Why is incel culture so hateful towards women?

Question

Like seriously having bad luck in finding a romantic relationship is one thing but these guys are really shooting themselves in the foot. How do they think being hateful and spiteful towards women will improve their chances of having a relationship? Seems counterproductive in my opinion. They cry about how no woman wants them yet treat women like trash. Are they really that stupid?

MCheetah · Accepted Answer

Why is feminist culture so hateful towards men?

Not all incels are the way you paint them; only the ones you'll see on incel boards are the "misogynist" types you assume all incels are. But as I said above, this isn't a male-only thing and women do this just as often towards men. Only difference is, hating men is socially acceptable nowadays, where as so much as politely criticizing female behavior is dismissed and labelled "incel culture" or "misogyny" or some other stupid BS to roll your eyes at and ignore. Another thing: You are the one assuming all incels are hateful and spiteful. You're projecting your view onto them, and assuming it's accurate. "They treat women like trash." How?

Anyway, here's the simple answer: When you do everything in your power to seek out love, companionship, and acceptance from someone, but get sh*t on for being too short, or too ugly, or overweight, or shy, or socially awkward, or insecure, or what have you, and it happens over, and over, and over, and over, and OVER again, you tend to get frustrated. At this point, modern men tend to split off into one of four directions:

A: They become desperate simps and chop off their balls to become subservient lap-dogs to women.
B: They become incels and their sexual frustration reaches a fever pitch.
C: They become MGTOW or close to it, deciding to quit chasing after women outright, since the odds are against them and it's a giant waste of time.
D: They learn how to rig the game and essentially become gym-obsessed assholes who treat women like sh*t and end up successful with women after transforming into Bad Boy Chads (and don't even try to deny women don't like men like this; I will ignore you like a Flat Earther)
E: Luck out.

Or, if you want that in simple terms: After being treated badly like women, men will either beg them for attention, become frustrated and bitter, decide to quit pursuing women altogether, Glow Up and get revenge on them by being an "asshole pussy-slayer," or just get lucky outside of their control.

The other four options no women pay attention to, notice, or care. They only notice the incel parts because those are the only ones not kissing women's asses or giving them attention. I'm option C, for what it's worth.

Women don't like to hear this, but the only reason they hate incels, and by extension, MGTOW (who are NOT incels or misogynists, by the way) is because these men aren't bathing women with attention or kissing their asses.

And that's what women desire most in men: attention. MGTOW are men who walk away from women, completely. By logic, women should love that they exist because it means they won't be asking these women out on dates, or reproducing. Yet, I can't tell you how many women rage at MGTOW men; the idea that men aren't going to give women attention because most women, in their eyes, suck and aren't worth it.

So yeah. The TL;DR is incels are just sexually frustrated. Women only give a damn about their existence because they dislike women. By extension, most men ignore and don't think about female incels' - feminists' - existence. Funny how that works out.

Bluemax · Accepted Answer

I wish there were two terms for incels, as I believe there are two types of them.

The first kind is what 90% of people think of when they use or hear that word. The loud misogynists who spend their days railing against the evils of all things feminine. I would agree they are shooting themselves in the foot.

And then there's the other type. The ones we don't hear from. They have jobs. They have friends. They are often thoughtful and kind. They are your neighbor. They are your friends. They are the bank teller you spoke with today. They are the grocery store clerk you chatted with. They're just ordinary people who haven't found someone to be with. They go quietly about their business every day.

If we only paid attention to the volume of noise, we might think the first kind are the most common, given that they are the loudest.

However, I think it's a mistake to believe they are the most numerous. I believe the latter VASTLY outnumber the former. We just don't know it because they don't make noise.

My brother was born with cerebral palsy. He's also quite intelligent and compassionate. For these reasons he counsels people with disabilities. A great many of them are disfigured by their conditions. Sadly, a great many of them are incels of the 2nd type I mentioned. Interestingly, almost half of them are women. I have sat in on his sessions and even contributed a little. He deals with them very compassionately. I wish the first type of incels could know my brother. He's rather effective at steering people away from anger.

I believe the second type far outnumbers the first because I have encountered them in real life. I have yet to encounter the first type in real life. Ever.

By the way, I also believe that for every one incel who turns a gun on someone else, there are *many* more who turn the gun on themselves. But nobody seems to care about that.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Women can have sex whoever they want. But not with them. Because of that they can not stand the fact that they are virgins but the others are having fun. They are butthurt and jealous. They say men who can have sex ‘’bad boys’’ 😂 which is quite funny. And they say women who can have sex freely ‘’slut’’ which is quite funny too. They do not hate the women, they hate ‘’themselves’’ they suppress their self hate by reflecting it to the women. They need help from a therapist

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Come on are you serious? You do the same damn thing. It is how it works. They are hurt people so that is all they can give. You cannot give what you haven't got. Whatever attitude you have toward yourself, that is the only thing you have to give to the world. It is an attitude problem. Stop looking at these guys like they have life figured out and are purposely failing and making mistakes. We are no better. No one is perfect. We all have our shit.

MrOracle · Answer

While I have  some  sympathy for a few of them - the guys who are incredibly socially awkward, often due to Aspergers or something similar - but the majority of them are guys who feel entitled to women but simply aren't willing to put in any work to get one - to change their own thinking and behavior so that they could attract a woman. They are angry and bitter, but while they may really have been born with a less-than-great hand of cards, they've done little or nothing to improve their own circumstances but still expect women to be attracted to them, and are angry when that doesn't turn out to be the case. I tell guys over and over that they have to put in the effort, and that they aren't entitled to anything, and need to earn it, but many of these guys grew up with parents that gave them everything and never told them "no", so when they don't get something in the real world, they don't know how to handle that and they get very upset and feel very entitled. As a guy who wasn't born beautiful myself, I know full well the work and effort it takes to attract women - AND how often you strike out - but that's the system and men have to learn to work it just as women do. The ones who won't make that effort don't get any results, and instead of taking responsibility for that, man of them blame women, which is mostly wrong.

LogicBomber · Answer

Women’s endless hate towards men has created a society of men tired of the endless female entitlement, childishness, false victim crap, drama, and shit tests most women are and do...
the word “incel” was a last ditch effort by these same women to shame and attack men for finally saying no to the bullshit.
It’s proof that pointing out actual verifiable truths about women doesn’t make women actually change how they act or even see that how they act is the problem, but as expected, it instead just makes them point the blame once again at men. Because taking accountability for themselves is just to much work.

Men don’t want to date women like this and therefore they are not “shooting themselves in the foot”... they are dodging a bullet.
But they do want to date decent women... unfortunately it is starting to be like hunting unicorns.
Women love to think they are the prize... but here’s the thing... Aside from vagina, name something you bring to the table that a man can’t get from buddies, family, or a dog?

You can choose to believe that men expecting more from you is “hate” all you want, but you will not find a man willing to put up with your shit until you (as a gender) generally stop acting like you are a gift we should be thankful for.

ODC2112 · Answer

Incels are people who are constantly being devalued for years, in a systematic way. Such devaluations create self-devaluing beliefs. Such self-devaluing beliefs are projected onto women, who initially devalued the subjects.

The incel lives in a reality that is not invented. It is simply exaggerated. The facts he presents are real. The resulting theory is an extreme extrapolation. This makes him much more aggressive because he touches the cause of his frustration every day and makes him practically impossible to redeem.

The thing in the future will get worse and worse, because male suffering is never taken into consideration, nor seriously, by a company that tells you that if you suffer you are a second-rate male and this amplifies the thing even more.

Unfortunately, this enters a vicious circle. From which it will be difficult to get out. This happens because an identity has been created that did not exist before and this identity. The identity of being despised by women, which is strengthened through mutual contempt.

Don't complain if they hate you, you created them.

TheFlak38 · Answer

Leave it to an ugly 30 year old woman with millions of options to lecture men about relationships and how finding a mate is based on luck and not on looks and social media. No incelibate man treats women in any way simply because they can't even get close to a woman. The sexual marketplace is rigged in your favour and society is catering to your vagina to such a grotesque point that even a man who is a 10 can't get a woman who is above 5. And don't pretend that you don't like the mere existence of Incels either. You love Incels, you need and society as a whole needs them to because it's these men who validate you on a daily basis and are willing to sacrifice their lives just to get a chance to ejaculate into your vagina.

normalice · Answer

The incel thing is just an attempt to redirect normal adolescent sexual frustrations against the Democratic party. Because the right has no policies to offer they rely on spite, division, and hate to motivate their voters. This is why incel culture is a hateful culture instead of a supportive one.

genericname85 · Answer

hate always comes from pain. i mean i don't know if you ever wanted something in your life so bad that this desire slowly transforms into bitterness and anger about not having it and then slowly shifting that emotion from "hating that you don't have it" to "hating it". cause longing and loving it brings you pain so that helps in a sense.

Guanfei · Answer

They're just the male equivalent of modern feminists. They got hate and rejection from one side, so they do the same in return.
I could have been like that, considering how women treated me. Even tho I didn't go that way, I kinda understand.
Of course, some are just hateful because they're gigantic retards, but I understand how it feels when no one look at you except to mock or insult you, and to never have anyone wanting you for anything else that being a tool, or a toy. I've felt the pain and the anger coming with it. Some just surrender to it and find in that hate what they need to fill the void of love they have in their lives. A bit like "Well that's fine because they're all bitches and I don't need them anyway!"
I'm not saying it's good, fair or even smart, in fact it's the complete opposite, but feelings can't be controlled.

Xtcy2083 · Answer

Yes, they really are that stupid. Unfortunately, there are many incels here on GaG.

D4nielv · Answer

It's not founded in reason, it's a coping mechanism. Don't try to find any logic behind it.  This video does a good job going into depth about it.

Chthou95 · Answer

Not all if it is. You just hear what the media says and go along with it like a sheep. But a lot of incels actually feel depressed and some have autism. They'll more than likely take the suicide route. But the incels you talk about that are mentally unstable people that are dangerous are in the rare minority. Sure back then you had a nasty forum of fucked up dudes saying sexist stuff. But now the forums are for men that are depressed or want support from other people and learning how to cope with their inefficiencies

Diodoro · Answer

Don't get me wrong. I don't feel for incels because in my opinion being an incentive is ultimately your choice because you're not putting in work.

That said, the implied nature of being an incel is that they're trying and consistently failing. So they're mad and gave up. I doubt any guy would self label as an incel if they were still out there trying lol

So saying they're shooting themselves in the foot is off, because they're not even in the game. They're no longer trying

Screamsgutter · Answer

Good luck finding a group of individuals (men or women, whatever racial minority, religion) that doesn't have extremists mixed in.

Usually those falling into these fringe groups of bigger groups exist in a constant cycle where - they hate, whoever they hate does/says something that perpetuates their hate, they let who they hate know they're being hated, whoever they hate responds with hateful comment back... and so on.

Levin · Answer

While obviously inceldom isn't exactly productive, and not something I condone.

Can't you see this argument in terms of working people who work hard, but barely have enough to get by, and then see people on job seeker's allowance, particularly those popping out kids, 'getting paid' more to sit on their arse all day?

Junior__ · Answer

I only ever see these guys online. I don't run into them offline. Just as well. They would do nothing but annoy me if I actually ran into to them. Too much whining. A real man takes his lumps and he moves on. He doesn't start hating all women. Boys do that. Men don't.

RedStiletto88 · Answer

They are nasty spiteful spoiled brats that think women should cater to their whims and become crybabies when they realize we have minds of our own.

Anonymous · Answer

IT'S NOT! SOME women just take it as that.
Also if you're 0 for lifetime with women. You really CAN'T hurt your chances with women. It's mathematically impossible 🤣( another thing SOME women fail to understand).
It's a double edged sword. First women reject a guy because he's not enough of whatever it is that they deem worthy. But then even if the ask women what he's doing wrong or how he may succeed. Women (at best) have no answer. And (at worst) blames him for it and hold him in contempt because to ask a woman is not being "a man" or "manly".
Eventually some these men realize the whole process is a rigged system that they cannot win. And decide to go their own way. Some retain the RIGHT to be bitter about.
Because we all know in most woman's eyes only women are allowed to be bitter about anything. It's the double standard women have.
You're welcome. Glad I could help clear that up for you. 🙂

TheLittleInnocent · Answer

Its easier to blame others for your problems than deal with them.

Leonharted · Answer

Incel is short for "Involuntary Celibate." They want to have sex, but are unable to, presumably because every single woman they try to pursue a relationship with denies them. This leads to feelings of sexual frustration.

Agape93 · Answer

It's easier than admitting their own failings and working hard to fix them

PoopyPoop · Answer

There are people who want to change the world and people who want the world to change for them. Most incels are in the latter category along with lots of feminists and BLM types.

MzAsh · Answer

There are many factors to consider but none of them are an excuse to treat all women like crap.

Lionman95 · Answer

They aren´t just bitter. They stopped looking for love because even if a woman would love they wouldn´t trust anyway. So I don´t think that they are looking for one.

SiberFox · Answer

Morals, they want to see good women preaching morality and dissuading other girls and women from having poor morals. Since so few women actually do this they get bitter and come to the conclusion that all women and immoral and thus worthless.

Ms_Vanderquack · Answer

That’s the defining characteristic of incels. Blaming women for their own inadequacies.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

I'm not sure what answer you're looking to get here. You're asking why an angry and counter-productive person is being counter-productive. They do it because that's who they are as people.

Anonymous · Answer

They don't want to do the work. It's sad lazy entitlement.  The world doesn't work like this - and when entitled whiny bitches get confronted by reality, they often get angry.

slatyb · Answer

They are massively insecure and can’t handle the truth: their own behavior is the problem.

Twalli · Answer

They don't think it matters how a man treats a woman. They see women choose objectively attractive men who don't treat them well over less attractive men who would. Therefore they (incorrectly) assume that it doesn't matter how you treat women.

BipBipLeddus · Answer

Some people are just shit. What can you do about it?

TexasRed95 · Answer

It's because they blame women for not having a relationship. I have never had one but I have never been of interest for a women. So clearly it's me and not them.

BillyBalls · Answer

Why are women so hateful towards men. You do know that women can be incels also? Are you an Incel?

bamesjond0069 · Answer

About the same as all the women crying about fuckboys. 😂 but yeah they all just have a terrible attitude and nobody wants to deal with their shit basically i think.

dvc0006 · Answer

if all you get is hate, you have nothing but the same to offer in return. Women hate incels that is why they are incels , and that is their frustration and it compounds over time.

Wowboi · Answer

Well women has does the same for centuries. It's only right for them to get fed up with bitches. You should never take offence unless you class yourself as a bitch lol let the "incels" be and focus on yourself I'd say

Tomtom9494 · Answer

Because women don’t want those men so they view women negatively because of how women treated them negatively.

Caunsos · Answer

They feel women and sex are rights granted to them and by women rejecting them by are committing crimes.

Anonymous · Answer

Same reason feminist culture is so hateful toward men. And let's face it, feminism came first, and incel/mgtow culture was just a response to it.

emperor90 · Answer

Men feel women are objects but they are not intrested

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Because they believe women are only interested in chads and they believe that’s too shallow

IHateBeingaMan · Answer

because they feel men need to work harder to attract women than the other way around

notwoke · Answer

They just really don't want a relationship with a westernized woman who has had her mind poisoned

CuriousMufuxka · Answer

It's likely that they would be shitty dads anyway. Probably would pay child support though.

Anonymous · Answer

Rejection and being ignored can transform a guy into a misogynist.

blueazure · Answer

Maybe they are stupid. It seems like they acting like they are the victims but actually not. Kinda... Like that...

TsAubreyKate · Answer

Well women want the guys that treat them like trash

Slim57 · Answer

Because both men and women are hateful to them, for no reason

QuietRunner · Answer

anger causes many things anger usually causes people to turn to the dark side

Blaine999 · Answer

Stupid and pathetic, nothing beneficial will ever come of it

scentoflavender · Answer

Broken people do broken things.

Anonymous · Answer

I dont like incel culture neither do i support 3rd wave feminism

bgreek · Answer

Blame the Feminist babes

msc545 · Answer

Women treat incels like shit.

Hanrej · Answer

Worked for the feminists though, didn't it?

PeterSmith1983 · Answer

Not an excuse but they are frustrated

OddBeMe · Answer

Every hate group has a focal point.

JohnK123 · Answer

That’s what girls do…

In_Trance · Answer

That's the entire basis of it

Tstrbrainer · Answer

Basically we are straight guys, so that's why

Why is incel culture so hateful towards women?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why is incel culture so hateful towards women?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.