Guys hate always initiating?

[Rosesss]

Guys, how OK are you with always being the first to text a girl even if she always responds back instantly and positively?

And do you believe a guy really has to like a girl to keep texting her first when she's never the first to initiate?

Does it bug you at all; the fact that some people may think it's not macho for a guy to NOT initiate first?

[PHILR]

1st how would you feel if all the work of the house in your parents house was or needed to be iniated by you all the time . you'd feel your doing all the work while the other members took advantage of that fact. right well apply that to texting /phone calls or anyother such type thing with someone you like or are in a relationship with. a relationship is a two way street traffic should flow both directions and not just one way.

the only thing that should be at times(there are exceptions tp the rule) that the guy iniate is the 1st approach , the 1st date and or 1st call or text. after that again it should be a two way street.

with neither having to carry the ball all the time.

thats my opinion maybe not a popular one but my opinion

[sinful1620]

As a guy, I'm constantly the one who has to know everything, do everything, and make every decision. I have to initiate, I have to ask the girl out, I have to chase her, I have to make plans, I have to go out on a limb, I have to kiss her because she won't kiss me first, I have to...

Our culture puts an insane amount of pressure on guys to perform and act and decide all the goddamn time. So yes, it's extremely nice when I get a break.

[Rosesss]

but if a girl practically NEVER initiates will you still go on chasing her? :)

[sinful1620]

I don't chase women anyway, for other reasons. My current girlfriend and soul mate damn near lost me by being busy with just a touch of flaky because I thought she was trying to make me chase her.

[Rosesss]

aa I see...

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[Anonymous]

mine is the opposite - I always initiate the text msgs, but I get a reply waaayyy later, or the next day... f*** that! its THEE most retarded game EVER! if I like you, I text you. if you like me too, you text me back instantly... its unexcusable! EVERYONE nowadays answers their phone almost immediantly when it rings, or makes a text message noise! so when they say "oh I didn't get the msg" it means.. you read it.. and friggin ignored it because you're trying to 'be cool' well its not cool. its lame - and I agree with CarelessWhisper! (i'd date you! lol and sinful1620!) haha

[WeaponZero]

When I find that the girl isn't putting forth what I feel is significant effort, it kinda makes me feel like I'm being used and she's only keeping me around until the next guy comes along. If she wanted to keep me and make me feel like she cared, she'd do things that required notable effort on her part to carry her end of the relationship, and that includes initiating some of the time.

[Anonymous]

Know what? I've been a pretty reserved and shy guy for the most. And every girl who eventually got close (not necessarily in a sexual sense) was the one who saw the possibilities, took the initiative, and made the first move.

Maybe it's a subconscious fear of rejection too. If a girl is interested in me, I can't lose, right? I'm cool with her taking the initiatives, except she got to be a bit subtle about it... shouldn't come across as demanding or bossy.

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[CarelessWhisper]

I can't stand it when I'm the one who always has to initiate the conversation. An instant reply doesn't guarantee she likes you, sometimes it just means she's a polite girl who doesn't want to hurt your feelings but she'd much rather be talking with someone else. The longer you're forced to initiate, the more you feel she has nothing to say to you

[Rosesss]

oh :/ and how does it feel if she initiates?

do you ever think she's bothering you? because most girls won't initiate with a guy they really like cause they might seem 'annoying' ... in fact it's more OK for them to initiate with a guy they DON'T like cause they basically don't care if they seem annoying lol, that is how it is sometimes believe it or not..

[CarelessWhisper]

When I hear my phone go off and see her name it's the highlight of my day and never fails to bring a smile to my face. To me it means she was thinking about me and couldn't wait to talk to me. There's nothing better than knowing a girl you like actually likes you and wants to talk to you. No matter what time of day it could never annoy me

[Rosesss]

that's so sweet and basically the same for a girl... but if she's not sure if you like her or not then she'll think she's annoying you and just think of texting you without doing so, hoping you would

[maroon12west]

Our culture pressures men to do all the pursuing and to face the possibilities of being painfully rejected. And yes I really hate it.

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[BleachFace]

Yeah it sucks big time, makes you feel as if you want to talk to the girl more than they want to talk to you.. silly little games are for 12 years olds

[Rosesss]

I can imagine of course, we're all human beings with the same emotions; both girls AND guys =/

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[Killfest400]

Yes. If I'm the one that's always initiating, then it seems like she's not interested. I want a girl that's interested in me, not a prize to say "I caught her".

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[moviedude714]

Yes I hate it with a huge passion, because if I'm initiating everything, that means the girl is doing little or nothing to contribute, she is just along for the ride and I'm spoiling her, which I hate

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[heythere]

I feel like the girl should start initiating. If she doesn't, I feel like she's not interested.

[Rosesss]

and would you just stop initiating if she never does? even if you really like her?

[heythere]

Yes. Because I would feel like she doesn't even like me enough to text me. She must not like me the same way or as much as I do.

Why wouldn't a girl randomly initiate a text or give a call sometimes?

[Rosesss]

true, true, I must agree

[arashmenalagha]

+1

[braidednylon]

not really. To me its just like an unwritten rule kind of like how the guy always pays on a date.

[Igotyourback]

I think that if a girl doesn't initiate at least once she isn't interested and that by messaging her she thinks I'm a weird kid/stalker/annoyance

[IN5AN1TY]

Its gets rather annoying having to initiate ALL the time, it shows she is somewhat lazy, and also not interested.

[defytraditiongirl]

a lot of guys want girls to contribute to the relationship