How can a guy in his 30s who’s never had a girlfriend and is a virgin improve his chances of getting a girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

- He has done self improvement in terms of working on confidence. He has many hobbies, many friends and many interests. - he has spent time improving his online dating profile and getting better photos.

- He’s been on 3 dates from women he’s met online/on apps but has been told by all of them after a few dates that they really enjoy his company but just want to be friends.
- He’s asked friends and people he’s met out and about on dates also but he gets told they just want to be friends.
- He doesn’t get many matches online. 1 a month at most.

[GlassTop]

It’s your personality bro. Has nothing to do with your looks. Either you are very awkward/nerdy/weird, or you are doing something that girls don’t find attractive. You can pick up a girl easy no problem if you wanted. I have a friend who isn’t ugly, and could get a girl easily, but he has a lot of issues. First, he has zero confidence. He’s always pointing out his own flaws about himself. Second, he talks wayyy too much. He isn’t funny, and sometimes just says weird/stupid stuff at the worst times. Third, he has no style. He wears the most bland clothes, don’t have any presence, and just comes off as desperate. Good guy, but he’s either gonna be a virgin for a long time or turn gay. There isn’t anything I can say to help him. I’ve seen 60yo fat dudes pick up girls just by offering weed and alcohol to college girls, getting their number and inviting them over. It’s just a you problem. Get off dating apps. Go find a fair or party where you can talk to people and build up your social skills, start asking out a bunch of girls. Get turned down a bunch and learn how to improve. Eventually you will get a girl. If that’s your goal. Also, talk to ugly fat girls too. Lower your standards. It’s good practice.

[exitseven]

Try to expand your social circle. Make new friends. If a girl just wants to be friends then go with that. Maybe you will meet some of her friends. You never know where you will meet that special someone.

[Asker]

He already has a large social circle.

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[SnakeBoop]

by not obsessing over the fact they're a virgin like its something that needs to be lost or devalues them. it doesn't. just get on with life

[Asker]

He doesn’t obsess over it. That makes no difference.

[Realworldanalysis]

Is he under 6'0"? Is he making decent money? Does he have good top tier looking face? These are things you haven't told us that women care about when deciding relationship/sex.

[Asker]

Yes, yes and no.

[Realworldanalysis]

Then there is your answer for why your friend is struggling. He'll need to show off his cash to convince women into relationship but be warned it won't actually be a relationship but more like a john/prostitute arrangement where each party lie to each other that they genuinely care about each other and are in love.

The modern woman cares about 3 things:
1. Looks (Height and/or face/race)
2. Money
3. Social status

Depending on the women and her age, the priority of these 3 things will change. Your friend has good social presence but he's under 6'0 and doesn't have good looking face to compensate for it; in some cases race is a factor like for many women consider being black to be negative to date someone. Thus, if he isn't splurging out his money to these girls to show his financial stability they aren't going to see him anything more than just friends.

My advice, have your friend express his money through his car, clothes and where he takes these girls for dates but again be warned he very likely might end up with a gold digger and someone who wants him for only financial stability. It's not shame, most men who aren't in top 20% end up in this relationship with women.

[boggboss]

Would depend on the guy and the reasons why he has found it hard so far

[Asker]

How can he find out the reasons?

[awkward_author]

Act confident, don't stress about your virginity status, and make sure you don't come across as desperate.

[TOQGYDL]

Shouldn't you be a wizard by now?

[Anonymous]

Another case that is a depressing reminder

[Asker]

Of what?

[Opinion Owner]

That cases like you are male-dominated it seems

[Asker]

As opposed to?

[Opinion Owner]

My guess is you are around 31 or 32, what I mean is, men it seems more likely than women are to end up perpetually single like this

[Asker]

I don’t think that’s necessarily true. There are plenty of women who are perpetually single and some are bitter too.

[Opinion Owner]

Just doesn't seem as possible for women as for men since women don't have to be the ones to hit on guys or pursue

[Citizenkirk]

Ask women out.

[Jamie05rhs]

Show us your photos.