When I was very young my parents would say about me and my neighbor friend that we are like a couple and we would be so cute together, and whenever we did anything nice for each other they would say it was because we liked each other and were flirting.
I hated that it made me feel embarrassed to even hang out with that friend. I was a kid and we were just friends, why did they have to make things so weird like that? Then as I got older they would always ask if I liked anyone, if I met anyone cute, and then teasing and more questions and even dating advice if I ever answered anything other than "no."
I've heard similar stories from several other people over the years, it seems like some parents are way too eager for their child to have a romantic/sexual relationship and try to pressure them into having (or pretending to have) one before they want one or even know what that means. It's very weird to me and I don't think it's healthy for parent or child. Why would they do this?
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I can think of two scenarios. Firstly, maybe the parents used to live an "adventurous" life when they were youngsters and wants to "relive" those days in their own kids. Secondly, which I believe more in, is that parents don't have an insight into their children's life (since most of your daily time you are either at school/work, practices etc) that they want to know what's going on in your life and also might want to know if you are lonely and/or have an active life.
Most kids don't share their life experience with their parents - both the good and bad. So parents will try different ways to get into their lifes and one aspect is to be eager for their kid to be in a relationship. So they can talk about sex with them and/or know that they are doing alright.
If you want your kid to talk to you about their relationships or sexuality, why would you tease them about it any time they show signs of actually having or wanting one? Why would you think a toddler or young child would be having any sort of romantic relationship? Surely nobody is ever "adventurous" at that age unless they're having a reaction to abuse of some kind..
Well, as a parent you probably has seen the rapid change in history that you fear your child is exposed to much more than when you were kid and hence would implify different things for their kid to open up. As an example, when my folks were 6-7 years of age they used to mostly hang with their parents and played with toys etc. When they hit puberty there were so much stricter rules and regulations in society that they used to flirt but that was literally it. Sex, relationships, showing interest to someone etc was out of question. When I was in 6-7 I used to hang out with friends and was exposed to nudity on television and society was more opened to the idea of showing affection towards someone. When I hit puberty, I lost my virginity since the society was more adaptable towards porn, sex, relationships etc. And now recently, my nephew of 6-7 had asked questions related to sex which made the parents talk about sexuality and relationships. They are exposed to so much content through apps that its frightening. My point here is that in time each generation of parents have seen the development in society and their kids exposition to it and have tried different ways to get them to open up. As its become the new norm in society that its OK to have boyfriend/girlfriend at younger age, some go about it that its cute and they feel if their kid doesn't have it, they may end up in the wrong path or be exposed to this in the future in a harmful way. Others feel its a way for them to become closer to their kids, so they can open up and tell them things they otherwise do not necessary tell them. In each generation folks tries different ways to get closer to their kids cause the world is shaping and the belief that if your kid doesn't do one thing the society has classified as OK, then something may be wrong with you. At least this is my input in it.
I don't know man I feel like with your nephew if the kid brings it up and they're just informing him that's cool, I know knowledge is important to protect kids from abuse and help them be safer when they do start having sex. But I think there's a very clear difference between informing your child by giving them the talk or whatever, and pressuring the child into telling you their personal feelings when they don't want to and may not even have any feelings like that. One is you are telling the child something, and the other is forcing the child to tell you something. I didn't even get "the talk" from my parents they didn't care about telling me how sex worked or anything like that. They just wanted me to get in a relationship and get married and have kids. And so every time they tried to push me toward that path, and assumed I wanted it just because they did. They weren't trying to connect, they were just trying to control me. Parents like you're talking about, they're fine, I understand that. But that's not the kind of parents I'm talking about. I'm talking about the ones who are weird and forceful about it, not helpful and open.
that doesn't sound right
I’m sorry your parents did that to you.