Guys do you not like it when your crush talks to other guys?

[Anonymous]

There has been a mutual liking between this guy and I. We’ve flirted and it’s fairly obvious we both like each other.

But I’ve realised sometimes when I’m talking to other guys very normally (not flirting or anything) at work he frowns and looks pretty off. One point he literally stood beside me but while talking to this guy but did not even make eye contact with me and he goes silent.

Another time I saw him looking at me talking to another colleague and he looked not happy but when I locked eyes with him he looked away and walked past me really rigid.

So like im not sure what the hell is happening, is it normal for guys to get unhappy when their crush (not even girlfriend) talks to other guys?

[JSharp]

I can answer this. From my own experience, it can be jealousy or that idea of you probably do not like him as much as he thought since you're not going to him for help or anything.

Note that we like our crushes to come to us for help or just someone to talk to. If you do not do that and go to someone else, especially when it's a crush and not in a relationship. You're just telling him subliminally "She prefers talking to them and not me". Because you're also in a work environment, he does not want to make it super obvious either.

So I'm curious, would you find it attractive if your crush starts talking to other women and flirt with them instead of you?

[BleachedFixxxer]

I feel like YOU ARE SURE WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING... You like this guy... you think he likes you... so you tested him. You talked to other guys in a way that would make him jealous ONLY if he LIKED YOU. ... and he did get jealous... SO THAT MEANS HE DOES LIKE YOU... so if you like him too, NOW is the time to give him the "its ok, you need to come get me" signals... You seem well aware enough to know what to do to project those signals.

[Asker]

Are you okay? Don’t loose sleep over this. I do have to disagree I was talking to those male colleagues because they’re just colleagues and there was no intention of making anyone jealous. But I did get really confused when he did show signs of jealousy because I wasn’t intentionally flirting or in fact wasn’t flirting at all with these male colleagues. During both he wasn’t near the conversation until in one of them he did come and stand right beside me and looked unhappy. If I was intentionally making him jealous like flirting and touching other men I wouldn’t even ask this question because it would be obvious as to why. Yet in this case it was normal talking and he was still jealous or appeared to be so

[BleachedFixxxer]

LOl, I will loose zero sleep over this... My answer was simply an attempt to give you a glimpse into what HE is thinking (into his mindset) ... of course based on the little information given.

[everythingxanything]

I encourage the girls I like to flirt with other people. But you've got to have communication with someone and no one should be trying to control another person's actions without consent.

Honestly I'd say being unhappy+jealous of normal interactions between you and other guys is a bit of a red flag.

[Asker]

That’s what I kind of felt

[everythingxanything]

Romance should be fun, not intimidating.

[Asker]

Yeah it came off as a red flag that he was kind of a controlling guy. He is nice, humble and very sweet! Yet there are some moments which came off as a red flag like him looking unhappy / jealous when talking to other guys (normal convo) + looking pissed off at times and giving me the cold shoulder during other times and I sit there thinking wtf did I do?

As much as I would like to be with him because he seems great, I’m worried I’m already seeing signs that he may be he controlling guy or be emotionally abusive

[Asker]

And also I just got a bit more confused by his behaviour of giving me the cold shoulder one minute and then smiling and trying to get my attention the next minute?

[everythingxanything]

It's hard to know without seeing the interaction in person, and it could be for a range of different reasons.

Don't instantly start thinking he's certainly bad. It could be accidental, he could be shy, he could be concentrating. But he could also be trying to manipulate you or have some internal ideas about you or your interaction with him that he's decided are true because he hasn't talked to you about them.

The best way to find out what's going on is to ask him. Whether or not that's possible is a different matter. Ask him to meet you for a coffee and talk to him about it. Then you can either tell him he's fun but you didn't feel a connection, or that you did, if his behaviour was adequately explained.

I'd still stay wary though. A red flag once raised shouldn't be ignored completely.

[NoToriousROB]

if my crush or whoever i liked or was attracted to was talking to other guys, i wouldn't be jealous because i have an abundance mindset and know that there are other girls out there for me. My crush going after other guys wouldn't be the end of the world and would confirm to me that she wasn't into me without me asking her out or anything.

[tzdc21]

I think the answer is pretty obvious. Anyone who see their crush flirting with someone else wouldn't like it at all.

[warsevf]

Most likely he likes u. But we cannot say for sure. Some people are just jealous of everyone

[Anonymous]

guys who aren't as secure will think every guy wants to take the girl he's into, sometimes that's true and sometimes it's false... doesn't matter though because perception is reality

[Anonymous]

Its jealousy at its peak. He probably has created an image of you as something more to him than a colleague in his head.

[Rangers]

I don't care, I'm not threatened by them.