I feel like my friend has been kind of off lately. I have tiny feelings for her developing but we’ve been spending a lot of time together and have opened up about everything and complimented each other. She’s flirted with me a few times though but I didn’t think anything of it because she told me she she’s flirted with friends but lately it’s felt like there’s been more than that. She’ll give me a lingering gaze and touch and compliment me. Some days she’s openly flirted with me and if things got awkward she’ll claim that she’s “joking”.
I’ve been liking our vibe but I kinda feel like it’s been off since the other day. I went to her family’s house on Saturday and I had fun meeting everyone and her and I went off to the side a few times to talk and drink and smoke a cigar that we shared. I ended up leaving around 9 pm because I was tired and also cold and I texted her that I made it home safe and she didn’t answer until the next morning ( she usually answers right away ). We didn’t rlly text the next day and when I saw her at work today she told our other friend how I left her house early. Also she told me how after I left, a guy that I had been socializing with at her house was interested in me and was asking if I was single. My friend told me that she told him I had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn’t looking for anything serious and also she told me she played the bi card and told him my sexuality. ( I’m bisexual and so is she ). I’m kind of offended she did this because she never knew if I was interested in him or not ( he’s not rlly my type anyways ) and I don’t like telling every single person I’m bisexual. She didn’t tell me this info until 2 days after when I saw her today. Why did she act like this? Am I overthinking?
I’ve been liking our vibe but I kinda feel like it’s been off since the other day. I went to her family’s house on Saturday and I had fun meeting everyone and her and I went off to the side a few times to talk and drink and smoke a cigar that we shared. I ended up leaving around 9 pm because I was tired and also cold and I texted her that I made it home safe and she didn’t answer until the next morning ( she usually answers right away ). We didn’t rlly text the next day and when I saw her at work today she told our other friend how I left her house early. Also she told me how after I left, a guy that I had been socializing with at her house was interested in me and was asking if I was single. My friend told me that she told him I had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn’t looking for anything serious and also she told me she played the bi card and told him my sexuality. ( I’m bisexual and so is she ). I’m kind of offended she did this because she never knew if I was interested in him or not ( he’s not rlly my type anyways ) and I don’t like telling every single person I’m bisexual. She didn’t tell me this info until 2 days after when I saw her today. Why did she act like this? Am I overthinking?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Whoa that's a lot to unpack. A couple thoughts on your friend's behavior:
- Her flirting with you and lingering touches definitely sounds like she's into you more than just friends. Hard to play that stuff off as "joking" all the time.
- Her acting differently/distant after you left her place with that guy and not replying til morning is a red flag. Sounds like she could be jealous.
- Her telling the guy you just got out of a relationship and throwing your sexuality out there was way overstepping. Like she was marking her territory maybe?
- Waited two days to tell you about it seems sus, like she was tryna play it cool but also let you know what went down.
- Girls don't usually play games and get territorial like that with "just friends." There's feels there on her side I think.
Tread carefully. She might be catching real feelings which could complicate things if you're not on the same page. Definitely have a real talk to get on the same page about boundaries and what you both want before it gets messy. Protect your heart too!
Thanks! Also I didn’t leave with the guy from her place lol I didn’t know him well enough to do that and I kind of have feelings for her too I just wish she would be upfront with me
Ahh I gotcha, my bad for assuming you left with that dude! Yeah between the lingering looks, flirty touches and now this weird jealous behavior - it's pretty obvious your friend has feelings for you too bro. Girls just don't act like that with guys they're not into.
I feel you though, it's frustrating when they aren't upfront about it. Leaving you guessing and pulling shit like sabotaging other guys gets old quick. Next time you're alone together, I'd straight up tell her something like "look, I'm getting vibes you might see me as more than a friend too. What's the deal?"
Girls tend to appreciate it when us guys are direct about our feelings. Get everything out in the open so you both know where you stand. Maybe she'll finally admit how she feels and you can take things to the next level! No point wasting time if you're both feeling each other. Stay confident when you have the chat - let me know how it goes!
Wait I’m a girl lol. Sorry if that was unclear. My friend is bisexual but leans more towards women and so do I.
Oh whoa haha my bad! I read that wrong and assumed you were both guys. Okay, now this makes a lot more sense with you both being girls.
In that case, I'd say she's definitely into you for sure. Girls don't usually get jealous like that over just a friend. And dropping subtle hints to flirt is like, classic gay hair flirting lol.
Next time you're alone together, you should totally just ask straight up - "So are we just friends or is there more going on here? Cause I kinda think I like you..." See what she says. Worst case she says you're pals, but I'm betting she'll admit she likes you back.
Don't overthink it, just go for it! And good luck, hope you two get together. It's always cute seeing gay couples at school. Keep me posted how it goes! Rooting for you guys.
Thanks!!
You’re welcome