Why don't women approach guys more often? (Page 2)
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They are afraid of rejection and think it comes off as desperate
They already have to sort through the ones that have approached them and are chasing them.
Good point!
However, that's kind of also the reason why men don't approach. Because we don't want to be just another "candidate" to sort through.
Well these guys gotta understand that if she’s vetted all of them and is still single, then she’s not interested in them.
@Assi2k Hmmm! Another good point!
I like debating with you. You teach me things haha.
@Jamie05rhs lol you’ve taught me a couple things as well
@Assi2k Aw, thank you! :)
@Jamie05rhs thank yyou hun!
I disagree. Women hold “candidates” to the side for just in case a lot of the time. Orbiters are a thing as well. And most important is the age old right of women to change their minds. 80% of failed marriages were because women changed their minds.
Because hordes of desperate fools who have zero chances approach us, we don't want to look desperate for a guy we have chosen.
How do you look desperate by approaching? That makes no sense
Because it gives off masculime engery and looks adesperate. Plus some people still believe in men doing the chasing.
Masculine*
Some fear rejection, some fear being labelled as a "slut"
Nah it’s because they’re afraid of getting raped😂
@KevnHanma speaking from experience?
why would someone getting loads of job offers apply for any other if they can easily pick the best one from that pile unless all those offers aren't worth it.
Because as much as females have fought for "equality" they still believe that when it comes to dating the guy should still do all the work and the female should basically just say yes or no.
Western societal bullshit and a lack of self confidence.
When you chase a guy it’s harder to say no when he wants to have sex. I used to chase and most guys just thought that meant I was easy. It’s great if you’re just looking to hook up, but not so great if you want a relationship
Excellent point. Easyness of it in the eye of the other person, will never leave any respect for you in their hearts. And what to build relationship on if there was no respect? Some rules can't change, society is not ready for them. Even if separately an individual person thinks they are ready. Maybe it can work for two of very very rare individuals, but on larger scale, it's rather not for majority and it's rather unsafe for a woman too.
It's inappropriate for women. Sorry, not classy at all.
Right? I’ve been told it’s bold but I have always felt it looked needy or pathetic.
@KEC203 And my experience also showed it's always fatal. Afterall our mothers and grandmothers always pass on it's only something prostitutes would do. I don't know why these men who disliked my comment think they can change 2 thousand + years of what is engraved in collective consciousness of both gender. Only to look "modern". Sorry that's just not the way it goes. by the way Anna Bey's yt channel also goes into psychology of this and how many relationships where woman approaches, fall apart after between 1-3 months, as there is no that crucial factor of mystique. Man feels bored and spoilingly, goes away. Even with a boring personality in girl, he stays if he takes charge of initiating things daily. Stupid psychology of theirs but if that brings happiness and contentment, then they shall consider if that spoiled attitude even benefits them at all.
Hold on I wanna ask… women have been “property” to men for hundreds of years… why change? Men run the world and women just live in it apparently… why change though right?
@VanillaSalt no connection with this issue
But the idea is the same. Just because something had been a certain way for a long time does not mean it does not need to change.
I’m curious. If every man in the work was nothing better then a 2 overall… would you date a 2 or say fuck it and spend your life alone? Does the answer change if all men are okay but there was nothing special about them? Now what if every man was a 10 and you wanted them all but all they wanted was to fuck around… did your answer change at all?
When I say 2 or 10 I mean overall. Finance, looks, personality.
@VanillaSalt In neither case I'd date any of them. Ages of naivity and "hope to change someone through my work" are gone in very young years of mine. Why to disrespect myself if I see misery in both kind of scenarios. None of them are even an option. Better be alone. They are 10? Well they are obviously not 10 of they are so horrible. How can personality be a 10 if he's a womanizer and a cheater? You have some very problematic and unclear, non - built up criteria. That's very shallow grading. That's like saying French fries and fried meat is appetizing food and are therefore, good for you. It can
look or smell certain way as much as it wants but I'm not a foodie - it's still extremely unhealthy. Especially if you go on with that kind of diet for long. Same thing mentally and emotionally. You'll die sooner. More stress. Unhappiness.
Women were for long more empathetic than men, would just accept their destiny so incredibly strongly and responsibly... Even been playing roles of devoted wives and mothers to complete douchbags, simply because they were in arranged marriages and wanted to please parents, their feelings, social roles reputation, name and honor and not to hurt honor of that horrible man they married who just chased other women around or was abusing them. They had to grow for both and would try to emphatize with whomever comes their way. Just last night I watched couple of sad historical dramas based on true history. Well... Things have changed. There are no arranged marriages in civilised parts of world anymore. Women have less nerves to put up with crap. But that doesn't mean that I have to come forth to look like a prostitute. I have, in contrast to historical record, freedom to look to defend only my honour and only my feelings. I don't own some 5 families and whole society some weird obeying.
From all what I understand, man has greater respect for a woman of honour. And honour is not running to any man just because he "looks like something". Also a man shall not be doing this unless he feels at least some kind of connection.
Question, though, why do you think person doesn't have life outside work? That's too narrow of a place. Nowadays most of us work from home anyway. You are quite brainwashed to believe money means that much too. You gave that a 10. And he just as well might be most horrible abuser, selfish, undercultured or what not. Scary thinking.
Once again I’m talking finance, looks, AND PERSONALITY. Also why do you say I think people don’t have s as life outside work? I never said anything like that. Also I don’t have a life outside as I work 6-6 6 days a week lmao.
@VanillaSalt you said: "Now what if every man was a 10 and you wanted them all but all they wanted was to fuck around"
How is that 10 with personality? This has no principles, no values, just little, immature boys that have no emotional responsibility nor are emotionally available. That's 0, not 10.
You said : "I’m curious. If every man in the work was nothing better then a 2 overall…"
In the work... I assume you meant in the workplace. Although English is not my native language, I assume it's supposed to be "at at the work", but again, many people skew grammar on purpose for some "vibe" or effect I don't know. Maybe you thought "all the men available to work with at all". But the answer is completely same.
They can be perfect in everything except not want to commit to you that’s what I meant by 10…
Sorry my bad it was a mistake. I meant in the world.
@VanillaSalt what's the point of wanting to engage oneself with someone who doesn't want to get engaged with you? Afterall, that means emotionally unavailable. That's a serious trauma trait and sign of unhealthy. Every human being wants to connect. Besides, that's nothing else but irresponsible behavior - Throwing yourself to crocodiles. No thank you.
They're afraid of looking like sluts and whores that chase dick!!
Because life taught me they find every other girl attractive but me.
Meanwhile life teaches me I cannot be loved and nobody cares if I die much less if I succeed. I hate this world and I hate the people in it and yet I’m not allowed to fell this way. Not only that but if I feel this way I’m immediately ugly in the eyes of women…
I’m not complaining but you should understand both sides suffer from the same shit and yet out you hear more from women about how unfair everything is. This bothers me. This bother many men causing them to dislike women, not see them as equal or worth marriage, not treat them with respect, and overall to just distance themselves from women.
Considering this IF your one of the women whom not only believe in equality but see this divide it SHOULD be your responsibility to step up and change the opinions of men… if you wanted to improve your situation. Because one of 3 things are going to happen…1 sides going to step up and try and connect men and women. Or else either women and men will settle for partners or they won’t in which case you and other women like you will die alone without children or families.
Where do you see yourself at 60 on your current path? Because if you don’t like it you only have a few decades to change it and that’s not something easy to do.
Because they get called sluts and whores when they do.
Hugs...
only by other girls that are jealous of her bravery... after 30 years of marriage 3 children and 8 grandchildren, Who cares what Bitter people said?
BE BRAVE, Seek Happiness, Be Bold
@Kvnhanma why are you so obsessed with me. Leave me alone
@Kvnhanma quit stalking me creep
@Kvnhanma leave me alone
@Kvnhanma you commented on my opinion and you won’t stop. Please go away, you are making people uncomfortable.
Many are afraid of rejection and being considered a slut in my opinion.
How does talking to someone make you a slut?
I get the rejection but I’m not understanding the slut part.
i dont get the "slut" part either. starting off all you are doing is trying to start up a friendship.
They would lose the power advantage... that would never happen. The self-esteem boost of rejecting dozens of men a week while being able to cry about being alone as well is something they will never give up
I don’t have to approach guys they usually approach me
Thats probably because you aren't Justin Bieber! ;)
I encourage girls to approach me and try to talk with me before deciding if I am their type or not.
because the world, nature, is meant to be cruel and an injustice
Because men are expected to do all of the work, forever, and always...