How to react if your mother is having an affair while still being married?

[Cheulyn]

My mom is dating a guy and says that no one understands her, and yes I been mad ever since, I tried to side with her and understand her, but she is taking advantage of that way too much, she leaves every two days and it takes her 24 hours to come back and check on me and my sister. I am worried because my father works at night so I have the responsibility of my sister, even if my mom was to be in the house she will keep calling her "boyfriend" instead of spending time with us, my father tries to make me (and my sister, tho she still doesn't get affected as much) forget the chaos with my mom during the day time, but that is something my mom sees as he trying to convince me that she is the villian of the story :(

[SnowedIn]

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. It probably feels like a no win situation and in many ways it is.

My advice is to stay out of it. Take care of you and take care of your sister.

I come at this having lived a similar situation with my parents both of whom carried on affairs before finally getting a divorce.

Trying to influence or change their behaviors almost never works.

So make sure you and your sister have what you need and leave mom to do what she does.

I know that's not a pleasant answer and doesn't necessarily change/fix what you're living with, but I believe it's the lease drama/least impact to you and your sister. Anything else is likely to be worse.

[Wise4myage]

That's a tough spot to be in, but your father deserves to know. You could tell him anonymously.

[Cheulyn]

But he knows and tries to pretend nothing is happening because my mom can have a mental breakdown anytime (yes, she tried hurting herself before)

[Wise4myage]

Then their is nothing you can do.

[Celticwolf78]

Sounds like she is getting tired of her marriage because your dad is working nights and she is not getting the attention she needs sounds like your dad needs to quit nights before they get a divorce

[balyai]

Talk to your dad about it