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I'm 29 now, and I graduated from college in 2014. I can relate to you!
Before I went to college, I used to watch a lot of college shows, and my parents used to tell me that college was a place where you'd meet lifelong friends and the perfect girlfriend. So, I was pretty excited for college.
When I started college, I went to a community college for 2 years. I made friends in my classes... but the friendships ended after the semester ended. After community college, I went to a university.
When I got to university, I stayed in the dorm and I had a tough time making friends. It seems like people were already friends with each other, because a lot of people didn't transfer and met each other during their freshmen year of college.
When I was in university, I tried talking to people in my classes, but they kind of shrugged me off and didn't seem to want to get to know me. I tried taking extra-curricular classes like film club, a lifting club and a TV club... but it was basically the same deal. People didn't really want to seem to get to know me.
In my dorm, I met some "friends", but they weren't the right crowd. They were people who drank daily, smoked weed and went to the bars every night. Needless to say, they are people who didn't end up graduating from college and my friendship with those people were very short lived.
In university, I actually ended up making a couple of friends. After college, I tried to keep those friendships going, but it was always me trying to reach out and make the effort. Once I stopped making the effort, I never heard from those people again.
No, most people will make friends in college, even a really shy person like myself. Therefore, if normal what is the status quo or expected, then no it's not normal.
Relationships don't just fall out of the sky, they require effort, especially if you're not as socially inclined.
I sympathize with the whole dull people thing, at my university there's a lot of people who just smoke and bum around or do nothing but get fucked up at parties, go join some clubs or pursue hobbies, you'll find your people if you put in the effort.
Sure it's normal. It's hard to find people to connect with, and that what makes it abnormal. But it's not your fault. You do you. As not traditional adults it's not easy making friends with people who are not your age. I wouldn't want to be around that either.
If it's a commuter campus it's more likely 😅 but it's always good to have a friend or 2 (: & so it just depends on how open you are normal for some, not normal for more extroverted people
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I don't think it's super common, but I felt the exact same way about my college experience! All I did was interact with a bunch of super wishy-washy people and incur lots of debt. The only people I met worth holding onto were people I met in 2 political science classes, I don't have a single person from my social circle.
I can safely say that there wasn't anyone I met that felt like the makings of lifelong friends. I have met more interesting people after college than I did in it.
not really normal, but I agree with you! well done...
There were a lot of people in my first classes... by the end, it was a handful. the party, "Im so smart", gotta have a girlfriend guys... they were all gone... that's how college should be, weed out deadbeats.
Its normal. I had classmates that only wanted to use me to help them study. I stopped engaging with them after a few weeks. They never wanted to hang out outside of class. They only wanted free-assistance. So I called them out on it and left them in the dust. Still passed that class with an A-. Doubt they had better lol
I did 2 years of college and made no close friends. One half-Italian boy would call me on Skype now and then before the friendship deteriorated as I dropped out of that class.
I plan on returning to college next year where I do hope to finally be one of the popular ones if I can improve my charisma and confidence between now and then 🙏🏻👨🏻🎓
Sure, it can be quite normal. As you say a lot of college students don't have a life, they just sit around smoking weed, drinking, surfing the net, watching TV or having sex
Is it “normal”? I’d say no, most people make friends in college.
Is there anything wrong with it? No. You’re there to get an education. Socializing may have its benefits, but it may also present distractions.
you'll be fine... remember that smarterpeople r more reclusive, and if that stuff doesn't interest you... it just doesn't.
Part of the experience is networking and developing social skills. Education and grades first, but engaging with other people is important too. Sounds like the college was lame if all they did was smoke weed or weren't cool to hang out with.
I had no friends left after uni too, similar reasons. I just went to uni later then everyone and not really enjoy all that noisy paries and being sick in the morning.
I had some from my hobbies, but soon after they scattered all over the world, so I'm on my own again and single too...
Did you have friends in high school?
Short answer, no, Humans are Social animals but introversion is also a thing
It is completely possible to be in a place where you make no friends for years (I didn't in Brussels), and you make them quite easily elsewhere.
No and actually kinda odd but let me ask you about your age? Did you start college later in life like your 30's? That might have something to do with it.
Yes, college is for learning and educating yourself, having friends is just like an extra curricular activity that is nice to have but not so much nessary.
What's this mystical thing called "college" i heard only the rich and elites can go there and those who are not and try live a life a debt and have the "over qualified" stamped to their every resume making them unable to get a decent job
There are two types of friends you make in college: There are the ones you study with, and then there are the ones who keep you from studying. Be selective in who you spend your time with.
when I transfered I lost contact with all my friends from one college, I dont keep in touch with others either from my other college either. Maybe one which kinda sucks. But its ok
It's normal to have standards. Why waste your time with people you don't like.
No not really 6 years of schooling o. my made one person I still talk to once a blue moon or so
What is "being normal"? How do you define what's normal and what's not?
Yes it would be, in my college i am not the type of the cool girls and I can't understand a single thing that the other girls said, sometimes I feel lonely but also peace, it is what I like, you don't have to be socialised.
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