Boyfriend wants a female roommate?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is military and just got stationed at a new base on the opposite coast from me. He found an apartment he really likes, but can't afford it with a roommate. The only person he knows there who needs a roommate is a female lieutenant from his platoon. He asked me if I would be OK with them living together, and I said no way. I trust him and know he would never sleep with her, but I am still not comfortable with the idea. It seems really inappropriate.

He asked how I would react if he went ahead and did it anyway and I told him honestly that I didn't think I would be able to stay in the relationship. He said he wouldn't pursue living with her but is very mad at me (I am not totally sure why, I might have come across as angry when we talked about it but I don't think so) and said he would call me when he wasn't as mad. That was 6 hours ago. Am I wrong for not wanting him to have a female roommate?

I would really like a guys perspective on this.

[TheUglyOne]

If she's from his platoon, there's a good chance that the relationship will strictly be roommate/roommate. Especially if he is enlisted, a romantic relationship would then be considered fraternization and subject both of them to disciplinary action. I can understand both of your situations. On one hand, him not being married he won't get as much (or any allowance) for off post living, so having a roommate is sensible. Still, he needs to empathize with you. A female roommate makes you uncomfortable, and he needs to address that. And the military does provide on base housing even if it's not the best for single soldiers.

I'd find out if he would be comfortable with you having a male roommate lol.

[Prof_Don]

I say that he should TRY to get a male roommate.

But if push comes to shove, and it's either he has his female lieutenant as his roommate, or is homeless...

...

...would you REALLY be this deal-breaking about this?

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This is his boss, and the military is strict about this stuff. I'm quite sure nothing will happen. :)

[taster]

I've had female roommates before and I was not involved with them..I guess I have a hard time seeing it an inappropriate...I mean she would have her own room...right? How is that any different from a dormitory?

[moaterboat]

If you trusted him you would be okay with it. Since you are not okay with it, you obviously don't trust him, in spite of what you think.