Guys, would you date a girl that you’re not attracted to?

[Anonymous]

So, I was dumped. My ex told me that he didn’t even find me attractive and proceeded to make fun of my body.

We met through mutual friends and another girl had liked him also and this particular girl was actually very pretty. Yet he didn’t date her or do anything with her. I told a friend I liked him, my friend told him and he started talking to me.

HE asked me out. HE initiated texts and convos with me. And HE asked me to be his girlfriend.

He initiated the breakup by the way. Said that I annoyed him and wanted to be left alone. He THEN told me he only used me our entire relationship for sex and never loved me. We were together for a year

He told me the only thing he found attractive about me were my breasts. And that he didn’t go for the prettier girl that liked him because prettier girls are more work. How was she more work if she already liked him?

I’m just confused. Why ask me out if he never thought I was attractive? If he only wanted me for sex, he could’ve just made it clear from the beginning. Why lie and make an entire one year relationship just to have sex with someone?

When he made fun of my body, he called me fat. I’m about 15 pounds overweight. However, he’s more overweight than I am.

Guys, would you be in a relationship with a girl you didn’t find attractive and only use her for sex for this long?

[newblinds]

Of course, yes, if I decided it was convenient for me to use someone for sex for a year then I'd definitely do it, especially one who serves themselves up on a platter through our mutual friends. All the better if the target is unattractive, I wouldn't have to spend as much time or resources to get what I want, they might even have self esteem issues which would hook them even further.

I could've gone for the hot one since she likes me, but those ones can end up demanding too much of my life, she just has so many options, and maybe I'd still be able to see my other attractive partners behind your back the entire time.

Why wouldn't I lie to the target about the relationship, I want easy access to sex and I actually happen to enjoy the target's breasts, and the person easily believes me when I lie.

After a while you were annoying to him and it was time to cut bait, he might be able to get what he wants elsewhere or have different motives. It's high time to be discarded and possibly to do it in a way to leave the object tormented and still obsessing over my actions.

I'll even be able to see whether I can use them for sex again if the thought strikes me while noticing a moment of weakness on their part.

[On_cloud_wine]

Is this how you go about things? Fooling women into believing you want to be with them for more than just sex? If so, why? There are plenty of women who are down for just sex. They won’t make you wait for it either.

[newblinds]

No, I was sort of roleplaying the thoughts of a certain type of person, wouldn't be able to know if it's the asker's situation or not, but I got the urge to make something a bit different since I was looking up narcissistic personality disorder individuals.

People who act as I've described don't seem to usually admit to their behaviour, they prefer stonewalling, and gaslighting, and straight denial even if they're caught on tape.

I have almost not gotten any women in my life, I could identify as forever alone, I would say incel but I don't have the hating of women the same way and don't follow everything they believe in.

[On_cloud_wine]

Just curious! But you’re dead on

[On_cloud_wine]

I don’t trust most women. Better to be single than be with the wrong person.

[BrexitAteMyLobster]

No, I wouldn't. He's just tried to hit you where you're insecure, because he's pathetic. Don't even let his poison into your head. It's all bullshit.

[Asker]

When he made fun of my body, the things he said were true tho. It’s not like he was lying.

[BrexitAteMyLobster]

To highlight things that aren't perfect is a long way from saying that they turn you off or that you don't like them. If I know that you're insecure about something then I can use that against you, even if I don't see what you are insecure about.

[Asker]

Yeah. But I don't know. I always said I don’t have an ass, yet he’d ask me for nudes of my ass. I never said anything bad about it, I just said it was flat. When he made fun of it, he said it was shaped weird and explained how it was weirdly shaped.

[BrexitAteMyLobster]

He was trying to hurt you. Think about it. What value was there in telling you this information? He wasn't doing it to be helpful. He deliberately targeted areas that he knew would get to you. Don't fall for it.

[Asker]

Thanks for your insight. I think you’re right.

Do you think he was being truthful in saying he never found me attractive? I just can’t wrap my head around that since we were together for a year. I’m just wondering if guys are actually like that.

[Randomawkwardness]

No, I don't think they would. Some people go for weak spots after a break up and well, it looks like he found it. They feel hurt and they want to cause you as much hurt as they can to make themselves feel better. Honestly, take it with a grain of salt.

[TravelerNikki00]

I wouldn’t date a woman I’m not attracted to physically and emotional spectrum.

[On_cloud_wine]

Pretty cunning fella... He knows it’s not that easy to get into every girl’s pants. With you, though... he took his time with only one thing in mind, even if it meant that he had to force himself into a relationship with you to get what he wanted, then had the nerve to break up with you like that, convincing you that you were the problem.

It’s easy for some people to eliminate people out of their lives who don't mean anything to them, with no remorse of how they make them feel. One of cruelest acts you can do to one.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

If you knew everything in the beginning itself, why the heck were you in that abusive relationship. The thing is you have low self esteem which that abuser misused please get some confidence you are how you intended to be be don't let anybody to Shun you stop them in the first attempt take it as a lesson learnt. Attraction always fades away have beautiful personality, character that no one can penetrate All the Best!

[Asker]

I didn’t know all of that in the beginning. Read the post again. I clearly said he told me when he broke up with me.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

But those comments on your Body would be in relationship right

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Leave the past in the past move on its just an experience you are more worth than that choose wisely but with open heart you have a bright future enjoy

[Asker]

No. They wouldn’t be. He PRETENDED and LIED. He told me he loved my body through our entire relationship. He didn’t tell me the truth until we broke up.

[EchoicReticence]

No, I wouldn't. The only time sex would be the reason to "date" would be if it were a completely and openly agreed upon scenario. But to take a cheap blow at someone else like he has... Is pitiful it's abuse and with guys like that you were never dating. You were just an object to him. . But don't let anything like that get at you. And you go out and do you, and find someone better whenever you want to. He is destined to fail consistently in his "love" life.

[SissyFrenchMaid]

I never considered my girlfriend to be pysically attractive. She's a large lady, not pretty. in fact she came to me wanting a relationship and i said lets be good friends
Over time I found myself liking her more and more and fell in love with her
I see so much beauty in her that what I previously considered unattractive has become reversed.
I love everything about her including her looks
We have great sex too

[Keekee333]

He sounds like a fucking asshole. Good riddance. Never speak to him again

[jason_pearce]

Sounds like a guy with huge insecurities I think he actually liked your looks and now that its over he acts like an asshole and that is fucked up the best after a break up is just leave each other alone

[ThisAndThat]

Assuming I dated at all, I don't. But no there would be no point in dating someone I wasn't attracted to.

[Plitty-Tank]

Potentially, just to see if we drew affection for each other but I doubt it will last.

[Asker]

So not for an entire year?

[Shy_Steve]

I have before and it didn't end well, So i won't be doing it again.

[Stoner710]

No I won’t I’d be friends but not date

[Dchrls78104]

No, I wouldn't do that to her or to myself.

[Anonymous]

Yeah this happened to my sister guys do this a lot

[OneManOnly]

Can u dm me?

[Gedaria]

Yes...

[DvntboiNz]

No never