Girlfriend seems distant?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I have been together for just over a month now but we've known each other for almost a year. We're super happy, I love her, she loves me, it's great, however. Recently, past... almost two days she's been sort of ignoring me. Usually we call each other every night and stay up and even during the day and even sometimes we have silence but it's fine we're just happy to be talking to each other. However today she seems aggravated, maybe annoyed? Giving short replies like "yeah" or "cool" (which we always say cool but like this is in different context then normal), she says nothing is bothering her and I dont want to keep asking and being persistent. Last night like every night I said "I love you" y'know like normal, and she always says it back but last night it was like mumbled. I dont know I feel like I could be reading too much into it. But all of this like, shutting down opportunities to talk or seeming as if she wants to just end the conversation really worries me. Like I said before I already asked her if she's fine she said yes and I said ok because i dont want to be like "oh are you sure? You sure you're sure?" And stuff like that. So any advice on what I can do or say that will possibly make things better, also if it helps to know I'm seeing her tomorrow. So yeah, thanks.


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[williael]

From what you describe, it does seem like there is evidence to suspect something IS wrong.

The behavior you're describing is how I act when I am either hurt or offended, and I close up like that.

I also act like that when I would like to tell my boyfriend something, but there's something difficult about telling him, so I clam up.

Some females do that when they've heard something upsetting about their boyfriend, such as a rumor that they said something or that they like someone else.

It's not really fair to freeze up like that without telling the other person why, but sometimes we do it to protect ourselves from the hurt. Withdrawal is sometimes easier than having a tough conversation. OR sometimes we do it because we are just plain stubborn and we refuse to have the conversation we need to have.

I wonder what she would say if you said, "Something has definitely changed between us; I can sense it, and I know it's not on my end. Please tell me why you don't seem to have much to say when we talk." You could say, "Have you noticed this tension between us that wasn't there before?"

A last thought: There are also times when girls get super-emotional and/or really stressed. Sometimes we close up when we know we're being super sensitive, because we're trying to control our emotions. Like, we don't want to cry, yell, or say something we can't take back, so we say as little as possible.

I hope you guys can work things out and get back to normal!

[Asker]

Thanks for the advice it was really helpful

[williael]

You're welcome; I wish you the best!

[Miss_karen_]

Perhaps she's having personal problems that she just isn't comfortable telling you about at the moment. If it's only been 2 days I say give her a little more time. Relationships aren't easy and you'll hit snags like this every now and again. I'm sure when she's ready she'll tell you what's on her mind.

[Asker]

Thank you

[duanemc86]

She was mumbling because there was a dick in her mouth.

[Asker]

Nice