Why don't men want women anymore like our Grandfathers did?

Question

DracoVenandi · Accepted Answer

Well just in general women back in the day dressed conversationally, acted conservatively, held jobs but didn't necessarily seek equal pay or male professions, didn't really entertain the idea of divorce, didn't really sleep around or with anyone that happened to buy them a beer, were more prone to be stay-at-homes, depending on the decade & country had neither the right to vote or even directly own their own property, supported the concept of feminism with respect to equality rather than the increasingly modern idea of hypocrisy (don't understand modern feminism whatsoever), etc. The list of differences is quite long.

In many ways - not the lack of rights mind you - as a conservative woman with a lot of self-respect myself if I were a man I wouldn't want much to do with a number of modern women either.

jennifer_bloom · Accepted Answer

I think in previous times marriage was certain - woman stayed loyal - men stayed loyal - woman listened to men - men listened to woman - both men and woman agreed on who would work and who would care for the kids and do house chores - now both are trying to do both and there is fighting over it.

Exterminatore · Accepted Answer

I think when women can start acting like our grandmothers did - like women instead of men and when a lot of legislation is passed revising divorce laws and other injustices men suffer at the hands of women, then you’ll see the marriage rate increase.

Until such time the pickings for a good one are exceedingly slim.

Don’t really give a rats ass who I upset, men want sandwich makers, baby makers, and women that tend to be more submissive rather than overbearing cunts who are obsessed with their own fulfillment and weaponized by legislation that discriminated against men from the work place to the divorce courts. Men like women not women who try to act like men and do a poor job of it. That’s what most men want. That’s what I want. That’s what I got and I wouldn’t settle for less.

Why don't men want women anymore like our Grandfathers did?

ImJustCurious13 · Accepted Answer

1. The quality of women went down.
Our Grandfathers got to choose from women like this:

While today we have women like this:

2. The quality of men went down
Yes I'm going to shit on men too. Our Grandfathers might have been something like this:

While today's men are like this:

3. Dating isn't dating anymore
Our grandparents went on actual dates while we hookup and have sex before we even learn each other's name and see if it leads anywhere after that. Also our grandparents were actually looking for a partner while people today seem to be looking for a fuck buddy to live with them.

I could probably name more reason but you get the gist of it.

sejla · Answer

It's a choice these men make.

The way people think and the beliefs they hold reflects outwardly and to a certain degree what we reflect is what we get back.

Marriage isn't an societal obligation any more in most places so men can make the choice to not be tied down if they so chose.

There is negativity on both sides women and men. It starts to make interactions more combative then they need to be. Too many quick judgments that might not be correct.

Divorce can go smoothly with a degree of decorum or it can become a free for all. It is hard to choose the degree of decorum especially in cheating situations (not my situation) but it is better to bow out with some grace even if you have to bit your lip and scream in the car in the country instead of wanting to tap your soon to be ex on the head for arguing with the basic child support amount that is set by the state. I digress.

Like a friend of mine says who got cheated on... when it is over it's over. That is from someone who is very religious and was with her spouse for 30 years. If we took the end less personal (yes I know that is hard to do and I didn't understand that then) then maybe people wouldn't be scared to start relationships again.

Feminism isn't a bad word. If it wasn't for feminism some women would have to stay with their abusive husbands, wouldn't be able to vote in the U. S. or drive cars, would get paid less then men consistently and could get fired if they got pregnant. Feminism was just about allowing women to chose to work or stay home with the kids. The outcome of the feminist movement was to allow men the opportunity to have a more active role in raising their kids making the bond of fathers with their children even stronger than before. I won't get into if the movement has changed or has gone too far because the things I talk about are about feminism going back to the early 1900s up until 2000.

Maybe women do think they need men less. It has too sides. Some women have given up because they have seen too many men not step up when times get tough. These men are fine when everything is smoothly going along and maybe their girlfriend or wife keep all the balls in the air so they in turn have a good life but when the girlfriend or wife stumbles, gets depressed, get sick or really needs help these men just aren't up to the job.

On the other hand some women won't rely on a man at all and say I can do everything myself while other women put way too many demands on their men. I mean demands that exceed what is necessary whether it be financial, emotional, whatever. Sometimes just simple things financially, emotionally, etc. are the best. Every day care is way better than over the top romance. Both these paragraphs create a situation where women decide they don't need a man because either he won't follow through or there is no way they can either meet her needs.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Well thought out answer: Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

davids88 · Answer

One main reason is the way men lose a lot when getting divorced. But porn sites, Youtube videos that teach guys to pick up as many girls as possible like it's some kind of game and apps like Tinder have completely changed the way young boys look at girls and the way girls view sex. From the age of around 14 if they grow up watching porn, then sex becomes like something they can get easily and it won't mean much to them.

Then when they are 18 they start watching all these videos of pick up artists and start using apps like Tinder to hook up with as many girls as they can. By the time they are 30 either they have had sex with over 20 partners or they will at least hear so many stories of their friends hooking up with so many partners. This changes the way they look at sex and relationships and it becomes something like a joke to them. So it is not just guys that are responsible for marriage rates going down but girls should take 50% of the responsibility. If every country completely lost access to internet then things would change a lot. But it will never happen. So I only expect the marriage rates to go down and the hookup culture to continue.

Silent_Bob · Answer

You’re painting a VERY rose-tinted picture of previous generations; there was some serious values dissonance going in their time. Go back to say, 1960 and earlier, women in marriages were borderline indentured servants, though we were not as bad as Japan and Victorian England in that regard. Men were slaves, too, albeit in a different way: they were expected to work themselves to an early grave so their wives could stay home (there was MORE equality when society was agricultural, farmers worked from home, after all). Many kids barely knew their fathers, because they were pulling double overtime to put the SONS through college. The fact that we outgrew this and realized that two people working 40 hours is better than one MAN busting his ass working 80 hours until he had his first heart attack at 52 (fatal ones 30% of the time).

That said, there are still some serious growing pains.

Women were the first to realize that one has to be happy with oneself before they brought someone else into the mix. Men have started to embrace this mindset more recently (partially to keep their guard up against gold diggers and “stalkers with test tubes”). Many women have had trouble adapting to this, as they still expect men to do all the work, make the first move, etc. So once more women get their heads out of the sand of the old traditions, things will even out.

LogicBomber · Answer

Generally men are tired of the bullshit childishness that women have become.
The false victim nonsense, the blaming men for everything, the complete lack of taking responsibility for their own actions and choices, the constant attempts to change who we are or stop us from doing all the things we love and enjoy, the nagging, etc.

Also society has poisoned the male female dynamic by spoiling the females at the expense of men, treated us like we are here for the protection and use of females.
The divorce bias against us, the court bias against us, the complete lack of parental rights, the lack of punishment against violent females who make up HALF of domestic violence offenders and 71% of non-reciprocated violence.

Women have essentually poisoned the broth with their narasism, entitlement, and childishness. Men are tired of the constant blame for the actions of a few.

That being said, there are a smaller number of women who are still amazing but the mass over runs the few and until women start actually start fighting back against these parasitic females, they are going to fall into the same bucket.

BlackRoseFairy · Answer

Society has changed a LOT since that time.
Back in my grandparents era women didn't have anything else to do than getting married - to someone they didn't choose - and serve him and his children (the sons that is, since daughters were still seen as a minority)
Now things are much different. And it is not all to blame on feminism, even a woman that doesn't share feminist views still has to work for a living, pay her bills, has less time on her hands, etc.
So there are many factors that have influenced human relationships along with other things.
And taking in mind that men back in that era often had no feelings for the girls they took - and I say girls because many of them married at a much younger age than today - often their motives were based on profit alone (her heirloom etc), and they treated their wifes - and subsequently their homes - with disrespect, like they owned them, I am glad that men don't want women the same way anymore.
Because I would rather be with someone who has real feelings for me and doesn't see me as a profit.

lucian_lucian_123 · Answer

The women changed a lot their behavior influenced by current family laws and by the marxist extremist political movement named feminism. All the laws regarding family are against men for a very long time now. Is really a very bad thing for any man to make a family. If you have the bad luck to have a crazy wife, your life can be destroyed forever. You can be ANYTIME accused of "marital rape " by a jealous of upset wife and have your life destroyed. I really don't know how exactly a court can establish if is rape and not revenge, the two being one to one in house. The women are never responding for false accusations, not telling the man public image cannot be ever repaired even if he wins at court. More recently ANY man ANYTIME can be accused of RAPE because he hasn't the condom on, while his girlfriend asked for that. You eventually can accuse him of something else but not of rape. The rape act is a very precise and well defined crime. Not putting the condom cannot be anytime a rape act. The law itself is a high abuse and wrong defined from start. In plus, they are one to one, how can a court establish if the girl or woman is telling the truth or not? what if she is doing a revenge? In plus there is the feminism that are fighting openly against men as human beings and against their rights. They are publicly telling that "men are a rapist gender", "we are living in a rapist society", and things even much worse than that, some of them good just for the psychiatric hospital. Still nobody, no woman, and especially no authority is not telling anything about this Marxist extremist political movement.

DorkVader · Answer

One of my grandfather's was a dirty stomp-around who stepped out on my grandma and had a "secret" child and she stayed with him. The other grandfather used to beat my other grandma until she threatened to shoot him once he started in on the kids. What great times those were. I view this question with cynicism because as far as I can tell, the only thing different about the women was their willingness to put up with a bunch of shit because their options were limited because they were scared of what others would think. They didn't have happier or better or more balanced relationships. They just didn't talk about it. It's a wonder you could walk in their houses without tripping over all the bullshit swept under the rug

NerdInDenial · Answer

Men still continue to desire women; women's career aspirations have narrowed down their dating pool size. Women desire men who have greater incomes or higher education than them, but that's not the trend. So, it's not men; maybe, just maybe it's women's expectations.

www.psychologytoday.com/.../is-shortage-desirable-men-blame-fewer-marriages

Sharlet1 · Answer

Because times have changed. Men are now free to be who they truly are. They are not forced to love women who they have no interest in. Men can now be gay /bi/ transgender who cares. And how many men can honestly say they want life long partnerships and are willing to put in the time and effort to maintain them?

yucychan · Answer

Back in my grandparents' times, most people get married for the sake of getting married. There wasn't any courtship or mentioning of love etc. Most marriages were match-made, they were just expected to marry, start a family and raise kids.
Things were way simpler, each had their own responsibility. The husband is just to be the breadwinner and the wife is just to give birth, take care of kids.
They may not started out with love for each other but they definitely will end with love for their children and grandchildren.
But today, most women make their own choices, not conformed to society's expectations. Women want to realize their dreams as well. And some don't want to settle and start a family. Some women don't want kids.
So I don't think it's that men don't want women anymore. It's just that there aren't many women left who are like our grandmothers.

Sammy6Gunz · Answer

Everything nowadays is designed to make thingd easier for us and in this case its made things so easy that it's so so hard not to get complacent. We see movies and hear stories of romantic times and grand gestures being made that has us all smiling stupidly and tearing up.

But it's not lost, we just have to follow their guidelines, to work for what you want, to not let an opportunity pass by, to strive for what you want.

Yes they were 'made of different stuff' back then but we have let technology make everything too easy for us. We can all get that, each and every one of us, we just have to try.

Grande_Beefy_Swirl · Answer

Because this isn't 1952, my guy. The idea of what a "man" or "woman" even is doesn't really mean anything.
A man from Japan has vastly different expectations than a man from America. There is no ONE answer as to what a "man" is supposes to be or how they're supposed to act.
People are finally realising that all of these social expectations are Bullshit and that what matters is the desire to limit the suffering of others as much as possible rather than constantly judging everyone for not meeting your arbitrary standard.

NineBreaker · Answer

I think there are a few of reasons, but the biggest one is this: Risk vs. Reward. Men naturally tend to take more risks in more situations than women (courtesy of testosterone). However, the societal dynamics today, men do not perceive rewards that are worth the associated risks in being in a relationship. Divorce rates are high, and false accusations of sexual misconduct do happen, and they may be big deterrents for some.

I'm not discussing whether or not such perceptions of risk by men are true; I'm saying that enough of them have these perceptions, and that affects factors into that risk/reward calculation.

Unit1 · Answer

The quality of women in the general context has degraded. Plus my experience is that women don't want relationships.

zephyr27 · Answer

Because women used to be seen more like property, and she couldnt get rid of him. Back in the day, they'd put in all the effort, make their "investment" and then when he got her she would always be with him. Now women can leave, they can be more selective, parents have less influence on their choices, and less women are tolerating being beaten. The past and these photos may be over-romanticized too because you totally still see people bonding, having a good time, and putting technology away to be with someone today.

TheLawAroundHere · Answer

What are u talking about? My grandma worked 40 hrs a week, raised 3 kids, kept the house and helped on the farm. Also, she was the prettiest thing in 3 counties. Why wouldn't any man want that?

Lightning8 · Answer

Guys that want to be married or even serious within about the first month or so are seen today as desperate, or having nothing else going on in their lives. This is particularly if they don't earn somewhere around an upper middle class salary or don't have a lot of friends. So what does he do? He focuses on other things, or at the very least makes it seem that way.

It's not so much men's fault in this respect; [without outside restrictions] women are the arbiters of what the relationship between a man and a woman looks like. A woman's smile is literally that of natural selection to a man. And it is actually quite a powerful thing to be the face of natural selection. Godlike even.

Liam_Hayden · Answer

We do, but the rules have changed. Our grandfathers traded lifetime financial security for faithful virgins under a system that allowed divorce for abuse, adultery, and little else. Now we are still expected to trade the same for women who've had more traffic than the Holland Tunnel and who often have the faithfulness of the average alley cat in heat under a system where the cheater can divorce the innocent and still be entitled to half of everything plus a chunk of future earnings. Until at least the rules are changed back, I wouldn't hold my breath on a major reversal here..

ToastyTimothy1828 · Answer

Women aren't women anymore. Men are tired of being told constantly they're at fault for every failing marriage. Who wants to deal with self-entitled brats who think men should capitulate to a woman's every demand.

hahahmm · Answer

Guys are rejecting feminism. Most women today have feminist ideas. Women decided they can decide their own value & that men’s opinions don’t matter. This collides with the man’s opinion. Just like if we walk into a store where a can of soda is priced at $20, we would walk out. These women are pricing themselves out of the market.

dragoblack · Answer

The ideals of the past were degrading of women. I personally would rather be back to back, working together with women and the ones i care about. In the past it was if you want a woman you just go for her... this caused rape, abuse, battery, and many other things. And the social standard of the 1950s towards women were incredibly toxic af saying if they didn't get married and have a family by a certain age they were a failure as a woman (granted this saying was the same to guys as well but they were called dirty hippies)

Snickermarstwix · Answer

We're not our grandfather. We're reaching a bit more a society filled up with respect for the other even though their is still a bunch of idiot here and there. I love to see a woman who feels way more free than ever.
Plus I don't see why we should value so much the world where our grandfather leaved. Don't try to make me think like they were that smart while women could barely vote in France while in the USA all women couldn't vote before our parents where born.
So fuck that I'm happy not living like they used to.

FlaviusStilicho · Answer

Many of us still do. I had a discussion with Grandma regarding why Grandpa was interested in her (he had died by this point), and his rationale that she described was basically the same as mine.

The real roadblock: finding old-fashioned women today. I think more men want them but have largely given up on finding these ladies.

The_White_Queen · Answer

I guess most men don't think they are getting much out of it and feel most women have little to offer. Also I think our grandfather were routed In tradition, like if a man wanted sex he had to get married and a woman would be a fool to have sex with a woman who is not her husband as sex without contraception leads to pregnancy. Like I would never have had sex unmarried without contraception.

Anonymous · Answer

I can't invest in a woman, dedicate my life to her as the mother of my children, provide, protect, cherish and respect her... if she's taken part in random hookup, has high body counts, or squandered her sexuality and youth on bad boys.

I opted out long ago.

bolverk · Answer

Guys are sick of being told that they are to blame for failing marriages, but not being able to fight effectively as they have to carry the full financial burden for those failures whether they are to blame for them irrespective if they are or are not.

soleil2666 · Answer

I'll tell you why - because the Chinese are having male children more than female - which then enrages western women, because they want to be protected from the Chinese by their men not be shared (the Mongol conquest memory).
And since men are largely oblivious - the media sells it as 'oh, women, go rage, get angry, break them' etc...

bamesjond0069 · Answer

There are men who are like the older generation. The problem is there are almost no women like the older generation. I can tell you for a fact my grandpa wouldn't go anywhere near a fat purple haired tattooed can't cook harpy and neither would I.

Women a generation or two or three ago mostly aspired to be virginal, church going, stay at home submissive wives and mothers who were not fat. When you are a traditional woman you will earn a traditional man.

jwsstein · Answer

Tina turner had it right when she wrote what's love got to do with it it second hand emotion

lightbulb27 · Answer

We had a need for her and children on our farm back then. Hands to help to survive and build family. Now, it's a lot of work, responsibility... burden... and women with power... can sting us bad. It's now a bigger risk.

Anonymous · Answer

Real simple women of today are NOT the women our grandfather's had. The entire social atructure has changed. There is NO reward at all to be that man anymore statistics bear that out. If a guy does it anymore he does it for his own personal code which IMHO he should. But women don't respect him they think he's a chump.

MEWHITEMANMEBAD · Answer

Modern women are women anymore. They are brainwashed, superficial, entitled little assholes brainwashed by social media and feminism plus I have my own life to worry about

Wheelindealin1 · Answer

I think the first question should be, "how did our grandfathers like/want their women?"
Times have definitely changed. One income may not be enough depending where you reside. Raising children now is definitely more challenging than back then. I wouldn't want woman to think she is a level lower than I am because of my gender.
Nowadays, the influencers like social media, music, radio, talk shows/tv play such a big part in society. And it's not always positive

MissDawn7961 · Answer

most of todays men do not treat women like the bible says to and our grandfathers did so we women will not put up with anything less then these type of men ! Thanks

awesjones · Answer

Whoever asked this is literally the most retarded person on this site. I'm 33 years old, I I want a woman like that, all my single friends want that my age, it's just that finding one is a bout as realistic as as finding $100 bill on your way to work. It may happen once or twice in your life but that's about it. The only people that for some reason decided that men don't like these kind of women are females themselves and pro football players. If you don't believe me watch the reactions to this

humanearth · Answer

Everything above, plus I mainly blame the internet. The internet killed the human spirit and fight.

There's a hotty with every key stroke now days. So they don't have to work it. Like I had to.

They got it too easy today.

Knightend · Answer

There are many men that want a 'classic woman'. They are just very hard to find in this day and age. Many women *think* they are classy classic women, but more often than not they aren't.

LoU_Hades · Answer

Most women don't want being liked. Ergo. No one likes them and many tries to find the reason for this behavior of others in their 'inadequate' appearance.

BCA6010 · Answer

Combination of hookup culture, toxic relationship behavior, and devalue of marriage as an institution, which has also impacted long term relationships.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't care what my grandfather liked, I'm my own man, with my own preferences in women, music, movies and all the other things, humanity has to progress, we don't have to follow the old-fashion things... otherwise, we'd still be watching black and white TVs.

MzAsh · Answer

Careful putting that generation on a pedestal. There’s not much I admire about any of my grandparents marriages.

Rangers · Answer

They feel that they aren't getting much out of it and know how ridiculous girls standards are and how few men they're willing to date, which is the reason why so many girls complain about being cheated on.

ForteExe · Answer

I think men do want that, but it's extremely less common now a days and guys realize that they'll likely never find that type of girl, so they chose to settle for something less instead of being alone forever.

grega239 · Answer

Speaking for myself.
Most women I met have cheated , have a high body count, want their cake and eat it too. Parties, drugs , too much alcohol.

Oh and if you bring up any of it, you're the bad guy for not accepting her for how she is...

FictionalCharacter · Answer

Technology and change of society. Everyone has more of different options and are testing the waters (mostly people).

DiscomfortZone · Answer

Our grandfathers didn't have to deal with self-victimizing feminazi attention whores. Women had more respect for their spouses and themselves back then.

SarahsSummer · Answer

I know that’s not true. Men still want women and that one main reason this site exists.

Silver158 · Answer

Also social media causing women to have over inflated egos while being lazy at the same time. Women having demands of guys who earn 6 figures have 6 pack abs etc while not bringing anything to the relationship themselves.

bannacookies · Answer

I think many do, but women have changed it seems and guys taste have changed since the 40's and so on.

coolhandroo · Answer

Because when feminist decided they wanted to be men you haven't been a group that intrigues us. It's womens faults for killing schivelry and splintering the typical American family

cheesyballs_ · Answer

I've encountered some men who want their women to work just like them and not be stay at home mothers, so the guys have changed as well as the women.

Kato99 · Answer

It's not that we don't want them. Those types of women don't exist anymore.

Noodle_fan · Answer

it is because of porn , technology turn people into lazy and spoiled well i believe it only happened on SOME men , not all of them lol

Philyouup · Answer

Not sure a pole is the right thing. How do you mean? Like why do men not like woman? Or want to go out with them? Not sure what it is your asking.

Piteka5 · Answer

I disagree, I'm all for the good old days. In fact, the dating scene of today makes no sense to me

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Apparently they do because thousands of people get married every single and go out on dates and have boyfriend and girlfriend.

genericname85 · Answer

Cause women are not anymore what they were in grandpa's times.

doctorwhofan23 · Answer

I think it’s because the things that are supposed to make dating easier do the opposite.

MAINEVENTMAFlA · Answer

Because back then girls weren't whores by the age of 15.

Why don't men want women anymore like our Grandfathers did?

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