Should I give up on him after he rejected me?

[Anonymous]

I have had a crush on him since a long time I have seen him in person many times but he hasn't noticed me because we never actually talked to each other. One day I decided to text him and we talked and I confessed that I like him he said he does not like me like that. He hasn't even met me in person and we did not even have any sort of conversation even over texts! so should I try again after getting rejected or should I just move on? I mean would my chances improve if we meet in person may be he will like me? and how exactly do I approach him if I want to?

Yes

No

[meowcow]

I think most people would have rejected you.

I would feel really strange if a girl I never met, and never talked to suddenly confessed she liked me. Stalker much? No matter how gorgeous or awesome you are, you crossed a lot of red flags before starting the race. There's almost no recovery from this.

Let's say you're sitting on the bus, and some stranger confessed that they've been in love with you from afar, watching you go to work/school everyday on the bus. You'd probably start taking a different bus to work. Do you get it? You're the crazy creeper!

Perhaps crushing on him blinded you to your actions. Take a step back, and think about how this whole situation would appear to him. I don't think he was moved in anyway by your confession. More likely, he just wanted to get the hell away from you.

[Scoopie]

I'm sorry, but I don't think it's worth it. If you can't even have a conversation over text, then he probably already feels like you're nagging him. As stupid and stubborn as it seems, it's like he already has his mind made up and is preventing you from coming any closer.

You can of course give it another try, make sure it's a casual setting where you can easily talk. If you notice he's trying to cut a conversation short or preventing one altogether from happening, it's a clear sign that he's not interested. Try not to approach him when he's with friends, because by talking to him alone you'll slightly improve the chances of having a conversation, no matter how short. Having friends around will distract you both and make him want to ditch you asap, plus he'll have a better excuse to ignore you.

[Anonymous]

Uh. If he's gonna be that inconsiderate then he might not be a good choice in the long run. Maybe he bluntly rejected you because he's not interested, or he's taken. But if he actually was somewhat interested, he shouldn't be so straightforward with telling you he doesn't like you. If you guys do meet in person, try to forget that you have a crush on him and be as normal as you can. Otherwise he'll think you're desperate. Don't get your hopes too high up though...I've been in this kind of situation...

[CrystalMinds]

I suggest you take things slow. Don't flirt with him or all that, just let him get to know you, how you are and show him you're fun to be around and you're a great girl. Once he gets to know you and all that, maybe you can flirt a bit and see where things go. He doesn't know you (yet), so ofcourse he doesn't like you in a special way. Give him a chance to get to know you and who knows :)

[koffindancer]

I think that having not met him formally it was a little silly and desperate seeming to confess your feelings for him so early but that doesn't mean that you're out of luck. You have a bit of an advantage that you haven't met him formally. I think that you should try to talk to him over Facebook or text for a while before making a move. After a while invite him to something with some mutual friends and try to talk to him in person at that point. The main thing is, try not to look too desperate but at the same time show interest. Make sure things move at a controllable pace but don't try to control it yourself (if that makes any sense). Good luck and hope this helps! :)

[Scoopie]

I had someone give me almost the exact same advice a couple of years ago, and it didn't work at all. I never got her to meet with mutual friends, she simply refused and avoided every single opportunity to actually have a conversation in person. When the person is showing no interest at all, you can't convince them. Strangely, talking on FB was no problem at all.

[koffindancer]

I agree that you can't convince them if they don't have an interest with who you are but this guy hasn't got to know her. The guy turned her down because he didn't know her. Until he turns her down for who she is, she still has a chance.

[Asker]

Yes we have never met in person formally and he refused to talk over text too...he said I am too young for him considering the fact that I am 23 and he is 28 I don't think its much difference! he just told me that to push me away. Also when I confessed he said he doesn't like me like that and he can offer is friendship. But what sucks is that he refused to even talk so I doubt he would want to meet me in person. what should I do?

[koffindancer]

I think that all you can do is talk to him subtly, through Facebook or over text or something like that. If he doesn't reply then there's not much else you can do than give up, in which case it's his loss! :)

[HandsomeRaj]

1. Since you've already expressed yourself to him, the moment you give up on him you may find him sauntering after you :) - that's a general man lol

2. Understanding that nature has made men and women differently for various reasons, unlike women (generally) on who persistence has a positive effect and she begins to like a persistent man more the same need not necessarily be expected from a man. He may either get irritated / agitated or even if he does give in it may not generally last longer than the initial stages. Ofcourse there are exceptions to every situation.

3. It's not a question of ego but logical thinking and understanding human as well as individual nature.

Your call :) good luck

[Anonymous]

Maybe just consider moving on.

I mean, you don't want him liking you just for your looks, and currently he only has your personality to go on. Doesn't mean he doesn't like your personality, but maybe he would rather just be your friend instead of risk ruining it?

And I know, that sounds cliche. Fact is though, some people can't imagine still being friends with someone if they get in a romantic relationship and then break up. A girl once told me, when I told her that I'm still best friends with my ex, that we weren't ever in a real, serious relationship, because that wouldn't be possible.

I, however, disagree wholly. Just two types of people.

But sure, there's a chance he could like you in person, but you just have to ask yourself if you think it's worth it. Sounds like you have him as a friend (maybe? It's a little hard to tell from this question), so you may want to tread lightly with how hard you try to push the possibility of a relationship.

[Deviouscourage]

Well in this case you're not automatically disqualified since the guy never really got to know you...

But I would just say that you have a disadvantage now.

If this were to have happened to me, I would be expecting a fun, active, outgoing, funny girl to change my mind.

[Asker]

i was all that with him...fun active outgoing and funny! I don't know why he got thrown off plus he lied saying he was moving when he actually never did:/

[charmingfrank]

Move on. Guys like to hunt. But sometimes its welcomed when a girl tells a Guy she likes him first. It really depends HOW you do it without becoming EASY, so to speak. Good luck:)

[blackeagle007]

Why would you keep pursuing someone who isn't interested? It's a waste of time! You gotta move on

[tiredofwaiting]

Well how long have you been talking to him?

[Asker]

we only talked twice over a period of 6 months! I asked him if we can get to know each other he refused!

[tiredofwaiting]

I'd drop him he doesn't seem interested in you at all.