Should my boyfriend pay for my friend's drink if we all go out together?

Question

I wanted my boyfriend to meet my friend and we all went to a show together. My boyfriend got really cheap tickets. The show had a drink minimum per guest. My friend offered my boyfriend money to cover her drinks and he took it.

I am feeling embarassed like he is a stingy guy or not generous for taking the money from her. My friend is not upset because she knows she offered the money but she does think it is a little stingy.

I am questioning his character now.

bbch25 · Accepted Answer

Considering it was YOUR plan/idea, why didn't you buy the tickets and cover the friends drink if it was your friend you wanted your boyfriend to meet... Common denomination is you.

Your boyfriend didn't have to buy anyone anything, and the only person he should (MAYBE) have paid for, is you. If he's loaded and can splurge, maybe he could've shouted the friend but even if he's a billionaire, you stay a billionaire by being smart and it's entirely his choice to NOT spend it.

No he isn't stingy or not generous. It was her drinks.

How he treats people, how he treats the people serving those drinks, and your friends as a PERSON is what you should judge.

I think he could do better.

xXiTacoXx · Accepted Answer

He's your boyfriend, not hers. He should only be paying for the two of you since, he wanted to treat YOU and take YOU out. You wanting him to pay for her just because you asked her to come along to meet him is stupid. If she thinks he's stingy this means she's an idiot, and so are you for going along with it. It's not his job to pay for your friends every time you go out, but it is your friends job to pay for her own damn self. Would you try making him pay for any of your guy friends just because you want them to meet him? If not, then you shouldn't try making him pay for your girl friends either just because she's also a girl.

Wonderer89 · Accepted Answer

It's not your boyfriends responsibility to pay for your friends night out, it's not even his responsibility to pay for yours. He bought the tickets and based on your post I'm assuming he paid for your drinks too.
The fact you're questioning his character over this is pretty sad to be honest

NyomiMcClinton · Accepted Answer

It was actually nice that she offered to pay for her own drinks. But I think that he could of paid for her drinks, that would of been a gentleman and not only that the right to do since you all are friends. I do think what he did was cheap and stingy.

AynonOMouse · Accepted Answer

I am questioning your character. You are in the wrong here. There is absolutely NO reason why he should pay for one of your friends. What, should she feel entitled to be paid for just because she is female?
How sexist are you really?
If I was him and you even suggested that you were upset about it, I would break up with you right then.
And then your boyfriend did buy tickets, and all you do is complain that it wasn't good enough?
WTH?
He needs a better girlfriend that is less selfish and more caring.

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

Do you know enough about his financial situation to know whether he has the money to pay for her ticket and drinks?

Since you wanted your boyfriend to meet your friend, why didn't YOU pay for the tickets and drinks?

lualesca · Answer

She is YOUR friend, not HIS, if anything YOU should be the one paying for her drinks.

You call him stingy because he accepted her money, i hope you talk to him and say it to his face that he is stingy for accepting your friend's money, and let's see where that takes you.

Jesus, women need to get their heads straight.

Truthatanycost · Answer

The only persons character that should be questioned is yours. I can't believe there are people out their that think this way.

This is why I simply do not give any of you the time of day.

DISREGARD females, ACQUIRE gainz. Pay for your own damn drinks!

cavmanier · Answer

Think about what you're saying.

him paying for all your tickets + her offering him money for her drinks and him accepting + him paying for his and your drinks = he's stingy

him paying for all your tickets + him paying for everyones' drinks =/= her being stingy

Why is he stingy and not her or you?

ThisDudeHere · Answer

Ffs how about you and your friend be the adults you are and accept that he took what was offered?
Like, why would would the money be offered if it was expected for it to not be taken anyway? If she offered her money and he accepted then she has no right to complain. If her paying was such an 'issue' then she should have said it outright that he should pay for her.
"Oh but she would have come off as a self entitled birch if she were to do that..."

Excuse me but what are you now, when you 'question' a man's character for letting a girl spend money?

ShortCircuit · Answer

A guy should not be expected to pay for you, let alone your friend. Even if he did decide he wanted to treat you, on his own accord, out of the kindness of his heart, you should in no way expect him to pay for your friend - *especially* if you were the one who invited her.

It would be rude of him to pay for you in front of your friend, but not her. So yes, it should come down to either one of you paying for everyone, or everyone paying for themselves. However, if anyone does it, should be you, since you are the middleperson, *especially* if you were the one who organized the whole thing.

If it were me, and I was in a good mood, I would have given you some money to spend before leaving, so that your friend thought everyone was paying for themselves. That way, you wouldn't have to pay for everyone.

But since your boyfriend didn't think ahead, it would've been best for you to cover everyone's bills.

NexAngelus · Answer

my girlfriend did something like this once... and SHE paid for the friends drinks... and I WAS UPSET. the friend should of paid for her own drinks. the friend is not putting out or anything, they are not connected to us in any way besides "friends". since when do friends start paying for each others shit? now birthdays or something friends may but its up to them. u can NEVER said a friend is being cheap for NOT paying for u because its ur friend. and like i pointed out, since this was "ur event" with ur friend-s, u should of probably been the one paying. if he was introducing his friends to u, then he could of been incharge of what ever his friends were up to.

u let him be incharge, then talked about it behind his back... what was the point of u not doing it urself? id pro slap u for causing drama where there is none.

hellionthesagereborn · Answer

Is he fucking her? Because if not then he has no obligation to pay for her, in fact he has no obligation to pay for you either. Its stingy because he didn't pay for every one even some one he isn't in a relationship with but not stingy to want him to pay for you and your friend? He is the one who paid you didn't the only one who is cheap here is you and your friend. I think your character should be questioned not his.

kaylaS91 · Answer

... your boyfriend took your friend's offer to pay for her drinks. Your friend now thinks he's stingy, even though she was the one who offered to pay, and that's enough for you to 'question his character'?
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TiffyPuff · Answer

If she didn't want to pay, she shouldn't have offered. And frankly, he has no responsibility to pay for her... or YOU, for that matter... but definitely not for her.

Seriously, your entitlement and sexism should have him questioning YOUR character.

missashleyjames · Answer

You invited him to meet your friend. I mean I guess I don't know much about your relationship or his financial status but seeing as how you wanted him to meet your friend and he bought the tickets I wouldn't have expected my boyfriend to pay for my friend. If anything I would've paid for her while he paid for the two of us. That's just what makes the most sense to me.

Anonymous · Answer

Mmmm you invited your friend, its your friend, your boyfriend got all of the tickets and paid for his and your drinks, your friend got a free show but had to buy her own drinks...
And this makes him stingy?
Sounds like you dont have your heads on straight ^^

DodgersGM · Answer

Your boyfriend should've bought every single person at the show drinks. Because, ya know, we don't want him looking stingy...

TadCurious · Answer

Your friend offered to pay for her drink and now she thinks your boyfriend is stingy? In what world does that make any sense? Why did she offer to pay for her drink if she wasn't serious about actually paying? Evidently it was just for show, and some kind of "test" for your boyfriend. Not cool.

marths · Answer

No! He paid the ticket for you guys - your friend offered her money - these days don't expect everything from a man. He's your guy - yeah he should buy you a drink and being the first time meeting your friend he should've bought her one too but don't take that personal. Have you considered other possibilities other than him being "stingy" like maybe financial problems or not enough money etc. He came to meet your friend not anything else! He's impressed you enough to want to introduce him to your friend. Don't make it a big deal than it is

lostgirl_searching · Answer

Why are you questioning his character for?
My answer to your question is no. It's enough already he paid for you and your friend tickets and who cares if it was cheap, seriously. So I don't think it was wrong for him to take the money. Also who cares what your friend thinks.

Maik567 · Answer

So he bought tickets for all of you but you couldn't even offer the drinks? It's hilarious how you question his character when you didn't offer to do a damn thing for your boyfriend or your friend.

xHoneyxBeex · Answer

They are grown adults, they can pay for themselves. It's not his responsibility to foot the bill for your friends on a night out and I think it's sad that you expect him to.

pr3ttybr0wn · Answer

I wouldn't expect or want my boyfriend to be paying for my friend's anything. He's not responsible for her and I wouldn't want her thinking he's just gonna do shit for her.

RinRinSaysLol · Answer

Why do you expect the guy to pay for everything? So what if the movie was cheap? The important thing is that he was nice enough to pay for you.

I think he was being considerate because he's girlfriend is right there (you). If he was rushing to pay for your beat friend's part too, wouldn't that be warning signs?

GeekyPanda · Answer

Personally i don't think it's necessarilly the guys job to pay for anyone elses expenses other than his own. Girlfriend or not, men have to earn their living too. I believe one should pay for themselves and not expect someone else to do so for them. The odd treat here and there doesn't hurt but I don't think it's really his job, and choosing to pay for himself alone shouldn't change how you see him. If anything, maybe just split the bill next time :)

MargaritaPeach · Answer

Now that women have equal rights, we also have equal responsibilities. Your boyfriend may buy you a drink out of the kindness of his heart, but he is definitely not obligated to buy drinks for anyone else. And he's not being stingy.

Prettygurl12 · Answer

He is under no obligation to pay for anyone's drink but his. You should be thankful he's paying for YOURS. He is especially not obligated to pay for her drink. She's not his romantic partner.

Anonymous · Answer

So, you're asking him out, but not only do you not cover the bill, you let him pay for you? And not only that, you also expect him to pay for your friend? And you are questioning HIS character and HIS generosity now instead of your own?

Wow. Just wow.

gentelmenjack · Answer

because girls like free booze and shows😂😂
splitting is healthy n if you and your friends think they should not split but it's on boys ask her to why don't you pay for all of us... covering you is one and your friends is different
as a girl and your other girl friends will you guys take his gang to a cheap bar and say them it's girls night guys have your time we will pay..
sounds wearer weird even to Hear... you know why 😂😂

SteelerNation50 · Answer

Your boyfriend paid for all of the tickets and you think he's cheap because when your friend offered a couple dollars to cover her drinks he accepted? Why should your boyfriend pay for your friend at all?

SweetHomicidalQueen · Answer

No, maybe he should've declined to seem polite but she did offer.
If this is really something to question his character about then maybe you should leave him. It is his duty to take care of YOU. Not your friends. He can support them if you ask under certain circumstances, but they aren't his priority because you are.

chaleesi · Answer

i see what you mean but in my opinion that seems too petty to get worked up over. I mean, it was your friend that he didn't foot the bill for, not you- his girlfriend. sure, he could've been more generous, but some guys are just clueless lol. i'd only start to worry if he started doing that on dates or nights out with you. but if it's really bugging you, just talk to him about it.

TheDevilInside · Answer

No. What are you, a gold digger? He doesn't even HAVE TO pay for you. Buy your own shit

Anonymous · Answer

Lmfao I would put my friend in her place SO fast if she's expecting my boyfriend to pay her way. And if I was a guy, and my girl expected me to pay her friends way... she'd get put in her place so fuckin fast too

colourz · Answer

Why are you embarrassed? because he doesn't bow down to you and put you on a high horse because you have a vagina.

The only character that should be being questioned here is your friend. She sounds like a gold digger to me

gmanhotman · Answer

his job was to come out and hangout and meet your friends I would say that's fine. every time you take him to meet a new friend he shouldn't have to pay for anything in my mind for them but if he does that's nice of him. they are friends he's not on a date with them.

RJGraveyTrain · Answer

LOL.

I'm sorry but is your friend a child? Homeless? Broke?

Then why the hell should he pay? Better yet, YOU invited her, so doesn't that put the obligation of paying on your shoulders given that logic? Penis doesn't = footing the bill.

Tarvold · Answer

WTF?

He's not fucking your friend. Why should he pay for her, it wasn't even his idea to do this to begin with! He was gentleman enough not asking her to pay, but since she offered, it's fair. If anything, you should have covered the whole night because you wanted your boyfriend to meet your friend.

Relentless_Hippie · Answer

Ew what? She's your friend not his what the hell is wrong with you? It's not that serious and your friend is a grown woman. She can pay for her own stuff, he's your boyfriend not hers.

LPinky · Answer

😲 NO ONE SHOULD BE BUYING ANYONE DRINKS HERE, BUY YOUR OWN GOT DAMN DRINKS!!!

chrissykerdock · Answer

technically it would've been nice if he paid for her but he's not obligated to her but i can see your disappointment in him... remember she's not his date

Death_of_rats · Answer

he's not obliged to buy you or your friends drinks. This is just another case of girls wanting special treatment, yet constantly crying for equality.

and you have the nerve to call him stingy? grow up.

sedrftvgyhujik · Answer

Would you pay for drinks for his frends if you all when out?

Kamio · Answer

No! I don't think that it is stingy at all. Just coz he is a guy doesn't mean that he should have to cover everything and you're friend freely offered it. It's not like he asked her for it or something.

Anonymous · Answer

It's only one time so far, I wouldn't jump to conclusions yet. If he's always taking money from someone else for granted, only take and not give or pitch in for his part, such as never cover the costs or the bill then I would think he could be really stingy. He is working and have a job right?

answerALLquestions · Answer

Jesus, sounds like your boyfriend is in for a nightmare ride. Why should he be expected to pay for his gf's friends stuff. He didn't invite her out, you did

Zendrya · Answer

no why would he be responsible for that? He isn't even obligated to buy you drinks. Stop being sexist.

rose004b · Answer

No, there's no reason why your boyfriend should treat her. In any case, you're the one who should have paid for your friend's drinks if you invited her.

ACrazyHaggis · Answer

are you guys buying rounds? if yes then your boyfriend should chip in

are you guys not doing rounds and buying your own drinks? if yes then no your boyfriend should not pay fir your mates drink your boyfriend does not have form of logical obligation to pay for your buddies drinks simply due to their relation to you

meatballs21 · Answer

Why not invite your whole extended family and all their friends and their friends' families too, and make him pay OR ELSE.

Luci92 · Answer

Oh come on, she offered, he took it. Who cares? He still paid for tickets for all of you!

Mysterio421 · Answer

What? No. Why can't you pay for it? It's YOUR friend. Aren't women equal? Nothing wrong with living frugal. That's how people become millionaires.

myusernamerocks · Answer

I'd be embarrassed to take your friend's money and would have just paid for the both of you but that's just how I was raised.

Heythere2013 · Answer

Its not stingy that he didn't pay for her drink, she isn't his girlfriend, you are. Does he pay for you? If so he isn't stingy. Have you thought about maybe your boyfriend can't afford to treat everyone?

mutedaisy · Answer

Since you invited her, you should have covered her drinks.

sp33d · Answer

You find problems in such trivial things. Oh dear...

SoWhAt249 · Answer

Nothing wrong with it... It's a good trait actually... He knows how to handle funds...

hrk93 · Answer

No way. He got tickets for you and your friend, that was lovely of him, if I was your friend I would have bought him a drink, and I wouldn't of expected him to buy me anything at all.

Anonymous · Answer

He shouldn't even be paying for your drink. He isn't a bank account.
You shouldn't be questioning HIS character, he should be questioning YOURS.

If you believe that you should not have to pay for yourself because you have a man, you are what is wrong with our world.

CheerGirl38139 · Answer

I don't see how he's in the wrong here at all. Sorry

Notorisch_Arschloch · Answer

You are walking talking reason 124,738 why I don't even date anymore.

AleDeEurope · Answer

I'm questioning his character too. Why is he into bitches? Doesn't he know bitches love cake?

Anonymous · Answer

She is not making him cum so he doesn't even have to pay For her. She is her own person if you go out somewhere you make sure you have money he is not her dad.

menconfuseme12345 · Answer

It's not his responsibility to pay for your friend. He's not dating her, he's dating you.

what-do-guys-want · Answer

I would not expect my boyfriend to pay for my friends drinks. He got her cheap tickets in the first place, if she wants to drink then that's on her.

Should my boyfriend pay for my friend's drink if we all go out together?

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Should my boyfriend pay for my friend's drink if we all go out together?

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