Exchanged numbers with a quiet dude on the shy side. He works at a supermarket.
He had been sneaking glances for awhile then was a bit more overt and was even clearly flustered before I started striking up conversations with him.
All the body language is good or whatever and I had ZERO doubt he was very interested. The inly thing was that he never asked. me about myself but he has been observing me for a awhile.
Told his co worker I was interested in the hopes it would make him more relaxed once word got back to him.
It made him super nervous since he was hiding from me a but but I struck up a convo and got some stuff from his station.
The next time he saw me he left his station to run into me and was super comfortable.
Anyway, we exchanged numbers. He was a bit amazed and watched me walk out of the store the whole time.
I messaged him first and he replied.
*There is a langauge barrier*.
I messaged him asking about his profile photo because it seemed to be a joke in his language and I wanted to get it.
He took it that I meant I wanted his photo which he sent instantly (suspect since it was him in this really crisp outfit that he clearly didn't take right then) then he asked for mine.
I don't send photos and I said there was a misunderstanding since I didn't want his photo.
He responded with 'hhhhhh' and has gone dead silent.
Sent a message a day later complimenting him saying "I already know you're cute I don't need a photo. Let's talk later?"
I've been left on read for days so I don't expect to hear back.
He wanted a hookup and is dropping you
He's embarrassed
Other - please explain
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Please select your age
Updates
+1 y
So you think I should call him on the phone or is that desperate?
Updates
+1 y
Called once, no answer and he isn't gonna return it. I went to the supermarket on the usual day I go and he wasn't there. He's always there on that day so it seemed he purposely switched shifts to acoid me. Extreme... Oddly, a butcher who I have NEVER had a convo with saw me, then instantly was looking down to his department. Why do I keep attracting these weirdos?
Updates
+1 y
He was a shy f&$*boy by the way.
Shy guy embarrassed or ghosted by undercover f&$*boy?
I am a very shy guy myself and I got to admit that girls who are "too" straight forward intimidate me a bit. Maybe its the case here too and you already went too far. And his little misunderstanding with the picture made him even more insecure so he quit in panic
Also, my ex husband happened to go shopping there right after me. He never shops there so that was interesting. He was with my son because it was his afternoon who the guy already knows. I don't know if the guy saw them or not but it's highly improbable he didn't. He knows I'm divorced though. He is too.
Underestimated you. Hence why I'm not contacting he needs a different kknd of chick. Some girls who wear niqab do that type of thing and even sleep with dudes and everything. Perhaps he thought I was one of those...
A compliment 😀 well you are right. What you do now is your choice. Ignoring a girl or ghosting intentional or not in my experience leads to a pit of doom that only the strongest minded can get out of taking a lot of patience.
And of course because someone hasn't found me to their tastes. It's annoying because I hate cowardice. I've always had the decency to tell someone that I am not interested. And I do it bluntly. Not in a wishy washy way that leaves them with false hope. That's why ghosting irritates me. Not because the person isn't interested. That is their right and I wouldn't want someone to be with me if they weren't truly into me.
Well. I have so much followed this question I think it's very interesting but without knowing either one of you I don't know I would definitely love to see what you look like and then that way I could give you an answer and what I would do if I was him
Sounds like a lot of confusion going on. It amazes me with someone who has that severe of problems with English is working in a grocery store. That must make his job very difficult. But as for the messages, it sounds like he was offended that you weren't very happy about getting his picture. He most likely wanted one of you also.
I wear burqa too so I'm really insulted and it seems he talked about to his whole work which is messed up when he is the one acting dumb. But anyway guys will always support each other over a woman anyway.
This is nothing compared to the insanity I had to deal with right outside my house.
W'salaam, yes I do. I understand what you're saying about men not taking women seriously unless their family is involved. Thats a real shame that women can't show interest in a guy without being seen as easy though. I wish it wasn't like that.
Honestly, they are the one's losing out. And even if you look in the sunnah there is nothing blameworthy about it. Khadija radiya allaahu anha proposed so subhanallah. What's wrong with people. I am part to blame but I'm divorced with kids like he was so I decided to reciprocate.
Thats true, unfortunately muslim countries have evolved to run by a culture where women are always submissive and men are dominant. Even if that's not what the religion teaches.
That being said, there are other rules if you look at it Islamically, even though Khadija was the one to ask the prophet (pbuh), im sure they weren't alone at any point with out mehrum since thats against the rules. Although the prophet (pbuh) hadn't known about Islam at this point. I still don't think they were speaking alone, there were always other people around, until they had done a nikah
Noof course not. I eas never alone with him either. That was the whole reason for the ghosting. But Alhamdulillah.
The men are qiwwam over the women but they've been influenced a lot by the sexist European dominance attitude based in the Christian belief that Eve is responsible for getting she and Adam kicked out of the garden and that periods are a curse.
The Islamic view of men being above women is that they are the maintainers and protectera to help them achieve while maintaining their honour.
Anyhoo. I have way more fun and important things to do
I called he ignored. I thought Inwould give "shy" men the benefit of the doubt but they all pull this crap all the time. They beg for someone to make it easynon them then when one does the treat her like a leper. I'm not even looking but don't want to be that chick who brands all men as [insert pejorative sexual predator insult here] but they aren't giving me much to work with. I'm pretty sure he called in sick to work to avoid me since he knows the days I come in to do my shopping. Good Lord.
He isn't responsive at all over text. Takes days to reply. His coworker. said he was quiet and doesn't talk much. He is even. ore silent over text. Don't know if he's nervous or just was too shy to say he wasn't that interested. Simply curious and attracted.
If he were a bag boy, I wouldn't be so interested. He handles the fish and the way he dealt with my salmon and other orders shows me someone who is detailed and thorough.
Also, I see he will be the type to show me he cares instead of empty words.
I make him very nervous and for about 2 months he would shyly check me out. I like shys even though they are incredibly frustrating. And the shys like me so you have to deal with the hand your dealt. 🤷🏾♀️
Intelligence isn't always afforded opportunity. Public education is horrible in the country I'm in and a lot of very intelligent people don't get the opportunity to get degrees and all that.
The fact that he decided to learn a skill that he can take in other places shows pragmatism and survival skills. For the place I'm in, he's made the right choices.
Capable people who use their brain are highly attractive to me.
Also, he's attractive and cute and skinny and he has eyes like oceans.
His coworkers said good things about him. Also, I can see he has broken through his shyness to make it clear he's interested. He's willing to meet me half way.
I was with a highly educated man who was a big earner for many years. But, he didn't treat me well.
Good treatment and compatibility are what I value at this stage of the game. He has my interest and I get good vibes so I will explore until it's time to look elsewhere.
I have peace of mind. He's stopped communicating so he's lost interest. Shy or not shy. He was going out of his comfort zone for sure so to shut it down he's changed his mind. I have to see him eventually. I'll just be cordial.
I don't go fishing actually. Not actively looking. He said he wants to meet me. His coworker said he doesn't talk much but he is always chatty with me. Hard time decipehering nerves from disinterest/time wasting.
Yes, I was very shy with girls. Looking at it from the other side I bet a couple of girls I liked were really confused about me. One night I just made up my mind i was going to tell somebody how I felt about her. I half expected her to laugh at me but it actually went a lot better than I thought it would.
Most Helpful Opinions