What would you think if a close friend kept saying they were "too busy" to see you?

[Anonymous]

Would you think that "busy" is a legitimate excuse to not see someone for a long period of time? I haven't seen my friend in 6 months. She replies late or doesn't at all. I asked her if we are just drifting and should I stop talking to her but she says no we are still best-friends but she is "busy" with work and with her boyfriend, and I get that, but she sees her other friends almost every weekend? Do you think busy is an excuse or a legitimate reason for not keeping in touch?

[sage2021]

When I used to call my friend Pam who moved to North Carolina - each time she would say "I was just going out the door and I can't talk". She never said "I'll call you back later".

Finally I took the hint that she no longer needed me to be her friend/phone friend.

But when she was single and her boyfriend kept screwing with her head, guess who she would call and want to talk for a very long time? Me!

Us she dropping a hint to you and you just haven't picked up on it? I would call her out on what she's doing to you and just put her on the spot and ask her. Even if you do this, she might not want to tell you that and just keep shinning you on.

[Asker]

Well that's what I thought. I asked her "Are we just growing apart because I never see you anymore and we don't talk" and she goes "No not at all, I'm just really busy I want to see you but sometimes life just gets in the way. Sorry for the late replies.." It's just annoying being lead on bc she WAS my best friend.

[Dinklex3]

Nope.

People make time for the people they want to make time for.

A day? Sure. Weeks? No. I get pretty busy and talk to some friends about once a week. I make time for them because i love and care about them. Even if I'm working 13-14 hours every day that week.

[Asker]

I agree

[boggboss]

I think differnt people have different requirements for how much they need to see eachother me and some of my friends don't see eachother sometimes for months but when we are around again its like we are still in school life sometimes just gets in the way

[TheVigilantOne]

I’d think they didn’t want to know anymore and I’d cut them out my life. No one is “to busy” to talk to anyone.

[Asker]

I agree.

[ShellyB]

If somebody is too busy one time that is normal, it happens. If they are too busy two times ok. If they are too busy many times then it is not something they really want to do. There could be many reasons for that, maybe she is losing interest in the friendship or maybe she is doing something or is seeing somebody she does not think you'd approve and she is avoiding conflict or who knows. But she does not really want to talk with you right now for whatever reason, I would give it time don't make any rash decisions just see what happens. JMO!!

[Guccigabbana18]

Yeaaaah that's an excuse in my op. People make time for who they want. Even the busiest people see the people they care about. This isn't your best friend.

[Asker]

I agree

[dustybiker]

Friends come and go. Sometimes you have to let them go.

[Asker]

I agree, it's just annoying when they lead you on like this or say you're still friends.

[dustybiker]

Yes. Sounds they are just hanging on too.

[Paris13]

Farewell Feather No Feather Friend to the End. She ONLY Wants YOU when She-------- NEEDS Something. xx

[jamesgoldman]

Well are they, I see most of my friends once or maybe twice a year as we are all busy building our respective businesses and we communicate by email because it's easier to keep a trace on stuff than anything said verbally would be

[Agape93]

I understand. My best friend and I see each other only a few times a year now. He's married and works full time, states below me. Long as he calls back I'm good

[Asker]

What if they don't call back tho? And they take weeks to reply?

[Agape93]

I'll call his wife. If he's ok and busy, cool. If he's ok but doesn't want to talk to me anymore, I'm going to see why in person. If he's not ok, I'll do what ever is necessary to correct the situation or bring reprisals on those who caused it.

[Wise4myage]

Sounds like its time for you to expand your circle of friends.

[exitseven]

They are no longer a close friend

[Massageman]

time to change their status

[Anonymous]

You are never too busy for real friends.