My boyfriend called me a fucking idiot for accidentally locking him out. We haven’t talked in 5days and it’s his birthday tomorrow. What do I do?

[Perspective22]

I have a habit of locking doors behind me and I have locked my boyfriend out twice. I was never far and he was not out there for long like 2mins. Last time I did it I opened the door, Appolized right away but he called me a fucking idiot so I turned around and went to bed. I wasn't going to engage. When I woke up he was on the couch he never came to bed and told me that he doesn’t think we should see each other durning the week anymore. He had already taken my key off my ring. It’s his place but I’m there all the time at his request. I grab a few of my things and left. It’s been 5 days and neither of us are calling or texting. It’s his birthday tomorrow and I have no clue if I should call or not or what I should do. I feel his reaction was over kill and the name calling broke my heart. We have talked about name calling before. Any advice would be great.

[JustMyTake]

I think it's worth considering, if he reacts that way when you do something accidentally, how he will react when you do something purposely that he doesn't like (which everybody does.) My dad and my mom had vicious screaming matches when I was younger. By comparison, my dad gets angry and maybe quiet or snaps when my mom lets him in. He's never called her a "fucking idiot" though. And this wasn't the ideal relationship, believe me.

If it were me, I would let this die. Especially if this is routine. Anger issues aren't a reason to end a relationship, but if he starts directing that anger towards you, that's a massive red flag. It's a horrible situation. But consider if you think he will ever change.

[JustMyTake]

I mean when my mom lets him in after locking him out. For five minutes sometimes. What else has he called you?

[JacksonH]

Yeah he definitely over reacted. I can see him being annoyed, but to not talk to you for five days and calling you names over sometime so miniscule is over the top. Locking doors behind isn't a bad habit, so does he not have a key to his own place?

I honestly think the best you should do is wish him a happy birthday either by calling or text, whichever you prefer and leave it at that. After that, don't talk to him. You apologized for your part, not he has to for his. If he doesn't reach out within a week max, you might have to officially end it.

[nofunkgiven]

He overreacted really. You already apologized so there is nothing left you should do. Just try not locking him out in the future.

[Philyouup]

if one needs to be concerned about repeating a simple absentminded mistake, that should be a warning

[nofunkgiven]

True that

[Perspective22]

@Philyouup that’s kind of where my head is at

[Philyouup]

I truly hope you consider you situation and see it for the unhealthy relationship it is.. If this is typical behavior, it will only worsen

[abundantlyrich]

Stay away for the time being... he had an episode. They will take two weeks to recover.

[Perspective22]

What do you mean episode?

[abundantlyrich]

He's a manic. Psychosis.

[i1T2daty]

Nothing and tell him you must be such a fucking idiot to have forgotten. Go out with some friends on his birthday and tell him your not sure you want him in your life any longer. The only tiny reason there may be to not kleave him would be 1) nothing like that has ever happened before, 2) he had an incredibly bad day and apologized for what he said immediately after the words were out of is mouth.

Guys who emotionally abuse will inevitably get more abusive and likely lead to physical abuse. Get out now before he considers you his possession and gets sociopathic when you finally do leave him.

If he has ever disrspected you in the past than its a pattern of abuse that you should get as far rom as possible and ignore any entreaties to get back together, Abusers keep people of balance by going overboard in apologies. If he does something extravagant to get back into your good graces, run faster.

[maerlindude]

I think you should get out of the relationship because such overreactions might become bigger issues in the future with other things. His reaction over such a trivial thing is just very shameful and disrespectful, I would never dare the girl I love a "fucking idiot". It's a huge red flag, even more so he hasn't talked to you for 5 days.

I can only repeat myself, try to get out of that relationship.

[Philyouup]

to call anyone a "fucking idiot" for a honest mistake shows immaturity, self centered behavior , and lack of empathy and understanding for the simplest of mistakes.. You deserve better treatment, dont punish yourself any longer and drop him like a bag of dog crap...

[SigmaWolfSupreme]

FUCK THAT MUTHAFUCKA. It was an honest mistake that you did out of habit. You didn't purposely lock him out and he pitch a fit. I'll continue being an idiot until he apologizes for being a dick or give him what he want and leave his ass.

[jus_chill]

It doesn't necessarily mean he over reacted. He might of had a bad day and that just made it worst. When a person is angry anything can annoy them. He's not to be blamed especially if it happened a few times. What may seem to be nothing to you may be a big thing to him and vice versa>

[Perspective22]

We actually had a great day. We both worked hard in the yard and then took the boat out for a swim then came home and had dinner.
I have lived on my own for the better part of my life. It’s a habit that will be hard to break plus I’m not sure I want to it’s a good habit to have.

[outside_Toronto]

Unacceptable. That would be the end of it if it were me

[IlyaTheImpaler]

Wtf 5 days no communication, over something so trivial?

[Perspective22]

I know, right?

[John1999]

Tell him ur sorry for what you did but he still needs to adress his reaction to a silly mistake

[sodaslut]

its probably his pet peeve. apologise with a gift for his birthday

[slatyb]

DTMFA. He's much too old to be so out of control.

[JaegerBomber]

Fly a plane into his bedroom

[eagle1951]

have a reunion, lock him out again, LMAO J/K

[Deukalion]

Over reacted