Does your boyfriend occasionally 'like' other girls photos on Instagram? And does it bother you?

[Charlotte0204]

Not provocative just pretty selfies. In the comments, would it be possible for anyone to help me feel less fearful. I have obviously spoken to my boyfriend about it and I know it's not a threat really, but I still get anxious everyday.

Sometimes he will it doesn't bother me at all

Sometimes he does and it really bothers me

He never does it

[Hhhann]

Yeah, it bothers me. Mostly when it's mostly naked girls or something.

There's a time and a place for that and it isn't right in my face. You can look without hitting that button to the point where me and everyone else that follows you is seeing it.

It's not about insecurities, it's about a basic level of respect on two levels. One for yourself, and the other coming from your boy/girl friend.

Would he be cool with me liking half naked pictures of dudes? Maybe he wouldn't care. I wouldn't know because I wouldn't do it.

If it's disrespectful to verbally comment on someone you find visually appealing in front of your partner, it's the same across social media. Just because they aren't saying it out loud; to your face doesn't make it any different.

Of course people will find others attractive. That's just human nature. How you act about it is what matters.

"It's just social media!" Is honestly a lame excuse that comes from people who do this themselves.

[samhradh_leannan]

If my boyfriend did "like" or "follow" other girls (who were not his actual, real-life friends) then I would definitely see it as a problem. Social media isn't porn. It is not a private space for harmless fantasy. It is literally designed to communicate with other real people and to portray an image of yourself to the world. That means that choosing to "like" or "follow" other girls purely because you find them attractive is making a statement that ogling those girls is a priority in your life. That's disrespectful in my book.

[samhradh_leannan]

Keeping in mind that if these are girls who he is actually friends with, I have zero problem with it.

Following strangers just because they're hot is a totally different situation.

[Xx_DeeDee_xX]

I'm just going to be direct with you. I believe it's dumb that you'll be insecure about your boyfriend liking other girl's pictures. I don't know if you had bad experience in your past relationships ( if you ever had one in the past) but, you don't need to worry... just trust him. And if he's disloyal and dishonest you don't need him just move on without looking back.

[Charlotte0204]

I appreciate it thank u :)

[Xx_DeeDee_xX]

You're welcome hon.

[BrittBratt2416]

Does nobody think there is a line though?
If it's a picture like this, then yeah I see no problem and no reason to jealous:
www.lanlinglaurel.com/.../...retty-girl-images.jpg
But what if the pictures are nothing but girls like this:
cdn.cloudpix.co/.../...e9ef5f71f-large-1579553.jpg

To some women eye tucking other women is no big deal, but for me it is.. if that's what you want then go tucking get it.. don't stay with me.

[BrittBratt2416]

It just proves that this generation of people are selfish. They are never fuckin happy with what they have or what has been given to them. It's pretty much, I have a big cake, but I see someone has a slightly larger cake there for I want that cake.. but wait! I still want to keep my cake too.. but for later. This is the type of thinking people have now a days and think it's okay. Yes there are other attractive people in the world, I understand that.. but respect your partner by not making it so obvious.

[Zer0Ghost]

This has been asked a lot. And it's root, is really insecure. Other women exist. Other women are attractive. That does not mean you are not also attractive. That does not mean he wants someone else.
The only thing it means, is you need to sit in the discomfort in order to get past it, I know of no other way. Getting over it means realizing your own worth and your own relationships value. That cannot happen if if you get anxious you think of the insecure things rather than the positives.

[Kenni]

wise words

[Ginaxoxo54321]

It's pretty disrespectful to be liking other girls pictures when your in a relationship. very immature.

[Zer0Ghost]

It's very immature to think it means absolutely anything, it's immature that you're somehow the only person to exist because you're dating, and it's immature to think a damn "like" has some deep meaning, but I digress

[wittymilf]

Very wise indeed :) well done.

[Unit1]

I agree with you bro! No need for relationships with insecure girls. A real woman will understand :)

[ultra_violet]

some anxious feelings are hard to get past but this is well said and helpful

[Ranude2011]

Ginaxoxo54321, you are immature. It has nothing to do with disrespect

[krash2002]

I completely agree. There's always a more attractive woman around the corner, but it shouldn't have any effect on your relationship. As no male or female will be the most attractive person in the world.

[Brian-Brain]

There is nothing more I can add to this. A well deserved most helpful answer.

[Seppelson]

realy good answere I fully agree

[Ginaxoxo54321]

Haha I'm immature ok sure maybe I am. But I'm sorry to break it to you but there's no "real woman" who would be okay with her man constantly liking other girls pictures. and if you love a girl and she prefers you to not like pictures of other woman than why fight about it why would you keep doing it if that upsets or hurts her... even if you think it's stupid it dosent matter she dosent like it so don't do it.. just like how there are things you wouldn't like her doing wouldn't you rather have her stop doing it if it's something as small as liking pictures? r u gonna die if you can't like random bitches pictures?

[Zer0Ghost]

Are you serious? For one, "no real woman" is a fallacy (https://yourlogicalfallacyis. com/no-true-scotsman). For two nobody could convince me a woman who becomes insecure by acknowledging the existence of other females is worth my time, that's a fragile self-esteem. Third, if it's such an insignificant thing, why is it worth ending a relationship over?

I come home to one woman, I love one woman, she knows how much she means because not only do I let her know, but SHE knows her worth, SHE knows how insignificant a fucking "like" button is, and she is woman enough to know just because someone else has a selfie, doesn't mean she ever stopped being attractive.

It's petty, it's insecure, and it's showing of a low self-esteem, tf is "real woman" about that

[Unit1]

Yes exactly 🙂 no adequate relationship fails for a simple electronic like signal on social media.

[Ginaxoxo54321]

So if it's such a small thing then why keep doing it? so your problem is you think that a girl that dosent like her man liking other girls pics has low self esteem. why do you have to like other womans pictures if your so in love w your girl... just don't do it then if it's "such a small thing"

[Ginaxoxo54321]

and who are you to decide what a real woman is hahaha that's a joke boy.

[Zer0Ghost]

Why? Because liking a photo doesn't mean I'm in love with someone, let alone that you mean anything other than general solidarity, that's a ridiculous concept, one that I think would take LOW SELF ESTEEM to reach. There's something telling about a female who reads a Like to have sort of depth to it, more so that it has any impact about her own attractiveness. If you want a robot, by all means, these kinds of guys pretend to exist, but your concept of what love and relationships are about is seriously skewed

[Ginaxoxo54321]

sweetheart you obviously have a lot to learn about woman.. the most beautiful woman have the lowest self esteem. it's honestly pretty shallow of you to keep bringing up low self esteem as if it's some disgusting awful traight woman have. your seriously in denial if you think any woman would be okay with her guy constantly liking other girls pics that's so disrespectful especially if your in a loving relationship and she's told you that it makes her feel bad. if you really loved her you would just stop doing it who cares if she has low self esteem that shouldn't even matter.

[Ginaxoxo54321]

and also are you really saying that "real woman" never have low self esteem? your a child if you think that statement is true and obviously don't know how woman are at all.

[wittymilf]

You guys have been at this for days!! Get a room already :)

[Ginaxoxo54321]

Lol sorry girl. I can be hard headed when I think someone is completely wrong.

[David14]

I'll let you in on a secret. No matter how much a guy loves you, he's gonna pay attention to other women. He probably still has a fovorite pornstar, lol. It doesn't mean he's a bad guy, or that he's going to cheat on you. It's just that way, and women NEED TO learn to deal with it.

[hurtssogood17361]

🙌🙌🙌

[missmorgue]

14 years old with a lot of wisdom.

[David14]

So I've been told by tons of random strangers lol. Thank you.

[David14]

If only the few that thought otherwise weren't so ignorant and quick to turn my advice down because I'm "Just a child"

[Unit1]

I agree with you man!
Don't mind the ageists. Their rudeness makes their arguments not any more valid :P :) Can't take them serious. Just dismiss them and keep rocking!

[samhradh_leannan]

It's natural to notice other people even when you're in a committed relationship. I totally agree with you there. But that doesn't mean there aren't limits to what is appropriate. I don't think it's entirely fair to say that women NEED to learn to deal with any particular thing. It depends on the individual and the situation. If my boyfriend has a favorite pornstar, then I don't really have a problem with that, as long as he keeps it to himself. But if he is talking about it, making it obvious, "liking" them on social media, etc, then in my book that is incredibly disrespectful. And not something I will ever force myself to learn to deal with. And if he is "liking" girls on social media who he is actually friends with in real life, that's fine. But if he's "liking" random girls just because they're hot, then for me, that crosses a line. And I do not NEED to change my opinion on that.

[Unit1]

I love browsing pictures of cute girls because i love girls and the opposite sex and because i never had a girlfriend. I miss female presence in my life.
http://i.imgur.com/WUzK0b7.jpg

[David14]

So you don't talk about men that you're attracted to? You don't fool me. Most girls have "husbands" that are actors. Even wheb they're in a relationship. Whether it's respectful or not, it happens, and it happens a lot. If you don't learn to deal with it then you're gonna be miserable in your relationships.

[samhradh_leannan]

Not me. At least, not since I was a teenager. Partly because I don't pay a whole lot of attention to celebrities to begin with, but largely because I'm a very monogamous person and I don't feel any need to focus on guys other than my boyfriend. Do I occasionally think that another guy (celebrity or otherwise) is attractive? Sure, of course. I'm human. But it's not significant enough for me to talk about it, or rub my boyfriend's nose in it. In my book, that's very disrespectful. So far, it hasn't been a problem for me in my relationships, at all. And yeah, I see some people who are older agreeing with you. I am not just trying to play the age card here. But I really see this new trend of "liking" random hot people on social media as a very immature, undignified behavior. So this may not really be about age, but I do think it's about maturity. It's about choosing how you want to portray yourself to the world, because that's what social media is for.

[David14]

When you liked something it's saved lol. What's wrong with wanting to look back on it later?

[samhradh_leannan]

It's not wrong to "like" things in general. It just depends on what it is, and why. When you "like" something on social media (key word: social), you're actively choosing to say, "Hello, world, I would like you all to see that I like this person/thing". Social media is not private, it's not personal. It's not your own safe space for harmless fantasy. It's not porn. "Liking" something on social media means you're intentionally choosing to associate yourself with it in an open way. When you "like" a random stranger on social media just because you think they're hot, knowing that your friends (and girlfriend) will see your activity, then that makes a statement. It tells them that that's a priority for you. Enough of a priority that you want to make sure you can easily visit it again, even at the risk of possibly making someone feel uncomfortable or hurt. And that's where it becomes disrespectful. Why do you need to be able to easily visit it again? Why is it that important?

[David14]

Lmao. See, the problem with women is they think to hard. It's not that deep lol, we're not making any statements. Just liking something because we like it.

[David14]

Men are simple. I don't understand why women make things so complicated.

[David14]

Our life is like a penis. Simple, relaxed, and hanging freely. It's the women that make it hard

[samhradh_leannan]

Instagram is not an alternate universe where people inexplicably lose all their social cues and deductive reasoning. It's not a magical safe zone where where it's impossible to have an impact on those around you. It is, by definition and design, a social communication tool. You may think you're not making any statements, but that's literally what you're doing by using social media in the first place. Every post, every "like", every "follow" is a statement that others are INTENDED to see. "Liking" some random hot chick on social media when you know your girlfriend will see it is virtually the same thing as sitting down in front of your girlfriend and telling her "This model is super sexy, I'm going to save a photo of her so that I can look at it again later." It really is not nearly as different as you seem to think it is.

[samhradh_leannan]

The attitude that you can escape all responsibility and consequences just because you are clicking a button on a screen instead of saying words out loud is, frankly, delusional. That's not how it works. Actions speak, and they reveal your priorities. A failure to understand that is where immaturity comes into this.

[David14]

Good luck finding a good boyfriend since you can't respect their personal space.

[David14]

And in case you wanna me a smart azz, I know it isn't personal space and that it's online publicly. It's a metaphor

[samhradh_leannan]

Lol. Saying that paying attention to what someone posts on social media is an invasion of their personal space is like yelling at someone and then accusing them of eavesdropping. Your metaphor needs some work.

[David14]

Your self confidence need some work.

[samhradh_leannan]

You know what, it probably does. But that doesn't mean I can't also expect a reasonable amount of respect and decorum from my boyfriend. Luckily, I've never had a problem finding men who are mature enough to behave in a manner that I consider appropriate.

[David14]

Well good for you. Glad your relationships have been healthy so far.

[samhradh_leannan]

Thanks, I am too.

[Ginaxoxo54321]

It's totally reasonable that you don't like that. I would never ever be with a guy that constantly likes other girls pictures unless it's family or friends pictures. that's incredibly disrespectful especially if he knows you don't like it. he wouldn't like it if you were doing something that made him feel anxious and bad even if it's something you think is no big deal he would want you to stop. you should just tell him you don't like it and if hed a grown up and loves you he will respect that and stop doing it

[qwert1234]

If we switch it to:
Does your girlfriend occasionally 'like' other guys photos on Instagram? And does it bother you?

-No, she doesn't and no it would not bother me.
Why? I am confident she loves me. If she did love someone else, her loss not mine.
I mean it's just a like.
But if it evolved more than that - does staying with her really worth it if she likes another dude? Sure it'll hurt, but we'll get past it.

[lacorine197]

Bro, why stay with her if she likes someone else?

[lovelyhoneybones]

Males and females are different. We have a different way of thinking and acting. Everybody knows that. Either way, I don't like "hot" guys pictures or talk about other guys out of respect for my boyfriend.

[qwert1234]

@lacorine197 No one is staying.
What I meant is, say she liked a guy's picture - and for some reason got close and fell inlove - not my loss.

[Unit1]

I fully agree with this! :)

[lacorine197]

ah okay I understand now, thanks for clearing it up

[savalisk]

If it's innocent, I don't mind. I can admire the beauty of another woman and she can admire the beauty of other men. You're not thinking dirty thoughts or getting emotional about it, its just "Oh, nice shot." and thats it.

eg: I wouldn't get upset if she liked a shirt my friend was wearing or complimented him on his recent achievement of losing lots of weight in an effort to get healthy again. (true story)

[melanieeeB]

like that one! So true

[Anonymous]

Are you kidding me? Although he loves you it doesn't mean he just can't like pics of pretty girls. Let him enjoy his personal space.
You should be concerned if he asks a girl for number not if he likes a pic. There is nothing wrong in it. He still loves you

[Anonymous]

All these answers from guys are always the same excuse. I think men just try to cover up for themselves. I mean what's the point of liking another girl's pic if it's not supposed to mean anything? Can't they just look without "liking"? Then they want to say something like "What about when you like other guy's pics on Instagram"? Yeah, because guys post selfies all the time on Instagram like girls do. Okay. No they don't.

How does he respond when you ask him about it?

[Listening5]

For the memes

[Unit1]

BINGO Girl! We all want to cheat :) It's the entire purpose of us liking girls on social media.
We just tell you to calm down because we don't want our cover to be blown and be caught cheating! It is our very excuse.

/sarcasm

[Charlotte0204]

Says he loves me and it's just a picture

[Opinion Owner]

Did you tell him it bothers you, but yet he still does it? Because if so, he may still be a little on the immature side. If it's really just a "picture" and he loves you then he should be able to stop and respect you in real life instead of social media being more important to him.

[Charlotte0204]

He's stopped liking the more provocative ones. Sometimes he'll like the odd one that's a general selfies. It was mainly only cause I realised a while back he appreciated and ex's photo (they only went out for a month) guess I saw it as a threat.

[vishna]

One did, he didn't really like a lot of girl's photos but this one girl. And not gonna lie, she was super pretty imo-so, I asked him to stop liking all her photos bc she NEVER liked his back. And in my opinion he was just a little fan to her, and my boyfriend was not gonna be some other girl's fan.

He stopped when I asked, which I really appreciated, so, I stopped liking my Henry Cavill fanpage pics aka blowing up his feed with "X liked this topless photo of the superman actor" He didn't ask, but I felt it was the right thing to do.

[fish5]

Think about all the times you've liked pictures of guys. Yeah they may be attractive but it doesn't mean you're going to jump in bed with them. your boyfriend is with you because he wants to be. Just because you start to date somebody doesn't mean everyone else suddenly stops being attractive. i bet you still seem some guys with abs and think they are hot. but you still love your boyfriend. it just a picture. if he wanted to be with the girls in the pictures he would be. trust him. i know its hard. I've been there.

[tealnorth6235]

It used to bother me with my ex, but I found out later that he was cheating on me.

It hasn't really bothered me with my current boyfriend though, but he's never given me a reason not to trust him and we've been together for almost 5 years. So I'd say it depends on the guy you're with and whether or not he is trustworthy. If he's a good guy, I'd say you're fine

[Calixx]

My boyfriend does, and it bothers me. He used to go onto random girls pages and like old selfies of theirs, or he'd go onto profiles of people I knew and liked their old photos.

He still likes bikini photos and provocative photos of girls he knows/doesn't know. This bothers me a lot and I'd always bring it up to him. Now I just try and not look for anything. But yes. It still bothers me.

[Arcano]

I don't think occasional likes should be worried about. If it is an ex-girlfriend he likes absolutely everything from or someone who makes you feel uncomfortable, of course still mention it.
If there is anything to be more anxious about, it would be flirty comments. Whether it's a girl he knows or not, someone local or completely removed (like a model), there's something upsetting about finding those types of words left for another woman.

[ciscosqueen]

it doesn't bother me the slightest. he has a right as a man to be allowed to check out other girls. hell ill even point them out to him. i already know he's a big ass man n i have a decent one but if he likes em bigger so be it ill point out the chicks with the best asses. why should it bother me? there will always be a hotter chick but if he's loyal then you shouldn't have to worry about the next bitch to get a like.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

If you have a boyfriend who does this, i think you need speak up
and tell him just how you feel about things. I think your boyfriends
meaning no harm but see it's upsetting you so i would communicate
with him more so he is aware that this is bothering you.

[zeke0019]

This isn't something I'd do to my girl knowing it plays with her self esteem. I think it goes deeper than cheating and trust issues. It's got a lot to do with her as a person and if she's already insecure. Just because I think another girl's attractive though doesn't mean I'm cheating or breaking up with you to be with her.

[Curmudgeon]

Important question: Are these ladies actual people he knows? Or are they models or celebrities he would never meet in real life anyway?

[Charlotte0204]

Girls he is friends with. One he went out with in year 8 for a month but she's not particularly significant.

[BaileyisDarcy]

Don't know don't care, and I don't understand why a guy 'liking' any photo would bother anyone no matter what your relationship to him were.

Unless of course it was something promoting bestiality or murder, or something that points towards being a psych/sociopath.

[Abraham1231]

I have a girlfriend, and I do like girl's pics. My intentions are innocent and are not intended for harming the relationship i'm in.

[IdkJustNeedHelp]

Don't let it bother you. They're just pictures. If you don't have trust things will get bad. If he hasn't given you a reason to think he'd cheat on you, don't worry about it. He's with you for a reason!(:

[TheAli]

He's lucky that you feel jealous about it. It shows your affection nd trust me he's lucky.

[xButterflyKisses87x]

I wish some men would understand that lol...

[TheAli]

Do the same as they do. Make them feel same.

[Sara413]

Neither of us are on Instagram. He likes posts from friends on Facebook tho, some of which are obviously women. Sometimes pictures. But he doesn't like look through a bunch of "sexy" pictures of his female contacts or like those pics. Even before we were dating I don't think he had any interest in sexy selfies. Because they are lame and uninteresting lol

[melanieeeB]

it would not bother me, just because he likes a pic doesn't mean he is going to do something bad or whatever
Trust is really important in a relationship and I would even be to lazy to even look what he liked or not, I simply just don't care, as long as he is with me and loves me, that's all I will ask for

[DumbandDumbber]

Total bullshit, I wouldn like my girlfriend to like another guy on social media. Neither should she, little jealousy is needed or else why even care about your partner?
Both should be enough for eachother