First he wanted to go out, then he rejected me. Why?

[Anonymous]

Guys' opinion is welcome.. At first he pursued me, flirted, I reciprocated and he suggested to go out. I said yes but he never made plans. Then he started playing games, when I ignored his message once he said 'you never liked me'. When he was transferring money to me he said it was 'for coffee'. I thought he was just playing me so I started treating him like he doesn't exist. He tried to talk to me and stared A LOT then but I ignored him. Then on social media he would post 'don't trust people who don't reply' or 'people don't know what they have until they lose it'. I thought it may've been directed to me. After holidays when there was no contact between us I decided to ask him out. He didn't reply but he started staring again and wanted my attention. We started talking again. He messaged me for weeks, was flirty in messages, sent me hearts and hugs, always texted first and a lot but avoided me irl. He stopped initiating physical contact though (at first he was also physical). He would kind of avoid me or run away from me, avoided eye contact too. He honestly seemed frightened of me. Recently he suggested that we meet but with my friend invited too (he didn't flirt with her but me all that time). I confronted him, asked if he's even interested, added that I don't like texting, told him either we hang out or to leave me alone. He said he was sorry for not organizing a meeting and said he wants to continue our relationship, and said I shouldn't be negative and overreact and that I can always tell him anything I want face to face. I replied to tell me when he's free. No response but he still wanted to talk to me in person. In total I asked him out like FOUR times already. Now he ignores me. Doesn't text anymore but is very nice in person. What's going on? Why is he doing this to me? At first he chased me a lot and now it's like a different person.

He doesn't want me anymore and is just playing around

He's too nervous to go out with me/inexperienced

He was never interested

[strateguy632]

the question confused me because "staring" means you met face to face? so he "did go out"? in the end "now he ignores you" he lost interest and maybe misinterpreted when you did not reply but move on because he showed not interested. maybe he feels angry at you but just think he misunderstood you and look for another person.

[Asker]

Yes, we know each other in real life (acquaintances) but we didn't go out with each other.

[USMC-Crossroads]

He gets satisfaction from feeling like he could be with you if he wanted to. True or not, once he thinks he can, that provides him a sense of accomplishment without requiring any work from him - it also eliminates the possibility of you rejecting him. He is using you as an ego boost. My guess is, he will grow up someday and regret not taking your relationship seriously.

[Gingerbread_GB]

Sounds like he's afraid to commit to a relationship. If you are looking for a stable relationship, I would suggest stay away from him.

[Anonymous]

Why are you texting so much. Talk to him.

[Asker]

So should I maybe ask him out in person? I don't want to make a fool of myself anymore because in texts he just didn't reply to being asked out. It would be like the 5th time. I don't know what to do.