So I’ve liked this girl for months and I make it very obvious with signs and her dad said she really likes me too. But yesterday I asked her if she wanted to go to the movies over the weekend and see a movie. I set a place, time and location and said what movie and she said yes. She said she’s got something for work the day I told her but she asked to reschedule for the next weekend and that works. P. S. this is my first real dating experience lol so if I sound dumb right now that’s why
Should I go in with a “this is a date” mindset?
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I think you should specifically ask her on a date. Of course you can just see how this moving outing goes but I think it’s good to let your intentions be known. She could think this is something as friends for all you know since your neighbors and have become cool.
My bad I don't know why I put neighbors lol but have become cool
I’ll probably go the route of seeing how it goes considering we literally have never hung out just the 2 of us because it’s always been a group hangout or something. But my girl bsf said to say “this was a good date night “ and see how she responds. I wish we were neighbors tho that’d be cool lol we’d talk everyday 😂 I would let my intentions be known now but I feel the whole vibe would be thrown off you know. I think the part where she immediately tried to reschedule it shows she’s interested in going. Being interested in dating I think possibly but I’m just going to dress casually nice if that makes sense lol and see how she dresses and pay for her and all that stuff I do. But thank you
The only thing that worries me is if she’s like her dad where he flakes on most hangouts that he says we’re doing. I hate being led on to think something and the other person doesn’t respond to the important information like what’s going on. She seems respectful and like if she wants to do something she’ll make time so I’ll try to keep a level head lol my anticipation anxiety is a little high but I’m a little calm
Not even lying, I’ve actually had a guy do the whole “this was a good date” and I literally spiraled lol mainly because he’d never even told me he liked me before, now it’s a date? I thought he was just wanting to hang out since our friends couldn’t. So I don’t wanna say that’s gonna be her response, clearly not all women have this experience since your female friend suggested it. I mainly suggest this because you should let it be known from the start what you want. That’s way you’re not worried about being led on or whatever, like that shouldn’t take place when you’re both on the same page.
Also I get not wanting things to be weird, but now you’ve got outside parties involved like her dad and your friend. To me that’s what makes it awkward, having additional voices around conversations meant for two people. It sounds like your anxiety and fear of what’s to come is over complicating simple things.
Ok I’ll think about telling her now. So how do you suggest I say it. Because I feel like depending on how I say it could come across like woah you know lol. Again might sound stupid but my last dating experience wasn’t good and we never “asked each other out “ it kind of just happened and then we said what are we and boom lol but that whole thing I regret. Like I’ve told her dad which me and him are pretty close friends and he said she likes me too and I’ve already made it super obvious just because I ask her to hangout sometimes but I know she works a ton with 2 jobs and she babysits on days off
You know what f it what’s a good line to say like is “hey I like you” too basic?
Random question but do you think your friendship with her dad could be disruptive in any way? Like on one hand it’s nice that you’re cool with her dad already but I fear he’d have his hand in that situation more than he probably should. Also, do you think she has time for a boyfriend and her dad is disregarding that? Like he really wants her to date, start a family or whatever at her age and not just work? I ask because you say she rescheduled the one date, which is fine shit happens, but then you mention she’s busy with 2 jobs and babysitting. Sometimes parents (especially old fashioned) think they’re acting in our best interest by setting us up when it’s just not the time. I’m really just looking at the situation from all angles I guess lol but to be direct about your question, just ask her out. “Would you wanna go on a date sometime?” Suggest dinner or drinks, I don't know what your
Sorry didn’t mean to hit send and cut myself off lol I don’t know what you two normally do in group settings but even what you already have planned would be good to confirm a date on.
That’s a reasonable question like I get what you’re saying. Like just recently the dad got fired but not for something like “omg what were you thinking “ he was basically saying the 1st shift didn’t leave 2nd shift in a good spot and everyone has an issue with that. That part didn’t really serve a purpose for you lol but just wanted to say that so he doesn’t seem like fired for his fault yk. But I could see that with the dad. I was mainly scared that me asking would cut off and ruin the already established friend group at work but with him being gone from work it can’t ruin it. And I can say that. I just am tired of waiting to ask when i feel I’m a decently good looking guy and I have good morals and values compared to other guys I know.
In a group setting we are either at the dads house and watching a sports game having a beer or tequila and talking. After a few shots I get a little bit more comfortable and do what I want to do aka talking to her a lot more like last time it seemed like we were going places we were isolated for part of the time and just talking.
The fact he’s leaving is a good step! At least he won’t be so much in the mix. To be honest I’d leave him out as much as I could going forward, it just sets the tone that you’re trying to have a one on one relationship, nothing influenced or monitored by him. As for her busy schedule, do you think that would conflict? Don’t get me wrong, people make time for what they wanna make time for and plenty of people have whole families while working crazy hours. Everyone is different though.
Ok so a little update. Me and my best friend were talking over what to say to the girl I was going to hangout with. We decided to tell her I want to go to a restaurant with her and I clarified that I want it to be a date. The girl said "I think we're better off as friends". This was a few days ago, at first I was pretty sad over it but thank goodness for my friend like she checked on me and made sure I was ok and listened to me. Now I am over it but I am glad I asked and got an answer.
Oh man, on one hand sorry that didn’t work out but I’m really glad you were clear and got that answer so now you can be done. It would’ve sucked to do that initial hangout with you thinking it’s a date and her wanting friendship, you know? This is for the better! Glad your friend was checking on you as well, that’s very solid. What’s going to happen with this girls dad? Will you still be cool? Hopefully so!
I think we’ll be cool. I haven’t told anyone than my friend who isn’t associated with anyone in that friend group and the dad knew already that I liked her but he knew how nervous I was to tell her lol so he’d be more shocked and proud if anything lol but omg yes like I was going to dress nicer and do all the date stuff and if she came in like pajamas or something I’d be like bruh lol like heartbreaking.
Just wait and see if she goes out with you.