I believe the only locks in the entire house should be on the outside doors, on the master bedroom, and all bathrooms. Every other door should only be what they call “passage doors” (door knobs without lock). on the bedrooms doors, they should be allowed to close their doors as they see fit. whether the door is open or close, if you're standing next to the doorway, you knock before entering. If, for some reason, the person would like the ability to lock their doors, let them ask for their doorknob to change and listen for the reason why. Not only does this allow for the right to privacy, it also sets the trust between parents and kids about the right to privacy. Trust me, when the kids are talking and chatting with someone, the mere fact that “the door doesn't lock” is enough to put fear that someone's gonna walk in on them for them not to try something. Even if they know someone will knock before opening the door, if they say “don't come in now I'm changing.” the mere guilt that they're not is enough of a guilt for them to realize they put their trust in their privacy in danger. Quite honestly, how many parents have called their kids out of their room and had the feeling you interrupted them from doing something by the mere way the kids were acting? I say there's no reason to punish or confront the kids. They are already feeling enough self blame for jeopardizing your trust in them about their privacy, there is no need (yet) to make them feel worst. The point has been made
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We had doors but no locks, not allowed... but I had friends who didn't even get doors. My older brother lost his door for doing something (I have no idea what) and whatever it was he must of kept doing it cause his room eventually got moved into a living area in the basement so anyone going down there could walk right in on him.
This was all pre-cell phone days too. I suspect he sneaked his girlfriend in at night, like you said happened in your area.
My parents basically had a rule of no sex or making out in the house, respect them... they also knew that they couldn't control or stop it else ware. Go to her house or the forest or mountains but NOT here... respect the house.
As such I did not allow locked doors in my house... lets just say that early on I did until my daughter locked herself in her room and wouldn't let me in for 10 minutes or so, until I broke it down and then she got to have the broken door forever. She was just mad at me cause I wouldn't let her go hang out with friends.
She is lucky to still have kept a door.
I never needed to close my door growing up. Mostly because I didn’t have anything to hide from my parents about. I want to raise up my kids to know that they can come to me about anything and everything. I still stand by the rule of no cellphones in their rooms until they’re 16. They need a phone for emergencies? No problem, I’ll bring out the Nokia. If they want to close the door, sure go for it, but my house my rules so they better understand I don’t plan on knocking.
I think closed doors are necessary at 12 when they start to become pre teens and are growing. It’s a form of privacy. I think it’s invasion of privacy if they can’t even close the doors to get changed. You can monitor your kids in more clever ways than not letting them have privacy.
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I would wait until they are 18 until they can have there door closed for as long they want but :
boys: 4-6mins changing clothes.
girls: 4-6mins (before puberty) and 8-10mins (during/after puberty , when she wants to start using make up) .
Masturbation 30mins (no phones, no cameras, nor webcam allowed )I would literally be brutally honest with my kids. I'd let them close their door.
Don't send nudes. Your gonna fuck your life up later and it's illegal. Pictures live forever and school will talk. And you will be bullied by girls and boys
Don't get no broad pregnant or don't get prego it's gonna fuck your life up. Kids are terrible aka you (child)
Stop masturbating all day. Once a week is good enough for you.
Stop being edgy and emo doing stuff for attention or affection.
Stop watching all that porn. I watch it too but it rots your brain. If you have to hide it chances are it's not good for you.
Don't be a whore
Don't so drugs. People that do drugs are
losers trying to escape their life or. Trying to fit in.
Don't embarrass me or make me disppaoanited in you. My love is conditionalwhen i was 16 i had a good friend and a cool parent explain something to me I said how come your son is 17 and he's sitting next to you smoking pot and drinking beer and watching TV with Isis that don't bother you he says let me tell you something I said what he said I would rather have my son smoke weed here and drink beer beer here and that way I know he's safe and he's not going to get hurt or get in the car accident kill himself or hurt somebody else at least he's safe and he's enjoying himself so he's as in certain things in life you have to think outside the box because the things can go wrong real fast and if it goes wrong you may never take it back or might it not even see them again sometimes you got to leave your children make the right decisions but sometimes you can and Trust goes a long way with your children
My kids didn't have a computer or cell phone while they were growing up. They got one when they were able to buy it themselves so I didn't have to worry about what they were doing but all bedroom doors were open at all times anyway
Yes, I would allow kids to close their door. Yes, I would knock before entering. Unless I had reason to do otherwise. You adjust to the kind of kid you have. I never got in trouble as a kid, so I didn't have strict rules I had to follow. My brother, on the other hand, was constantly in trouble, so he had strict rules. Things like being able to close or lock your door was a privilege that could be taken away, but you weren't automatically punished before you even did anything wrong.
I think I would especially if I have teen daughters. I don't want to walk in when they're changing. I think it's also a good habit to learn how to knock outside of the home.
I don't think 12 year olds should be taking nude pics but I would hope to be a good enough dad for that thought to not even cross their minds.No not in my house my girlfriend doesn’t like any doors shut for any reason the only 2 that are shut is the main doors and bathroom if someone is in it. She would say to our oldest at 24 years old why is your door shut.
Well I wasn't allowed to until at least high school, mainly because I couldn't hear my parents yell for me when the door was closed, so I think I'm gonna stick to that.
I think privacy is a good thing. It's been standard but upon that agreement is a knock that should have a time limit attached to it. I think it could be as little as 10 seconds with no reply. But I think privacy is healthy especially if they need it, especially for girls as they tend to have deeper emotions that take some time by themselves to adjust to
At a certain age I'll allow them to close their doors. Somewhere in their teens I reckon. There comes a point when they have a right to privacy but up until then I plan to teach them best I can to not use that privacy to surf porn, sex chat, smoke weed or have sex with their window-sneaking boyfriend (if I get a daughter). Not that I'm expecting to face a window-sneaking boy in my window, or he'll be a window-falling corpse when I'm done with him.
I let my daughter keep her door shut. We do knock when we come in. She had to earn my trust for the privilege. If at any time I suspect her doing anything I wouldn’t approve of she loses the right. I randomly check her phone and tablet. She’s not allowed to have any passwords.
I think a Child's computer and phone should be monitored and parents should be able to see what sites they are going on. It's so sad that a 12-year-old would be taking nudes and yes in that instance a parent should make them keep the door unlocked what the issue here is these kids are 12 and acting like their 24 and they're not
I think it's fine to have it closed. I hate it if I accidentally left my door open. No locks though I say is fair. To me if it's a reason of trust to not let them close the door there's some issues there in the relationship and disconnect. But it differs for the family dynamic I think. Close the door on social media at least.
Yes. Children are still people. Everyone deserves privacy. Providing shelter as a basic standard requirement of a parent doesn’t give you the right to intrude.
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Kids should be allowed to close their doors and have privacy just like adults. I don’t need or want to helicopter over them. I also reserve the right to enter when I want, though I do generally knock before entering.
In my house only 1 out of the 5 bedrooms has a lock on it. And that is the master room. The kids rooms don't have locks on them for safety in case a fire would break out, and the parent (s) needs to get in, and other reasons.
My house is a safe place. I will let my kids have their girlfriends in their rooms with the door closed and I will respect their privacy.
They can close their doors. And I knock.
my daughter already went through some stuff that she is very mature dealing with stuff like that. I don’t have to worry about my kids in that way because we take openly about everything.Yes they should be able to close their door and expect privacy. A knock is appropriate and should be common sense.
Not sure about locking the door, mine doesn't have a lock.My siblings and I were allowed to close and lock our doors AND my parents always knock. So, I would most likely do the same for my kids, although, I can see myself just barging in instead of knocking. 😂
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