Does he like me or am I just a rebound?

[Anonymous]

Ok so I met this dude 2 week agoish. Never thought much about him until like a week ago, he asked me to hang and go to this event together with some other friends so i was like sure why not. Went over there, had fun, and then I went back home. Until, on the same night, I asked him what he was doing and he said nm so I went to hang over at his dorm room, and i eventually slept over there (there's no sex in this btw). During that night, he did tell me about his ex girlfriend that he recently broke up (lm guessing around july?) with and reassured me that there was nothing going on between them and i was like okay that's fine and we slept (at a different area). The next day I went through his instagram, and find that he still has pictures of his ex, and his ex still has pictures as well. So im like aight they still have feelings for each other.
Until yesterday, the dude snapchatted me again and was like hey do u want this free hat and i was like sure why not cuz i can give that to my roommate. I went over to his dorm again, went inside his room again.
I don't know, we were chatting, and he brought out his guitars and sang and i sang along with him and i felt like we were vibing a lot. We had this small pillow fight and I felt his arm wrap around my shoulder, and the next thing we were cuddling. We held hands for a bit. and we slept at a different area again.
This guy is really respectful and kind. but like is this a rebound cuz he recently broke up with his ex or is he into me?

[DamienDreams]

Too hard to say for sure at this point. He definitely could be rebounding right now, though, based on what you said. He's only been broken up for 3 months'ish and both he and his ex still have pics of each other, so it sounds like things there aren't quite over.

Rebounding is usually either because the person is used to having someone there to cuddle with & share things with but now there's an empty space there & they're lonely and looking for someone to fill that space. Or it's a tactic to make their ex jealous.

Either way, I'm not saying to write him off completely, but for the time being, guard your heart. If he's rebounding for the first reason, you'd just be temporarily filling an empty space. In those situations, the rebounder generally doesn't form a strong attachment with the "reboundee." It's just sort of an emotional stabilization relationship. Part of the grieving process, really. Those relationships usually end once the rebounder is "healed" because you've served your purpose. And the fact that you were in that role puts you in a bad place because to him, you are attached, subconsciously, to the previous breakup, which he is already trying to detach from emotionally. So you end up becoming the final attachment that he has to get rid of. Or they end up getting back together with their ex. This form of rebounding is subconscious and unintentional (he's not MEANING to hurt you or anyone else), but that's how it plays out.

In the second case (revenge), trust me... you do NOT want to be in the middle of that! I have and it SUCKS!! Makes for some really awkward situations and you're just being used, so nothing ever comes of your relationship anyway. This form is FULLY conscious and is intended to hurt people. And you don't wanna be with someone like that anyway cuz they'll intentionally hurt YOU at some point.

Your guy sounds, if he's rebounding, like the second case, though. So in your situation, like I said, I wouldn't write him off completely, but proceed with mucho caution.

[DamienDreams]

Thank you for MHO!

And by the way, I just realized, meant to say the guy you're talking about sounds like the FIRST case (trying to fill a gap, not doing it to intentionally hurt anyone). NOT the second case (revenge). My apologies!

[ImHere4You]

Let me start by saying at this point there’s nothing wrong with going on some dates but if you are considering it it’s way to soon for you to be calling him your boyfriend and being in a committed relationship.

You barely know him and his previous relationship just ended. You need to get to know him much better before it gets too serious. You need to know details about him. People have secrets and you’ll never know them all but you need to know some.

Having pictures of his ex doesn’t mean he still has feelings but he still might. Some people don’t delete them. If he’s constantly bringing up his ex and that he misses her or compares you to her most likely he’s not over her and doesn’t want to be single. Get to know him much better and make sure his ex doesn’t affect his life or his connection between the two of you and maybe someday start a serious relationship. There should never be a rush to do that. Hopefully he’ll start to show signs he’s into you if he is and you’ll know it. Good luck.

[WeaklyPiggy]

Yes your a rebound and he is projecting his ex onto you. He does not like you but the same things in his wx he sees in you.

Run girl please or give him 4 months and try dating he won't look at you the same.

[ImHere4You]

How can you tell he doesn’t like her from what she said? Please explain what he did that thinks she should rule him out so soon.

[spartan55]

Too early to tell, I would keep asking about the ex if you get more interested. Note I said TALK about it. If you base your relationship decisions based mostly by what you see on stupid Instagram then you aren't very bright. Play it cool, but DO NOT pull that hard to get crap.

[BeHappy1985]

Not even gonna waste my time reading this because ONLY HE KNOWS!!! THERE ARE NO MIND READERS HERE!!!

[Iron_Man]

It's only been 2 weeks it's way too early to tell