Why don't I get hit on in real if guys over the internet tell me I'm pretty?

[Anonymous]

I meet people online a lot and every time I send a pic, I get guys telling me I am pretty. And I think they do mean it. But in real life, I rarely ever get hit on. Nobody compliments me 95% of the time.

[abc3643]

This sounds like another case of Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2.

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If you Google "Beautiful Girl Syndrome", that's basically saying that beautiful girls can be bitchier and high maintenance because guys are willing to put up with more because she is so beautiful. Guys won't put up with so much shit and work if the girl isn't so attractive.

"Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2" is a phrase I coined, but it's a real thing I discovered about 40 years ago. This will take some time to explain...

All guys need to feel that they can "win". They view things as something like a competition in which there is some goal that they want to achieve. If a guy wants something and he believes that there is SOME possibility that he may get it, he will get emotionally involved. If he begins to believe that he won't get that, then he begins to withdraw and get emotionally detached. However, sometimes a guy doesn't even think he has a chance, so he doesn't bother...

And this is where "Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2" comes in. If a girl is really beautiful, a regular guy thinks:
1. There are a zillion other guys who want her.
2. She almost certainly already has a boyfriend.
3. There is no way she'd be attracted to me; I am not anything special.
4. If she did date me, she'd dump me for some better-looking guy who will hit on her and there definitely will be such a guy.
5. She's going to be bitchy and high-maintenance. (In other words, he thinks she suffers from normal Beautiful Girl Syndrome.)

So, he basically thinks that
1) he doesn't have a chance to get her,
2) if he did, he'll lose her, and
3) she's going to be a lot of work.

Because oceans of guys think like this - the only exception being the hunky guys - the beautiful girl either can't find a guy or goes with dickhead hunky guys (who suffer from Beautiful Guy Syndrome). Of course, the regular guys see the beauties with the hunky guys and that just reinforces their belief that they don't have a chance...

Oh, and one more thing: Since beautiful girls can get guys, they are getting laid... So, any new boyfriend has to "compete" against all of her past lovers and many guys don't think they are going to "measure up" (if you know what I mean) compared to those past hunky guys.

So, a beautiful girl needs to be proactive and hit on men instead of waiting for them to hit on her. A beautiful girl being proactive removes doubts males have regarding Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2.

[abc3643]

Show us a picture and we can then tell you if Beautiful Girl Syndrome Type 2 is applicable.

[Jdjfjcjj]

Probably for the same reason that guys will slide into a fat woman's DMs but wouldn't dare be seen with her in public. For sex dear.

[Asker]

i never had sex with them and i told them that

[Anonymous]

Are these candid random selfies? Or are there angles, filters, etc? I highly doubt you’d send a pick looking your worst, you’d want them to judge you off looking your best. So when they see that in pictures, it’s different than in person when you put a face to the pics. Maybe guys irl aren’t getting the same vibe. But at the same time guys can be weird about approaching women, so who knows what the ultimate reason is.

[Guy13]

No picture?