Question for guys... why would you flirt, smile, wink, check us out?

[pinky100]

If you have no intention in making a move?

Or maybe you are and just not that active, indicisive etc..

Is there just a sexual attraction then for just looking, smiling etc all the time and not approaching a girl?

What the real reason you guys check us out but don't make move?

[PrinceofFoxes]

Well, the winking bit would maybe be just flirting for flirting's sake, I think.

The others could mean anything. Nearly any red-blooded male will check a girl out. If a guy does it repeatedly, he is really attracted to a woman. He might be too shy, think she's out of his league, be in a relationship himself or think she's in one.

Smiling is sometimes almost an unconscious action, rather than an intentional signal. Could be he is happy to she such a beautiful woman, perhaps in a particular action like smiling herself, rather than a signal of confidence.

Anyway, it is well known guys are worse at reading body language than woman.

Amusingly, I have heard that woman check out men nearly as often, but their eye's are different so it is less obvious because they don't have to focus on a spot to see it.

[pinky100]

He checks on me every day.. makes sure he sees me and have a little look of me. or what attracts him to me... smiling always: when he sees me, talking on a phone and sees me and when I talk to him... he sometimes gives me a smiles where i can read regret... what if... some of them are cheaky, pleased to see me!

[Anonymous]

guys desire beautiful girls, but guys risk rejection way more than a girl ever does, so guys are not going to make moves, guys know when we are considered ugly/unwanted to a girl so its really the girl whos supposed to make the first moves, cause its the girl who chooses the guy and plus from experience I've been rejected every time I've made moves and so did other guys i knew,

[pinky100]

OK so I Made a move. I broke the ice and he is still like I say ' being fish on ice'. Indicisive. What I decided to do.. is as I showed my interest its up to him to come and get me!!! Am not going in any conversations with him as long as he will initiate it!!. just ignore him..

[Opinion Owner]

if you want the guy you need to continue making moves, and initiate things, you dont just do it once and expect everything to be his job after, it doesn't work like that, a guy will get it if he understands what you want from him, but that doesn't mean you stop initiating then ether, and every guy is afraid of doing something wrong and end up rejected cause that tends to happen a lot

[pinky100]

haa no.. if i only making a move showing my interest and there is nothing nothing coming from a guy-then NO!. Am not going to go out of my way to talk to him, when if I do... he doesn't ask questions back. Missing some questions I asked... so no! Well i think two month is enough to do it after me saying hi and try talking to him.. trying make him talk at least!
Yes, he will need to show interest back.. i was winking and smiling when i was 18.. am not 18 any more!

[Opinion Owner]

well of course a guy will talk eventually, and winking and smiling doesn't do anything to show interest or make a guy talk to you, a girl approaching and telling her feelings etc does, you can't just say hi and walk by

[pinky100]

So by winking and smiling every day does not mean he wants to talk to me? Just stop doing it. No need to wast my time and his! As I said am not 18 to do that... if a guy does it every day that clearly shows Interest... if not. Think he is brain damaged!

[pinky100]

Ha a bit too far to express my feelings... he can't even ask questions back... plus that what he does says hi, how are you. Think my initial decision is right- IGNORE!

[Opinion Owner]

ooops i thought you were doing the winking etc, yes he's interested and no dont ignore, you have to reciprocate and approach him, ignoring a guy isn't going to get you a guy, he's already making the moves and you say you are too but how are you making moves and showing interest?

[pinky100]

I have approached him.. I just feel when I talk to him its a bit like... shabby. maybe he prefers smiling instead... don't think he puts enough interest in conversation... its either nerves or something else.. I will, just slightly!

[Opinion Owner]

maybe he wants a girl who knows what she wants, and not a girl who acts innocent and distant, he seems shy but doesn't want to make moves on a girl cause guys have to worry about coming on too strong or acting too desperate/clingy and end up turning a girl off, guys have to wait till the girl reaches that stage first thats just how it is

[pinky100]

He doesn't know anything about me... and the reason is.. he wasn't putting effort in conversation. If he would then he might know what I want or know... except how I look he doesn't know anything... come on. He doesn't ask my name for gods sake when I asked his... he is not coming as anything yet... all I can say the reason I want to ignore him a bit as except winkin and smiling and saying hi to me for now - there is nothing from him in 2 month!

[Opinion Owner]

i see now, the guy isn't interested in you in "that" way

[pinky100]

That's why I want to ignore him!!! I am not wasting my time on someone stupid like him... he will have to find other attention giver And check them out!

[pinky100]

Is he interested any way.. as he flirts with me? what kind of interest is that then?

[Opinion Owner]

maybe he's just being friendly, and your confusing it as flirting

[pinky100]

Ha.. interesting.. when am friendly and not interested I don't check same guy each day and turn my head over to look at him every time he passes. I consider it pointless and waste of time... I'll be friendly ones but not every day say hi etc, checking a guy staring at the window door... maybe its a new way of showing friendliness...

[Opinion Owner]

does he already have a girlfriend? maybe he likes you/attracted but can't have you

[pinky100]

I THOUGHT ABOUT IT... WHY HE IS LIKE THAT... I never asked.. i don't know if he does have anyone OR NOT?

[Opinion Owner]

you should ask first

[pinky100]

Won't it be too coming to strong? well, did ignore him today... I saw him... but looked somewhere else and past... he obviously looked straight away he see me ans turned all his attention from his mate to me...

[Opinion Owner]

ignoring a guy tells a guy your not interested, thats annoying and confusing to a guy, and dont worry about coming on too strong etc a guy likes a girl whos forward

[pinky100]

Ha ohh come and did he show any signs of interest so far except of smiling etc... let him be confused!!! Maybe it'll teach him something... maybe next time he would actually want to know more.. am still there to look as he wants.. but am not looking as often as I used to.. will glance just seldomly and smile back!!!

[Opinion Owner]

your just teaching him he's not wanted, your not going to get a guy to like you doing that

[pinky100]

Ohh poor him haha! He will feel unwanted... no am still gonna look just less. Shall I then ask why he is smiling and whether has a gf or not next time I see him?

[Opinion Owner]

thats up to you

[pedro28]

sometimes we men become overwhelmed with fear thinking that there is a possibility that you might not like us back so we flirt, wink, etc and show interest hoping that you could give us an extra nudge to show us that you like us back or for you to make the first move because we men, although we pretend to be tough brutes can be just as fragile as women.

[pinky100]

even if i made a first move and shows interest and winked smiled back.. is it not enough? i did all that.. seems there is nothing coming from him except silly smiling and checking out...

[pedro28]

hahaha yes, I'm sorry but we men can sometimes be very hard headed in believing that a woman could not love us for who we are. sometimes you could even ask out a guy and tell him you love him but some guys just can't seem to believe a woman would have interest in them.. try to help nudge him a bit more and ask him out..

[pinky100]

ohh no... i wouldn't we are not nearly as that!.. come on i think i showed plenty of interest.. think there is something wrong with his head if he is not responding well too pretty girl... no no no... i actually decided to ignore him.. see if he makes a move! ice is already broken anyway..

[pedro28]

hahaha I know its just an example... yes he probably doesn't know his self worth, doesn't have much confidence/ low self esteem... give him time he will learn, in the mean time go after some else.

[pinky100]

I already decided to ignore him and started to do it recently!

[pedro28]

Good, I'm glad. but seeing that you put up this message I can tell you still like him. don't ignore him completely, but just give him some space and time to miss you.

[pinky100]

Ha yes... I'll still be there if he wants to look at me... but I might not respond to him as quick as I did and show places I used to...

[pedro28]

no please don't do so, because if he does decide to do something he will feel its too late. be warm, friendly and open with him when he takes the initiative to talk to you but if he doesn't then don't bother.

[pedro28]

I used to make mistakes like this, that's why I know and actually i recently did so, there's a girl at my college and we'd go to the gym and she came up 4 inches from my face and blushed hoping that I would ask her out and I didn't, because i was dating someone, and now I try to contact her, through FB, because I can't find her in person and she's completely ignoring me... I'm going crazy about her and i can't stop thinking about her hoping that i'll find her again to ask her out... its not nice to feel this way so please don't ignore him if he tries to contact you in some way, we men are dumb and stupid but some have good hearts.

[pinky100]

Hey.. that's what I will try to see.. if he will contact me first. as I said I am still there still available to look at... but to give him space an miss me he has to miss our talks and the only way it happen me not initiatiat conversation... still say hi, but not that quick.. it will make him think... make him wondering... maybe miss! .. than if he contacts me does mire effort i can see how good is his heart.

[pedro28]

perfect! I love your plan. don't sell yourself short because you deserve the best.

[pinky100]

Oh I am.. if I won't t see movement... sorry he will be gone.. can seek attention elsewhere..

[pedro28]

haha good. good luck then and may you have a wonderful romance life.

[Frank_B]

I think that any attractive woman deserves that men react to her charm or beauty. Women should be proud of such reactions from men, this is healthy. I don't necessarily want to have sex with each woman I compliment, I like sex a lot but it is not the only thing which rules my life.

[pinky100]

He doesn't compliment.. just looks and smiles...

[Frank_B]

Then you should be proud to induce such a behaviour. This is a great therapy you offer him! Life is so beautiful for us guys thanks to you attractive women :)

[pinky100]

Haha... I might do please his eyes as he checks on me dayle!

[Frank_B]

He's a lucky guy if you ask me.

[Anonymous]

Honestly? Fear. I have so many friends that all check out that one girl that walks by, but even though I'm standing RIGHT NEXT TO HIM... I still have to ask "Did you see that girl?".

We're not as open as girls think.

I don't make a move as I said above because I fear rejection. And although some people say "Yeah, but it builds you up", I'd simply rather not ask her out and spare the embarrassment.

[pinky100]

OK so if girl approaches you... that girl you checking every day haha?

[BertMacklinFBI]

i wouldn't check you out but i would smile and stuff. ill totally compliment you and then go on about my day. those random compliments really make a girls fucking day!

[pinky100]

He can't even hold a simple conversation.. don't know if he knows what compliment is?

[BertMacklinFBI]

he must be nervous as hell, are you like totally super hot around him? hahah

[pinky100]

Yeah like always.. showing my figure. Look my 100%. super hot!!! ... cheaky a bit too :).. Smiling back and winking... say hi... shall i ignore him?

[BertMacklinFBI]

well that depends. how much do you like him? and by the way fucking [phone] on the super hot profile! hahahah:D

[BertMacklinFBI]

might've been confusing. when I say profile I mean how you described yourself

[pinky100]

Haaa u like my discription of myself ha? that's me... no i madly do... but am starting loosing slowly interest... so not surprised why he is nervous then?

I don't want to ignore him... but want to see if he actually start pull conversation with me. He says hi first anyway each time ha.

[BertMacklinFBI]

mm maybe you just gotta give off 1 strong hint that will give him the courage and motivation to start pursuing you

[pinky100]

Like what? I already making conversation with him... I started to act bit coool around him now!

[BertMacklinFBI]

well it has to be super obvious because conversation won't be enough. what do you think is super obvious to let a guy know you're interested? usually touching is a good one.

[pinky100]

OK like slightly? try that... if he plays dumb than he will have no chance... plus I don't want really start doing more with a guy who can't even hold conversation and show interest that way!

[BertMacklinFBI]

exactly! if he can't prove himself to be the man you want him to be then you will waste your time. some guys need time and some push to come out of their shell but if you honestly feel like it ain't gonna happen then you know what to do. or you can keep trying:) but yeah slightly touching is a good one, make sure its not a casual touch though. it has to be more... hmm... intimate i guess.

[pinky100]

Ohh no.. am not making any moves.. he has to grow first haha and prove himself!!!

[BertMacklinFBI]

you already know what you're doing!:D hahaha wish more girls were like you!

[Anonymous]

I check out 100s of girls daily. Its not possible to approach each one of them. sometimes the girl is hot/cute but just not your type and sometimes you are not confident enough to approach a particular girl , reason could be anything like you might think she is out of your league or she has a boyfriend et cetra..

[pinky100]

Ok if girl makes move.. says hi.. showing clearly interest... if you can't approach girl and only winking, checking out... what the point? Any hidden thoughts ideas he might have towards me?

[Opinion Owner]

He's DUMB

[tionik06]

Rejection is a big one for single guys, confidence boosting is the other for guys who have no problem getting it.

[pinky100]

Obviously if he is winking and says hi.. he is not shy?

[tionik06]

You are correct

[pinky100]

So what could be wrong with him? Or is he just attracted and likes looking at me?

[Dragonblood21]

Nerves, don't know whether you are single or not, alcohol isn't present in the blood (hey that's a big one for me TBH).

[ThreeIn]

Are you gonna buy every car you "check out"?
No. So why would you expect every guy that checks you out to make a move?

[pinky100]

Then no need to check Me out every day!!!

[ThreeIn]

I get the feeling your question didn't ask what you really want to know. I also get the feeling you're talking about a guy that's been looking at you but hasn't done anything. If that's the case, why didn't you just ask what you wanted to know? Giving incomplete info is a sure way to get useless answers.

[pinky100]

read my post above... yes. no need to check someone every day... and he only checks me!

[ThreeIn]

I read it the first time. You never mentioned it happened every day, and my point is, you should have.
Ok do you want him to make a move or are you just wondering why he hasn't?

[pinky100]

i made a move first after two month.. as i couldn't bear it.. yes i wonder why he doesn't?

so i started to make a small talk but feel like he is more interested in winking and smiling rather than talking.. he does talk but a bit shaby hahah

[ThreeIn]

He's either crazy, stupid, or shy.

[pinky100]

i don't think he is shy if he is winking and says hi to me... answering my questions...

[ThreeIn]

ok then he's stupid.

[pinky100]

Could he have a gf? Don't know if he does..

[ThreeIn]

Nah he's just stupid.

[Insaan]

I have fear that woman might not like me and may be she is already taken hence not making any move. But this is only me.

[pinky100]

OK if woman makes move and guy is still... thinking ha ha... being indicisive, doesn't get a hint... what more can she do?

[Anonymous]

... because it's AMAZING fun, seriously especially when the girl reciprocates -it strokes the ego, call it attention seeking

[pinky100]

no more attention seeking.. as i started to ignore him..

[Opinion Owner]

careful you don't kill a real spark though, just because I flirt fraudulently with some girls it doesn't mean i don't also flirt with the ones i really like, perhaps he's waiting for the opportune moment

[pinky100]

Ha what for 2 month? How many more month shall I give him?

[Anonymous]

if you are not sexually attractive, we will most likely not initiate flirting. we don´t make a move, because we are shy, don´t dare to or are not in the mood to.

[pinky100]

what for 2 month hahah?

[Opinion Owner]

sorry i don´t get that comment xD

[pinky100]

what you not in a mood to make a move for 2 month?

[Opinion Owner]

hmm no i guess it´s either the shyness or not enough attraction then

[pinky100]

From his side?

[Opinion Owner]

yes and from yours too ! xD

[pinky100]

Haaa I broke the ice.. I was attracted. Now i don't know! He puts me off by how he is!. so winking and checking me out every day... that means no signs of attraction here?

[Opinion Owner]

i think it means he is still attracted in a way :)

[pinky100]

Coz he is.. just not a talkative kind :(

[Opinion Owner]

too bad :)

[pinky100]

Maybe some guys comfortable with only smiling and eye contact... I find it too strange... .

[Anonymous]

Because were attracted to women lol simple. And we also like to show our affection.

[pinky100]

He been winking and smiling for 2 month till I couldn't bear broke is.. he is still quiet indicisive to me... I am not making any more contact. I showed my interest.. no affection there. If he wants winking like teenager he can try!

[Carlos22vs4]

Perhaps you could approach first?…. Seriously

[pinky100]

Yes I did... now waiting for his move..

[Carlos22vs4]

Maybe he is not that into you.

[pinky100]

He is... he is into me... or something from me...

[Carlos22vs4]

Mmm sure, if you say so.. An interested guy would at least say something.

[pinky100]

No he says hi.. hows my day.. is it nit enough?

[mario1321]

Afraid of rejection