Did the male slave owners find the female slaves attractive probably but what was more important? The means of production. So women see you as willing sharecroppers and the gynocentric courts are the jim crow laws. Do women have it fair in the first world nations no but they have a slap on the wrist by a ruler and the men get to break rocks in a chain gang. Once the rich elite can publicly become transhuman and live without human labor women will be seen as equal to men disposable. The woman can be replaced by a machine artificial wombs. The men can be replaced by robots. So muh vagina and my fee fees good luck believing that humping rich men is going to save you from extinction.
It can sure seem that way if you live in a very small town. But reality a kind of bigger than that, and people who believe that bullshit are usually dudes who just don’t want to put in the work to be or go after better.
It's about the same the other way around.
The funny thing is the 80% rarely get anyone of the 20% since they doesn't have what's needed to get them no matter gender. The 20% tends to choose one of 20% that aren't obsessed about to get them before they get real connection. with other words they doesn't choose people that are attracted to shallowness for instance physical or status. that means that the majority of humans are shallow as fuck but aren't aware of their own shallowness.
If the numbers are accurate or not doesn't really matter since it's a representation of the majority.
Some logical problems with this proposition. Firstly, the demographic distribution (of any area) does not support this hypothesis. Secondly, for this to be true, the rest of the men and women would have to be single. That's obviously not true, either.
Perhaps, you mean to ask whether the top 20% of guys have the potential of 'getting' 80% of the women. In that case, yes, quite trivial, too.
No, I meant to ssk exactly that becsuse it's an oft-repeated maxim.
I think they get the most attention by women... by the time a woman realizes he’s too in demand she has moved onto a family man with dad bod that is actually an amazing guy. 🤷🏾♀️ for a short while i think women do tend to go after the “it” guy... I never bothered he was out of my grasp and I knew it.
Yes they do, and its their choice whether they want to sleep with them or date them but nevertheless, they do attract 80% of women of course
why wouldn't a 5/10 girl be attracted to a 9/10 man...
he may not choose her, but she still would go with him if he did choose her
so what happens is lets say a 9/10 man, he will get his fair share of 9/10 girls, maybe some 10's probably too... but he will also sometimes go for 7/10... maybe 6/10... for variety, to sleep with.. I've seen it. Not all hot guys always want all 10's
It’s a bit of an exaggeration. It’s also specific to a context.
In a population where all sex is casual hookups something like that happens.
When all sex is in monogamous relationships that last for life it’s much closer to 1-1 matching.
When behaviour falls between the two something between the two happens. Men are more likely to have more than one friends with benefits. Successful men are more likely to remarry (hence having multiple partners serially rather than simultaneously). Etc.
Well for one thing those numbers come from dating site statistics so maybe they dont act on it 100% but that is how dating interest is divided. You're also giving those 20% of guys way too much credit for 1: having high standards and 2: being honest with women about what number they are. The 20% might not be seeking relationships with the 80%, but they'll happily give them one night stands all through their 20s.
Well, it’s about attraction for any given reason.
I think it’s pretty high, in that women are more desired by men than men are by women. This could be an issue if standards, maybe, but I’m
unsure.
Women shift in paradigm as they age/have children usually.
However, in modern dynamics, have you ever noticed how many women just want friends? While at the same time how many of a certain kind of man keeps many female friends?
This probably has some correlation.
This question is put 'to the world', so the answers especially if they're in-depth could be interesting, as in my opinion your reason depends on age, your question does as well, (As well as other aspects such as culture, environment, beliefs etc).
Your comments are spot on. The hard, cold reality of the last US census is there are roughly 2 to 3 percent more females. On the other hand there are 4% more males than females in Costa Rica for example. In major urban US population centers there are even a higher percentage of females. So even if you look like Shrek, you can find a girl as long as you're not too picky. Like you said age is a factor too. I live in a sunbelt community with lots of retirees. Here, if you're average looking guy, can still get it up, and have even a small amount of money, you're buried in females. I get hit on at least once every couple of weeks. And I am definitely not one of those 20% alphas. I'm a fit, strong, and friendly beta, and I get all the girls I want.
@Wally48: its well known that at your age the balanced is tipped in favor of males, but youve hivrn misleading stats. Women are outnumbered by men in the US until the late 30s, so during the vast majority of their childbearing years there is a surplus of men. Telling a guy in his 20s or 30s that there is a surplus of retired women isn't going to do anything for him, or even a guy my age.
Do you find at your age there is a shortage of women? The US census I reviewed didn't have an age breakout. I'll go look some more because it's an interesting subject. Actually the only two States that had more men cumulatively was Wyoming and Alaska. And yes us old guys have an advantage. But college guys do too. More women than men in college now.
@Wally48: more girls in college, but they are more also more likely to be adult students with kids, plus college girls can date guys who aren't in college and are working full-time; that said, t
you're right that it's the best place for a young guy to meet girls. Also, for almost all guys, a single mother is less desirable than a woman with no kids.
The Census Bureau breaks it out by age cohort.
I haven't tried meeting women in their 40s here in the US because I moved here to be with my thirtysomething girlfriend, who is a real gem. I had no luck meeting women my age in Germany because I have three kids, and that is a dealbreaker there.
@Wally48 Betas are probably more relaxed and plenty of alphas are dead by your age. Betas win in the long haul. I've met some alphas. Worked with some. Betas are always better men. Here's my celebrity Beta theory. George Clooney and Brad Pitt are betas. Both have chosen strong, attractive women who did not need them and they let their women run the show. This doesn't mean they don't have THEIR own show. But their show doesn't interfere with their woman's. Clooney, as Alpha handsome and strong looking as he is, is soft spoken and has played in endearing, self-deprecating comedies. Alphas never make fun of themselves. They are perenially serious. Pitt has played many strong leading men, but also crazies, 12 Monkeys, idiots, Inglorious Basterds, War Machine... He's played parodies of alphas in many comedic and and comedy drama roles... Clooney's done the same. Alphas never make mistakes. Betas learn to roll with the punches. Betas laugh, alphas grimace. Top dogs die young. No. 2 takes their place after they die when the stress is so low, they just ride the remaining wave. Betas are always easygoing men with warm smiles and hearts. Alphas are always trying to squash Betas. But they step aside for the Alpha tirades and stomach ulcers and heart attacks and strokes. Betas are better. My prejudiced theory and personal insight.
well, that depends on what you're asking for.
Trophy wives — yep, easy peasy for them
New one nights stands everyday — I can't see why not
Women want to date, doesn't care much if he's a player — well, certainly
High status attracts billions. Millions of them are just golddiggers... so in terms of love, I don't think they have it easy or anything. In fact if I were one of them, I'd for 200% sure have been going through trust issues,'does she love me, or my power, wealth and status?'
This is based on a single article from Tinder algorithm rankings. Since guys tend to be thirstier, the top 80% of women have higher ratings than the bottom 80% of men. While there definitely is a lot of mismatch, this is largely an idea pushed by incels blaming society for their problems.
Well, regardless of what anybody thinks or feels, that is exactly what all the data shows to be the case.
@Unit1 Learn how to Google, you sad sack. Quit expecting people to hold your hand.
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I think it has some truth to it although it would only apply to casual sex and I don't know of I would say it's 80/20.
I think guys are overall less selective than women are when it comes to casual sex than women are and that the distribution of casual hookups is more evenly spread on the female side while for men it is probably more skewed towards the more conventionally desirable guys getting most of the casual sex.
Now a guy who is an 8 probably isn't going to hookup with a girl who is a 2 or 3 but I think a lot of them are willing to sleep with 5s or 6s if its just a one night stand of if she's a side chick. At least they are more willing to do so than a girl who is an 8 would be to hookup with a guy who is a 5 or 6.
I think the top 20% speaking in terms of looks and dominance character traits are the ones 98% of girls want to fuck. Strictly fuck. I think the other 80% are the ones girls want to make babies with and play house with.
I think ideally they want a guy who is attractive, is dominant in personality AND is a good provider, potential father and life partner. However it’s often difficult to find a good blend between the to so they will opt for the typical pussy whipped “nice” guy type to settle down with. You know.. the agreeable and attentive guy. But to fuck... well Conan the Barbarian or some super stud is who makes their pussies wet and who they crave for raw sex appeal.
In Ancient Rome... women would literally pay top dollar to fuck gladiators. The typical “alpha” (god I cringe using that word, but must for lack of better terms) male.
No different for guys. There’s Ms. Right, and Ms. Right Now.
What a lot of people think of top men and top women aren’t really top at all.
Quite true
This is legit called the Zipf Mystery and it applies to pretty much everything.
So yes it is legit.
Pareto's law (80/20) rule only applies to the sexual market place and not long term dating/relationships. It's only true when it comes to friends with benefits and ONS because females chase after all the physically hot guys for sex. That's where your inequality is because you have Chad's plate spinning many harems of females in his social circle.
I think even that is not accurate.
How so? You do have the females who are in relationships and the other females (bottom 20%) who are unattractive to the top 20%.
There's still a huge imbalance in the sexual market place. They're just rough estimates
You've misquoted the statistic. It's "20% of guys have 80% of the sex", which I do believe is true. The best, most successful men get laid more than the average dude, however I also think the girls who'd fuck them with no strings attached are likely getting passed around between that 20%. In other words it stands to reason that the same 20% of guys is fucking the same 20% of girls en masse more often than most people in their daily relationships.
No. The math does not work out. Of that were true than bery few men would get married.
God is merciful - I have seen guys that make Shrek look handsome. Guys who are poor , weird, unemployed, have funny habits. Guys older than me with very limited experience. Yet by the grace of God they pull.
Yes , If you look good and have money it is very easy. But the idea that you have to be rich and Brad Pitt to get any pussy at all is an incel idea.
It's more of a generalization actually, but the theory exists as some indication of the world we are or are becoming.
It's also more generational, you say your age is 42 and a lot of these young men who grew up are now 18-20-somethings or even 30-somethings.
@UncleJessieRabbit Do you mean that the concept of an incel is a generational thing?
There have always been men who were chronically non-celibate or unhappily without a person, but it seems that it exacerbated into a bigger epidemic since at least my generation or so. But who knows, I guess.
@UncleJessieRabbit I think so.
Young men don't approach women these days. I think it is all the video games and also the fear of some sexual harassment claim.
No, I don't think so. They tend to be picky about who they date and their personality is usually "meh" so they scare away that 80% of women. In reality, people date within their status, wether it is socially, professionally, emotionally, financially or a mix of them.
Everyone knows the average woman is receiving hundreds of matches on apps like Tinder. The average man only receives 3-6 in a week if he comes off as interesting. If you're in that top 20% of men who make the most money and are the best looking, you will receive more matches and have many more sexual options to choose from. This is true whether you're on a dating app or talking to women in person. Women like attractive men who can provide for them.
The 80/20 rule is about sex and it's clear to anyone with eyeballs that it's true.
Actually it is true and I brought proof.
www.yourtango.com/.../women-find-80-percent-men-unattractive-says-crazy-study
medium.com/.../tinder-experiments-ii-guys-unless-you-are-really-hot-you-are-probably-better-off-not-wasting-your-2ddf370a6e9a
Link 1 was busted, corrected below:
medium.com/.../tinder-experiments-ii-guys-unless-you-are-really-hot-you-are-probably-better-off-not-wasting-your-2ddf370a6e9a
Attractiveness is always a relative term. Buf A survey showed 80% of men are unattractive according to women. We could call it unbalanced based on how it was done. www.yourtango.com/.../women-find-80-percent-men-unattractive-says-crazy-study
Lmao according to that theory 80% of women AND 80% of men would constantly be single which simply isn’t the case. So no. It’s obviously complete shit.
They eventually settle. But 80% of women desire and chase the 20%
@StickStickity13 lmao or so you tell yourself so you can sleep at night..
Nothing to do with me, but the data speaks for itself...
@StickStickity13 “the data” ahahahah and next you’re gonna post a little tinder statistic?
The top 20% of men get the sex from 80% of the women. It's not a bad thing, but it makes a lot of sense.
It’s about 65% of African-American women. Too high, yes. But not 85%.
My god, please go outside y’all
@chris_987 exactly..
I would but the outdoors are dangerous. :(
What about the cheating crossover?
www.google.com/.../nearly-1-in-3-american-men-aged-18-29-didnt-have-sex-in-2018%3f_amp=true
Not yet but it will happen soon enough at this rate.
@Stevied93 So men are now experiencing dry spells at the same rate as women? Wow, that really proves.. what does that prove again I’m lost as to why you’d post that here?
@chris_987 seems like I just burst your bubble? Welcome to reality, buddy
@chris_987 Men pay for sex from prostitutes. Women who are not prostitutes are not engaging in sex to simply have sex. That's the difference between men and women. Women who are not sex workers do not engage in sex willy nilly. Some men will pay to do so rather than go without. Women in general would rather not jeopardize their reputations. The double standard is alive and well.
Well the reason why Certain men pay for prostitutes is because they can’t get sex from women. So they have to pay for it. Women can get sex from both men and women without any money being exchanged. The only reason why women don’t go around trying to get sex from men is because they don’t want that they want a relationship. And In order for a women to get a relationship she has to have a man show love for her first. So if having a relationship is something you can’t force then women won’t get that, but they can get sex easier than a man which is my point.
@Screenwriter “Women who are not sex workers do not engage in sex willy nilly.” Whhhhyyyy not? That’s so frustrating.
@Robertcw Even with the best protection, there is the threat of pregnancy. The double standard still exists. A woman who sleeps around is not a stud, she's a whore. And an UNPAID one. More denigration. Engaging in random sex exposes one to STDs that could impact fertility. Sex is more of a pair bonding endeavor for women because they are child bearers. Women's bodies urge them to remain pregnant to keep the race going. Men are wham bang because they are "seeders." Does anyone want to sleep with someone who has hundreds of notches in their belts? It sounds like they don't and can't connect, and that sex is their only goal. Sounds pretty shallow and emotionally bankrupt.
I believe it's true that 20% of the guys are having 80% of the sex, and there is a solid evolutionary reason why. Are 20% of the guys getting 80% of the women? I think it depends on age. Young women can be very choosey on what men they want to date/have sex with, but as women get older their attractiveness fades and are forced to lower their standards if they want to have sex or date (if they're not already tied down), especially as men's attractiveness stays pretty much the same for most of their life
Do you mean the top 20% of men get the bottom 80% or that 20% of men are successful and can attract 80% of women?
Presumably the top 80%
In some aspects, but not entirely. People are unlike animals as we have many other qualitied to go about rather than who is the strongest, fastest, who has the best plumage or most majestic horns; we are far more diverse and selecting a mate based solely on physical appearances is almost never done. So, the top 20% would need to bring a lot more to the table for them to be able to pull 80% of women.
Whether or not they get 80% of the women, they certainly have access to 80% of the women. The top 20% of men probably don't want 80% of the women. They probably want the top 20% of women, but they could easily have any of 80% of women in the blink of an eye.
80%, no way. That's a myth. Top tier dudes usually have some very good looking men, but they aren't getting 50% of women much less 80% of them.
I'll say top tier dudes who are single get around maybe 25% to 30% of women to sleep with them.
While lower tier dudes get about the same rate, probably a bit less but the women aren't as good looking as the ones the top tier dudes sleep with.
No. Say there's a hypothetical world with 100 men and 100 women. I just don't buy that 20 men are going to be romantically/ sexually involved with 80 of the women. That might be plausible in 19th century Utah but not as a general proposition.
Yes...
people are highly hypergamic, not only women.
Attractive women will tell you horror stories about weird admiration of less attractive guys as well.
Maybe "... get 80% of the women" is the wrong term, what you get is their attention that you sometimes don't want.
I think you need to re-word your question. It's not that the tp 20% of guys get 80 % of the women. It's that 80% of the women are only interested in the top 20% of guys. So it would depend on what you mean by "get". If she would rather be a "side chick" than accept what she deems to be a " lesser man" than rhe answer to your question is yes.
That statistic is never framed like that. It's not that the top 20% get or want the top 80% of the women. It's that the top 80% of the women are only interested in what they perceive as the top 20% of the men.
It would 80 % of men be single, while women would be at 20 %. The dating game is hard, but not that hard
Not exactly.
Men are attracted to maybe around 50% of women +/-10%.
Women however are attracted to the top 20% of men. Or so it seems.
And hey, I'm not making it up but money attracts them and you'll always be able to resort to gold diggers if you otherwise aren't popular among the ladies.
No. I've found that most highly attractive guys don't have a matching personality. Younger girls are probably more inclined at first but after a while they'll want someone who treats them well.
Sure, but by then the damage has been done. Let’s say we’re talking 18-22 age range.
Then, let’s say 80% (or realistically, 60%) are crushing on 20% (or realistically 40%) of peer male college students.
Let’s compare freshman year experiences:
Desirable guy might have 25 sexual partners freshman year. Average guy probably has 0-2 Average girl probably has 14 or something in between.
Because of this, I believe many women grow up not realizing that not everyone is having 10+ sexual partners in college. It’s an issue of privilege due to the inherent way nature stacked the deck at birth.
So then we go online and share our experience and women react in disbelief as if what average guys are saying is appalling — because it doesn’t match their own personal experiences. But that’s precisely the point.
Accidentally voted yes, but I honestly don't think so.
Maybe, maybe not. But either way there is a huge discrepancy in ease of effort. Case in point.
All she had to do was be like “oh what a coincidence... (follow)... PM.”
Give me a break man. Check your privilege girls.
How do you put a percentile on a other human being? If we're talking about standardized testing then that makes sense, but I assmue we are in the context as how "good" people are. In that sense, I don't think people should be putting other people in percentile distributions.
I'm comfused
Are you asking if the top 20% of men can choose any woman they want..
Well of course, they have no problem dating as their options are endless
They can definitely get 80% of women, if not more
Update: But again 80% of women aren't single
Plus each woman has different standards. Most women are looking for a meaningful LTR relationship, not looks or power or money
Values>money&looks
Therefore, I'm changing my initial answer to no
I'm pretty sure he's not asking about long term relationships. The top 20% of men can have pretty much whatever woman he wants. The other 80% are flawed and therefore they struggle. Women look for and focus on flaws.
At first, the whole equation is built on the level of hype and lust, (picture of a man chased by a bunch of women) while some men take advantage of this situation to profit socially and sexually, the rest fall back helpless yet it slightly changes over the years when women realize they can no longer do it due to aging and their need to accomplish stability.
Of course not.. It would be silly to think that.. Most guys can get a girl if they have charisma, ambition, humor, and confidence..
I do think that the more attractive men get more women.
The good news is that he can only fuck one or two at a time usually.
There's always room for average guys to get some pussy here and there.
I have read this many times so I believe it's true. Women have ridiculously high standards.
Top 10% maybe get 90% of attractive women and then the top 20% get maybe 60% of the women etc.
Has something to do with competition among women themselves.
The top 20% men get 100% of the women cause those men are top so women who want the best things and best people would automatically be attracted
Then most men would be single and virgins, wow this is such a stupid theory.
@AJC997 then there wouldn’t be 8 billion people on earth. I can’t belive you guys are that stupid. I definitely believe that on average women are smarter than men
A study was done that showed the average man had a higher body count than the average woman. If that’s true obviously this crap top % theory is false.
@AJC997 can you not read?
www.google.com/.../nearly-1-in-3-american-men-aged-18-29-didnt-have-sex-in-2018%3f_amp=true
I'm pretty sure this is on an increase in other Western countries as well just food for thought :)
@AJC997 Average looks and intelligence will get you dates. Above average personality and manners will ASSURE you will date until there is nothing left of you but bones. If you survive to old age and never marry, you will have 10 women to your one you. NEVER DATELESS.
@Screenwriter
Thank you. I’m going to try to be more social and outgoing but it’s hard because of my voice
@AJC997 the pity party is annoying. You see average and ugly men and women get dates.
@AJC997 you’re definitely throwing a pity party. Only person that’s stopping you from getting a date is you
@AJC997 First the nose or plastic surgery, NOW the voice. You have got to give up on this incessant self criticism. Unless you SQUEAK or talk like MIchael Jackson, I'm sure your voice is within normal parameters..
@Screenwriter
You’re right. No it’s kind of hard to hear me but it’s fine, it’s not that bad, and I can be heard if I really really want to. But I don’t want to be in pity anymore
This doesn't account for long term dating and relationships though... just the sexual market place. That AJ can find a girlfriend easily if he just gets the right mindset
I've just told you lol... friends with benefits and one night stands. You also have the females who are in relationships who also don't cheat, then the rest of the single women having sex with the top 20% but the bottom 20% of females don't get Chad and you're the one chasing landwhales unfortunately.
Tbh everyone has a chance of getting a lover if they want to
If that where true 80% of guys would have no woman.
@AJC997 Certainly in your age range.
@Screenwriter
Ouch. And I am not even ugly
@AJC997 That statement simply means MANY young men and women are single. It is no judgement against their quality as people. People hook up later in life. In their mid and late twenties to their 30s in general.
@Screenwriter
Well I said guys and you said certainly in your age range so I took it to mean you just thought guys were single
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