I think I can probably (definitely) help you with some tips. If you send me a message (I'd message you but you're anonymous) then I can learn a bit more about your specific situation when it comes to shyness. And help you with like the specifics to get you more confident around this guy you really really like. :)
I do think that you're looking at this from the wrong angle.
So your fundamental question should be "how do I become less shy"?
It... is really the wrong way to look at it in terms of "what personality traits do guys find attractive" because...
Well, you have whatever personality traits you happen to have. That's you. The combination of those traits, and their exact ratio is what makes you..."you".
So the way this is written seems to suggest that you are more... thinking of working on your personality traits. That is fundamentally the wrong way to attack this problem. And... actually a really unhealthy way to go about "working on yourself"... It is also entirely possible that I'm misinterpreting the way you actually see this.
Anyway. You aren't 'creating an attractive personality' made up of traits that guys are attracted to. You are not even trying to accentuate, highlight or increase those specific personality traits that guys say they like.
You are you. You need to BE you. Always.
It does not matter AT ALL what personality traits guys may find attractive. You either have them as a trait of the person who is "you"... or you do not have them as traits of 'you'. You cannot create new traits you don't have. That's just faking it.
We are looking to change ONE trait about you. The shyness. That's all.
So NOTHING about your personality should be changing as part of working on yourself. It's just about making you more comfortable showing him WHO YOU ALREADY ARE. That's all anyone can do. Show them what you're about as a person, and see if they like it. Shyness prevents you from showing someone who you are because you're unable to relax and just be yourself. Don't try to change your personality to make it more attractive. That's not the way to go :)
Outcome independence is a start. This is where you know in your heart of hearts that no matter how things shake out you know you'll be just fine. This frees you up to say and act the best you know how without worry. Carry your head high, take as much time as you need to get to know, and see where it goes.
It's not really about 'personality traits'. It's about YOUR level of attraction and desire for THEM. That's what guys are really looking for. Cuz without that nothing is going anywhere fast.
And don't use 'shy' as an excuse. Social skills are learned, you can be as competent as anyone else in your ability to converse. It does take desire, and practice. It is quite possible you have some or a lot of introversion, and that just means you're as happy on your own as you are around others. And that a lot of social interaction wears you down. But introverts are not and do not necessarily need to be or are shy. Again, communication skills are learned. I know, I am one.
So here's your homework...
From today on, every where you go, every day, for every person you come into contact with in your every day travels, try striking up a conversation with them. Get good at drawing people out - they just love to talk about themselves. This way when Mr. Right comes along you'll have no problem striking up a convo and keeping it going. You'll be at ease, right at home.
Be confident, be open, the world is your oyster.
From what i saw on GAG, men love it when you're completely against feminism and promiscuity. They love it when you say women and men are not at all equal. Also when you make it clear that you follow traditional gender roles and so you will be a housewive. Act like this and you will get men on your feet
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I always think there is an element of truth to cliches "Be Yourself" - Is there any catch all traits that all guys like for instance some guys like the Miss Popular, Cheerleader, Girly Girl, Extrovert, Party Central and others may like the Shy, Quiet, Deep Thinking girl.
People just click for whatever reason and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
This guy you like , what do you know about him? , have you any common interests you could talk about.
Maybe just start by saying "Hi" to him a couple of times and see what type of reaction you get.
For me, yes I prefer confident girls, independent
some of best ways to gain confidence and simplest, is to go to local shops and talk to shop staff, ask where certain products are, ask if they have a certain size, even talk about the likes of TV’s, Electronics goods, sports goods etc with shop stafff.
this gets you used to talking to complete strangers about literally anything.
when you get used to that, start with small talk about weather, something that’s happened, ask what it’s like working there.
even chatting on here can help, as I helps you think on your feet if chatting to someone, and increase your level of self confidence.
your clothing, hair, makeup can all help your brain get to a confident level, it just needs little boosts in different places and then it’s happy, you then get that confident boost.
does that sounds do able?
You're so right. We do find confident girls more attractive. I would also say confidence is different from personality traits. A personality trait I like is thoughtfulness. A girl can be thoughtful and still not confident. I like girls who are good listeners, but then have something intelligent to contribute to the conversation. I also like girls who are funny, and don't take stuff too serious. Fun & funny are attractive to me. I also realize those are hard for a shy girl. I have 2 suggestions that are guaranteed to boost your confidence. Getting fit, A. K. A. working out and I would suggest finding a Toastmasters club and practice public speaking. I know it sounds weird, but HOLY COW I promise practicing your public speaking will have a huge positive impact on your confidence. Ask any woman in business.
Be pleasant to be around. Don't debate every little thing. Joke and be playful, but for the love of all that's holy; recognize when your jokes aren't landing. There's nothing sadder than watching someone who doesn't know how to be funny go around offending people because they don't know how to tell jokes.
I like shy and innocent there's a seduction about it that's I find very beautiful but she also has to have a beautiful heart confidence be able to talk with her eyes a nice smile happiness and a very good lover and smart I can tell you right now just from your question do you are a very beautiful person on the inside so that probably is the same for the outside
I get you, I'm like that too. I open up slower than others. Which screws it all up. But you can not think of what men want. You have to think of what do you want? What are your values? What can you live with and without? Mostly likely best way to meet people for you, is doing what You like, put yourself out there. I was doing that til this covid messed it all up. I did first lessons of Sala, hoping to learn and meet new people with same intrests.
It's not that guys don't like shyness. It's better to be confident but shyness is fine. It's more that when you're shy, not saying much, avoiding eye contact etc. you come across as not interested.
u Confidence for the most part yes many guys will also like a girl thats shy but its so much more work when it comes to getting to know a shy person
Faithful is what matters the most, you want to know your girlfriend isn’t gonna cheat. But happy and nice are usually good.
It’s ok to be A LITTLE SHY.
if you really like him, maybe see out the things he likes, and try to start a conversation with him on that... try to spend some time with him. Hunie, I hope he also thinks your cute or isn’t seeing someone because I know ladies ain’t good at dealing with rejection.
Modesty and humility, it provides insight on their individual character. It’s involves the manner in which they present themselves physically and behave around others. Less than adequate behavior is now being tolerated in public as of late.
I think shy women are attractive. Overly confident loud mouths are a turn off. As long as you are kind and receptive to someone talking to you, then you should be fine. Sometimes shyness gets misinterpreted as stuck up
A good sense of humor, caring, honesty, integrity, loyal, slow to anger, slow to judge.
Some whos nice to me and doesn't go off to someone else then very quickly starts a relationship with the new guy after me.
Intelligence, kindness. Shy is fine. If you are too shy to have a conversation, guys will assume you aren't interested. You really really like him? Have you had a conversation with him?
I don't open up so easily as well so that's find for me and actually guys like shy girls.
you seems good girl to me
Just be yourself... Do not seek approval or change! Just be yourself
be funny and please dont pout ur lips. we really dont like that.
I'm am the same way, and girls don't give enough time to get to know me they just think I'm weird.
Quirky, kinky, free spirited gypsy type, not afraid to put on a baseball cap or go without makeup. Spiritual but not a religious holy roller. animal lover.
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