Is this a trashy thing of me to do?

[Anonymous]

So, whenever I meet a woman whether it be an online dating app like Tinder or Bumble, a bookstore, the mall, a party, a club, at a park, or any of the myriad of places I’ve met women at try to have sex with them as soon as possible.

This is after whatever formalities that must be done are had

I make it a deliberate point to have sex with all of these women as one of the first things.

Now, why?
Well, it’s just to ensure that if I learn stuff about her in the near future that I don’t like and decide to leave her that I didn’t waste my time and got nothing out of the interaction.

I never lie to these women about anything.

But, I don’t like the idea of being with a woman for awhile and figuring out things about her you don’t like and that you find yourself leaving her because of.

I don’t like wasting time in this regard.

If I have to risk wasting time, then I want something in return so I don’t feel like a complete idiot.


Also, as a test and mental note. If I’m able to have sex with a woman very fast, it summons up all sorts of assumptions, thoughts, etc.

[AviatorTom]

Though I can't explicitly approve of your technique, I can understand where you're coming from. After my divorce, when I started dating, I dated a beautiful woman that I was very attracted to. I decided to take things slowly, because I thought it was the right thing to do. After our third date, she invoked her "three-dates" rule and told me that she was feeling no chemistry between us and broke up with me; it was too late to convince her that I did find her attractive and was just taking things slow.

I didn't make the same mistake on the next woman I dated. We didn't have sex right away, but I didn't take things slowly, and we had a very nice 3 months of dating, including sex, before it ended... for other reasons.

[OlderAndWiser]

I understand younger men having that attitude. But when you get older and you are wanting to settle down into a long term relationship, how will you feel if your prospective partner asks you about your body count?

[LilyoftheLake]

Yep, a bit trashy. Just following base instincts - not evil, but low-level and a bit subhuman.

It sounds a bit harsh, so I'll explain: That's exactly what most of the animal kingdom does, with the exception of humans due to compassion for the "gentler sex." So it's lacking that compassion that is natural to the human race, resorting to the more base instincts of the mammalian kingdom.

[melanieeeB]

Yeah, your first intention is to get sex from her. As if it's the most important thing ever.
I would never ever continue dating someone like you or wasting my time like that.

Dating should be about getting to know someone as a person and not seeing if you like the sex first and afterwards try to see if you like their personality.

[Asker]

Well, I don’t make it obvious that it’s the only thing or most important thing I want from a woman.

Every single time this has happened, it’s appeared natural.

It really isn’t the most important thing though.

But imagine paying for a woman and then figuring it out later on that there’s things she’s been keeping from you.

That’s if she even decides to tell you.

I’m I just feel played

[melanieeeB]

Sure but isn't it more about personal stuff and like secrets she is keeping, I don't get the connection from that to sex...

[SaoirseS]

As the saying goes, if you have to ask the question then you already know the answer.

[Asker]

Well, I actually don’t.

Another way to think about it is, if you ask a question maybe you legitimately want to know the answer to it because you’re unsure.

[nachosaresexy]

Don't overthink it. You're in perma rutting season. Other animals around you know what's up. Why let human complexities get in the way.

[Jamie05rhs]

I'd say that about 60-70% of all guys are like this. So it's certainly not uncommon. It's definitely mainstream.
I still vehemently disagree with it, though.


(And the answer to your question is Yes.)

[FinalFantasyBro]

Does these women mind if yes than yes it wrong if not than they maybe is interested in having sex to

[Smashingdoozy]

Men really are just homoerotic lmfao.

[Smashingdoozy]

Homoromantic*

[Asker]

Why do you say this?

[Smashingdoozy]

You're not emotionally attracted to women. You just want to fuck women. You see women as just a pleasure box for you. Makes sense as to why you also think men and women can't be friends. You're emotionally attracted to men. You want to spend time with men.

[Asker]

I am 1000% emotionally attracted to women.

Maybe too much

[Smashingdoozy]

Your thoughts and actions speak otherwise

[Asker]

I really don’t see how they do though.

This is definitely a subjective thing from your perspective.

I don’t see how men and women can be strictly friends.
Why? Well, I can give a biological explanation AND show you how it doesn’t work in real-world interactions.

Why would be friends with a woman if I can be more?

This is pretty much the male’s biological thought process for centuries upon centuries of our evolutionary history.

Everything else I can’t see how you would think how you think since you haven’t explained even once

[Jamie05rhs]

@Smashingdoozy does have a point.

[Smashingdoozy]

You can give me an explanation that makes sense to you because that is how you feel. You do not view women as equals. Therefore you are incapable of having a mutual friendship. To you women are just for your pleasure, sure you may like spending time with someone you are dating but it's only because you are getting laid. Would you date someone without a sexual relationship or very minimal sexual contact?

Men who do view women as equals think your explainations are absolutely ridiculous.

[NathanDavis]

lmfao...

now your socials and the posts you pic make more sense...

all you follow and post are men...

men in gear, men working out, men holding big guns, men holding big knives... men grapping each other, sweaty men,

even when you post or look up women, they're all seem bigger and taller, and muscular AF... and doing things that are "very masculine"

I used to think you just liked to post homoerotic content on your socials, but it might be just you being a homoromantic individual, also makes sense to me

[Smashingdoozy]

@NathanDavis right it all just makes so much more sense!

[NathanDavis]

yep, and career choices... going from the military guard, to being a cop, which would be almost sure that 90% of your time you will spend it with, around, surrounded, under and below other, mostly men... for years to come, having your "bro" watching your back the whole time, lol

[Asker]

Damn…

Maybe you all may be right haha

[NathanDavis]

hopefully, you use protection

[Asker]

Protection?

Sorry, don’t know her pal

[NathanDavis]

yes, condoms... lol

[Subarugirl]

By definition it makes you an easy slut…

[Asker]

Hmm

I don’t think so

[Subarugirl]

You have sex with a bunch of people first thing as long as they let you…. I mean…

[Asker]

You clearly didn’t read anything I wrote above did you.

Go back and read it

[Subarugirl]

I did…
“whenever I meet a woman…. I try to have sex with them as soon as possible. “ …. Apparently because you don’t want to “waste time”

[AFretiredTXn]

Yes.