Is it ok going to parties with your wife if your child is older and can take care of himself?

[Anonymous]

We were just 17 year-olds when our son Adrian was born. We're now 34 and he's now exactly the same age we were.

Adrian has his own friends, his own social life, can drive, cook for himself if needed and can handle himself. My wife and I have been going to a couple parties on some weekends. We don't drink much though but it can be refreshing after some stressful days at work.

Updates

3 mo

Our Adrian is in 11th grade. He'll be moving out next year after his HS graduation.

Updates

3 mo

Both of us feel that we missed out on some fun. Now that Adrian is older and can take care of himself, we feel there is more time available for us.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I think that's great as long as it doesn't come at the cost of neglecting your parental responsibilities which should be quite minimal by this point.

Something my wife and I really enjoy which you might be able to enjoy more the following year when your son moves out is to throw adult (I mean only in the sex of drinking and not feeling like we have to moderate our behavior around minors, nothing debaucherous) home parties. We get to maximally socialize with all the guests that way instead of being guests at someone else's party and don't need to deal with designated drivers or taxis.

It sounds like you two already have the hang out it but just in case, I'd suggest to keep taking it easy. I was also deprived of a lot of partying growing up to prioritize my studies, but once I graduated from uni, I went totally berserk and wild with weekend nights blurring into each other with copious amounts of alcohol consumption. There's nothing really all that appealing about it in hindsight to be so wild and it can actually be rather miserable over more wholesome fun. So that's my only suggestion which probably isn't needed!

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

Only in the sense -- what a horrible mistake! I really don't understand why this site doesn't let us make edits. It's my only complaint.

[Asker]

Yes we're practically done with parenting him. We can still give him helpful advice whenever he needs help on matters or wants to speak to us though. In a way, being a young parents has its advantages too.

[jahaims]

He is 17.. literally old enough to join the military and go to war and you are worried about doing something social and leaving him alone. He is a coddled weakling with parents like you.

[Asker]

Well he already has his own social life and goes to his own parties so we don't coddle him much. We trust him and he'll be moving out next year when he graduates from HS. We were just thinking of how Adrian would feel seeing us going out for often lately.

[petitedollbabee]

I see no problem with that. He’s old enough to drive, be able to take care of himself, he’s not a child - he’s closer to an adult.

[Asker]

Thank you. Yes our Adrian will be moving out next year. Time flies so fast and finally we can enjoy our time alone.

[EmmaMary]

You so richly deserve to start enjoying life once again... So do so without feeling any guilt.

[Asker]

Thank you. Being a parent earlier in life has its advantages too. I've enjoyed every single moment of our son's younger years and I don't regret anything. I believe things happen for a reason and play out the way they do.

[EmmaMary]

Thank you for the MHO.

[Anonymous]

Yes of course, but if you're at parties and he has parties at home while you're gone, there might be another 17-year-old around in 17 years.

[Anonymous]

Yes indeed. Go ahead and enjoy life 😊