Can you be just friends with a girl you’re attracted to?

[Anonymous]

I have had many male friendships over the years and a lot of them have ended because at some point I realize they like me and when I don’t share the same feelings back, they leave. It really makes me feel like shit. Am I not worth being around if there’s no potential of a relationship or sex? That’s kinda how it makes me feel sometimes. In particular there was this guy that i was friends with that knew I wasn’t wanting to date anyone because I had just had a baby, and my baby’s father didn’t want to be apart of his life despite telling me otherwise many times. So I was pretty broken. I like to have a lot of friends and he and I just clicked, I wasn’t attracted to him but dating wasn’t my goal so I didn’t care about that. This man was there for me. He was my best friend at one point. I thought I had a friend for life honestly. One day he drunk texted me telling me he was in love with me and made me angry with the inappropriate texts that followed. He never spoke to me again. I was heartbroken. This man meant so much to me for a long time, and I wonder if he knows how much he hurt me too. This was 4 years ago and I’m still upset about it sometimes. I just want to be able to have a male friend without having to analyze my own behavior to make sure I’m not giving off vibes that I might be interested. What do you guys think? Could you stay friends with a cute girl? I want to add that I don’t assume they are going to end up liking me no matter how many times it happened because I have bad self esteem so “they might be into me” is the last thought in my mind.

[ohshee]

I'm Like you, I have many friends , more Girls that are friends than guys, there are some that I've become very close with and it always seems to happen going both directions. Either they are interested in a relationship and I'm not at that moment with them or vice versa but I do have some very close friends that we both we're interested in each other. But you can tell the difference between having a real relationship I was just having a sexual relationship and with most have my good friends right now it was basically I felt anyway is going to be a sexual relationship and that's when you just have to be honest with yourself it's a would you rather be friends for long. Of time or would you rather just have sex with the person and the friendship and will only last until it last and sometimes that's a hard choice to make LOL I can usually tell the difference and I'm the one that if I see something or do something I'm going to say it and I have expressed it to a few of my really good friends that if we were to have sex because we know that's what it's all about it we we lose our friendship so we have decided not to have sex and to this day I have some very good good friends because of that we decided not to. And it's kind of funny because when hanging out together you might out of the middle of nowhere look at them and they will be looking at you and you know what that look is and you just kind of have to smile and Let It Go. But I can also tell you this when my last relationship ended it was a timely messed up situation but about two weeks after it ended in a period of a week two of my ex's friends at you over to my house not together by themselves and one of my friends and they started bringing up dating and stuff and I said no way I hate girls right now LOL I was just pissed off because it took me over 5-6 months to get my ex out of my house because she had no place to go so I was kind of angry but anyway they all three wanted today I told each one of THEM NOOOO!!! Lol and as a joke I said not unless you want to become friends with benefits my surprise each one of them said yes well for a few months it was great the blend moved away to go to school when got married and the other one got engaged I didn't even know the two of them even have boyfriends I think only one did but anyway yes you can be just friends you just have to be honest with yourself that's all and they have to be honest with himself

[Anonymous]

You can however there a catch on how much of a friend you can be. Best friends unless you grew up like siblings together then guys and girls just can’t be best friends unless one of the two swinging the for the same team or someone else is active in the picture to prevent catching feelings. May be shitty but if they just remaining your friend then they aren’t spending enough time on on their drive and finding a woman they can be in a relationship with. Now they can chat and hang once in a while but being like a close friend of the option isn’t available then they need to focus on other things more instead. For example I am a friend of this woman who I had a crush on but I place her more as an associate so that way I already compartmented what all I can have with her and focusing on hey don’t provide her all my time and energy knowing if I can’t sleep or be with her then use it else where such as getting in better shape or learning others skills and trying with other women.

[Danish87]

People say but I really don't believe that girl and boy can be best friends. One will fall for other.

Attraction develops may be due to physical appearance or because of their repo in friendship that draw feeling toward other.

Only scenario is where both were already committed has chance for not falling. But major cases one or both are single when developed friendship.

[Asker]

Yeah I guess I’m starting to realize that. It sucks.

[Danish87]

@sunnyshe yeah it sucks. What I have understood is that there is always give and take in relationship.
And so this don't work in friendship where you just become friend.

[Danish87]

@sunnyshe if like to chat, my inbox is open

[Avcfhcic]

I personally don't believe in platonic friendships, I think one or other gets feelings for the other either initially or after a while.
I'm friends with a girl and like she's stunning and I'm sexually attracted to her but I'm also just a friend and like I've never explored that but I wouldn't want a relationship with her.
I think it depends on the guy,, I don't see a girl liking me but I'm fine if I have feelings and she doesn't

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

Well, yes, because I'm not attracted to the 99% to be honest!
Plus, people in my opinion are much more valuable as friends than as partners!

[Asker]

Where are all the men like you then? Lol

[Jean-Marie_Céline]

Thank you, but I think this could be because in the opinion of my wife, I'm a ''block of wood'' - I just don't think about those things, I'm too focused on work and my projects for that!

[jjj101010]

Yes I’m friends with a few girls I’m attracted to. I don’t fuck them, I do occasionally fantasise about them though

[Lazi-boi]

Simps, take note of this story

[Anonymous]

Why don't you just try female friends

[In_Trance]

guys and girls can't be friends