Guys, Just a friendly coworker?

[Anonymous]

He says we can't date cause we work together, which I was fine with. However I feel like his words and his actions are at odds. He always helps me out at work (I'm new-ish). Literally every assignment I have gotten in the past few months, he has checked on me and helped me. He helps me even outside work. He always keeps in touch, always tells me where he is and what he's doing. He complains about certain aspects of our 'relationship' like if I only talk to him about work or if I ask him to hangout and he's busy then I do what I had asked about on my own, like maybe going for a movie. He wants to be the one to plan hangouts, which he rarely does unless I stress him about it, but when he does, he'll take me to a really nice place. I'm confused. Is he just my coworker? Should I cut him off since he's throwing mixed signals? Should I hang in there? Help!

[DoggyDude]

I agree he's really throwing out such mixed signals. I am suspect about him claiming "you can't date because you work together", putting that statement together with his actions sort of suggests he's trying to get with you without any kind of commitment (even as 'dating') which doesn't lend well towards what you describe.

Ask yourself how you feel about this guy? if your feelings are not set, meaning its a 'take it or leave it' (call this Plan A) just forget about him and date other guys (if he continues to try to ingraciate himself like you described, just don't accept his offers, and politely turn down his offers to help you with work, saying "I need to learn this for myself, thanks", be polite of course and thank him for offering to help with sincerity).

If you already are finding him dishy and wonder what might be... Then, don't date other guys and next time you two hang out together, let him know you like him in a more serious way and that you've found you have a hard decision, either he's willing to become your boyfriend (e. g. your officially dating) or he's not and you need to take time for other people. If he's worth it, he will respond favourably, if he's on the fence he will ask for some time to consider things, and if he's a creep he will make it all about him and how compilcated dating you would be and try to make you feel bad for asking (obviously if he's a creep, follow plan A).

[Asker]

Thank you

[Confucious900]

Then simply just be friends. doesn't help you try to avoid him. since you work together. And fact that he helped you can be interpreted in many ways. Question is how do you feel? Do you want more or are you happy with just being friends.

I feel there is more to your story, but only time will tell. Right now he could just be friends and is being friendly or is moving very slowly to get to you.

[Iron_Man]

He already said you can’t date don’t accept his help anymore

[Asker]

Thanks

[Avicenna]

You need clarification, but are you really comfortable dating a co-worker?

[In_Trance]

Cut him off