Guys, how do you feel about women making the first move to get with you? Is that a turn off/on?

[Pinay_ako]

Ladies, would you make the first move if your eye candy is either too shy/clueless that you want him bad? What would you to let him know you want him? Or wait for him instead? Or just move on?

[TheSpaceGnome]

1. It's very helpful, as it saves time and headaches since many women are offended by men doing it (to the point of acting like a "victim" just because the guy thought she was pretty and wanted to know if she was interested).

2. It's very attractive, but only if we are attracted to you, and ultimately I won't be attracted unless I already know her well enough to know she is mentally compatible, so it's more like it's a good starting point, it's something a woman can do to get her foot in the door long enough to see if they are a match (which to even get that far requires looking like what he likes physically).

So it depends, but either way, it's not a risk to do it.

Unlike a lot of women, a guy is not likely to call security and claim harrasment just because you started verbally flirting with him, speaking in a lewd manner, or showing off your looks, instead those things are part of the "getting your foot in the door" process. Just don't touch without us giving the ok, and you'll be fine.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Not a fan of it. I would prefer she just gives me the signs she's interested and I make the move towards her first.

[Pinay_ako]

My man! I love the answer. So suave and smooth

[Ms_Facesitter]

I've made the first move before. It's so much faster than waiting. Sounds obvious, but it is, I don't understand why so many just wait for him to come to us.

What if he likes you but thinks you're intimidating (I saw a question on that today) so he doesn't come to you
What if he's shy and you're with your group of friends? He'll have to face me AND my friends.
What if he never saw you romantically, but never gave signals that he couldn't?
What if you have competition and someone else likes him? Will you wait and run the risk of her running off with your potential guy? I sure won't.
What if he likes you, he obviously does. He's given you all the signs. What are you waiting for?

There are just too many reasons for me. Not making the first move when you like someone never made sense to me.

[Pinay_ako]

When I like someone, I make it known. The worse answer is no. Then I move on. I can’t say later, I didn’t try.

[Bricealan]

👍👍👍👍👍👍😂😂😂❤

[limsasi]

I asked the guy out first on an official first date, it went well we had a blast. No one should ever be scare to initiate.

[Pinay_ako]

That’s my girl!

[BarryLiverstone]

You go girl. Are you all still dating?

[Bambalicious]

I seduced my husband 😂. We worked at the same place and were best friends (for 5 months) but not romantically involved. There was a blizzard and he cleaned my car off for me. I had no heater (no money to fix) so he was worried about me. He insisted on following me home so he knew I made it okay. He lived across from work (with roommates) and I lived 30 minutes away. I had been wanting a romantic relationship with him and with his offer I thought of the perfect game plan. After we arrived at my home i invited him inside (he was going to take off). I told him he must be hungry and I offered to make him dinner. He said, “yeah, I am hungry”. I cooked a meal that took a little extra time. Once we were done I told him it was really late so he should just stay here for the night. I then told him that his car was better in the snow and he could drive me to work. I told him that he could sleep in my bed and watch Robot Chicken. We spent the night hanging out and watching tv. We started dating and he basically moved right in with me because we always wanted to be together. We got married a month into the relationship. Been over 12 years now. He still thinks it’s funny what I did and he had never had a girl flip the situation on him before. He loved it.

[glennos89]

Definitely a big fat turn ON for me!!!

Because then I know that's she is really liking me and not just selecting me out of her god knows how many men's applications.

Ofcourse this doesn't mean automatically that the feelings will be mutual from my side but I would definitely make sure she doesn't feel scared to do it again when she's meeting someone else because I feel that it's difficult to tell from a guys perspective if a girl is really into you when you approach her, or that she is just selecting you from her multiple choices being the best out of the worst.

I want a girl who is really attracted to me as a person instead of being 1 of her X-amount of choices selected from her inventory of messages

Hopefully it makes sense what I'm trying to explain. I'm not really finding the correct words in English to explain my feelings because English isn't my native language 🙈

[Pinay_ako]

You’re doing well!

[glennos89]

Thanks 🥰

[AMS700CX4u2]

Once again times have changed. When I met my wife of 50 years this month, girls with traditional values would not initiate contact with a phone call. My mother, being less traditional, told me the copper ran both ways.(copper wires ). So are you sticking to the more traditional practices of courtship or not. Some do, some don't. I think the vague way of the traditional practices are based on the attitudes of sex. That obsurd practice of attaching shame to one of the most exciting and necessary occurances in a humans life.

[Wsx2wsx2ws]

No I would not mind. I have tried to get close to a few women but perhaps they are so shy they flutter away. I can't tell what the deal is. It would be refreshing for someone to just say, I would like to spend time with you and learn who you really are.

I had some one say they like me best at a certain place I go. SO I asked would they like to do things together, I was thinking of visiting this area and wouldn't mind company. I got a swift no. I don't really know the deal with this woman so I am walled back up and my gates are barred again.
Be nice all that confusion be gone.

[Finchie40]

It’s a turn on , considering most people are shy and we don’t know what someone else is thinking , so it’s better to take the chance instead of never knowing , Some body languages and eye contacts can break the ice as well , so it just depends , It’s funny because most men can’t really pick up if a girl is really interested in him or not just like most girl’s can’t pick up if a man is interested in her or not , why it’s best to tag along with an apposite sex friend when going out because they can usually tell you if someone is interested in you or not lol

[RavVid]

I have to laugh at this because I have seen polls where girls say they initiated first.
And I have to say girls have this nice way of making it positively ungentlemanly for you not to invite them out and imply 'if you ask me I'll say yes'. It goes something like this...

GIRL: "Oh I really want to see < latest block buster boy movie> but none of my girlfriends do". So she's told you she doesn't have a boyfriend but needs a man to see boy movies with and doesn't want to go alone and it is all to you if her hearts desire is to be fulfilled.
Guy: "Would you like to see it with me"

Of course before then it would have been...
Guy: she's hot. I like her tits
Girl: He's ok and he's staring at my breasts. I've got something to work with here

Only a few girls have ever asked me out. To be honest my reaction was does this mean I have been put in the friend zone. Can I/Should I be romantic. I'm confused.

[Bricealan]

I like it. When I moved to CA. I worked at McGaw Laboratories in Irvine, CA. One night after work, in my apt. the girls in my office called and asked me to meet them at Lakeside Restaurant in Irvine. I went, and we stayed late, and out in the parking lot, one of the girls put her hand in my pants very boldly. I was embarrassed under the circumstances with the other girls there, but it WAS very exciting to have her do that.

[Pinay_ako]

Yo really? Wow she brave

[Bricealan]

P. S. she had been drinking a lot, AND did get arrested on her way home, for DUI. I SHOULD have taken her home.

[dustybiker]

I always approached. Never saw the point of waiting around or playing games.

[Pinay_ako]

These girls are making me tear up 🥲

[ChooChooHaha]

If I know something'd happen, of course. If he intimidates me, I'd sidle up to him. If I'm feeling brave enough at one point or the other, I'll be more obvious. Sidling= crack a few jokes, be around him but not too available. Brave enough time = suggestive jokes, touching him more, letting him do more flirtatious things.

[NathanDavis]

well... given than 80% of the time, it has been girls who approach me first and it was been really great afterwards, I do feel positive about women making the first move when they really are interested or intrigued, lol

besides that, I have never seen anything wrong at all about it... if you're intrigued or interested by someone, whether you're a man or a woman, you can just approach someone without second thoughts about that being seem wrong or whatever

we are people, we're social by nature... and all those archaic "rules" never made much sense to me, they just get on the way lol

[PJH359]

Major turn on…For someone like myself, a total introvert who gets tongue tied around a beautiful woman, it is totally necessary. If it weren’t for women approaching me and/or making the first moves, I would have had a very dull dating history. And besides…it’s 2022. Old rules have been thrown out the window.

[alderoth]

Man, I completely prefer it!! I am extremely shy, I am terrible in social situations, I have TERRIBLE confidence issues, I hate my body, I hate my physical appearance, I see every ex of mine as dodging a bullet by leaving. I feel I am only worth a good romp every few days that I pay for. So if a woman just happens to be interested in me, I would greatly appreciate it if they would approach me and tell me how they feel, or think about me. It would take so much stress off of me. Take care!!

[OpenClose]

It a good thing needs to happen way more. I always respect a woman more for trying to make a move, and generally give her a decent amount of slack.

If you have heard the opposite, it is either from controlling men, or especially women who like receiving attention but don't want to be expected to give it.

[Wavvygurl]

I posted a very similar question recently, and I ended up making a move. Please do it! Men love it.

[malwins]

What did he say

[Wavvygurl]

@malwins, I was blunt and said I would be interested in hooking up with him. He said that sounds fun, and he is also interested. But at the same time, that’s all that I’m interested in now, so the situation works out for me.

[Pinay_ako]

Hell he no problem with that

[Pinay_ako]

Hell yea

[wingattebaby16]

I have had to many times. Or i would not have gotten any sex!

Some guys are so shy, they can barely even ask you out on a date.

[Pinay_ako]

Get on it!

[MrCon10t]

This is another weird one for me. I would absolutely love it if someone made the first move on me. The issue is that I’m finding out that people have in the past. They never directly stated anything though, As all they ever gave me were hints. And I had no idea what those hints were at the time, so I totally missed them. I really wish a woman would just walk up and say “hey, would you like to go out with me sometime?” That’d be alright with me!

[20yearsolder]

It's definitely a turn on, it's nice to know that we are wanted. I encourage women to go after what they want. Don't sit on your ass and wish something would happen, make it happen

[Pinay_ako]

Oh I don’t sit around. If I want or like a man, I won’t be twiddling my fingers waiting for him to text me first. The worst is No or he doesn’t text back and I move on

[Xoxocutekitty]

It's only cool or if she is attractive/attractive enough. If she is too ugly or fat, he will laugh at/about her with his buddies.

[Pinay_ako]

This is true too

[PatriceONeal]

We learned it from you ladies

[PatriceONeal]

No if someone shows interest in you.. that's typically a turn on. Women choose not to approach men becuase they simply don't have to.

Men are already programmed by society to literally do everything and make all the sacrifices. This is why most matured men are done.

[WhitneySnow]

I prefer when the guy asks me out but I’d make the first move if I had to

[Adogdog]

Nice!

[Pinay_ako]

I’m so proud of you 👏

[Adogdog]

Of me? LOL 🤣

[WhitneySnow]

Thanks 😊

[Pinay_ako]

Of you 😘