What's your opinion on online dating? How often do you respond to the interests shown to you if you are on such a site?

[dipalisaha]

[MrOracle]

Nearly everyone is trying to shop outside their price range, so online dating is mostly toxic and a waste of time. The only people who do well are the top 5-10% of men, who can bang all the women without having to commit to any of them.

The lower 80% of men and lower 40% of women are completely ignored, and real relationships are the rare exception, not at all the norm. The top 60% of women get lots of attention, but it's nearly all exclusively sexual attention, and the more attractive the guy is, the more that is true.

That's because dating apps are designed to give you the illusion of abundant choices, but the abysmally low success rate proves that is a lie.

Yes, sitting at home on your couch in your PJs swiping on tons of options is easier than getting dressed and going outside, but the outcomes of online dating are so poor that if the same success rate was applied to almost anything else, you would immediately call it a scam. Well, it IS a scam.

Date LOCALLY and meet people IN PERSON, which takes more work and effort but has far better outcomes.

[Bob92220]

I signed up for a 3 month paid subscription for PlentyOfFish and Match. com.

I emailed about 20 women who lived near me and that I thought would be a good match. No one responded back. About 1/4 of the women viewed my profile. So I extended my search and wrote to about 20 more women. No one responded back. I wrote to another 20 women, but I wasn't necessarily interested in them, mainly because they live too far from me. 4 women responded to me and what they told me were all about the same.

They get tons of emails everyday from men who want to meet them. One woman said she skipped a few days and when she went back to the site she had over 100 emails from men. On a lazy day they will click "select all emails" and delete them all without reading them.

The men they meet offline are losers so they are trying their luck online. However, they believe the men on the dating sites are losers too.

I did ask them out for lunch but they all declined. They said they get asked out for lunch all the time. They just aren't interested.

I don't know how these women are going to get into a relationship. Especially if they think men are losers. If they do meet a man, she will think he is a loser, even if he isn't.

I have a very low opinion of online dating sites. Mainly because the women have too many choices so that they won't be able to choose anyone. All the attention they get boost their egos. Maybe the sites work for handsome men who have all the 6's: 6 pack abs, 6 figure income, at least 6 ft tall, etc.

[KBird]

I personally like it.

It depends on what you're using it for. If you're looking for a hookup, its easier. But if you're looking for someone to potentially date, or make friends with, its harder.

For dating, or even casually dating, its often a hit or miss (and is most of the time a miss). Its like finding a needle in a haystack. I personally like online dating, because most things are laid out on the table, like if they are interested in dating you, or whether theyre just interested in a hookup. Finding someone to date in person is nearly impossible, because most of the time Im clueless as to what their interests are, and sometimes feel disappointed or like its a waste of time.

It also depends on the app or platform you are using. Like Bumble is more often used for dating rather than Tinder, although I did find my current partner on Tinder. I have social anxiety, so online dating is a great way for me to meet new people. They may also be a bit quirky or socially awkward, but thats part of their charm.

Meting someone online, at a coffee shop, an event, or even at a bar are all equivalent. I think its ridiculous when people judge online dating, it doesn't matter as long as you're happy in the end.

[Amy10223]

I know there are many scammers out there preying on women, and we have to be careful who we meet online. There are many horror stories I've read about them, including the one I am on myself. That said, I also heard good stories of people meeting their significant others on the sites, or just finding some good friends to share some fun with. I have waited long but I finally foind someone who seems very nice and is funny, etc. I have not met yet in person, we've only texted and it willbe this week I finally meet him, or in another two weeks when I am back from vacation. I'm nervous as I have not dated in a long time. But still looking forward to meeting him. Oh, and I have checked him out, and he is "safe".

[jennifer_bloom]

I find with online dating, getting a first response Is not hard but keeping it is hard. Like I had a lot of guys message me on this site, but most of the time the friendship was over within 6 days.

[coachTanthony]

Just get on Bumble and try it out. Make sure your photos are Bomb and your bio is specific into what you are looking for. Then judge for yourself. Men will probably tell you it sucks because they suck at it.

[ethanallen]

coachTanthony works for Bumble full-time.

[coachTanthony]

@ethanallen It's a good app. I might consider it.

[Bob92220]

When I google, "Bumble Reviews" it's mostly bad. These are some of the headlines from TrustPilot:
Run away from this kindom of fakes or just don't go near it
CUSTOMER SERVICE HAVE BEEN SO UNHELPFUL. I FEEL TOTALLY CONNED. USE IT FOR FREE ONLY.
BAD UX/UI, FEMINIST APP AND BUGS
Horrible experience with this app
Beware!!!
This bumble app is rammed full of fake profiles!

[coachTanthony]

@Bob92220 I have had a couple of clients not like the app for whatever reason but most of all it's better then most of them out there. Online Dating will always be a shit show but you can do well with a little bit a knowledge.

[ethanallen]

There have been numerous studies that show women , regardless of their social market value, will always pursue men on the internet dating site with the highest social market value. Men with moderate or low social market value would be happy to pursue and date a woman of equal social market value ; however, all of the women that a man will pursue are looking to men in the top 5% of SMV. This is why internet date is terribly for men. It is great for women and great for men in top 5% of SMV.

[ethanallen]

How does Bumble pay you? Are you compensate by the number of positive blog posts? or positive fake reviews?

[coachTanthony]

@ethanallen "with the highest social market value." Okay so what's the problem? Can you blame them? Should they settle for the average guy? Men these days just simply stopped competing and started complaining and that is sad.

[coachTanthony]

@ethanallen Bumble doesn't pay me. lol

[Bob92220]

I agree with you - you can't blame the women. If a woman of average looks and circumstances wants to date a grade A man, then more power to her!
However, Jim Rohn says, "If you really want something you will find a way. Otherwise you will find an excuse."
The average looking woman will only talk with grade A men but these men have so many options. Why would he settle for her? He may have fun with her but that's it.
So these women start to complain about men. If the average looking female really wanted a relationship she would get in one. Otherwise she just complains.

[Pinay_ako]

Never really thought of trying it

[CalmMind]

I've given up on it entirely. Not for lack of traffic, I just can't keep getting whiplash when the person I talk to isn't the person I meet on a date. It's either discussing marriage prospects on the first date, their mental health, ripping on their recent ex, or discussing my income (granted this was only 2 dates but holy shit they exploded when I excused myself and left). There's just a general lack of social skills, gracefulness, and kindness on dating apps. It's a meat market. That's it.

[ethanallen]

Online dating works well for two groups of people. The first group that has great success on internet dating is any woman who has a vagina. The second group that does well is any guy that is rated in the top 5% of looks among all men in his age group. For normal guys (ie average guys), you will be wasting your time on internet dating sites. Normal guys like me do far better meeting women in person. I do look at internet dating sites (as a non member) to see who is looking. I have actually met woman by walking up and introducing myself, telling them I saw them on Match and asking for their number.. This really works. Women in public place a higher importance on communication style and confidence than on looks. Women in internet dating sites place higher importance on looks.

[Anonymous]

Online dating is OK so long as you take it all with a grain of salt (and a shot of penicillin with the women you meet on there 🤣). I'd say only about 20% of the women on there are really looking. And only 10% of those will be interested in you. Then only a fraction of those will actually have the gumption to respond. So as a guy you have to send out 100 responses to hopefully get 1 reply.

I don't play offense anymore. If a woman messages me I might respond. But otherwise I'm just killing time. And getting a couple chuckles from some of the profiles I read. If something comes of it being on there, cool. But I really don't get emotionally invested in it anymore really.

[IAteTwoFullHams]

I love online dating, but online dating apps created by Match Group don't work. They're actually *designed* not to work, and to make people unhappy.

If an app tells you to swipe right on attractive people and swipe left if you pass, that app is a waste of your time and it will leave you sad.

OkCupid was kind of an amazing place to meet people before Match Group bought it.

[Guardian45]

Agreed. OKCupid used to be good. I met one girlfriend on there.

[DenizLikesTennis]

Online dating is a good opportunity for those who can't meet potential partners in real life because of circumstances like working too much. But also for those who have different standards/criteria and live in a bad neighborhood, so they can't find good pals and women.

I find online dating good if it is legit (not fake), highly active and has quality candidates.

[Fireguy17]

I live in a small town so my choices were very limited, so I used E Harmony with very good results.

The one thing about the sites where you have to pay to join is that most people on them are looking for a relationship, not a hook up.

they tend to be more serious about why they are there.

[Anonymous]

I think meeting someone “offline “ is the new awkward instead! People offline just walk straight and high as if they know everything in this world how stars function and universe spins. God forbid if nowadays we say a hi to each other
That hi has to be send online ~ with a smile if possible 😄

[Deepinthought345]

Well online dating works if you know the limits and keep your expectations open. There are some advantages for some people and doesn't work for a lot of people. But these days it is an option. I always respond if people get in touch. Maybe because I don't get so much attention otherwise.

[jhl_x]

It's like putting my self-esteem on a grinder. Made me feel even more undesirable than IRL, and people wouldn't even bother responding me. 0/10 wouldn't recommend it to anyone who's not at least average in looks.

[ohsheeT]

Well if I was on such a site I would probably check it out everyday but since I'm not I don't I never been on a dating site yet I started probably to fill out six profiles but have never ever completed one that's just not me I don't think I mean I like meeting new people but just not for me

[slatyb]

It worked very well for me and my wife. I politely responded to every woman who asked, because there weren't all that many. I understand that many women receive far too many messages to respond to them all, and there's no obligation for you to do that.

[DannyUk2017]

I respond a lot, until i find a common, if no interest shown, then i back off... so i don't put the person in a bad mood... but depends of the other "end" if its willing to keep in texting or not!

[sheikalana]

I met my husband on a dating app. I still think dating apps are trash as a lot of people are only there for casual sex or hook ups instead of something serious. It took me a long time to find my husband tho.

[mstbooblover]

In my opinion online dating sites are just bullshit. 99% fake profiles as far as I can judge. The main reason for the existence of those sites is the same as with the lottery: making money.

[FilmGuy93]

I'm generally not a fan, but I met my present love interest online. Reddit, of all places, but that's technically online. I've only had disappointments through dating apps.

[Guardian45]

Mostly that's true. Plenty of Fish was HUGE waste of time!

[FilmGuy93]

@Guardian45 yup... a lot of people wasting each other's time, trying to market their onlyfans; other fuckery along those lines.

[Guardian45]

HAHAHA!!! 'Other fuckery'! 😆😂🤣🤪👍

[zagor]

Have not had success with it. The last time I used it was over a year ago. I've had probably just over a dozen first dates from online sites and have never had a second date from all of those. And I think it was mutual in most of the cases that one was enough. I think I'm probably done.

[monkeynutts]

I would advise people to not use dating apps, the problem is the fact that none of these providers are safe, god knows what they might use your metadata for, and you can use a VPN while active on the apps. Most people don't read the fine print, plus they are discusting particularly for women, it's genuinely just boring for men, doesn't matter Bumble, tinder, what ever else they all suck, and can't be trusted.