Should I confront him?

[Anonymous]

So I remember blushing at this guy when talking to him, and afterwards he just kept glancing over at me. At some point, I had a crush on him, but not anymore and this is why. He later began to stand at a distance and would watch me for some period of time. He wouldn't stop even when I frowned back. It's fixated, like as I talk to my friends, as I eat or as I play on my phone, he'd just stand afar, watching me as I do things like I have no privacy. Sometimes when I notice this, I get up to walk away but he'd literally lean over and continue watching me. He's my age, but it's very intimidating, I completely hate it and just want this to stop.

[Carolus]

For what, admiring you? You haven’t indicated any abuse or disrespect on his part. You are bothered because you have feelings towards him but in denial - that’s why you keep noticing him looking at you, and am sure he would say the same, that you have also be checking him out, if you got balls than him, just go to and ask him what he wants and give him a chance if he wanna date, sometimes a small nudge is necessary for shy dudes.

[Asker]

I did try talking to him, he doesn't respond but he still doesn't stop this so now what are you gonna say?

He literally stands infront at a distance and watches me, and it is very hard to miss it, so I'm not 'noticing him' because I'm searching for it, you'd actually have to be blind as a bat to miss this.

Watching someone's every move without giving them space/privacy is NOT checking them out. Checking someone out is usually for a few seconds, whereas this behaviour can go for minutes at a time. I usually hide behind things to avoid it. You clearly haven't experienced this before, but this behaviour can be very intimidating and extremely uncomfortable.
You also mention "you haven't indicated any abuse or disrespect on his part". So consider this, if someone follows you (and they haven't abused or disrespected you in any way) is that seemingly alright?

[Carolus]

Then, ignore him. Continue with your life as if he doesn’t exist, change your schedule, where you sit, what you do etc. I guess you are in college, there is no much you can do other than reporting him to schools management which will create some negative attention to you from his friends and other students. There are things you have no control off especially on other people’s part. If ain’t college, then get a restraining order against him if he’s uncomfortably creepy.

[Asker]

Well thank you for finally understanding. It's not just staring for a few seconds, this is legit watching for a couple of minutes at a time continuously, I just don't understand how or why someone would want to do that. It's not something someone could ignore (I wish I could, but it's difficult) as being watched for more than a few seconds is extremely creepy. I usually hide behind things to avoid him, but I just feel weak doing so.
Since I used to have feelings for him, I'm in denial that he's practically stalking me. I just don't want to hate him, I literally just want his behaviour to stop. Should I politely ask him to stop?

[Carolus]

You can try and reach out to him, tell him you are uncomfortable and he should stop, either in person or send one of your friends, if he doesn’t stop, some institutions have guidance and counseling department, you can report him there if applicable or report him to the management. Or else hire someone to beat him up, if I was around, I could take that job 😁😁 and choke him a bit. On that last suggestion, It’s not me who have suggested 😂😂.

[Asker]

Yeah, I guess I should try telling him it's uncomfortable, hopefully it stop it. The reason I can't report him is because there is a possibility that he thinks it's just a secretive story going on between us, and he thinks I like it. So I'd have to tell him first.

LOL about the last idea

[Vikkrram]

So your basic problem is that now you don't have feelings for him , so if he stalk at you , you don't like and if you had feelings for him then it would be ok for you?

[Asker]

Not at all, you misunderstand.
I'm not saying that him looking at me is bad, if it is done only for a few seconds without making me uncomfortable. The problem here is that he watches me from a distance for like a whole minute, fixated, like I'm his property and he has every right and authority to do so as he pleases. This is not at all cool, this itself is the reason why I stopped liking him.

[Vikkrram]

Ok let's say if he makes a first moove and then talk wid you it would be ok for you? Or now all feelings have gone?

[Asker]

He won't make a move anymore, it was never his intention. His intention is to just stare at me

[Vikkrram]

You Never know that infact i have feelings for a girl she is younger than me and i know it's impossible to be together coz our society won't allow us to do. So i never show her that i have feelings for her (yeah sometimes some signs get slipped off as i am also a human being). But i try to ignore her , coz i ignore Awkward moment wid her.
Maybe she thinks that i don't like her but that's not the case. So u never know

[Asker]

Why won't society let you be together? How old is she?

[Vikkrram]

She is 19 and i am 24 ... and here in mine country you aren't allowed to have relationship wid younger one which is somehow morally sounds good. And she is my neighbour and i can't cross my lines as she is young but i am mature than so i have to keep control over my emotions.

I wish we could be together i swear i Never saw her wid bad intentions. But we can't be together... that i have to remind myself...

[Asker]

Why? 19 is above the legal age, why aren't you allowed? I pity you :(

[Vikkrram]

You won't understand Maam it's more of not a legal age it's more of a Culture things it's more of a moral values. In Mine society it's not acceptable so i have to keep it a secret and have to bear pain by keep a smiling face always as i can't told this to everyone.

[Asker]

You can tell me, your story sounds very sweet. So what is the age you can date someone?
The guy I am describing also comes from a very orthodox family, they have traditions and morals and they simply can't find a partner by themselves- it is viewed as immoral. They can only choose from someone their parents introduce. I'm wondering if that is the same situation with you.
I'm interested to know about ur story as it sounds sweet, you can tell me about it

[Vikkrram]

I can't tell you my story in public Maam if you will pm me then i can tell you mine...

[Asker]

Sure