Do you think the hook up culture is destroying the concept of relationships and love in general?

[Anonymous]

Do you think in the near future people will stop caring for each other and rather pump and dump and ghost people? Do love even exist in this current generation?

[englisc]

I think it is. As I always say the family is the foundation of any strong society. Now we've lost those old family values because we're taught that they're oppressive people have become more self-centred. They care more about pleasure-seeking than anything else. Many young people today don't want kids because they want to live for themselves. They never grow up into anything but adult children, and this is what you get. Someone said that it happens less than people think, but in my experience it happens more than people think. I don't envy anybody who is single and still dating people today because most people have such stupid ideas on relationships and many are damaged. Almost everything about our culture today is rotten.

[Astria]

Yeah, I agree this selfish, materialist society is breaking down because people no longer have values. It's not about being religious either, it's about being a good human being.

[englisc]

@Astria

Yeah, people are right when they say that it's nothing new, but they're wrong when they say that it's abolutely fine. In every culture that has gone the way we're going in the past it has led to collapse. What we're seeing are the signs of a dying society - you're right when you say it's breaking down. While I don't come at this from a religious point of view either and as a pagn myself I can see why people today reject Christianity, I do think that religion or the lack of it also plays a role in the downfall.

[Astria]

Yeah, the Romans use to participate is all sorts of debauchery, have orgies, toss babies in garbage piles where they would later be picked up to be used as sex slaves. Today, they are installing drop boxes for babies and some, with inside information, are saying those babies will be sold into child sex trafficking rings.

With the breakdown of religion, there is no longer God fearing people, only law fearing ones. This is where we are now I think. I wish people could at least see some wisdom in the bible and other sacred texts and not throw out all morality and principles for a rejection & rebellion against religion.

One of the best human beings I know is an atheist. He cares about other people and animals, he's the kind of guy who stands up to immoral people. He once said to me people should be good not because of fear but because it's the right thing to do... sort of like be good for goodness sake. :) I thought that was very true.

[thinker_]

@Astria The core problem is not of following religion or bible, but understanding the meaning of it instead.

I believe a real atheist is spiritualist because they believe in themselves and their thinking.

following a religion is just like buying a candle, it depends on whether your use matchstick to light it up or not.

[englisc]

@Astria

They are? That's terrible but I can believe it. Where are they doing this and who would be selling them into sex slavery?

What you say about law vs. God fearing people is true. Again I can understand the rejection of the idea of the Christian God but in the past religion did provide us with a moral framework which we no longer have.

Your friend is right, but I think that's an unrealistic expectation. As we see today without that fear of God many people act like assholes just because they can.

I think that the main problem is that when a society gets too comfortable and too successful people forget about what brought them to the level of success they're at, and also people don't seem to learn from history.

[Astria]

@thinker_

I like that about the candlel. I'm not a fan of fundamentalist religion at all, it's a cause of many problems in the world but I have also met a lot of selfish atheist jerks and many atheist scientists have had an agenda in my opinion.

[thinker_]

@Astria what do u mean by atheist?

also, by including candle example I remove some of the nonsense many religion preachers ask you to do.

I believe donate candles instead of lighting up in church (Christian)
give sheets to poor instead of giving it at Mosque (Muslim)
give Milk to poor instead of using it to pray in some temples (Hindu)

When u really read bible, quran or gita u will find out what's right and what's not. Also, these books will help you to establish your way of thinking.

for me, atheists are people who believe in themself and their decision

and if one apple is foul it shouldn't stop you from eating others, i suppose

[Astria]

@thinker_

That's good sense. I've read the gita, some of the bible and bits of the Quran, as well as many other sacred texts. To me the details and rituals (as you describe) are not what the founders of the religions wanted. Also, I find it strange that people call themselves Christians and think killing people in war is good. Really, religions have little to do with the texts.

If you're atheist you might not like my take on atheism (even though one dear friend doesn't mind). True Atheism would only exist if people never had a concept of God in the first place. It is not the absence of belief but the denial or rebellion against the concept of God. They had the concept of God first.

[thinker_]

@Astria I am not atheist because I can go to any temple or church and preach

because i am not preaching to god but calming myself up, I am thinking about what's going inside my mind and meditating up

this I understood by studying the core of Sikhism, I follow Gurudwara based because I found least wastage of resources there

[Astria]

@thinker_

Oh interesting, I'll be looking forward to getting to know more. I can agree with just about any belief system as I think there is some truth in all of them. Sometimes people have a problem with me, not the other way around. :D

But porn is a different story, it's a no go with me because I see its impact on culture and it isn't beneficial to people.

[thinker_]

@Astria you think its not benefit the society

did u do any research to see through it or had some discussion?

because I had a discussion and can put some counter arguments

[Astria]

@thinker_

Yeah, you can look through my posts if you want. You can start with this article:
barbwire.com/.../

Also I just found a legal site that states a study ha found 56% of divorces are caused by a pornography addiction.

[thinker_]

@Astria lol addiction is bad in general, are u open that drugs, tabacoo or anything that harm people if addicted should be ban?

Addiction I do agree, but if i am not an addict then would u have any problem

[englisc]

@thinker

I think the difference is that most people don't realise how harmful porn actually is.

[Astria]

@thinker_

All you have to ask yourself is... would you want your family members doing porn?

There is your answer.

[thinker_]

@Astria doing porn or watching porn?

[Astria]

@thinker_

When you watch, you are creating a demand for it.

[thinker_]

its taboo talking porn and stuff here in public, so this has ensured that older generation doesn't do that so openly and also my mindset is bind to this taboo society so i would try to manipulate the upcoming generation to not do so.

and I can't say about if my society would have been open to do discuss and share these things openly because modelling that much of thinking would be faking in reality

[Astria]

Indiana installed them. I thought it was more recent but apparently not.

www.dailymail.co.uk/.../...ed-newborns-safety.html

"the main problem is that when a society gets too comfortable and too successful people forget about what brought them to the level of success they're at, and also people don't seem to learn from history."

So true and also it's so disrespectful to all those noble people of the past. People need to stop being so entitled and selfish and start helping in each other. Things are changing though, people are realizing it's more interesting to be actively participating in making the world better than passively waiting for other people to do it. We all have a duty to do something when we see injustice and corruption.

[englisc]

@Astria

I don't know how anybody could just dump a baby, so fucked up.

It is disrespecful. Our ancestors sacrificed everything to get us to where we are today, many of them fought and died for it. Then people today like I said just want to live for themselves and let it all go to shit.

Unfortunately I think it's too late to try to fix society as a whole and I think it will just get worse and worse, most people have been so dumbed down that they'll just carry on doing what they're doing until we see the inevitable collapse. I just think that those with their heads screwed on should stick together.

[Astria]

I know, we have to stick together. Q says, whether you believe it's a larp or not, it's the great awakening, I think today we are seeing an apocalyptic-like divide in consciousness, those who get it and those who really just don't. I would give up my life to save just one baby from being being sold into child trafficking. How a mother could do that is beyond me. I think they should give out the morning after pill freely to stupid people.

[englisc]

@Astria

I'm not sure what you mean by great awakening? If you mean a great awakening as in the large majority of people beginning to wake up, I can't see that happening at all. No culture in the past has ever survived the things we're seeing now. The only thing right-thinking people can do I think in such a situation is stick together, ride it out, and then build something new once it all falls.

[thinker_]

@Astria the issue is that you are not discussion each stuff by their priority you are plugging things up from one problem to another problem, by this evolution in society yes there has been issues that have been created but this evolution has solved much older shit behavior too.

@Astria we can discuss this societal change thing up in detail but you have to stick with one problem till you are satisfied by my way of seeing it (logical way with facts to contribute).

[englisc]

@thinker_

I wouldn't say that our society has "evolved". Most people call it progression, but progression isn't always good - for example cancer progresses from one stage to another as it becomes more severe.

Plus again, what we're seeing today is very similar to what happened right before the collapse of cultures in the past e. g. the fall of Rome. No culture has ever survived these things, and ours most likely will fall too. Apart from modern technology - which brings a lot of problems too - nothing we see today is new e. g. the breakdown of families, bad parenting, promiscuity etc.

As for porn, it has been proven to change the way the brain is wired and to affect the brain in a similar way to hard drugs:

www.yourbrainonporn.com/brain-scan-studies-porn-users

Which "old shit behaviours" do you mean?

It also seems odd that you'd say that someone needs to argue something until they see it the way you see it.

[thinker_]

I always work harder to find the real essence of working of society

at least in my case, it has evolved

there might have been many issues but there are some positive sides too.

I always try to find light even in the dark room because other wise there is no point of our existence

[Astria]

"I'm not sure what you mean by great awakening? If you mean a great awakening as in the large majority of people beginning to wake up, I can't see that happening at all."

The internet changes all of that. Qanon talks about the #greatawakening in terms of seeing what our government has really been up to. I think it goes a step further. I won't lie, the majority of people will cover their ears and remain ignorant likely but there will be massive change, there already is.

"No culture in the past has ever survived the things we're seeing now."

No doubt we are headed into the storm now. Things will get much worse before it gets better.

"The only thing right-thinking people can do I think in such a situation is stick together, ride it out, and then build something new once it all falls."

Sure, I agree, this is the divide I was speaking of.

[Astria]

@thinker_

" the issue is that you are not discussion each stuff by their priority you are plugging things up from one problem to another problem"

You just aren't connecting the dots because you don't have enough information.

"we can discuss this societal change thing up in detail but you have to stick with one problem till you are satisfied by my way of seeing it (logical way with facts to contribute)."

I don't have to do anything, I don't take orders from anyone. You've provided no facts at all. I've provided many, that article is fully based on fact. You clearly have no idea about what you're talking about here and are likely defending it to justify wanking off to all those girls that are trafficked, on drugs, runaways etc. It's not a moral choice and you know that deep down. I'm sure you wouldn't want to see your mom giving blowjobs and riding dirty perverts in porn (at least I would hope not).

[thinker_]

Lol then that's wrap for me

Because these dots doesn't seem logical at all

[Astria]

@thinker_

What doesn't seem logical exactly? Or are you talking out of your ass?

[Astria]

@thinker_

Just curious because englisc followed them just fine.

[thinker_]

Because you are seeing only one side of picture (-ve one)

But logics says see both positive and negative side of that argument to reach to a generalize conclusion

[thinker_]

Also I like to have a discussion in which both learns something new and open to learning

Because it's not a debate but a discussion

[thinker_]

If a change has more negatives than positives

It doesn't mean we forget those positive one

Just think in case of vicevera

[Astria]

@thinker_

You say it's a not a debate but a discussion but wrote:

"we can discuss this societal change thing up in detail but you have to stick with one problem till you are satisfied by my way of seeing it (logical way with facts to contribute)."

Where are your facts and logic because I'm not seeing it so far.

You mentioned taboo but do you really think sex is a taboo subject when most of the people writing on here are asking sex questions?

[thinker_]

Taboo in society where I live because you asked me whether would I allow my family to be in porn stuff

[thinker_]

I have give proper logical reference that are very easy to understand

[Astria]

@thinker_
I don't think you answered, do you want your mom in porn movies?
So what is your logical argument for porn based on fact? Please support with statistics.

[thinker_]

Lol that's why I mentioned taboo which prevents talking about sex in general in my community

Let's alone leave participation in them

[Astria]

@thinker_

So how is that an argument for porn and what is factual about that?

[thinker_]

Means?

I don't understand

[Astria]

@thinker_

I thought you were trying to convince me how porn is good with facts. I'm not even seeing a logical argument based on feeling, let alone fact.

[thinker_]

I am not saying it's good

But I am neither going towards baning it

Also I am completely against its addiction

[thinker_]

I am saying someone can watch porn if he/she knows the inner workings of this industry and whatever happens in porn doesn't mean it's possible in real lofe

[thinker_]

*life

I also know the bad impacts on society

[Astria]

@thinker_

Are you under the impression that we don't care if our mothers are in porn in the West... because sex isn't a taboo subject?
What precisely are the inner workings of porn?
When did I say porn should be banned?

Please explain logically based on fact not opinion or feeling.

[thinker_]

Let's consider logic here

It's a profession, so if someone wants to be a part of it, they shouldn't be stopped

With inner workings I meant someone who is watching porn videos understand that it's a fiction and if he/she does same thing in real life, it can harm someone.

I am not commenting on people who are in porn videos because I believe they do it with consent

I am totally against illegal porn videos

[Astria]

@thinker_
"It's a profession, so if someone wants to be a part of it, they shouldn't be stopped"
I never said anything about people being banned or people being stopped. That would never stop it anyway if there was demand for it. We were talking about the morality of it (in relation to the destruction of culture, of family values and love... which is the topic here)

"With inner workings I meant someone who is watching porn videos understand that it's a fiction and if he/she does same thing in real life, it can harm someone."

You really think that most people who watch watch understand it's influence on them?
There are many studies out there showing the link between sexual violence and porn.
Here is a starter for you to read: https://www.josh.org/pornography-and-crime/
If you want more information, I'd be happy to find you dozens of studies on this.

"I am not commenting on people who are in porn videos because I believe they do it with consent"

Some do but not all.

[Astria]

who watch it*

I really see no logical convincing argument for porn here at all and that's because there isn't one.

[thinker_]

Destruction of culture depends on how u have been raised, when I joined this conversation whole context was switched by that time.

That's why I mentioned about working, to complement affect on the society.

Force is in every field, if it doesn't make any other field bad then why this?

Labourers are forced to work unethically but we say those organisations who behaves like this are morally incorrect.
We don't say labour industry is morally bad (I don't need fact to prove this)

[Astria]

@thinker_

"Destruction of culture depends on how u have been raised, when I joined this conversation whole context was switched by that time."

So I guess you didn't read the article about Hefner and Kinsey. I would say normalizing child porn is pretty destructive to a culture, wouldn't you? barbwire.com/.../

"That's why I mentioned about working, to complement affect on the society."

Your English isn't very good, I hate having to try to interpret what you are saying. Are you really trying to say porn is positive because sex workers are working? Do you think that of hookers and drug dealers too?

"Force is in every field, if it doesn't make any other field bad then why this?"

How does this relate to porn?

"Labourers are forced to work unethically but we say those organisations who behaves like this are morally incorrect. We don't say labour industry is morally bad (I don't need fact to prove this) "
There is no good porn like ethical labour, the industry is unethical.

[hellionthesagereborn]

Love will always exist, relationships will always exist. Hook up culture has definitely ruined these things for those who participate in it but even they will eventually desire relationships and love as hooking up is not meaningful or fulfilling (base upon statistical data). The problem is it ruins a lot of people so by the time they realize this their is ample damage done, most stop being able to function in a normal relationship because they have never really been in one. Its a terrible thing but their will always be a desire for meaningful relationships and love.

[iamshan]

Well said

[hellionthesagereborn]

@iamshan Thank you.

[Greatcat]

indeed well said, but the reason they can't function in a normal healthy relationship isn't just because they've never been in one, those that remain virgins to an older age like 25 or older generally end up functioning well in long term relationships.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat I know the statistics. Their are many reasons for it, promiscuity is not healthy. People presume that because we have a drive that it means we where built to indulge it which is not true. For instance sugars, we have a strong drive to consume them yet this is actually bad for our health. the reason is because high sugar content foods where good for immediate energy but they where also harder to come by. As such we evolved to desire them more, that way we would consume them when the opportunity arose. The problem is that we made them far more available then they where prior and our bodies have not adapted to it. Same with sex, it was meant to drive us to enter relationships as short term survival was priority (because so many things would terminate life early), it was a motivator and sex was harder to come by because women took a lot of risk in reproduction.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat We have now removed that risk and people think that now suddenly hundreds of millions of years of evolution is going to go away because of it and that's simply not the case. I simply chose one of the simpler reasons because I can rattle off statistics all day and as you have noted, I have already managed to max out the character limit as is. But yes, it is true it increases risks of divorce, depression, cheating etc. Its not good for a person.

[Greatcat]

rattle away dude take as many comments as you like, this is information that everyone needs to hear and if only a few read it you will have benefited some. You watch stefan molyneux?

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat I have rattled away, multiple times, most ignore it so I go for the short and sweet unless their is a need. Some times I watch him, don't agree with everything he says (but then who agrees with everything some one says?(if you do then your not thinking for yourself)) but he has some good stuff (I do recall him having about an hour talk on promiscuities negative affects using the heritage foundations findings if I'm not mistaken.).

[Greatcat]

yeah I don't agree with everything he says either and of course nobody should agree 100% with everything else, but when it comes to the foundations of a healthy society, the basic moral code that we should all share for prosperity and peace, we agree. His call in shows talking to women of 30+ years of age who fkd up and were to promiscuous opened my eyes... I don't know where else I would stumble across this info

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat Very true. I feel bad for those women because they where told that behaving in that way would make their lives better and they just followed the advice that society gave them only to find that it ruined their life, it didn't enrich it. Its pretty terrible (which is why every time I see some one talking about partner numbers etc, I always try and provide the data that shows that promiscuity hurts people in the long run.). The irony is that hedonism is encouraged yet the original hedonist philosophy (basically that which brings happiness is good) realized that decadence was not beneficial and generally distracted you from the things that did make you happy, like stable monogamous relationships, family, etc. Another interesting person to listen to is Dr. Jordan Peterson, I highly recommend his lectures (though I would guess you probably already heard of him, his popularity has grown quite a bit), he points this out as well that responsibility leads to happiness.

[Greatcat]

yeah im actually going to see him in a few months :D

[Greatcat]

hmmm interesting point about the original hedonist philosophy, I gotta look into that, yeah it is sad because most people just don't know any better and few will tell them the truth because if they do that they'll just get hit with 'oh your just a loser who doesn't get laid' so basically until you meet your wife you can't say anything and by the time you do you aren't hanging out with kids anymore. In walks jordan peterson and look at how many people are completely unwilling to hear him out to the point of trying to ban him / ruin is life. Speak the truth through the slings and arrows, make yourself strong so you survive, the one thing peterson appears to have missed is becoming TWISSSTED STEEEL!!! He's been surrounded by mobs that could easily shitkick him, you gotta be bruce lee to deal with that shit so all of us who wanna speak truth in the face of the backlash must bruce lee ourselves.

[Greatcat]

at lest in Canada cause we can't use guns or any weapon to defend ourselves

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat Canada has decayed greatly (or I am just more aware of the issues their now). However it is vital to speak the truth because no matter what any one says to you, does to you the truth once stated cannot be unheard. St. Augustine had a good quote about that, "Do not protect the truth, it is a lion. Just let it out of its cage and it will do the rest." and that's exactly what Jordan Peterson did and with the internet this is truer then ever before, once the truth is out it cannot be stopped, its the one completely unassailable and unbreakable thing in the universe. That's why we are starting to see a shift in society, the younger generation is actually pulling away from the current social ideals because they have seen the damage it does and once seen cannot be unseen.

[Greatcat]

lol it's damn slow dude, and most of them are pulling away yeah but into what other insanity? As far as people actually getting towards the truth, yeah the one's that choose to open their eyes to it have a great deal of information at their fingertips through the internet but as far as the amount of people breaking out of that cage, I don't know where the real numbers are. At least where I live, I am fucking dismayed. I have not met one person that has really got a nose for truth, the closest i know jumped on the fking neo nazi bandwagon and the degenerated alt right, which i thought used to mean something different but apparently means national socialist whites

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat Yes that is an issue. However I do believe in the silent majority, most people just keep their head down and mind their own business so while you can't count on them outright, they are also not at the extremes so they don't work against you. Persistence is key. Also yes, if your in Canada things are pretty bad but they are pushing hard and that means an inevitable push back, it may be slow but that's only because it hasn't picked up momentum yet, it will.

[Greatcat]

as long as we are all paying our taxes to the corrupt government we are working against the real freedom movement... the conservative backlash in our country is a fking joke, the leader of the party disavowed the rebel media and refuses to interview with them... they aren't even as anti gov't as I am and as the real truthers should be.

[hellionthesagereborn]

@Greatcat As I said, it takes time to build up steam. I do not know how things are in Canada, but take the US, the election of Trump, the wave of conservative candidates gaining office in the states, the UK with their push back with brexit, Italy has elected a conservative anti E. U. politician into office and they have gained enough power where their is a very real possibility of them leaving the EU. Its happening , but it is happening slower in some areas then others. Again, not sure where Canada is at right now but from what I can tell it IS happening. Definitley keep fighting and keep telling the truth because all of those who try to silence the truth do so because they know they cannot win against it. The truth is the only thing that cannot be broken or destroyed, it cannot be stopped once let out, but lies don't last forever, its only a matter of how long before the lies are broken and how much damage is done in the mean time.

[Greatcat]

trump tricked us all. We are getting much the same government as we've always had, yeah the noose is loosened a little bit for the sake of generating wealth and the quality of life will improve under trump's america but the way I see it they just put him in there to avoid being overthrown. He's supposed to appease us arms bearing 1776 type folk. There is no significant truth movement in Canada and I've yet to meet a single person who shares my views in this entire country except stefan molyneux and he's on the east coast and is an old man. Where are the rebellious youth? They don't exist here. They go to protests demanding MORE government benefits which means increased taxation and these idiots just keep chasing their carrot on a stick. Anyone against that mainstream agenda is a nazi, even my jewish self. This country is fucking retarded and I don't plan on staying here.

[coralee]

Don't believe the hype. Younger people are actually engaging in less sex then previous generations. www.thestar.com/.../...ls-are-having-less-sex.html
People have been engaging in casual sex since we first figured out what sex was. History is full of torrid love affairs, and crazy sex stories. Look up the Marque De Sade he's the reason we have the word sadism. Relationships will be fine.

[Astria]

Good question. It most definitely is! People don't treat each other with respect anymore, it has gone way too far.

I find current western culture toxic and prefer to watch older movies and music because of that. Men used to have to be charming to even get a kiss or hold holds, now it's rip off your clothes and give the goods now or you're a prude. No thanks.

[Astria]

Hold hands*

:)

[Logorithim]

It is more a reflection of the instability in society and people's lives than a cause of it, IMHO.

[NiceOrHonest]

To be honest i think love will always exist i do not blame it on the hook up culture that it gets destroyed allthought i am not a fan of it my self.

Personally i blame it on the social media in general and the online dating market but the main problem is society who pushes people towards digital communication in the first place. I mean the smell and with smell i mean the smell we capture unawarely and the touch of another person aswell as the energy is missing to even start a connecting/bonding on a intiem level it also misses nervosity and excitement it is easy to hide behind a mask on a online chat and geting the wrong vibes.

as much as we may hate it were human and were animals just like cats and dogs not saying we should behave like them since not every animal behaves the same (unlike people who act like donky's or other animals😂). Just look at it there is no denying that people ussually grow bored fast when it comes to online stuff and in my opinion a few reasons are the factors i list above.

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on the person and how many times you hooked up. If you have Sex with many many people, how can you value sex with a special one more? Sex should be special, but it loses its value, when you sleep with everyone. You will overwrite your thinking of what sex is and what you do. Its very hypothetic. I know, that Sex raises the trust between both partners, but what happens when you have many many sexual partners? Could it be, that it gets harder for you to bind/relate with someone? I think it depends on the person. Sex shouldt be the first step of a relationsship. You can't get to know a person by having Sex with him/her. Puh.. But how do i know what others think. I am not Part of the hook up culture. I had one girlfriend in my life. And i know that i can love again. The sad thing is.. that when you are attractive, women think that i am part of this hook up culture and ignore me, because "i am just a replacable Sex object". Oh man.. I hate this culture. Maybe i just give up sooner or later. Its so hard to talk to many women, cos they think its a flirt.

[AynonOMouse]

It is ruining relationships.
That is why people are confused and actually ask each other to be BF/GF these days. It should be obvious, because normally if people keep spending time together and share intimacy they are in a relationship.
But these days people are VERY stupid, have bad morals, and they just go around screwing lots of people, then they somehow expect all of those sluts and players to magically change and become good, loyal, faithful mates. lol
Anyone that does that stuff is an immoral idiot. I see them as scum and will never respect those kinds of people.

I wish we could divide the country in half and put those people separate from the normal people.

[ClumsyGuy]

The country would be divided more like 90-10 instead of 50-50!

[10dsw]

Yes I do.

The average looking woman is flattered way too much by internet strangers which leads to overestimating her self-worth.

80% of online men don't ever get a match on Tinder. 20% get too many matches. Ergo that 20% have sex all the time and never need to settle down.

The 20% of course have enough options that they ghost on most women. Then those women (somewhat understandably) start assuming all men are ghosting sexual pigs...

... and the cycle continues

[LegateLanius]

Nope.
If there is a hookup culture today, then that means that there has always been a hookup culture. I have some rough news for you, kids: when your parents were our age, they were having sex with other people. Probably lots of other people--your mom might have gotten laid more often than you will in your entire life. Have you ever heard of the sexual "free-love" movement of the sixties and seventies? This goes for your grandparents as well, and their parents--the roaring twenties were named that for a reason. Basically, people have always been having wild sex in their youth before settling into relationships.
The real problem we have to face is why this generation is the one that gets demonized as having a hookup culture. The answer is probably because we are open about it.

[JDavid25]

Well yeah but I think it goes deeper than that.. I think porn is makin people look at sex as this thing fun excercise that feels good, and not the intimate settin it's suppose to be.. That contributes to people just wantin to hook up wit no strings attached just to experience a little of what they see in porn, or just to fulfilled the sensation porn cannot.. And that leads them to view relationships definitely, or not wannabe in one..

[iamshan]

And that's why I don't watch porn.

[JDavid25]

@iamshan That's good.. More power to you.. 8)..

[Astria]

Great answer! :)

I wish more people were like you and could see the truth in this.

[JDavid25]

@Astria True.. Well as long as there are some that's what matters.. 8)..

[DazzlingOfMind]

Perfect answer.

[imAMyth]

I would compare it with Fast food (hook up culture) wrt healthy food (old school love and relationship). The former may give you instant gratification but it's time and time proved to be unhealthy and toxic. While healthy food may be less appealing but it the long run its very good.

[ClumsyGuy]

Very nice analogy

[Astria]

@ClumsyGuy

Yes, it is.

[ClumsyGuy]

@Astria you're into fast food or healthy ones?

[Astria]

@ClumsyGuy

100% healthy (except the odd latte)

[ClumsyGuy]

@Astria is that how you've got your hot looks? xD

[Sawyerblu]

Y E S 100%. I do think love exists but I think it’s rare that younger people find it because why buy the cow when you can milk it for free. Everyone hooks up nowadays because they can, but our parents and the generations before them were very keen on dating and marriage. It highkey sucks. Ya girl just wants to be loved!!!

[_____yvm_]

Can you please follow my account?

[VinChin]

Great question and one I've thought of too. I go out a fair bit and see a lot of hook ups happen.
It's a matter of choice really, there's nothing wrong with a hook up. But we aren't like the past with guys trying hard to get the Governors daughter's attention lol.
Traditional love is there but the hook up world has evolved a lot from when it was basically taboo.
I think because sex/sexting/hooking up is so open now it feels hard to find people wanting the real thing.
Especially in the age range of 20-30 yr olds.
Just my two cents 😎 Cheers.

[vald9inches]

I don't think it is destroying or ruining the concept of relationships. By getting out there and seeing what is available and gaining experience in the wants and need of the opposite sex we all learn more about each other so when it comes time to look for something more stable we will make less mistakes. We will also be less prone to making impulsive decisions into getting into a relationship from the pressures of physical attraction and think more deeply about the chemistry.

and for the second part of your question, love is a very idealistic dream i am not even sure if it exist. a quote i like very much goes like this “To love is nothing... To be loved is something... To love and be loved in return is everything.” it's very unlikely you find mutual love and even if you do people naturally change and don't stay the same so whatever love there is will evaporate away. But in the meantime we all can love each other and everyone in the world physically lol

[Gotopinions]

Do I think it's troublesome on a family values standpoint? Of course. However, promiscuity has been around for thousands of years. Ancient Rome was known for having wild orgies where men and women would pleasure eachother, there was your traditional procreational relationship that spawned offspring, but other than that it was quite open, men with men, women with women, there was no judgement, and that was one of the strongest empire's on the planet at one point. Bastard children ran rampant.

Nothing that is happening today in respect to relationship and family values that hasn't happened at the very least, once in the past. The only major difference is what diseases are out there, people have to be careful.

In terms of sustainability of the human population, despite the hookup culture and whole families, people are still having children frequently. The human population will continue to grow.

[Galemead]

Based off of the 2 relationships I've had so far, it sure feels like hook up culture is overtaking relationships :/ First guy left after finding a different girl, second guy couldn't decide between me or his ex so I choose for him. Seems like guys nowadays are always looking for a girl better than the one they have. But hey, that's my opinion. I'm sure other people have had much better luck in relationships than me.

[Shiraa]

Nope. Hookups have been around of centuries. We're now just more honest about it and accepting it more. In the end most people want to settle down and start a family and if you don't then that's completely fine. Exploring your options is completely normal before you get into a committed relationship, it assures you that you're not missing out on something

[BraveHeart97]

I don’t think that’s true, even if someone has been around the field they’ll still be unable to commit because they’ll always think they can find someone better.

[memyselfandiamhere]

A study from 2015 says that about 30-40% of women who Had more then 10 different sexual Partners befor marriage, are significantly less Happy in marriage

[Shiraa]

I think that completely depends on the person. Some people are simply not made for a committed relationship. I have slept with guys without being in a relationship and I've actually realised because of that that I'm more happy in a serious relationship with 1 person and I can't wait to get married and start a family. Also I think that most people, even those who haven't been around the field, will feel like there is someone better out there. It's a normal and common fear to have especially when your marriage isn't the best

[BraveHeart97]

@Shiraa Hope your boyfriend isn’t a virgin. It’ll be really fucked up if he was a virgin and find out you’ve been around the field.

[Shiraa]

I actually wouldn't want to date a virgin. I prefer men with some experience

[memyselfandiamhere]

Braveheart97, i guess this also depends on the Person, like i knu my girlfriend Had about 6-7 Guys Last year and i Had Like 2 Girls, but that ain't a compatition, because this is just Life as it Happens...
I dont care about relationships from the past.

[Adam_INTJ]

We were destined to get to this point ever since people thought that it was acceptable to have sex outside of marriage.

Sex used to mean that you had something truly valuble with that person, but now it just means that you and somebody else happened to be horny on the same night.

People are going to start doing sexual things before even shaking hands at some point with the route we're on.

[LeeKenz]

Very well said

[djmzes]

It is but we will continue cuz we are so stupid and coward to change and standup and say it is wrong when everyone says it is ok.

Guys may stand up but women will never standup that and tell their friend... you are fucking your life.

But anyway the society has more slut n jerks without brains than slut with brains.

[Mr___A]

Not at all...
It's just a reaction to the puritanic former culture.
Nobody can tell whether young people share love or not. It's not likely to be supposed.
Things are not that simple, happily.
And sexual freedom has nothing to do with love survival. There is no incompatibility, nor need.
Happily, i 'd Say again ^^

[Porcelaine]

No. :D just because it's a popular thing these days, it's still a choice. There are plenty of people who prefer to be in a loving relationship rather than keep hooking up, so they either get to know the person before 'hooking up', or they simply continue dating the person after they 'hooked up'. it depends on who you are and how you approach your dating life

[memyselfandiamhere]

There is a study from 2015 that States that people who have more then 10 Sexpartners befor marriage will be significantly less Happy in marriage.

I dont have the Numbers in my head but it was something like 30-40% of women, i dunno

[Porcelaine]

@memyselfandiamhere and I can find you another study that will tell you the opposite. I say stop reading articles and just live the life how you like, that will make you happier then reading these studies

[JSmith925]

I think it is an incontrovertible fact, regardless of my opinion. Our divorce rate is 50% and our illegitimacy rate is 40%. How could we possibly deny the effects of transient relationships on our culture?
~JSmith

[genericname85]

no it's not. hooking up and dumping isn't a problem. but yeah i think the ghosting part is. cause people are not responsible for their shit anymore. they shouldn't be having sex, if they can't tell someone to the face that they don't wanna see them again.