The Perfect Guy

[Anonymous]

ok so this is just for fun this dude obviously doesn't exist and never will exist so these aren't requirement guys have to meet other than 2 or 3 of them.so dont be going your standards are too high or specific and crap because i can make this dude fucking fly and have laser beam farts if I want .i will be making this list from a little spell me and my best friend did after seeing a movie when we were like 12. the idea of the spell was on a full moon and slightly windy night to grind up flower petals and a couple of other plants right a list of things he /she should be and light it all on fire and toss it to the wind really dumb i know but it was fun and pretend but I will use what I remember of that list.

1. DOG. loves my dog this is not a compromise he must get along with my dog its like the number one thing.

2. Homestead. i want to live on a homestead so that means making my own oil i,leather, soap,flour, hay, milk, eggs, veggies even making my own chocolate and vanilla even going to have a well for water and solar panels for power meaning if you can't handle it better get running.

3. Kids. i want to have kids so he can't be abusive to kids and have at least kinda the same morals i have for raising kids

4. Voice. i can't stand a high pitched voice it literally hurts my ears. I want to kill my cousin if I dont have my coffee yet because he gets in my face full volume and he has not hit puberty so his voice is like nails on a chalk board. I like a voice with a little bass to it you know a little low

5. Singing. i love it when he will sing with me no matter what the song is and not carrying if he sounds like shit

6. Goof. likes to have fun be a little goofy just you know play has something funny to say.can laugh if he falls or I fall or something.

7. Hight. im not saying freakishly tall just you know a little taller than me I don't know what it is but I like to be a little taller than me

8. Drugs. no drugs got that i don't want Ecstasy.Benzodiazepines. ...Methadone. Amphetamines. ...Cocaine. ...Bath Salts. ...Methamphetamine.got that none if your and addict i want nothing to do with you its fine if you are recovered or something but if you take drugs get out

9. Jabs. i like to play fight so if you give me a few bruises from it im cool with it i don't care if you get a little rough about it but if you're going to beat me for the hell of it and be a wife beater get the fuck out now

10. Financing. I don't care if he's rich hell he can have 50 cents to his name I don't care but yah better be smart about it not like my cousin where he has a car payment and has the cash for it but then gose and blows it on a boat he didn't need it.or knows how to put towards his future.

11. Dark hair, green eyes or 2 tones. i think dark hair and green eyes are hot majorly stunning am i saying yu have to be like that no but you should have a hair cut that matches your facial structure which most men don't I don't even mind 2 tone hair but come on you can't tell me the black hair and green eyes is not stunning.

12. Clothes. change his style from time to time like i do maybe one day he wants to wear his PJs and the next he wants to dress up a bit

13. Childish. im like a kid so i like to build pillow forts or watch a Disney marathon or cartoons I watched at 8 so if you do that your epic

14. Smart. im not saying you need to be the next Einstein but some basic knowledge would be great. i mean its ok if your bad at something i mean as you can see im shit at spelling and grammar.

15. Body type. not necessarily hard core muscle but not fat either kinda like this

ps don't know why but a V line is sexy

16. Organised. im not saying you need to be as organized as i am but not leaving the house trashed would be great.

17. Sexually. I don't think this needs to be explained

18. Hygiene. look yah brush your teeth and hair you clean under your nails and take a shower and try to smell pleasant is it that hard?

19. White. this is going to piss people off am I saying I would date outside my race no stranger things have happened but I happened to find white men more attractive to me.its a preference nothing more.

[clampfan101]

Laser beam farts? lmao

DOG
I love big dogs very much, but not so much for the miniaturized breeds.

Homestead
Never...

Kids
I love kids and want my own. I think I would be good at raising with my wife's help.

Voice
It's certainly not high pitched. I'm pretty quiet due to shyness, but working on becoming easier to hear.

Singing
I feel stupid trying to sing in the shower. lol I sing in church sometimes, though.

Goof
I'm not goofy, but seem to have a good sense of humor.

Hight
It's been awhile since I checked, but I'm at least 5'8". (173cm)

Drugs
I absolutely never have or will do drugs or drink.

Jabs
I'm extremely gentle.

Financing
I can't have a job until my epilepsy gets better...

Dark hair, green eyes or 2 tones
You can easily see my hair color. My eyes are blue-hazel.

Clothes
I have no sense of style. I just wear jeans and a comfortable shirt.

Childish
I don't do anything like pillow forts, but like Disney and/or Pixar movies and old school Disney shows.

Smart
My memory isn't so great, but I'm good at grammar and usually spelling and math. I love learning about things like science, technology, mythology, and once and awhile history.

Body type
Last I checked, 172 lbs...

Organized
I'm typically not very organized, but can be if I want or need to.

Sexually
I'm still virgin. Waiting for marriage.

Hygiene
I admit this isn't my strong suit...

White
Yep. I was born in America,(California, I think.)

[clampfan101]

I seem good for about 70% of these.

[myTake Owner]

You felt the need to tell me that? Also what be your point I'm a virgin. Also these were not real expectations so none need to match them

[clampfan101]

I thought you might like a response to all of them.

[myTake Owner]

im not mad or anything just wondered was all

[juststrollin]

This is the best Mytake I've read, great job!
This is a perfect guy~ I now want to think of what my perfect guy would bexD
Everyone has a perfect type, and its better you know so you dont accept a rando, I accepted a rando once because he looked liek the perfect guy but inside, woooh there isn't enough looks or childhood dreams in the world to make up for that gross character of his :P

[myTake Owner]

i get to image a lot because ill be alone my whole life lol

[juststrollin]

No one really needs any romantic relationships and they aren't all faireytales, unfortunately. But the great thing is that you know the internal qualities you look for in a man. This is what will get you will be closer to finding him without accepting so much mediocrity from other men... Never forget those core things (organized, caring, etc) and make sure no matter how they look, you are sure those are the qaulities. Honesty is imperative , and if you feel bad than leave it. Be your best you and remember men are accessories, not the main thing in life

[OlderAndWiser]

Have you ever actually dated? What is your experience with the extent to which guys meet these criteria?

[myTake Owner]

Again not real expectations dumb spell when I was 9

[OlderAndWiser]

So why do you need to talk about this now? You are becoming a young woman and you are talking about a child's fantasies. That is why you are getting some angry, disapproving responses.

[myTake Owner]

Because I was board and had nothing better to do at the time. You honestly think I give a flying rat shit what color his hair is or if he has abs or not because I don't

[OlderAndWiser]

"i think dark hair and green eyes are hot majorly stunning am i saying yu have to be like that no but you should have a hair cut that matches your facial structure which most men don't I don't even mind 2 tone hair but come on you can't tell me the black hair and green eyes is not stunning." No, after reading this, I honestly did not know that you don't give a rat's ass about his hair color.

[myTake Owner]

Again list from 9 years old 9 and 17 is a vary large age gap. What I want from a partner now is nothing because I will not have one

[OlderAndWiser]

Okay! Please proceed!

[myTake Owner]

With what?

[OlderAndWiser]

Proceed with not having a partner. Proceed with talking about fantasies that you had when you were 9 years old. Whatever.

[myTake Owner]

again I did it because at the time I had nothing better to do. I don't need a partner I already cook and clean up after 4 boys

[soul1112]

I think it's actually somewhat brave that you're not afraid to just state these things. People make it seem as it's wrong to even dream about it. I don't even think you're asking for too much. These things feel like second nature to me (most of them).

[soul1112]

I also happen to think being a "goof" is actually kind of lame. You don't want a guy like that. You can not-serious and still have a decent sense of humour, in the sense that you don't take everything seriously. I find approaching a girl with humour is the cheapest approach.

[myTake Owner]

When I say goofy I don't mean take everything as a joke

[soul1112]

I didn't think that. I understood it as a "funny guy".

[myTake Owner]

Yah but somone who is I'm Sirius all the time is no fun

[Anonymous]

All this showed me is that women have crazy high expectations. No man posses all those. Hell I would say most men don't have half of those. If they say they do they are lying to impress.
This is honestly why I think the dating scene is so shitty now. Way to many women with crazy high expectations for any guy they will date. When they have pretty much next to nothing to offer themselves.

[myTake Owner]

I litterly said these were not real expectations they were spell me and my bffs did when we were nine if you think my list is bad you should have seen her brothers. and I don't date because I know I'll be alone unless I intend to fake My whole life and be whoever he wants which I can do I have had the same perfect child mask on sence I was born

[Browneye57]

TLDR - but it's plain to see we have another special snowflake with entitlement mentality living in a totally fake dreamworld of disney fantasy, puppy dogs, rainbows, and pink unicorns. :)

Wake up and smell the coffee honey. LOL

[myTake Owner]

i sware people never read the first part literally says these are not my real exceptions this is a list from a spell i did when i was 9

[Browneye57]

That would be 'swear'. You can't spell either. LOL

I see. So the dreams of a nine year old girl are worth expounding on when she's seventeen in an adult forum on girls and guys relationships. Got it. :)

[Browneye57]

Now go back and do your homework and tell the world what you have developed within yourself that brings high value to a relationship. What makes you the catch of a lifetime. What makes any guy lay his life down for you. What will you DO for your man! Cuz a high-value guy will expect it. So if you want to land the guy of your dreams tell us why you'll be the girl of his dreams.

[myTake Owner]

first off I already said im bad at spelling and grammar so is my dad. Second I said he is an imaginary guy meaning he does not and never will exist. Third I never said I wanted a guy this was just a dumb list I made because I felt like it. Fourth I had every intention of living alone I don't need anyone to take care of me you think I can't feed the hogs and round the cows, I can do everything I need by myself. I never said there was anything great about me I never said I was anything special

[Browneye57]

Destined for loneliness then. Got it. Hope you like cats. :)

[myTake Owner]

no im going to live alone on a homestead with chickens cows pigs goats sheep etc. im not likely to have to may cats because I don't like to clean litter boxes unless its a fixed barn cat or something. im not lonely im used to being alone beside if I want someone to bitch moan and demand i cook for him i got a cousin for that

[Franitz]

1,4,6,7,10,14,17,20. That's what I've got. About the children thing it's a gray area. I don't mind dating a woman that already got a young child, like 3 to 5 years old. But I wouldn't want to make one and go through all the effort of raising one from birth and tacking care of tthem.

[myTake Owner]

20? I never said my own kids

[Franitz]

Whoops I meant 19.

[myTake Owner]

Ok was like this only went to 19 what he be talking about

[Franitz]

Top 20 are more common than top 19 that's why got confused lol

[myTake Owner]

Tell the truth it would have been longer but I had to redo it 4 times and this last time I dident give a shit because my cousin gave me his fucking cold so I have a stuffy nose my ears hurt my head is pounding and every move I make is like dragging a 50 pound dumbbell

[Franitz]

I feel ya. Never had a mild cold.

[myTake Owner]

Yah but when I get sick it's bad because I'm like my dad I make whatever u gave me and make it worse like my cousin only had a stuffy nose but my body turned it into a pounding head stuffy nose and 2 ear aches then my other cousin has the one I mutated. My cousins convinced I'm weapon for the next war

[Mossbeard]

I'm like, kind of close lol. I can't sing but I can hum and whistle, I don't have green eyes but dark brown, and I could definitely be a bit more organized, but I guess I qualify in the other categories lol. What do I win for being 85% of your perfect guy? Pretty sure a B is still passing

[Mossbeard]

lmao I like how most of the dudes commenting did exactly what I did and compared how they stack up against your perfect guy.

[myTake Owner]

I'm wondering why you guys are comparing yourself. I never said you had to be good singer you can sound like a drowning cat and I wouldn't care.

[Mossbeard]

Because we're competitive lol we want to be the best, to be the first choice. We just compare what we have to what everyone else has and see who is better. It's one of those weird things we just do for no real reason other than that.

[myTake Owner]

Why do you want to be the first choice not like it's a compilation

[ATuairiscean]

Fair play you put a lot of thought into this - I am the opposite taking a "Who knows I might be pleasantly surprised" approach, everyone has their own way of doing things.

[myTake Owner]

Not real expectations

[sawno]

I met around 80% of these, glad i am at least mostly appealing.

[myTake Owner]

Lol what I want dose not apply to all women dude

[didigo182]

This Week: Body type. not necessarily hard core muscle but not fat

Next Week: Cruel and unfair world... we women suffer through a dictatorship of beauty...

[myTake Owner]

Again list I made when I was 9 to use in a spell 2 I don't really give a shit nobody forces me to walk in heels that's done of my own free will. and the muscle thing has more to do with working with animals you have to have at least a little muscle if your going to be shoving cows around. I mean I'm not hugely strong but I can carry a 50 pound bag of dog food and 20 pounds of cat food in one arm while caring milk and cat litter in the other up 22 stairs.

[didigo182]

I agree with most in this list, nobody have to be with a person who don't take care of hinself or is a Drug Addicted. My criticism is not related to that specific topic but the idea of the women (ALL of them) want someday get the perfect man, the prince riding his white horse that appears to save her (a poor Princess) from this cruel world. Because of this we see increasingly dissatisfied women and divorces high rates. Nobody is perfect (no matter who).

[myTake Owner]

I don't need a white night to save me I can save my own ass thank you vary much I don't like people's help

[J-Rock]

Damn... the perfect guy doesn't have a single quality that isn't shallow.

Meh, life goes on.

[myTake Owner]

Key words for you perfect not real

[J-Rock]

A benchmark of perfect sounds like a cheating, dishonest, douche.

[myTake Owner]

The idea of perfect is they don't do that and he was litterly a dream dude if I had to put must be things it be like my dog. Wants to live on homestead. No drugs including cigs or chew. healthy I don't care if he's chubby or has some problems just not be like My older cousin who is300 pounds working on a early grave. manners not being abusive or being extremely argent

[myTake Owner]

And be loyal

[J-Rock]

It's just there was a ton of stuff that has abolutely no effect on the quality of your life with that perfect partner.
Height will save you $20 because you don't need a stood, V-cuts, eyes, childish, clothes, voice (really?) etc.

It's a downward spiral for girls who value so much shallow stuff and then they are upset because the relationships with guys they choose are awful. If I was to draw out a perfect person for me then there would be physical attributes as well but it wouldn't be pretty much ONLY that. Of course my roles models were not kim kardashian and Justin Bieber.

Loyalty, emotionally supportive, sensitive, caring, honest, empathy, compromising, companionship, independent, and dominant are qualities that actually make a difference in how good.

[myTake Owner]

Like I said he is not my real requirements he is just somone in a dream I had the other night

[Dog19]

Would you date a guy who cross dresses, wears wigs, skirts, pretends to be a woman and is a internet hacker who has a million dollars?

[myTake Owner]

i dont care about his money. it be a bit uncomfortable why?

[anewgirl]

You're entitled to your preferences and opinions! 👍 Who cares what others say? I hope you find him!

[dude64bro]

Hell, I'd go gay for a guy like this. Women aren't worth the trouble 😂😜

[myTake Owner]

you would go gay for a guy like that? why? if your trying to mock me i said it was a list i made when i was nine dude

[Armourdillo]

>white
I really do wish i was white, the amount of times i get along with a girls and they say "damn if you where white we would have a great relationship"
good list though, fun read.

[myTake Owner]

This is just a gag list and the white is a preference

[Armourdillo]

it's a very wide spread preference

[myTake Owner]

Yah but I'm white myself so it make sence

[Armourdillo]

How great is it?

[Armourdillo]

wait did you mean that as "I'm white i can affirm how great it is?" or "I'm white so it makes sense for me to like white guys?"

[myTake Owner]

I'm saying I'm a white child so it makes sence kinda like dogs we bred specific breeds to get one no breed is better than the other but we have a preference for this breed of dog.

[Armourdillo]

ooh i see what your saying. But typically, girls of minorities prefer white men over their own race. I guess you guys do something right!

[myTake Owner]

Actually a lot of women of my race go for another color because they want a mix bread baby to put on social media. what's that saying I have heard white women say once you go black you never go back. I just personally find my own race more attractive kinda like how a chawawa is more likely to breed with another chawawa than it is a pit bull

[litty]

What would you do to get this perfect guy's attention?

[myTake Owner]

He will never be real so nothing

[litty]

How about an imperfect guy?

[myTake Owner]

Depends what he wants

[AlwaysBelieving]

I think it's more important to know what your core values are.

[myTake Owner]

I don't need core values because I'll be alone my whole life

[John_Doesnt]

Ron Jeremy gets laid because he's rich and has a big penis. That's all women care about.

[myTake Owner]

Um I care about neither of these things

[hiphopbean]

meet all of them except 11. brown eyes and black hair, and Asian.

[Daniel_James]

I would met all of those things except for:
5.
11. I have blue eyes and blond hair.
13.

[Daniel_James]

I also have a very deep voice which people comment on all the time, super annoying.

[myTake Owner]

Pft impressive didn't think anyone would get that cloce

[blackpantherbig]

anyway for most girls you forgot money :) money:) I am not suggesting they are golddiggers but guy without money is no ideal guy

[myTake Owner]

I don't care about his income