Is it possible for a guy to like you and choose someone else?

[Anonymous]

I started a new job right after graduating college. When I first met one of my male coworkers I was developed a crush on him. He was welcoming and very kind. There were some things he did that made me believe he was interested, but nothing would come from it. He openly stated he was single in conversation with another co-worker that we share the space with and complained about it the whole first month I started working there. He would compliment my outfits and my hair, and once said he liked the way my hair framed my face. He complimented other female co-workers so I wasn’t sure if this was just the way he was. When we were in conversation with other co-workers he would watch for my reaction and often agreed with what I would say. He always seemed interested in what I had to say. After some time he talked about going on a date with a friend. For the next couple months he went back and forth about just being friends or “talking”. I kind of backed away at this time. One day we went together to pick up the drink order for our department meeting and we took his car. He seemed somewhat awkward/nervous at times. He mentioned something in reference to the girl he went on a date with and when I asked about her, he said they were just friends and smiled at me. Fast forward a month later I find out he’s now in a relationship with her. He no longer works at the job but gave everyone a personalized card on his last day. He said nice words and left his number to keep in touch. We talk occasionally but I maintain a platonic conversation out of respect for his relationship. I always wonder if there was ever anything there or if I was reading way too much into things

[teamvic]

I meann yeah I think it is possible but only if he liked the other girl more

For example there's this girl, she's been my friend for a while and then there was this other girl I met. Now I always liked the first girl and I thought she was perfect for me. But then when I met the other girl I started to like her. I stopped thinking about the first girl first. But in the back of my mind I always knew if the first girl started showing signs of her liking me or rather, her being available, I dont know what i would do because as I said I thought she was perfect.

But with all this being said. I can't say forsure that he did in fact like you. Not because I don't know but rather because he didn't show enough signs of that being the case. That compliment and the staring or whatever are signs to you that could be him showing interest. Right. But let's for the sake of this conversation, let's say we turned those signs to him just being friendly. Could you then still say he liked you?

I mean maybe he did like you but he ended up with her first. But at the same time. Maybe he didn't. As I said it's not enough to go off of to give you a definitive answer. All I know is he chose her at the end of the day🤔

[Asker]

This is an interesting perspective because I would always go back and forth on whether he was being friendly or not. The girl he’s now with he has known and been friends with for 7 years. He said he knew she liked him even when he had broken up with his girlfriend of 4 years after college.

[teamvic]

Ahh see she has time over you, if he did like you. Maybe he finally decided to give her a chance

[Lokiion]

Yeah it is possible and really isn’t uncommon